A Hill staffer sends us this comical image and writes: “This fridge is located outside of the House Republican Conference in Longworth House Building. They seem to be moving offices, and this is a note they have attached to their fridge.” Be sure to read the very end, in which the Chocolate Milk Nazis note that the House Republican Conference “steals too much.” But perhaps the American People do not give a shit if some Hill staffers are drinking too much stolen chocolate milk?

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  • Mild Midwesterner

    You are still free to drink as much “Hershey’s” chocolate milk as you like.

  • Accordion-o-rama

    Rants like this belong on the Internet, not the refrigerator!

    I will now dedicate 12 paragraphs to this subject…

  • WickedWitch

    more proof that the US government is run by preschoolers.

  • suchsweetthunder

    Stealing chocolate milk is against the law in Oregon.

  • BillyClubb

    The House Republican Conference “…borrows too much, drinks too much, steals too much.” At last, an admission of guilt. The Repubs may be finally on to something with this burst of self-realization.

    Now, when do we hear about the child molesting, mistresses, and male hookers?

  • Accordion-o-rama

    Oh, I get it now. “P&P use” is a way around that new Oregon law.

  • Dr Tobias Funke

    great application of mad lib talking points

  • Will work for shoes

    What’s in that Nestle chocolate milk?! Premium brandy? Chocolate milk of any brand ain’t that expensive.

  • shortsshortsshorts

    Spending over $10,000 from every man, woman and child in the United States on a failed recovery program? Definitely.

    But don’t fuck with chocolate milk, god dammit.

  • DCBadger
  • freakishlystrong

    Republicans drink chocolate milk? Geddout.

  • Sussemilch

    “The American people deserve better?” There’s a nice little understatement. For 700 billion dollars I want chocolate milk to come out of every faucet in America for a thousand years.

  • Let’s Go Vertigo

    Good thing they included the ® after “Nestle.”

  • loudmouthredhead

    So this explains why all of those GOP-ers keep getting outed for strange sexual perversions: They’re all hopped up on Nestle(R) chocolate milk, which is European(c) and, therefore, full of gayness(tm) and sin juice.

    If anyone would like to license the terms on that note or this post, write to…

  • bago

    Miss Epitome Virginia got bought beer again.

  • magic titty

    I’m assuming this is sarcastic, just because it has to be, because.

  • rcdl

    P&P? Guess the Republican Conference can’t get off of Craigslist.

  • Jerk Cade

    They need it for page-bait.

  • Dr Tobias Funke

    well if chocolate rain will raise your neighborhood insurance rates- anything chocolate will _______

  • chascates

    PUSSY! Just place melted chocolate Ez-Laz in a little choco milk and watch teh fun.

  • loudmouthredhead

    [re=285489]freakishlystrong[/re]: The chocolate is added later to the initial whiteness, kind of like white kids taking to rap music, so it’s ok.

  • Terry

    [re=285474]Mild Midwesterner[/re]:

    You’re right. They should immediately suspect a staffer for a district in or around Dauphin County, Pennsylvania.

  • suchsweetthunder

    I’m assuming that this has something to do with Obama, just because it has to be, because.

  • rambone

    It’s just an attempt to get everyone to keep drinking the Rush Limbaugh Kool-Aid instead.

  • Styrofoam Boots

    Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Integer elit. Suspendisse nunc. Sed mi arcu, rhoncus sit amet, sodales at, pellentesque quis, purus. Donec molestie lacus eu tortor. Vestibulum ante ipsum primis in faucibus orci luctus et ultrices posuere cubilia Curae; Vestibulum sit amet ante. Aliquam porta. Proin accumsan dolor a nunc. Etiam posuere. Curabitur facilisis consectetur orci. Proin accumsan ante id purus eleifend suscipit. Praesent ultrices diam id leo. Donec sapien magna, accumsan vel, tempus at, placerat eu, dolor. Sed nunc est, tincidunt eu, tincidunt eu, commodo ut, leo. Etiam lectus. Nullam scelerisque ornare odio. Morbi risus risus, aliquam ullamcorper, consectetur in, pretium a, diam. Cum sociis natoque penatibus et magnis dis parturient montes, nascetur ridiculus mus. Nam cursus iaculis dui.

  • Dr Tobias Funke

    [re=285505]rambone[/re]: yes- but its worse- how much of a corporate tool is someone who includes the (r) after Nestle?

  • Uncle Al

    Members of Congress are the geeks who were in Student Council in high school, where they thought they were a big deal, being too out of it to realize nobody but geeks cared about Student Council, and the other kids were off getting high and having fun. Now they’re members of Congress.
    And the only people geekier are the Congressional aides. They are chock full of self-importance, and just death if they corner you at a party.

  • 51dimes

    Trigg is unamused by this hoarding of chocolate milk.

  • SayItWithWookies

    It’s a known fact that theft of chocolate milk has been on the increase ever since the gays could get married.

  • TGY

    Bah, you make me squirt chocolate milk out my nose! Oh, the waste.

  • Tommy Says Soooo, Jugdish!

    Poop Chute Punch is still available to all comers.

  • queeraselvis v 2.0

    [re=285489]freakishlystrong[/re]: Of course! Like their pages, chocolate melts in their mouth, not in their hands.

  • tunamelt

    Passive aggressive notes dot com!

  • JudasConstant

    My freshman roommate left me a similar note after I ate some of his Nutella. (These has to be a better way to phrase that.)

  • bago

    [re=285508]Styrofoam Boots[/re]: Latin in your face! Conjugate those verbs!

  • Lionel Hutz Esq.

    How else are you supposed to lure a 12-year-old page back to your office without Chocolate milk?

    The real scandal is that Republicans are stealing foreign Nestle’s chocolate milk, instead of good, American Hersey’s chocolate milk.

  • gurukalehuru

    Chocolate milk is a valuable fucking thing. You don’t just give it away.

  • shanemacgowan

    [re=285478]suchsweetthunder[/re]: Only if done for sexual gratification.

  • rambone
  • sevenrepeat

    [re=285517]TGY[/re]: it made me squirt chocolate milk out of my arse. oh, literally…the waste!

  • shanemacgowan

    Why are we commenting here? Stephanie and Rachel are available for comment.

  • shanemacgowan

    Sorry, Courtney, not Stephanie.

  • AllHat

    How soon until nestle has to apologize to Rush?

  • BadKitty

    I love those passive aggressive notes co-workers leave around the office. “Your mother does not work here – please clean up after yourself”. I put uncovered food in the microwave, crank it up to 30 minutes and just leave. MWAH HAH HAH HAH!

    I’d be throwing empty chocolate milk cartons back in the fridge after I was done.

    Yes, I am a passive aggressive pain in the ass. Why do you ask?

  • Hart88

    Apparently the next person who filches the chocolate milk doesn’t get her tickets to the Spring Formal

  • Styrofoam Boots

    [re=285529]bago[/re]: Sorry, but I’m afraid that’s illegal in Oregon.

  • problemwithcaring

    [re=285520]tunamelt[/re]: Dear Milk thief: That was breast milk.

  • Monsieur Grumpe

    Just when you think the Republicans can stoop no lower. What next? Ovaltine enemas?

  • 2druk2phluq

    [re=285556]problemwithcaring[/re]: Once you go breast you know it’s the best.

  • shortsshortsshorts

    [re=285550]BadKitty[/re]: I like your style.

  • Canmon (the Inadequate)

    I didn’t realize Republicans liked chocolate milk. I thought they were all into homo.

  • Godot

    P&P = pencil & paper, like Dungeons & Dragons?

    Are House staffers seriously complaining that someone’s stealing their snacks for when they play tabletop role-playing games?

    And what the heck kind of chocolate milk is “very expensive to buy”?

  • AllHat

    [re=285496]magic titty[/re]: Yes, they’re pretty funny, those HRC staffers.

  • Min

    They can have my chocolate milk when they pry it from my cold, dead fingers.

  • TGY

    [re=285541]sevenrepeat[/re]: I admit your mishap is more tragic.

  • Woodwards Friend

    P&P? Is that David Vitter’s fetish?

  • Red Zeppelin

    [re=285493]loudmouthredhead[/re]: If the staffer who wrote that message isn’t full of gayness (the bitchy, retentive, passive-aggressive variety), I will take a chocolate enema.

  • picadillythirds

    Why isn’t this picture on

  • sevenrepeat

    [re=285565]Godot[/re]: i always thought p&p (or pnp) meant “party and play” which references drugs and sex. so it is written.

  • Crosseyed and Painless

    I’m pretty sure the second note is a joke making fun of the people that left the first note. No?

  • NoWireHangers

    P&P??????????????????????? Of COURSE this was near the House Republican Conference!

    From Urban Dictionary:

    Ii>1. P&P
    (verb) to “Party & Play”. Term seems to originate from Craigslist and/or other personal ads where the poster of the ad is in search of someone to Party (Do drugs. Usually Crystal Meth.) and Play (Engage in sex acts or intercourse.) with, just for the day/night. This term seems to be most prevalent among homosexual men.
    “Hung White Man, 35, ISO young Vin Diesel look-alike for P&P, you host. I’ll bring the D!”

  • arewethereyet

    [re=285508]Styrofoam Boots[/re]: Say What??????

  • Atheist Nun

    [re=285613]picadillythirds[/re]: haha that’s the first thing I thought… I emailed it to them

  • Rebel Countess

    Lay them off.

    Lay ALL of them off.

    It’s the only way to help them grow some real problems for themselves.

    Perhaps the coping skills will follow, although I would not bet on it,
    given the evidence presented here.

  • artbot2000

    NAILED it!

  • Barebear

    I wonder if they’ll be asking for TARP money to restock the fridge . . .

  • zenferret

    [re=285474]Mild Midwesterner[/re]: Damned French CHocolate Milk… It should be Freedom Chocolate Milk!

    Oh… Swiss?


  • chascates

    Isn’t Nestle the company that paid all the lobbying money to be able to sell their childrens’ milk stuff to the poor overseas?

  • Jukesgrrl

    Gee, imagine how much chocolate milk was consumed when Denny Hastert was hanging around the House Republican Conference!

  • PsycGirl

    This year for my husband’s birthday, I won’t buy him the bottle of single-malt Scotch but go with the insanely expensive chocolate milk instead. Won’t he be surprised?

  • Lionel Hutz Esq.

    [re=285545]shanemacgowan[/re]: Sorry, Courtney and Rachel can’t comment right now, they are too busy with my cock in their mouthes.

  • Crank Tango

    My passive aggressive note would simply state that I have dunked my teabag into said luxury chocolate milk and if they didn’t want to taste of my trouzernutz, it’s my way or the Hershey highway. Then again I would be drinking ovaltine like a real merkin and not that nestlé shit. Except for quik, that’s acceptable.

  • An American in Toronto

    [re=285564]Canmon (the Inadequate)[/re]: Hee! Win!

  • Alpha O. Mega

    [re=285504]suchsweetthunder[/re]: [re=285556]problemwithcaring[/re]: You’re both onto something. “Chocolate” is not the flavor of the milk, but the color of the human breasts that produced the milk. The purpose of the sign is to express the GOP leadership’s displeasure that some of the younger staffers are drinking the breast milk of the First Lady and various members of the Congressional Black Caucus. This is not the sort of change we can believe in.

  • comradepaulson

    Again with the liquid refreshments and the GOP. When does this party move on to solid foods?

  • llyn

    [re=285508]Styrofoam Boots[/re]: I second that.

  • bitchincamaro

    P.S.: Help yourselves to the pistachios.

  • octupletsmom

    *P.S. “The Play-Doh Warden this week is Brittany, and Jennifer is the Marker Monitor.”

  • The One True JP

    Republicans surprised their own are stealing from them? Expected! Republican staffer too poor to help their own with tiny luxuries? Irony! Also, Ron Paul only drinks Strawberry Quik.

  • NJB

    Chocolate milk? What an OUTRAGE! What’s next? Little Debbie Snack Cakes? Where will it end?!

  • SteveCharb

    HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! …”Pee-pee.”

  • arclight

    They wouldn’t happen to have any chocolate Silk soymilk in there, would they? Mmmm…

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