INTRA-TEABAGGER WARFARE: It's Paultards/Randians/Truthers/Seceshes/'Libertarians' Vs. 'Astroturfers'/GOP Leadership/Hannititties/Fat Cats/Gingrichians/Santelliosos/Fox News/Dick's Armey...??...!

What the headline said, duh! Uhh... hmm. It's becoming impossible to follow the rapidly developing Balkanization within the Teabagger Movement. Let's try to figure it all out in one post! Here's the general storyline: Paultards and other "radical libertarians" are claiming that the Tea Party concept has always beentheirprotest idea, for like infinity years, and that it was a damn good one too (got Dr. Cong. Paul elected president no?) until these fucking corporate-backed fucks, the mainstream Republican electoral apparatus, started laundering money into some "AstroTurf" (fake grassroots HA HA!) fat cat Establishment entities andhijackedthe brilliant tea bag concept, (somehow) turned it into a joke, blasted it on Fox News, and fucking ruined fucking everything AGAIN WILL THESE PEOPLE EVER LEARN?

Now for something different, here's a paragraph that makes sense! It's from a fellow named Mark Thompson, who appears to be in the Paulrandlibertruthcession Camp -- the creative minds behind this whole colonial- or Revolutionary-era imagery-as-an-ethos masturbatorySecond Lifestyle crusade:

As Stephen Gordon, fresh from the Bob Barr campaign, has been taking great pains to document, the people at the root - though for quite some time no longer the forefront - of the Tea Party protests have been as vocal as could be over the last 8 years’ orgy of spending, “preemptive” war, civil liberties abuses, etc., etc. Gordon is - rightly -skeptical that the other groups joining in the demonstrations are only fair weather friends. I suspect and expect that he will quickly find his skepticism validated as the protests increasingly become nothing more than a vehicle for movement conservatives to advance their whole agenda, including a whole host of things that were the reason people like Bob Barr and others turned their backs on Republicans in the first place.

Oh BOB BARR our ass. The "people at the root" don't care about him. The "people at the root," as someone wrote in to Andrew Sullivan yesterday, are just the Paultards, as usual:

Just wanted to let you know that Mark Thompson is right. The tea party idea has actually been around for a while now. It grew out of the left over Ron Paul supporter groups from the last election. I was heavily involved in that campaign and, as such, still am on the contact list for a lot of the grassroots groups that were created during it. The first time I heard about the "Tea Party" idea was probably well over a year ago.

But why is it catching on only now, after Ron Paul's historic race to the presidency, when tea parties can no longer WIN HIM ELECTIONS? And why aren't the Paultards getting full credit for this idea which, again, is basically the filet of brilliant political ideas?

Maybe because, let's see, PAULTARDS ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PEOPLE ON EARTH.

Some Tea Party organizers are discovering what liberals discovered in the anti-Iraq War protests of 2002 through 2008 and fretting about how to avoid fringe activists from taking over the events. In Burleston, Texas, one Tea Party will be run by self-described secessionists. In Pensacola, Florida, a planned Tea Party has fractured over the involvement of Ron Paul supporters and 9/11 conspiracy theorists. “At any big gathering you’ll have fringe elements show up,” said Andrew Langer with a shrug. He plans to bring “big blue arrows” marked “Tea Party crasher” to point at any fringe protesters or infiltrators who show up at the event in Washington.

"Andrew Langer sounds like an asshole," you're thinking right now. "Who is he?" Langer is an employee of the surprisingly anti-Paultard "Institute for Liberty," which along with Dick Armey's "FreedomWorks" and Newt Gingrich's "American Solutions" forms the evil "Astroturf Axis" of Fat Cat-bankrolled tea party organizers, the ones that have turned this friendly Paultardian jaunt in the April sun into little more than a front to raise cash for Republican candidates in 2010. Rick Santelli, the ranter, is also somehow involved with this.

You can imagine the mood at Ron Paul Forums these days. Here's sexy poster "HOLLYWOOD" complaining about the Corrupt Republican Hijacking of their testicle-sucking idea, in the context of something that happened on The Rachel Maddow Show last night -- you know, like when Maddow and her sniveling sidekick "Cocks" MADE UP LIES ABOUT RON PAUL?

So the GOP & Big Business win again, the small-government hippies lose. Another Tax Day in the history books. This post is long. It could be longer.

Meh. Here are some funny pictures from the defeated Georgia Paulrandlibertruthcessions, who have to sit through that git Sean Hannity at their co-opted Atlanta party tomorrow.