Wonkette
- Word has it that the Justice Department will be dropping its case against Ted Stevens — a case it already won, but which Stevens looked likely to win on appeal. [AP]
- The dreaded Conficker computer worm appears to have done … nothing, even though it is April Fool’s Day and crazy stuff always happens on this crazy day. [BBC News]
- Employees at a Caterpillar plant in France facing layoffs kept their bosses locked in the office overnight, and President Sarkozy said “OK then I will try to help you keep your jobs, since you are such valuable workers.” [Reuters]
- The National Republican Senatorial Committee said Sarah Palin would deliver the keynote speech at their annual dinner, but then Sarah Palin said that nobody had bothered asking her and she had a scheduling conflict, and so now the NRSC has uninvited her from the dinner. [Christian Science Monitor]
- The endless Coleman-Franken battle now pivots on 400 absentee ballots, of which Coleman would have to win about 75 percent in order to prevail. [Minnesota Public Radio]
- The leaders of Afghanistan and Pakistan are meeting today in Turkey to discuss security strategies. [Bloomberg]
Sarah got disinvited by the NRC when it found out her life is being controlled by Scientologists.
Only thing creepier than Jeebus-freaks are Xenu-fondlers. Ask the ShamWow guy.
Poor Sarah got Newtered. Oh wait, nothing to see here.
As the leaders of Afghanistan and Pakistan meet, Secretary Clinton makes comments regarding the Taliban: http://www.governmentalityblog.com/my_weblog/2009/04/now-clinton-wants-to-talk-to-the-taliban.html
Happy april fools day all!
i don’t unnerstand how these yooropeeans can spen the day protestin. don’t they have JOBS?
oh…ok. nevermind
OK, so a Republican-led Justice Department prosecuted Ted Stevens, winning a conviction in time for him to be so smeared that he lost his bid for re-election, but bungling it so badly that the newly-Democratic-led Justice Department feels obliged to drop the case.
So they really didn’t need Michael Steele and Rush Limbaugh and the blank budget to self-implode. The process was already well underway a year ago.
Oh, and on behalf of the American people, Mr. Stevens, let me say a very sincere and heartfelt “We’re sorry.”
Word has it that a very nice crow with chipoltle and raisin sauce will be served at the NRSC dinner. mmm yum.
Not sure if its related to Conficker or not but kos blogs about an ongoing Denial of Service attack at the Great Orange Satan. Its probably just a million Glenn Beck worshipers throwing their wooden clogs into the gears.
hobospacejunkie: Mr. Stevens, let me say a very sincere and heartfelt “We’re sorry.”
He can’t hear you. He’s on his deck, submerged in a bubbling tub of Cristal and 3-diamond whores. Huzzah.
Why is Sarah Palin a Republican? She’s so bad at doing what the menfolk tell her to do. If only she weren’t snowbilly trash in her heart….
Vive la France! You can’t judge the French by Anglo standards. The left has been so strong for so long and has had the rug yanked from under it in the many changes of government. Vive la Révolution! Allons enfants de la Patrie, le jour de gloire est arrive!
hobospacejunkie: Word. Had I been voting in my home state (see avatar) I would have voted for my homie Mark Begich, word is bond. But this prosecution was so lame that you’d think it was put together by a bunch of Regent’s Law grads who slapped the case together in the chapel/law library/torture chamber over a weekend-long cheese-pizza and diet-sprite fueled frenzy. Oh, the one kid said “aren’t we supposed to show potentially exculpatory evidence to the defense,” and his classmates said, dumbfounded, “what’s exculpatory?” Ass.Hats.
Vive la France indeed! I’ve had a few bosses *I*’d like to lock up.
It’s just like “Tout Va Bien,” except that Carla Bruni could never in a million years be Jane Fonda.
hobospacejunkie:
I wonder how the Repub leadership is going to react. They’ll just say Holder is soft on crime.
One thing about Caribou Barbie is she is canny. She knows not to associate herself with a failing brand. My guess is she goes back to that Alaska Freedom party or whatever that no-nothing redneck thing is.
I heard that the issue was that Sarah had no place to stay and was worried that the possibility of early humidity would wreak havoc with her up-do. I extended a nice offer for her to stay at my place in Alexandria (convenient access to Metro AND my downstairs guest room stays nice and cool, even in the height of the summer heat), but haven’t heard back.
Apropos of nothing, I think I found the NYT’s April Fools piece. Hint: MoDo’s column.
All right, Sarah! Way to pull on your bitchpants, girl.
Yeah, lock the bosses up, great idea! That way they can claim that any new labor contracts they sign were done so under duress and therefore null and void, and then said managers can quit skip town once they get out. And when the company is unable to find anybody crazy enough to take over managing the place (at least not without hazard pay and armed body guards), everybody gets laid off instead of just 25%!
Brilliant! Your only consolation is that this will probably inspire management at the local Komatsu and Volvo plants to buy one-way tickets to GTFO, crippling the competition as well.
OMG! She’s insane!
OT but …
Hahaha, the republican joke-of-a-budget released on April Fools day. Those guys can’t do anything right.
Guppy06: It’s France! France does not run on logic, it runs on Gaul! Vive la France!
..oh, and nuclear energy.
Laugh at his trux now, Wonketteers, and you will feel the wraths of the Gr8t TeD, for revving and winches aplenty are again at his disposal…
Another standing ovation in the works?
http://photos-b.ak.fbcdn.net/photos-ak-snc1/v2510/14/80/539504154/n539504154_2419121_6436187.jpg
Red Zeppelin: I only saw the headline about No More Hummers and thought she was ragging on Bill Clinton again.
So, the Republicans prosecute and convict Senator Stevens, but then the criminal loving liberals let him go. Typical Democrats. Might as well set all the terrorist free.
O/T but this is cute — the Guardian is going to cease printing and go twitter-only:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/media/2009/apr/01/guardian-twitter-media-technology
“[Celebrated Guardian editor] CP Scott would have warmly endorsed this - his well-known observation ‘Comment is free but facts are sacred’ is only 36 characters long,” a spokesman said in a tweet that was itself only 135 characters long.
hobospacejunkie: AG Holder did the right thing. Although I hate Stevens with a fire that burns brighter than a thousand suns, the prosecution did fuck it up the case countless ways and an appeal would likely have been successful. The irony is incredible, tho. How long before Dr. Orly Taitz, DDS, Esquire comes up with a conspiracy theory for this one?
Caterpillar plant in France
I’m a ‘murrican, and I gotsta say, that’s just plain wrong.
Mock the French all you want, but at least they got off their asses and did something. The only people in this country who appear to be standing up and fighting for something are a bunch of idiot poor people tea bagging each other for the right for rich people to get richer.
And I’d like to lock up my ex boss too.
Hooray For Anything: That would look fantastic on a resume.
“So, why did you leave your last position?”
“Uh… personal differences.”
Hooray For Anything: Exactly! And if I mock them, I mock them lovingly, being somewhat of an amateur French historian. Vive la France!
Hooray For Anything: I hope you don’t think I was mocking the French. They put Americans completely to shame when it comes to political participation and standing up against rights being taken away. Last time I was there one of the many daily protests - and this in normally calm banlieu, no less - looked like the siege of Stalingrad (admittedly not the best metaphor). People were lined up on the roof, waving flags, shouting, and dumping flyers, garbage and furniture into the street. And that was only because a dozen people had been laid off from a printing company.
Guppy06: I’d say it shows that I’m pro-active, take the initiative, and am a great problem solver.
Hooray For Anything: Ironically, you sound well-suited for a management position.
One Yield Regular: I love how one of the Republican talking points is that if Obama’s policies pass, we’ll be like France and I keep on thinking myself what’s wrong with free health care; cheap education; four weeks vacation; generous unemployment benefits; being somewhat smart is considered a good thing to be; and copious nudity on tv and in films?
LOLLOLLOLLOLLOL!! GOP = fail.
Y’know, that’s hardly satisfying anymore. It’s like tripping a crippled kid.
Guppy06: Or, the workers take over the plant and run it themselves.
I should also mention that in US America in the 1920s, it was common for bosses to keep a worker’s uniform in their office closets, just in case uppity socialists took over and they needed to sneak out unobserved.
Hooray For Anything: Yes, surrender to the Germans.