• February 14, 2012

Gross.Early this morning, in Wonkette’s Daily Briefing, we had this to say about Blago’s replacement: “There’s a new Illinois governor, right? And he is ‘squeaky clean.’ So god only knows what kind of kinky stuff will bring this guy down.” Now we know: New Illinois Governor Pat Quinn is one of the original practitioners of the political sex-creep stunt of “tea-bagging.”

Jesus, we knew it would be bad, but we didn’t know how bad:

He has built a reputation for political stunts; three years ago, he urged utility customers to mail tea bags with their payments to protest rate hikes.

Yay, a Democratic Paultard. What else is gross about you, Governor Quinn?

“You ain’t seen nothing yet on populism,” he said. “I’m here to put the pop — the people — back into populism.”

Goddammit just shut the hell up.

Spotlight focuses on ‘squeaky clean’ new Ill. gov [AP]

{ 44 comments }

picadillythirds April 6, 2009 at 3:23 pm

With all that tea bagging, no wonder he is squeaky clean.

bitchincamaro April 6, 2009 at 3:26 pm

“…he has a Boy Scout mentality.”

Queer hater.

Serolf Divad April 6, 2009 at 3:28 pm

“I’m here to put the douche…” …well, you get the picture.

shortsshortsshorts April 6, 2009 at 3:28 pm

“I’m here to put the ‘shit’, errr… ‘market’, behind the word ‘bull’ again.”

DC Hates Me April 6, 2009 at 3:30 pm

“He believes in goodness and evil”

His tie is evil.

Sussemilch April 6, 2009 at 3:31 pm

Populism is evil. It makes a congressman out of Steve Largent, a President out of Ronald Reagan, and left unchecked will crown an Empress of the virginal Hannah Montana.

DagNabbit April 6, 2009 at 3:32 pm

It all floats down here…

One Yield Regular April 6, 2009 at 3:32 pm

“I’m here to put the pop…back into populism.”

I can’t for the life of me figure out what that means. Is the border wall going to built out of Brillo boxes?

DagNabbit April 6, 2009 at 3:33 pm
4tehlulz April 6, 2009 at 3:34 pm

Corruption never looked so good right now.

The Cold Sea April 6, 2009 at 3:34 pm

Is there anything better than teabagging? No, I didn’t think so.

TGY April 6, 2009 at 3:35 pm

The divorced father of two — sons ages 24 and 25 — doesn’t like coarse language and is unfailingly polite

I guess the governorship is now a fricking valuable thing.

Atheist Nun April 6, 2009 at 3:35 pm

“I’m here to put the bags — the sweaty balls on your foreheads — back into teabagging.”

sevenrepeat April 6, 2009 at 3:35 pm

let lady caca put the pop back into populism and just focus on those tea bags. microtrends.

SayItWithWookies April 6, 2009 at 3:36 pm

He’s also here to put the spring — a source of water bubbling up from the ground — back in Springfield.

Suds McKenzie April 6, 2009 at 3:37 pm

Ironically, when my landscaper, “Mr. Sanchez” raised his rates, I included a handful of dirt with my bill.

Come here a minute April 6, 2009 at 3:37 pm

“You ain’t seen nothing yet on tea-bagging,” he said. “I’m here to put the tea — the testicles — back into tea-bagging.”

magic titty April 6, 2009 at 3:37 pm

“I’m going to put the money back in money shots.”

Great dood, thanks.

american mutt April 6, 2009 at 3:38 pm

[re=282144]One Yield Regular[/re]: I think he’s going to erect a giant Obama pin and dumpon cheneys lawn.

supremecourtjester April 6, 2009 at 3:56 pm

Maybe he just likes tea….

bricks April 6, 2009 at 3:58 pm

“I’m going to put the ‘glory’ back in ‘gloryholes’… and by ‘glory’, I mean my extremely average penis.”

© Pat Quinn

freakishlystrong April 6, 2009 at 3:59 pm

“I’m here to put the bag back into douche”

Jukesgrrl April 6, 2009 at 4:00 pm

How many years until Malia can run for governor?

Red Zeppelin April 6, 2009 at 4:05 pm

[re=282142]Sussemilch[/re]: Virignal? Nah, I bet her daddy did her years ago–that’s the way it goes with the country music crowd.

ah pook April 6, 2009 at 4:14 pm

“I’m going to put the ‘ass’ back ‘asshattery’”

norbizness April 6, 2009 at 4:28 pm

Maybe the malevolent ghost of Harold Washington can kick him down a flight of stairs, or the actual Harold Washington, should he be alive, since I’m not interrupting this sentence to Google it.

Lascauxcaveman April 6, 2009 at 4:48 pm

[re=282157]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Yes, but will he put the “bub” back in “bubblehead?”

gurukalehuru April 6, 2009 at 5:18 pm

I think with that statement he just put the ill back in Illinois.

hobospacejunkie April 6, 2009 at 5:22 pm

[re=282237]norbizness[/re]:

Jesse’s Boys: “You can run for President Jesse! Look at Harold Washington. Maaan Fuck Harold Washington.”

Jesse Jackson: “Yeah, fuck Harold Washington”

Actually, Harold Washington has been dead about 20 years.

assistant/atlas April 6, 2009 at 5:23 pm

Pat Quinn is the new Joe Biden.

[re=282142]Sussemilch[/re]: “virginal Hannah Montana”…ha. You should probably read more tabloids. Because if she’s a virgin, then I am the rapturous re-incarnation of Jeebus.

LittlePig April 6, 2009 at 5:24 pm

[re=282237]norbizness[/re]: Harold Washington had one too many rib platters. Perhaps we should get Governor Gomer an unlimited all-you-can-eat pass.

Putting the dip back in dipshit.

lampadadog April 6, 2009 at 5:36 pm

[re=282130]picadillythirds[/re]: A little tear came out of my eye, that was so funny!

proudgrampa April 6, 2009 at 5:49 pm

He puts the “numb” back in “numbskull.”

102415 April 6, 2009 at 7:56 pm

Today I had a cup of tea but it didn’t taste so good.

S.Luggo April 6, 2009 at 8:46 pm

Succeeding Blago is like getting a root canal without an anesthetic and being unable to scream “fucking fucker fuck your fucking fuckingness” after the dentist drills the wrong tooth.
— (Sen., no really, 5th Amendment absoluto assured) William Burris.

(Pat, write when you find work. – Richard Daley, Jr., Emperor Biggus Dickus, 5th Ward)

gjdodger April 6, 2009 at 9:21 pm

As Pat Fitzgerald would say, “I’m here to put the ‘Governor’ in ‘Leavenworth’.”

thebeatgoeson April 6, 2009 at 10:49 pm

[re=282458]gjdodger[/re]: HA!

obfuscator April 6, 2009 at 10:59 pm

[re=282237]norbizness[/re]:

I miss Harold. He had the chutzpah to call Old Man Daley a racist during a mayoral primary debate in which Daley’s son was a participant. Good stuff.

animalmagnetism April 6, 2009 at 11:42 pm

[re=282493]obfuscator[/re]: Most racially charged city election ever. Fire on the Prairie. Council Wars!

S.Luggo April 6, 2009 at 11:53 pm

[re=282292]LittlePig[/re]: “Harold Washington had one too many … platters.” To satisfy, what were still, the ethnic kitchens of Chicago, when the Irish/Slav/Slovak/Italian cops still called blacks “n*gg*rs”. Washington served the price of being ahead of his time.

obfuscator April 7, 2009 at 1:15 am

[re=282513]animalmagnetism[/re]: I wish “Fire on the Prairie” was still in print. I’m sure Eddie V. regrets living long enough to finally be indicted.

wolf_at_my_door April 7, 2009 at 10:26 am

the new governor may be a dweeb but layne’s mind is clearly in the gutter. if it has his name on it I’m skipping it. don’t need his stuff in the morning.

animalmagnetism April 7, 2009 at 1:28 pm

[re=282539]obfuscator[/re]: I got my copy at Fields a million years ago, it is one in my scant collection of books, right next to “Myra Breckenridge.”

An indellible memory of those times is the televised all-night City Council meeting held to vote on the successor to complete Harold’s second term, with Richard Mell, (Blago’s father-in-law) standing on a desk screaming his head off trying to fend off the nomination of 4th Ward Alderman Tim Evans and get their “own” black guy Eugene Sawyer in there, with demonstrators out on LaSalle Street.

“Politics ain’t beanbag.”

obfuscator April 7, 2009 at 7:12 pm

It was so nice of Mell to get Blago elected governor, too, also.

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