Surely you are aware that the Teabaggers are holding their biggest tea party EVAR on Tax Day to protest how they, uh, got tax cuts in the stimulus package. Here is their promo video and their website, which has open comments. They are very sensitive about politics… and we are a WAR BLOG… so… MUSH, MUSH! [Tax Day Tea Party]

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  1. Bummer — I’ll check it out after work, at which point there’ll probably be nothing left but a heap of smoldering wreckage and a lot of obscene comments in all caps. But you guys have fun.

  2. “Speak now … [dramatic pause] … or FOREVER hold your peace.”

    Because Congress really, really, reallyreallyreally, wants to hear from you. And you can make a difference! Oh yes you can! Oh yes you can, you widdle cutie! Is you a good widdle cutie?

  3. Damn, only 2 comments on Wonkette, and I visit the Tax Day Tea Party site and it seems like it’s already crashed. It’s hard to beat Gopherit and Shorts to the punch, but I tried.

  4. Teh local Unitarians are already prepping to monkey-wrench ’em here in Auburn. I’d appreciate any pithy ideas for signs.

  5. Meh. Those comments are already loaded with LOOOOOONG wingnut rants fundamentally misunderstanding our system of govt.

    Our delicious snark (should we grace them with it) would never be found by anybody, since there’s too much boring crap already posted there to wade through.

  6. [re=285360]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Don’t even bother. It’s just a bunch of serious-minded, earnestly intended Ron Paul leftovers. Here: Imagine whatever you think is the most fingernails-on-the-chalkboard screechy nagging rant, double it, pour a fifth of gin in it, spin it around and set it on fire, and then you’re getting close.

  7. My favorite recurring post over there comes from the geniuses who propose “just not paying taxes” on April 15. Like any of them are going to pay anything on April 15, other than the interest on their tax return loan.

  8. It says:
    You are posting comments too quickly. Slow down.

    WTF does that mean? My crazy rant isn’t any different from the others on there!!

  9. [re=285373]Lascauxcaveman[/re]: Yeah, they are being super-serious and sharing their true feelings over there. It’s kinda gross–I don’t know what kind of sociopath I should pretend to be.

  10. wow i have never done that before, it was really liberating. i feel so alive.

    except now it told me i am commenting too fast.

    no more nutz :o

  11. What a weird video. Unpleasant, angry-sounding music that sounds like your nephew composed it on a $49 Casio. Unfocused message. These people are not ready for prime time.

  12. AC/DC? What kind of message does that send? You know they still use the old lingo over there, of course. Here are the lyrics for funsies (Why do they have such a problem with picking music):
    I was caught
    In the middle of a railroad track (Thunder)
    I looked ’round,
    And I knew there was no turning back (Thunder)
    My mind raced
    And I thought what could I do? (Thunder)
    And I knew
    There was no help, no help from you (Thunder)
    Sound of the drums
    Beatin’ in my heart
    The thunder of guns!
    Tore me apart
    You’ve been – thunderstruck!
    Rode down the highway
    Broke the limit, we hit the ton
    Went through to Texas, yeah Texas
    And we had some fun
    We met some girls,
    Some dancers who gave a good time
    Broke all the rules, played all the fools
    Yeah, yeah, they, they, they blew our minds
    And I was shakin’ at the knees
    Could I come again please.
    Yeah the ladies were too kind
    You’ve been – thunderstruck, thunderstruck
    Yeah yeah yeah, thunderstruck
    Oh, thunderstruck, yeah
    Now we’re shaking at the knees
    Could I come again please.

    I can only assume Brian Johnson has teabagged multiple groupies, so I guess it works.

  13. Open comments? How monumentally stupid of them. I do like their idea of “How about we just not pay our taxes. They’re bound to notice then!”

    I hereby endorse this movement of felony tax evasion.

  14. [re=285360]SayItWithWookies[/re]: It’s already going down in flames, even as we speak. I doubt they’re even be any smoldering wreckage left after this carnage. Just a lot of ash wafting in the breeze.

  15. Just went there, scrolled a random amount, copied first sentence of comment. Got this: ” I too beleive that the taxes were too high under the republicans as well as the Demecrats.”

    I quake in fear of our new Teabag Overlords. Not.

  16. I tried to do my part to distinguish myself in their comments, but when I clicked Submit I got an error message saying “You’re posting comments too fast. Slow Down.”

  17. [re=285428]deutsch[/re]: It’s either a cookie or some IP hanger or something. Try opening another browser window, if it retained your name & email delete them, reload, and try again.

  18. [re=285451]DagNabbit[/re]: No, I used the same handle I have here.

    [re=285465]tunamelt[/re]: I second that. This is like running with a bunch of virtual vandels.

  19. [re=285445]Noodle Salad[/re]: aww jeez. I’m touched.

    Growing up in a wingnut family has its advantages sometimes. The therapy is expensive tho.

  20. [re=285522]snideinplainsight[/re]: Sadly,

    NOTE: This list is moderated. Your submissions will not appear until they have been approved. This could be a matter of minutes or hours, depending upon how busy I am. Sorry, but this is necessary to prevent our friends on the left from sabotaging the list. I also reserve the right to tweak slogans for spelling, punctuation, etc. and to reject near duplicates.

  21. Sniff…. I love you guys*. Seriously. You complete me.

    *In Minnesotan, “you guys” is not gender specific so that would apply to you gals, too.

  22. Its down. but I didnt type this out for nothing:

    Only Joe the Plumber can save us now. When he gets horny on the podium, I get hard. Hard up to fight my own governmint! REVOLUTION!!! TEA!!! JOE TEH PLUMBERS QUIVERING NECK MUSCLESZZ!!!

  23. [re=285525]Aardvark Gumbo[/re]: alll that means is you have to tailor your snark to the paultards liking. At some point they might figure it out.

  24. My problem in reading through many of the comments is that unless the post mentioned trucknutz or teabagging as a sexual practice I couldn’t tell the satirical Wonkette posts from the genuine wackaloon posts. Some of these folks are far beyond the reaches of parody.

  25. And raise your digital hand if you came up with this one (if no one speaks up I’ll happily believe some Freeper wrote it in a fit of prosaic ecstasy):

    “Don’t FAIL your country — I will be their with Tea Bags because Taxation without Representation is TRANNY.”

  26. I was just there, and all the comments towards the top are unintentionally stupid, i.e. by teabaggers. Harder, better, faster, stronger, people!

  27. Fuck me I can’t get this thing to post on the Teabag site. From “Molly Ringworm”:

    This is the most important thing to happen to America since PUMA. That spells Party Unity My Ass. Get it? It’s where the first letters of a phrase spell a word. And that word is PUMA. That is the kind of intellectual power America needs today.

    I say us PUMAS need to get on board with the Teabagging. This is a practice that will bring us peace and meaningful transformation.

    I say that Teabagging will help us send a message of real emotional power to those who recognize only the cold hard facts of reality. We call them Muggles. You call them Congress.

    I say that PUMAS need to find the Next Ron Paul in order to lead us out of this dark age and into the new age of womyn running everything. This is why we need Teabagging. Because of the bags of tea.

    That way my husband will attend to spiritual matters instead of watching the NASCAR while I want to watch my stories on TV and oppressing me like this for no reason at all.

    In cases like this I usually recommend you just eat the placenta. Because blood returns to the earth in a spiritual sense and you cycle needs to be timed to the moon’s cycles. This is why Victor always wins on Days of Our Lives. He deprives the womyn of the placentas.

    Teabag the PUMAs!

  28. [re=285557]phineas_bounderby[/re]: it is hard to be sure because a number can produce these rants effortlessly. However, I was reading the comments, thinking “goofs”, when there comes the first: “TRUCK NUTZ!!!”. Cripes, they overwhelmed everything. you guys!!! (sobs)

  29. So they remove all of my horrible, over the line comments and leave this one…

    We wasn’t in no recession whens King George was in charge!
    Wez was happier then…

    What trash. Let’s have a fucking TrashBagParty and just show up at their houses with a bunch of Hefty bags… white ones.

  30. YES! I’m in! I’m in!
    Keep trying compatriots, if Lady_Kenneth_Layne_III_Dutchess_Of_Trucknutzshire can get a comment through, there’s hope for us all!

  31. Oh come on guys, their name makes a lot of sense. From what I understand, teabagging is a very effective way to stimulate…a package…

  32. Since they’re removing our comments, I say we not only stay at it, but redouble our efforts all through the night. Make ’em EARN their right to free speech, the same way anyone anti-Bush has had to do for 8 years. Let’s give ’em the longest sleepless night they’ve ever had.

    Once more into the breach!

  33. [re=285589]Atheist Nun[/re]: Ooof. Spoke too soon, they have deleted my screed. My Screed, I say!

    I say… I think it is quite likely that I have happened upon the wrong internet web page. I was searching for reviews of various fine English teas. I do so enjoy a nice piping hot cup of Earl Gray, the bergamot can be so heady! Quite!

    Nevertheless, now that I have found you good Ladies and Gentlemen here discussing various ways to defraud your federal government, I shall, for the very wicked thrill that it sends to my nether-regions, engage in a topical conversation with you, if you shall allow me the privilege.

    I dare say that it is very curious to the gentlefolk of other countries that so many of you Americanites would blame one of your politicians for the grave mistakes of his predecessor, but we have all come to a good-hearted consensus that it is most likely due to your inherent racism rather than any sort of logical conclusion derived from a steady and sober study of the facts. Why else would the wretchedly poor defend the obscenely wealthy? What other explanation could possibly supply an answer for why you would agree upon such delusional hallucinations on a mass scale about television equipment? It is clear to the outside world that either you simply hate black people, or you have convinced yourselves that your insipid and weak political party of losers can be launched back into the forefront by petty bickering, childish name calling and warped, erroneous groupthink dictated by a select group of floundering, confused and hate-filled overlords who call for the actual physical death of their adversaries rather than offer a comprehensive plan of their own. Quite!

    I must say, you have wholeheartedly thrown yourselves into what we call in my country a Mass-Delusional Retard Clusterf*ck. Cheerio! Pip! Pip! -Lady_Kenneth_Layne_III_Dutchess_Of_Trucknutzshire

  34. It’s really not fair, I was just starting to get rolling;

    What physical damage do taxes cause? In addition to the disease causing potential of taxes they also can be quite destructive. Taxes’ front teeth continue to grow throughout their lifetimes. The tax must continually gnaw on objects to wear down these teeth so they do not grow too long. This gnawing activity can cause damage to electrical lines, burglar alarms and to the base of doors and entrance ways. Taxes will also seek out soft nesting materials and will gnaw at items stored in basements, sheds and garages. These items include patio furniture cushions, pool covers, stored clothing and bedding.

  35. [re=285604]snideinplainsight[/re]: Love It!

    I’m starting to copy and paste my screedlets so they don’t get wiped out again. :(

    The Feds know that A STORM IS COMING! They are quaking in their boots, siccing the liberal lap-dog media matters group on us and fox news for collaborating. I think the SEIU is behind these new tax laws and their reach of power is strong. You can tell from the employee free choice act that would allow them to unionize a conflict-cleanup-crew-detail if they wanted to. I can’t wait till Chicago’s Tea party! I’m also glad we decided not to let that traitor Michael Steele come and speak. He’s the worst RINO I’ve ever heard of.
    By AStormIsc0ming

  36. Those simple shits won’t let mine on now:

    From: Jon R. Tea

    “WOW! I don’t know how everyone found out my birthday is April 15th but I’m just overwhelmed! I thought when I got out of prison last November after that child molestation deal that was the greatest day of my life.
    But your throwing me a birthday party is now the ultimate!

    I’ll be at the halfway house, of course.

    I’m just, just blown away!”

  37. I’m playing the race angle:

    Sarah Palin: “Now that I know what teabagging is I’d totally let Obama do it to me. That hunk of dark meat makes me wetter than a slip ‘n slide.”

  38. Here’s mine, before it goes the way of the dodo:

    For some reason, they wouldn’t accept the comment until I selected a username that had neither “ass” nor “fairy” in it.

  39. Your comment is awaiting moderation.
    Wow. How long did it take those dumbfucks to figure out the “moderate comments” feature? 6 hours?

  40. [re=285522]snideinplainsight[/re]: I suggested “I {heart} teabaggers”, but I’m guessing that won’t get by the moderators.

    Also, there are comment sections for each individual state. We should not ignore those.

    Someone should calculate how much their teabagging parties are going to cost the taxpayers (processing permits for each location, increased police presence,etc).

  41. I tried this one:

    “Damned socialist librals! We’ll show them who the real Merikins are with our teabagging!
    I’m bringing my AMERICAN MADE leather chaps for the teabagging.”

  42. Shit, comments are now being moderated. Goodbye Ken Uckledragger, Shiftless Negress, MadHatless, Mary P. Rankster and all my other altered-states egos.

  43. My best Zen contribution lasted all of a minute:

    To realize a
    Real America, a nation
    Under God
    Calls for unorthodox measures
    Keeping true to the Constitution
    Not the changing winds of a
    That is offered by President

  44. [re=285634]The Helvetica Scenario[/re]: [re=285632]Gopherit[/re]: There are some hilarious Facebook groups set up for this thing. I’m exploring the Seattle page now. I had no idea we had so many mouth breathers in this town. They must be scared to leave the Ruth’s Chris Steakhouse because I have never met any of them.

  45. Some of our posts survived, although I think I’m going to do some Esker Melchior styled all caps rants later (and not enter my Wingnuts in the Wild website in the web page field, which probably made my post easy pickin’s for the admin).

  46. I can only hope that in the moderator’s search and destroy mission a number of genuine wingnut teabagger posts got caught in the net along with our epistles.

  47. [re=285656]Kev-O-Tron[/re]: Funny. I was just at that RC last night for happy hour ($4 martinis!). Great place to see how the other more retarded half lives.

  48. I simply ADORE it when Sir Newell calls us to war!

    when the blast of war blows in our ears,
    Then imitate the action of the tiger;
    Stiffen the sinews, summon up the blood,
    Disguise fair nature with hard-favour’d rage

  49. I’z trying Wonkettes…

    This is WAR people!!!!!! We lost the election by large margins, and clearly the majority of the public is brainwashed by the MidStreamDriveByMedia (read MSNBC and Wonkette). Therefore, the obvious course is to get together in small dismal groups of mouth-breathers and take the country back for the marginalized irrelevant minority.

    It’s especially important to try and usurp a populist revolt that started the American Revolution, and wrap ourselves in Old Glory, as if a peaceful transition to the lawfully elected president, and the turnover of a sizeable majority of congress actually meant that congress could actually legislate, and the executive could…well…execute. It makes no sense, especially to someone who can READ THE CONSTITUTION!!!!! Our forefathers intended that the marginal minority of the party that looses the election actually holds executive and legislative powers…the sad minority (DAMAMIT MSNBC…except for Margaret Brennan) who calls themselves WE THE PEOPLE are the legitimate airs of democracy, otherwise we’re living in a SOCIALIST FASCIEST MUSLIN TRANNY!!!!

    Ron Paul was right, these T r u c k N u t z are nice! TelePromPterZ!!!!!ACORN!!!!11111TeLEPromPTerz.

  50. If you search that site for Truck or Nutz you get nothing. But if you search for communist, communism, socialist, socialism you’ll get hits.
    And you know they’d love to have truck nutz on them trucks.

  51. Wow, you kidz haz been busy. Too late to get in before the moderator woke up but whoever posted the Dirty Sanchez discussion group is my new hero.

  52. Curiously, my little ironic observation was not deleted.

    “I’m proposing having all us tea-baggers refuse government checks during the month of April, just tear them up and send them back to the government. THAT will show them!”

  53. May I suggest a new approach to get by the moderator:

    Till dawn we work, our country
    ravaged by enemies washed
    upon our shores. Perhaps we
    can find it within ourselves to
    kindle a new Americanism.

    No time has there been such an
    urgent need for action. To the walls,
    to the walls! We must repulse the

  54. Those people are fucking retards. Honestly.

    The next person who says income taxes are unconstitutional is going to get whacked with my copy of the Constitution, handily turned to the 16th Amendment.

  55. Oh, and my post there, since it won’t make it through moderation, I will share with you here:

    Have any of you actually read the Constitution? The 16th Amendment, specifically, which gives the Congress the authority to lay and collect income taxes.

    Also, for those who speak of original intent, there is a reason why the founders wrote into the document the means to change it as needed. They weren’t prescient; they knew they were merely men and not gods, therefore, not omniscient. Times change, and, as they do, our Constitution must, as well.

    So, by all means, have your protests, but, if you do, at least know what you’re talking about, lest you are dismissed as reactionary nutjobs.

  56. Did they get permission to use that AC/DC song? My guess is no. So now the wing(truck)nutz like piracy too? On top of trying to by like the Taliban and what nots????? Someone check on this pronto. We may be able to bring the bastards down! Goddamned teabaggers!!!!!!!!! BTW, don’t they know that libtards love to snort coke off of hookers and abort fetuses while having gay sex and listening to Thunderstruck?

  57. moderating comments = communism.
    the teabaggers hate freedom
    here’s my poor little censored ditty:

    There’s a Revolution brewing,
    a teabag I am chewing.
    The President is black,
    Somebody suck my nutsack!

  58. Hey, I joined Wonkette just so I could show what I put on their “website”:

    You know, I can’t wait to see the looks on these liberals as we teabag our way across the country! They can have my middle class tax cut and their supposed new oversight. I like my market free, so that the great cars like GM and Chrysler can continue to dominate stupid Honda without the government greenies acting like all, “wahwah polar bears and crap!”! I liked our government better when I thought they might be wiretapping and we had a secret assassination squad, I felt safe and didn’t need to teabag these fools! If the people can’t figure out the answer to this crisis lies in our own Savior, then this problem doesn’t deserve to be solved! I will always TEABAG!

    Mostly, just wanted to use teabag as a verb to see if it could stick. It also includes wingnut safewords like “Savior” and “greenies” and “Stupid Honda”

  59. eww. i looked at the website of these texans and lots of pictures of them ‘protesting’ obama. bunch of trailer freaks. i have to say, there’s nothing i find more disturbing than a right-wing ‘protest.’ and have you ever noticed how they always use their spawns? there are always trailer kids AND babies holding signs up too (usually looking bewildered – or on a fruit loops high – or both).

  60. [re=285909]gferris5[/re]: Well done. We have to go subtle now that they are moderating.

    I just posted some crap about what are good american tea brands to buy because we don’t want $ going to the hated British taxers

  61. [re=285381]chascates[/re]: “You are posting comments too quickly. Slow down.”

    Real Paultards only type one fingered on the keyboard. Don’t ask where the other hand is

  62. I think we should all wax our balls on April 14th so the republicants do not get a nut hair stuck in their teeth. Happy Tea Bagging!

  63. Well, at the risk of these comments being monitored if the Teabaggers are that resourceful, here’s the submission of my friend MELON ESKIOR (wish him luck in getting past the moderators):





  64. T ea parties across this land!
    R eveal the liars and the thieves.
    U surpers must be held accountable
    C all your Congressman
    K ids are gonna have to pay these debts!

    N o means NO!
    U ntil the money is sent back!
    T ea parties are the
    Z eitgest of our times!

  65. They certainly know how to save a dime — they’ve gotta have the cheapest ISP around. I’ve been trying to refresh the Virginia page for about fifteen minutes now, and nothing.

  66. [re=285717]Dog Trombone[/re]: god damn it now i have to catch up with you MFs having a Day of War while i had a day from hell.

    let slip the dogs of war…

  67. Hey, this guy has the ticket, let’s Tow the line! Tow it! Put it in the junkyard!
    “FINALLY, someone is speaking for the MAJORITY, wee who work hard and pay our taxes. WELL YOU KNOW WHAT? maybe President(?) Obamination will notice if WE STOP TOWING THE LINE!!!!!”

  68. [re=285906]smashtheduck[/re]: I am so fucking honored and humble and grateful that my little remark survived the great tea party comment purge of 2009.

    i dedicate this award to my brothers, the noble freepers.

  69. Um, so these people are upset about paying taxes….but aren’t advocating anything other than Grrrrrrr….
    Ok….Uh, yeah….um…didn’t the majority of these people just get a tax break….um, how many of these Einsteins have health insurance…uh, public roads, schools, SS and Medicare….uh…..those take taxes…..
    So whats the point????
    You don’t like your rep, vote them out. You like a rep, vote them in…..ummmm, I must be a total douche noodle but I just don’t get it.
    Guess the fact that when Dems win, it requires anarchy…..and they call US crazy activists….oh well.

  70. [re=285983]gferris5[/re]: [re=285996]Dumpster Muffin[/re]: Actually, that’s me but I can’t outfunny the revolutionaries. Dumpster Muffin wins!

  71. While I sort of understand why they might have deleted a cogent post from me (But, really, until “President” Obama promises not to tax Truck Nutz, can any of us be free?)

    Still, that doesn’t explain why they erased comments that they first allowed up by Bill O’ at or Glen at I guess they just don’t care much about freedom there. Ron Paul must be crying over his copy of the Constitution now.

  72. Strange, there were over 320 posts this afternoon, now they are down to 180. And, while they took away all of our passionate post, but they still let this go up today:

    A pitiful fool has found his way into the oval office, and his leftist Marxist Socialist radical cronies are systematically eating away at the fiber of this country. And because he has a built-in escape device (namely the ability to peg anyone that disagrees with his lunatic policies as a “racist”), our right to Freedom of Speech is being systematically challenged by an uncivil attempt to “shame” us into silence.

    or this:

    he Feds know that A STORM IS COMING! They are quaking in their boots, siccing the liberal lap-dog media matters group on us and fox news for collaborating. I think the SEIU is behind these new tax laws and their reach of power is strong. You can tell from the employee free choice act that would allow them to unionize a conflict-cleanup-crew-detail if they wanted to. I can’t wait till Chicago’s Tea party! I’m also glad we decided not to let that traitor Michael Steele come and speak. He’s the worst RINO I’ve ever heard of.

    or this:

    ’m amazed at what utter sheep the Obots continue to prove themselves to be. I always wondered how people could be so weak minded as to follow Jim Jones to the grave. The Obots are no different and I’m sure would follow Obama to whatever destination he chose to lead them. I see Obot comments on every blog i read and they are amazingly ill-informed and are always seething with anger.
    I cannot wait unitl April 15th. I know the Tea Parties are designed to be non-partisian because both major parties are guilty of abusing the people who make this country work. However, with that said, never in our history have we had the poison that currently head the 3 chambers of our elected government. I will attend and obvserve the Tea Party as a peaceful non-partisian particpant but my figurative finger will be pointing specifically at the 3 heads of our government who are going to be responsible for sinking this country into more debt many thought humanly possible.

    or this:

    We are a rudderless nation – without legitimate government.
    We have a usurper who was not born in this country who has assumed power, who followed another usurper who was illegally placed into power by a fiver-person brown-shirt group of the Supreme Court. It is time the people of this nation rise up and throw out these liars, frauds and criminals – not just out of office – but out of the entire nation.
    With apologies to Mr. Payne, *THESE* are the days that try mens’ souls.
    God help our nation.

    Sheesh, what does it take to get deleted over there other than to say Truk Nutz Rulez!

  73. [re=285847]Alabama Parrot[/re]: I saw that! I’ll have to go check if my comment is still there. I complained about being out of “vanilla chai”. Maybe they are too stupid to understand….

  74. I don’t understand why this didn’t make it through the moderator…

    “Teabaggin can’t wait! Woo Hoo! Should I bring my truck nutz or will real ones be provided,”

    Just askin..

  75. [re=286016]Lionel Hutz Esq.[/re]: I’ve been doing some research into what it takes to get deleted over there. First lesson: There’s no freakin’ way to get any sort of “Lord on our side or not, my fellow teabaggers, maybe we shouldn’t say we are the majority after Obamanation and Acorn pulled the wool over the voters eyes last November” up there, no matter what crazy shit one types around it.

    Sure I have a life, why do you ask?

  76. On this surface the tea party phenomenon is about taxes. I think that in actuality it is about the precurser to an armed revolution and in fact the original got all the final players together. Watch the rhetoric escalate. This is pure mental obfuscation and will not result in tax changes as the first did but armed insurrection.

  77. I used a Markov text synthesizer to scramble chunks out of one of the earlier posts, but it’s still awaiting moderation.

    Probably “” isn’t going to make the cut, let alone “Cleve Landsteemer”.

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