Levi, Mercede & Dopey Mom On Larry King Show Tonight!!!
Weren't we just talking about Larry King? Yes we were! Well, the "king of all media" has some very special guests tonight, straight from the meth/moose/Taco Bell capital of the world, Wasilla. The singular Levi and Mercede Johnston will sit down this evening with Hollywood's favorite death muppet, and dope-dealin' mom Sherry Johnston is coming along for the ride. (The ride will be in an actual pickup truck, driven from Alaska. Sherry will be shotgun. Mercede likes to be closest to Levi, in the night.)
Why won't Levi just go the hell away and work in the oil field or whatever, as was his destiny before he knocked up the daughter of the Queen of the Arctic? Because he wants ....money. It seems, according to whatever friend/sibling who keeps squealing to the tabloids, that young master Levi has a Big Idea about launching acustody battleagainst the family that runs the whole miserable state. And that's going to take money, for bribes and Xtreme Burritos and whatnot, so he is pursuing a BOOK DEAL.
Yes, this illiterate teen-aged high-school dropout wants to write book, about hislife, or at least the fateful two minutes in which his semen was ejaculated into the vagina of Sarah Palin's teen-aged Christian daughter, and one determined sperm swam up, up, up and penetrated the ovulating egg within, and the rest is Creationism, the end.