Wonkette
You know what sucks? April Fools crap on news websites. You know what wouldn’t suck at all? If Doktor Ron Paul became the one true chairman of the Republican National Committee. Oh, the laughs! Oh, the costumes! Oh, the love (spelled backwards, on a blimp). Sadly, this didn’t happen, and it will never happen — but not because Ron Paul is a nut, and not specifically because his remaining followers are all actual hobbits. It’s because Republicans hate Ron Paul’s guts. They would sooner appoint Cynthia McKinney as RNC chairman. [Conservative HQ]
But, in the new post-Joe era, us new-non-experts can make this happen just by NOT KNOWING ANYTHING ABOUT IT!…so, it’s true…yay!!!…
The comments, as usual, are the best part:
I got nailed on one of these April Fool jokes about 10 years ago. I was so excited by the article that I started emailing the company to get more information. I had the same reaction to this article. My wife raises dogs and the big event is when a promising male puppy’s testicles drop. I thought we had something going here.
To coin a phrase, WTF?
If Repubs followed the votes on that website they put out from awhile back, Steele really should’ve been replaced with a big ‘ol pair of TruckNutz.
Yaybuls: Is that what the puppy testicle comment was alluding to? Too subtle for me.
ot…. Huffpo: sarkozy wants regulators to reach inside US boarders… eeewwwww
It takes balls to mock up a CNN “Breaking News” graphic using a graphics package that hasn’t been used in months.
More comments:
After Dolly called RP, “moonbat crazy”, Bog wrote:
“Dolly, you need a needle put to your big false boobs steele tits mentality to bust your ignorant and revealing redneck education remark about Dr. Ron Paul.”
At this point, the Repubs should really be represented by an Elephant Furry, it’s become so yiffy..
I actually have more respect for Ron Paul than I do for Steele. Sure, Paul is batshit crazy and has a legion of religiously devoted followers, but he does tend to stand by his views a wee bit better than Steele, does. Then again, you can say the same thing about Mason, I guess.
…unfortunately Ron Paul is only 6 different flavors of crazy, now a days to become the head of the RNC you need a minimum 13 flavors!
I don’t see why not. I think the Repubs need an airforce of blimps and a more open presence on 2nd Life (as opposed to the covert presence–I see you, Larry Craig.)
bitchincamaro: Priceless.
I’m kind of sorry for ‘Joan’ who writes that she had high hopes for Michael Steele but is now ‘disillusione’.
By the way, the web design of that site is pathetic, also.
Terry: Sure, but have you SEEN Steele’s rap battle with Colbert? The man has earned undying respect from me. Until Tehdisco loses and Steele is ignominiously tossed into the wilderness, because making libruls laugh is not enough credentials for the RNC chairmanship.
AngryBlakGuy:
Ron Paul
1) Fiscal Responsibility Lime Sherbert
2) Don’t Like Dark Chocolate Chocolate
3) Old Coot Vanilla
4) Blimps Ahoy Bubble Gum
5) Pot Pistachio
6) Cherry Sacred Fetus
RNC
Tainted Love Rum and Gummie Bear Kids
7) In the Closet Rainbow
9) Stem Cell Strawberry Surprise
10) War What Is It Good For Chocolate Mint
11) Election Rocky Road
12) Klan White Vanilla
13) Wing Nut Cluster (Vanilla with an assortment of anti-psychotics)
Aardvark Gumbo: If this guy’s a Republican, why is he talking about when a dog’s testicles drop?
bitchincamaro: That, bygod, is pure found poetry.
bitchincamaro: It doesn’t get much more delightful than Paul zealots calling Bitterz retarded, radical, poorly educated crazy redneck fucks, with hideous bodies.
I want to see a Ron Paul/Michael Steele rap battle.
Actually, I like it when you get good news April Fool’s jokes from news organizations. NPRs are usually fun.
But I think in exchange, Wonkette and the Onion should strive to break a real news story on something like nuclear promulgation every April Fool’s Day.