EPIC FAIL  3:18 pm April 15, 2009

Teabaggers Really Don’t Care For Jews

by Ken Layne

Why must they hate the Jews?
Brave Wonkette operative Matt Singerman is — and we say this with complete accuracy — just cold taking pictures of a handful of ill-informed dingbats wandering around in the freezing rain with their droopy signs about … well, take your pick, really. Remember when libtards were the ones who held the goofball million-cause marches? Well, now it’s the wingnuts’ turn, and they sure bring a new flavor to the proceedings. Mmm, tastes like racism!

Just let the wingnuts do their thing, okay? It's funnier that way.
Umm. What’s going on here, exactly? AH WE GET IT, libtards showed up and wore … boat captain hats, and rental tuxes, because that’s how the rich roll, right? This is a COUNTER PROTEST. And, as usual, not really funny, Billionaires 4 Bush, etc. Stop it.

Do you dudes SLEEP in those jumpsuits?
No taxes, Nobama, Kill Socialists … shut down Gitmo? Oh, right, these guys just walk around Washington every day. Come on, liberals, let the teabaggers have their moment in the sun freezing fucking rain.

Literally perfect in every way.
Wait, what does this sign even mean? Oh, right, nothing — it means nothing at all. That’s more like it! Happy teabagging day, teabaggers!

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Hola wonkerados.

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Judas Peckerwood April 15, 2009 at 3:23 pm

At first glance I thought that sign said “100% Tranny.”

cal April 15, 2009 at 3:23 pm

Wingnut guy forgot to add “Caucasian” to his sign.

19kevin8 April 15, 2009 at 3:23 pm

When do the teabaggers start snoodling?

chascates April 15, 2009 at 3:24 pm

A 3% tax hike on the 5% wealthiest is 100% tyranny?

Asking another 3% in taxes on someone who may make in the hundreds of millions of dollars per year hurts the rest of us in what way?

TaxWallStreet April 15, 2009 at 3:24 pm

The lady in the black dress in the first picture—-is the pixiliated area her lady parts? Also.

comradepaulson April 15, 2009 at 3:24 pm

Heart + Soul= Nancy Wilson + Al Green? And what does this have to do with the Jews?

nmmagayar April 15, 2009 at 3:25 pm

why is the second picture fuzzed out? I haz a confuzed

Serolf Divad April 15, 2009 at 3:25 pm

Laugh all you want, but I will tell you this: a lot of libtard friends of mine are having buyers remorse from electing Obama president in 2004, back when something could have been done to avert the current economic crisis.

Come here a minute April 15, 2009 at 3:25 pm

Hey! It’s that Ron Howard guy/gal again! Way to get around, Paultard!

toastandlove April 15, 2009 at 3:25 pm

You can tell the wingnuts haven’t been at this that long. The libtards have costumes and readable signs with proper syntax, probably printed somewhere elitist like “Kinko’s”, while the wingnuts did it old school with Sharpies and highlighters and posterboard and just writing down the first 5 words that pop into their head.

Mild Midwesterner April 15, 2009 at 3:25 pm

Why are they protesting? Out of work people don’t pay taxes.

havefunordie April 15, 2009 at 3:26 pm

Hey, look! Its our man/lady/ron howard friend!
(in the last photo, dripping on the right)

chascates April 15, 2009 at 3:26 pm

[re=290334]chascates[/re]: Jeebus! This whole thing has got me so pissed off I can’t even think about what I’m ready!! Plus I just got up.

shortsshortsshorts April 15, 2009 at 3:26 pm


televisionarie April 15, 2009 at 3:28 pm

I kind of want to send that last picture to the superfluous quotation marks blog.

hockeymom April 15, 2009 at 3:28 pm

These people clearly left the cake out in the rain.

Noodle Salad April 15, 2009 at 3:29 pm

[re=290341]Come here a minute[/re]: Ron seems to have aged terribly since this morning. Seems like the red line commute and epic protest fail really take their toll on a guy.

slappypaddy April 15, 2009 at 3:30 pm

i smoked a lot of crap in my day, including nutmeg, green tea (no shit), heavenly blue morning glory seeds, and the usual suspects, but nothing i ever smoked got me as addle-pated as whatever shit these teatards been puffing. this is the most revolting revolt IN HISTORY.

chascates April 15, 2009 at 3:30 pm

[re=290345]chascates[/re]: I meant reading. Goddamn it! I’m going to start drinking right now.

Anarchitect April 15, 2009 at 3:30 pm

Which disaster did Obama cause?

The stock market fail, the Iraq fail, the Afghanistan fail, the bank fail, the mortgage fail, the FEMA fail, the DOJ fail, the no bid contract fail, the Plame fail, the domestic wiretapping fail, the torture fail, the 9/11 intelligence fail, the no child left behind fail, the medicare drug fail…

Hooray For Anything April 15, 2009 at 3:31 pm

Stupid people protesting Gitmo- what’s the point in protesting an illegal detention center used for the torture of often innocent people when OBAMA WANTS TO RAISE OUR TAXES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Doglessliberal April 15, 2009 at 3:31 pm

I am sure the DC residents, who know from “Taxation Without Representation” quite well, are loving these idiots’ ideas of unfairness.

Internally valid April 15, 2009 at 3:32 pm

Is that a math problem on the first guy’s sign? Let’s figure it out. . . Looks like we’re left with Christian + Soul which I’m pretty sure is just Gospel. IS GOSPEL MUSIC OK WITH YOU MR PRESIDENT? HENGH?

PerhapsSo April 15, 2009 at 3:32 pm

I just poured myself a nice cup of Earl Grey in my warm dry office to celebrate these noble patriots.

StephanieInCA April 15, 2009 at 3:33 pm

I just thought about all of the actual, probably drunken, post-protest conservatard “hook-up” secks that is going to happen tonight. And I died a little inside.

Advocatus_Diaboli April 15, 2009 at 3:33 pm

[re=290334]chascates[/re]: it’s satire. not necessarily good satire, but satire nonetheless.

Nerdalicious April 15, 2009 at 3:33 pm

Don’t Rain On My Tirade. Colossal Laugh Fest.

Fantabulous article on nonsense by Paul Begala at CNN.
“The Boston Tea Party, in case the clods at Fox didn’t know it, protested “taxation without representation.” Note the second word: without. The goofballs tossing tea bags today have representation. They voted in the election; they lost. Bush’s tax policies were a godsend to the Paris Hilton class, but they sent the country on the road to bankruptcy and helped ruin the economy. Give me a break. Instead of tossing tea bags for the cameras, the Fox phonies ought to go to Walter Reed Army Medical Center. There they would find better, braver men who have truly sacrificed for their country. They deserve nothing but the best — not the shameful and shoddy conditions they endured during the Bush administration.

freakishlystrong April 15, 2009 at 3:33 pm

Good thing we all prayed to Jebus to make it rain..oh, wait…

Custerwolf April 15, 2009 at 3:33 pm

How uncomfortable to you suppose those people get whenever another photog walks away and they have to talk to each other again?

TurdBlossom April 15, 2009 at 3:34 pm

Is that Harry Potter in the last picture?

Joey Ratz April 15, 2009 at 3:34 pm

What’s the equation in the top picture?

Christianity – Capitalism = US heart and soul


Christianity = Capitalism – US heart and soul

Either way, it looks like Wingnutboy forgot a dash or three.

yosoy April 15, 2009 at 3:34 pm

[re=290334]chascates[/re]: Please engage irony detector. Even low sensitivity should be sufficient.

Custerwolf April 15, 2009 at 3:35 pm

“A man caused disaster.” That sign is more revealing than a Tarot card spread.

chascates April 15, 2009 at 3:35 pm

[re=290369]Advocatus_Diaboli[/re]: I can’t recognize teh satire cause I was up doing teh taxes. Of which I owe $700 to teh socialists. But I’m drinking tea this morning.

DagNabbit April 15, 2009 at 3:36 pm

Fuck this! After watching all of these ignorant, lazy, trashy and comfortably stupid white people embarrass this hard working white male, I am switching sides.

Glory to Allah, Death to the Infedels.

Fucking white trash assholes ruined my country!

Atheist Nun April 15, 2009 at 3:37 pm

[re=290335]TaxWallStreet[/re]: [re=290339]nmmagayar[/re]: There is a magical water that falls from the sky, it’s called “god’s tears over the stupidity of his so-called followers.”

youknew April 15, 2009 at 3:37 pm

I read that second sign as: A 3% tax hike for 5% of the wealthiest is 100% TRANNY!

Then started pondering how these people became fans of Christian Siriano of Project Runway. Seems an unlikely match.

19kevin8 April 15, 2009 at 3:38 pm

[re=290362]Anarchitect[/re]: The Repuglican losing power fail… and they are mad as hell… and not gonna take it anymore… so they are teabagging each other… and snoodling… next up, ATM.

ManchuCandidate April 15, 2009 at 3:38 pm

Is it really sad that the counter protesters were more organized than the actual tea baggers?

El Pinche April 15, 2009 at 3:39 pm

burning obama effigy in 1,2,3…

CaliforniaMike April 15, 2009 at 3:41 pm

[re=290368]StephanieInCA[/re]: And another generation of people too stupid to turn off Rush Limbaugh will be born.

CaliforniaMike April 15, 2009 at 3:42 pm

White fucking trash used to stay in the South.

wonderboom April 15, 2009 at 3:43 pm

I, for one, am ready to surrender.

We’ve gotta know when to fold ‘em, guys.

TGY April 15, 2009 at 3:44 pm

Ken’s right. This is the kind of crap people spew when they can’t go around with signs reading ‘AH MAH GAWD, A NIGRAS PRESIDENT’.

Atheist Nun April 15, 2009 at 3:45 pm

[re=290370]Nerdalicious[/re]: “The goofballs tossing tea bags today have representation.”
I was just having this same conversation an hour ago… the FAIL is strong, so very strong!

Looking at these pictures, well… it’s like someone created a “stupid shithead magnet” and sucked all the stupidest, shittiest shitheads out of every McCain/Palin rally, gave them some cardstock and a sharpie and dumped them in front of some Fox cameras (the only people on Earth who give a flying fuck about any of this.)

Cape Clod April 15, 2009 at 3:46 pm

Is there some secret code that wingnuts speak that only they can understand? Because, Jesus Christ in a chicken basket, I can’t fathom what sort of message they are trying to get across.

LittlePinky82 April 15, 2009 at 3:47 pm

Billionaires 4 Bush! LOL I love those guys and gals! Haha. Funny how the rightwing come out and protest when the billionaires are getting more taxed but not about the Constitution or illegal occupations or torture and rape of people including children. Ah don’t you love it. I was waiting on the Jewish conspiracy and George Soros.

LittlePinky82 April 15, 2009 at 3:48 pm

[re=290331]cal[/re]: LOL the Christian guy doesn’t know his Bible very well. Jesus said to give all to the poor and help those who are weaker. The first Christian’s in Acts actually did communism. Of course I’m sure it wasn’t called that back then since Marx and Engels wasn’t around to write the Manifesto yet. But anyways they shared everything and nobody owned anything of themselves and they helped each other out. So Jesus was a socialist and so were the first Christian’s in Acts. James was against rich people too.

LittlePinky82 April 15, 2009 at 3:49 pm

[re=290342]toastandlove[/re]: LOL I love those sharpie signs.

Doglessliberal April 15, 2009 at 3:54 pm

[re=290431]LittlePinky82[/re]: most people who make an issue of their Christianity fail to espouse most of the things Jesus actually said and stood for. I, as an atheist, am usually more “Christian” in my acts than many of the bigoted, close minded, mean spirited Christians out there.

Plus, the asswipe in the picture missed the part about American equalling people of all races, creeds, and colors.

CaliforniaMike April 15, 2009 at 3:54 pm

[re=290418]Cape Clod[/re]: Their message is don’t tax anyone, but protect us from the Muslins.

Nerdalicious April 15, 2009 at 3:54 pm

[re=290415]Atheist Nun[/re]:
They can’t even stay with one leader for 5 seconds. They have the attention span of a flea on crack. Today it’s the oh so statesmenlike Rick Santelli. What happened to Palin? Limbaugh?

Mustang April 15, 2009 at 3:58 pm

HAHAHAHAHA. God’s raining on the Wingnuts’ big party day.

AnnieGetYourFun April 15, 2009 at 3:59 pm

Heh. I think that the counter-protests are pretty funny. But then, I think Jon Stewart is funny, so I’m obviously not up to Wonkette standards of this-isn’t-funniness.

Prommie April 15, 2009 at 4:01 pm

[re=290378]chascates[/re]: those are Borat wannabees, sir.

Mustang April 15, 2009 at 4:01 pm

[re=290343]Mild Midwesterner[/re]: They are protesting that they got born to stupid people so they have to be stupid too. Not fair.

MiddleC April 15, 2009 at 4:02 pm

C’mon. We could hardly expect a serious economic crisis without the resurrection of Father Coughlin. I have no doubt that if Herbert Hoover were alive today, he’d be turning over in his grave.

Prommie April 15, 2009 at 4:02 pm

[re=290431]LittlePinky82[/re]: Marx lifted the line “from each according to his ability, to each according to his need” from Acts.

thefrontpage April 15, 2009 at 4:03 pm

Anyone out there protesting today against the administration or against tax policies that include tax breaks for the lower- and middle-classes is an asshole. Pure and simple, these morons are all psycho assholes.

The Helvetica Scenario April 15, 2009 at 4:05 pm

[re=290450]Doglessliberal[/re]: Remember that part of the Bible where Jesus goes to the Temple and offers everyone subprime mortgages?

P Drizzle April 15, 2009 at 4:05 pm

[re=290370]Nerdalicious[/re]: If he weren’t such an insufferable douche I’d almost say this article is…well-reasoned.

Lazy Media April 15, 2009 at 4:05 pm

[re=290335]TaxWallStreet[/re]: [re=290339]nmmagayar[/re]: Raindrops keep fallin’ on my lens

Prommie April 15, 2009 at 4:05 pm

I must quote a great great man who once said “the stupid was so thick you could saw it into blocks and pick them up with tongs.”

Hooray For Anything April 15, 2009 at 4:06 pm

[re=290431]LittlePinky82[/re]: Isn’t it somewhere in Mathew where Jesus said “the meek shall inherit the earth through the cutting of capital gains taxes?”

Yaybuls April 15, 2009 at 4:09 pm

Those teabaggers are getting all wet!

What they need is a good pair of Arabian goggles to keep them dry…

Or maybe a glass-bottomed boat ride out into the Potomac will help them get noticed…

Or perhaps they should get a brass quartet together to play patriotic tunes outside the White House. Although with all the rain, they may end up getting a rusty trombone.

Lazy Media April 15, 2009 at 4:09 pm

[re=290387]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Well, it is DC. You could organize a big libtard protest just by picking every fourth person out of brunch line in Adams Morgan, plus one French tour bus.

Doglessliberal April 15, 2009 at 4:11 pm

[re=290492]The Helvetica Scenario[/re]: that is right near the part where he slaughters all the nonbelievers, right?

Atheist Nun April 15, 2009 at 4:14 pm

[re=290454]Nerdalicious[/re]: Someone needs to create a parody Wingnut Frankenstein Leader to lead them all off a cliff… Unless that’s already happened with Glenn Beck… deep in my heart I have a dream that he will rip off his mask on TV and actually be Joey Skaggs or one of the ‘Yes Men’ or something.

DustBowlBlues April 15, 2009 at 4:22 pm

[re=290362]Anarchitect[/re]: Win. (cut & p**te comment–queebo*r* out)

CaliforniaMike April 15, 2009 at 4:26 pm

[re=290514]Atheist Nun[/re]: The right will have its next Reagan when he explodes, full-grown, out of Rush Limbaugh’s massive gut.

Mad Farmer Manifest April 15, 2009 at 4:32 pm

I like the counter protesters. When the “God Hates Fags” assholes came through town, we had infiltrators holding signs that said “God Hates Figs” and “God Hates Kittens”. Comedy gold.

DustBowlBlues April 15, 2009 at 4:44 pm

[re=290431]LittlePinky82[/re]: so were the first Christians in Acts.

Chap 4 Verse:32-35. They shared all in common.

From Methodist Me.

Gallowglass April 15, 2009 at 4:45 pm

I’ll say this for us liberals, we do clean up nice. Three comparatively beautiful people, well-dressed and smiling in the midst of these cheeto-stained, scowling, troglodyte Paultards makes for a lovely picture.

IceCreamEmpress April 15, 2009 at 4:46 pm

The problem with the “Billionaires 4 Bush” people chiming in on this is that their Thurston-and-Lovey-Howell shtick isn’t really relevant to these fucking illiterate trogs.

bassdroid April 15, 2009 at 4:47 pm

Teabaggin mongoliods…

Atheist Nun April 15, 2009 at 4:47 pm

[re=290548]CaliforniaMike[/re]: Who is playing John Galt in the upcoming film version of Atlas Shrugged? Just prop that guy up and give him a script to read off a TeLePr0mTeRz, written by Alan Keyes.

sati demise April 15, 2009 at 5:06 pm

[re=290421]LittlePinky82[/re]: dedicated love for the Billionaires for Bush…..I imagine the teabaggers think they are teabagging. haw haw

Itsjustme April 15, 2009 at 5:26 pm

[re=290330]Judas Peckerwood[/re]: So did I!

sagaderisa April 15, 2009 at 5:36 pm

Yeah, I agree – I’m a big fan of Billionaires for Bush. Their signs are kind of funny, but the idea of Billionaires for Bush protesting “with” the ill-informed teabag wingnuts? THAT’S hilarious. I mean how long do you think it’s going to take the teabaggers to figure out that it’s a counter protest? And can you imagine their smiles fading as they realize, via the B4B signs and then Norquist et al speeches, that that’s what the organizer’s message is? Hah do you think they’ll even realize that?

rocktonsammy April 15, 2009 at 6:10 pm

I hate America.

d4g33z April 15, 2009 at 10:51 pm


GaySailor April 15, 2009 at 11:14 pm


I just read it, and I can’t stop laughing… Oh, gawd, my side hurts…

GaySailor April 15, 2009 at 11:17 pm

[re=290736]sagaderisa[/re]: No… hell no! “Teabaggers” don’t do satire. Satire requires an intelligence advanced enough to realize “Teabagger” is an unfortunate thing to call oneself when not promoting “Hot-Gay-Mansex!”

GaySailor April 15, 2009 at 11:25 pm

[re=290375]Joey Ratz[/re]: I think the equation is: The square root of Christian – Capitalism divided by American Delta (heart) plus Soul equals one over zero or “Doh!”

Logicmaster April 16, 2009 at 10:50 am

Ok, this is the WORST article writing I’ve ever seen. This is more pathetic than FOX NEWS! How exactly does a sign saying Christian Capitalist equate to being anti-jew? Please explain.

Believe me, I am on board with the “idea” that this article is pathetically attempting to convey, but really, do your criticisms have to be as dumb as the signs themselves?? Its sad that you’re no better than they are!

Har Har, if this was an attempt to be funny, then next time try something a little more sophisticated. This is more on par with a bad fart joke!

Czn939 April 16, 2009 at 2:25 pm

[re=291517]Logicmaster[/re]: Wonkette is a satirical political community fixated on Trucknutz and buttsecks…
Y so srs?

DangerousLiberal April 17, 2009 at 8:32 am

Logicmaster: On par with a bad “fart joke”? You’re new to these parts, aren’t ya pardner? It starts with the fart jokes, and, also, rapidly goes down hill from here. Not like that’s a bad thing, of course.

widget09 September 14, 2009 at 1:52 pm

Most of the teabaggers are repressed homosexuals. Publically, they would disparage homosexuals, while privatly, they engage in homosexuality.

Look at the blatent racism/classism in the 2nd photo from the top:

“America was buildt on the backs of poor people” “Why stop now”

zhubajie April 15, 2010 at 3:59 am

[re=290334]chascates[/re]: Don’t they know the Bible? “From he who has much, much is expected.”

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