DEATH MATCH  10:52 pm March 31, 2009

Tedisco-Murphy Race Basically Tied, Dem Leading

by Ken Layne

Wow, how much did we not want to see this result from New York’s Congressional District 20 special election. Neck and neck! Dead Heat! Photo Finish! Etc. You goddamned people, can’t we just have an easy election, it’s over, Michael Steele is fired — he gets fired either way, hah! — and then we, uhm, move on to 2010/2012?

But, Democrat Scott Murphy is in the lead. It’s a real lead, not some court thing or lizard people or whatnot.

Republican test-case Jim Tedisco is 65 59 votes down, with “Final Precincts Reporting” across the district. Scott Murphy is leading — 77,344 to 77,285. That’s almost half of a tenth of a percent!

Anyway, Go Democrats, or whatever we are supposed to be doing. Yes! Tedisco is kind of a hapless fool in this case, as he had a solid lead until the Morons from the RNC and RNCC and whatever wingnut PACs came to town and reminded people just how odious Republicans have become in this country.

We will update! Here is Nate Silver’s slave on 538, and here is the Albany Times Union. Seems like nothing on the cable news. Not a big deal or anything!

UPDATE: CNN has Handsome Anderson Cooper accusing various people of being stoned, and making some jokes with some celebrity gossip. There is a very large bald-headed black man showing how to “curtsy.” MSNBC has shout-y Keith Olbmermann interviewing the guys who explode stuff on a teevee show called Myth Busters. Come on dudes, pretend to care! This might be a Harbinger or whatever. OH RIGHT it would only be a harbinger if the Republican won.

UPDATE the 2nd: Some 5,900 absentee ballots were filled out and mailed back in time. Are these counted yet? We guess not, because who cares, right? Also: Military ballots have until April 13 to come in, so, well, see you on April 14! Maybe?

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Bearbloke March 31, 2009 at 10:54 pm


IceCreamEmpress March 31, 2009 at 10:57 pm

Tedisco is kind of a hapless fool in this case, as he had a solid lead until the Morons from the RNC and RNCC and whatever wingnut PACs came to town and reminded people just how odious Republicans have become in this country.

inorite? It’s magnificent. They may have salted the earth in that district for years.

It’s like The Producers only without people liking what the crazy racist did.

gjdodger March 31, 2009 at 10:58 pm

John Cornyn says the people of New York’s 20th district will have a congressman in, maybe, 2032.

SayItWithWookies March 31, 2009 at 11:01 pm

With nearly 6,000 absentee ballots that will essentially decide the race as of Monday, the election will not be decided at least until April 13.
I picked the wrong night to run out of pot brownies.

mirrorball March 31, 2009 at 11:09 pm

I’m sure they can fly in Norm Coleman’s lawyers tomorrow. Since, you know, they’ve been doing such a bang up job.

facehead March 31, 2009 at 11:12 pm

Only Ralph Nader can save us now

WadISay March 31, 2009 at 11:12 pm

Somebody must know how the absentee ballots broke in November, anyway. Nate, I’m talkin’ to you. TPM seems to have gone out for a beer.

jagorev March 31, 2009 at 11:13 pm

See, this is what happens when you try your precious Democracy thing, America! Paterson could have appointed Princess Caroline and we would have all been perfectly happy, but that wasn’t good enough for you bastards was it?

prototype March 31, 2009 at 11:17 pm

This would have only been news if Murphy had lost horribly. Then the media could blame it on Obama and say how much everyone hates Muslim socialists and their dirty stimulus money.

cal March 31, 2009 at 11:18 pm

Strip ‘em down and make them wrestle for it!

TimesUp March 31, 2009 at 11:20 pm

[re=278188]jagorev[/re]: And to think, the daughter of Jack Kennedy, damn!

Texan Bulldoggette March 31, 2009 at 11:21 pm

Kos says there’s 5900 absentee military ballots still outstanding. But still…this is all likely to make the MN race seem timely. Ugh…somehow this will be bad for Barry.

Mr Blifil March 31, 2009 at 11:27 pm

But Republicans sure are spunky!

SayItWithWookies March 31, 2009 at 11:28 pm

[re=278190]cal[/re]: Whoever can drink the most milk from a sustainably cloned cow in a minute flat should get the prize. Of course, that might favor the Republican, since they’re better at swallowing…

comradepaulson March 31, 2009 at 11:31 pm

[re=278192]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: No way. This was their one day talking point, had Tabasco Sauce had won tonight. Murphy being up tonight means no blathering about this and how “the country is turning on Barry” tomorrow. At least, no using this as an excuse to blather about how “the country is turning on Barry.” This is a heavy, heavy GOP district.

Daria March 31, 2009 at 11:33 pm

Ken Layne, it is NRCC, not RNCC.

Sorry, pet peeve of mine. :)

answerbird March 31, 2009 at 11:34 pm

I never understand why better known candidates attack unknown challengers. Tedisco had great name recognition and Murphy had moved to the district seven years ago. In rural New York, you don’t lose your newcomer status until the second generation is born there. All Tedisco had to do is not make gaffes, talk about his 20 years of service and not mention Murphy’s name once and he would have won by at least 10 points. Of course he would have locked Steele in the closet until the election was over. Also.

cal March 31, 2009 at 11:39 pm

The RNCC attack ads against Murphy were laughable. “Scott Murphy is like AIG.” Huh?

Texan Bulldoggette March 31, 2009 at 11:40 pm

[re=278199]comradepaulson[/re]: Umm…OT I think I would totally do Murphy. He is one nice looking pol! Also what you said. Also.

expatinOz March 31, 2009 at 11:44 pm

Is it odd that I find Scott Murphy totally hot and want to rub myself all over his dangly bits? I’ve always had a thing for pasty Irish boys and he makes me all tingly in my naughty bits.

expatinOz March 31, 2009 at 11:45 pm

[re=278203]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: Damn it! Jinx.

Texan Bulldoggette March 31, 2009 at 11:49 pm

[re=278206]expatinOz[/re]: You said it better. We, in the American south, don’t like to refer to our ‘naughty bits.’ I don’t think we’re allowed to have any of those things much less use them or know they exist!

sarcasticusername March 31, 2009 at 11:50 pm

[re=278189]prototype[/re]: i’m pretty sure that’ll still be the takeaway. republican talking points > reality. always. it’s the law of the beltway.

comradepaulson March 31, 2009 at 11:51 pm

Is it wrong for me to hope that the Lizard People will play the deciding role in this election? Because I always hope that.

Texan Bulldoggette March 31, 2009 at 11:54 pm

[re=278209]comradepaulson[/re]: Let’s keep the damn lizard people contained to MN. Bachmann’s the only person who can keep her people at bay.

Holding Out for a Hero April 1, 2009 at 12:00 am

Can I just laugh myself silly here for a second? Now Tedisco might still win this, BUT, this is a solidly GOP district which has only be dem for 2 years because Rahm persuaded Kristen to run when her hubby said don’t.


angryhippopotamus April 1, 2009 at 12:06 am

When did 344-279 stop equaling 65? WHY WAS I NOT INFORMED?!?! also, its the new york 20th, who gives a shit?

Lascauxcaveman April 1, 2009 at 12:22 am

[re=278183]gjdodger[/re]: Haha! You’ve been paying attention these past few days, haven’t you?

Also, that Murphy guy looks like that guy in the Chris Buckley “Smoking” movie, which I’m guessing was funny, because the book really was. So, he wins. That’s how it works, right?

OK, Teh Disco guy kinda looks like a senior update of Eugene Levy, so also funny, FTW. This is why it’s such a close race. SCTV vs. “Thank You For Smoking.”

DC Hates Me April 1, 2009 at 12:24 am

This would be an interesting race if either of the candidates was remotely interesting. I’m declaring victory for Conficker Worm.

expatinOz April 1, 2009 at 12:28 am

[re=278207]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: Thanks, I grew up in the American South (born in Virginia, god help me, and then grew up in Florida) and one of my favourites things about having moved overseas is having far more opportunities to say “naughty bits” and “dangly bits.” I used to just have to practice at home in the mirror.

Jukesgrrl April 1, 2009 at 12:29 am

[re=278185]mirrorball[/re]: I don’t think there’s enough money in District 20 to pay Coleman’s lawyers. There wasn’t enough money in all of Minnesota to pay Coleman’s lawyers.

[re=278201]answerbird[/re]: “Tedisco had great name recognition” AND and a 70,000-vote lead given Republican registration in the District. Who was too depressed to get out of bed today??

[re=278209]comradepaulson[/re]: Maybe the Lizard People are the source of all those absentee ballots.

El Pinche April 1, 2009 at 12:37 am


SUPPORT AMEROS OR DIE!!@!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

slinkimalinki April 1, 2009 at 12:39 am

i’m really sleep deprived and that headline somehow resolved itself into something like “tedisco and murphy found dead, tied to bed together”. which doesn’t make sense on any level.

El Pinche April 1, 2009 at 12:39 am

[re=278202]cal[/re]: It works on the Hannites and Rusholoids.

El Pinche April 1, 2009 at 12:42 am

Somehow I think Coleman is calling Tedisco giving him some pointers and maybe making some suggestions on good attorneys.

2druk2phluq April 1, 2009 at 12:43 am

So there I was, editing a page of Encyclopedia Dramatica, when it suddenly struck me that some of the writing seemed terribly familiar. I knew that it wasn’t just the liquified mudkipp and gin concoction, because that only made me see colors. No, this was a sense of deja vu. There was an emo girl there, and you were there, and you were there, and you were there too.

Needless to say, I went off in search of some truck nutz in order to stir up zee spinning nut-wingery fayle that we have all grown to love so much.

Lascauxcaveman April 1, 2009 at 12:45 am

[re=278226]El Pinche[/re]: Say, I didn’t know you spoke caveman. I shall invite you to a friendly chatroom.

lulzmonger April 1, 2009 at 12:45 am

I sense a disturbance in The Force – a sound like legions of lawyers rubbing their hands & salivating.

Other places have runoff elections … America has lawsuits.

zenferret April 1, 2009 at 12:46 am

What a surprise…

NewsMax has declared it a major defeat for Obama that The Democrat didn’t exceed expectations and have a crushing victory. It was afterall a Democratic leaning district they sez..

So who is blowing whose what to make up shit like that?

Dead Heat in NY Congressional Race, But Obama Undermined
The two candidates in a New York congressional special election viewed as a referendum on the Obama administration are separated by just 65 votes with thousands of absentee ballots yet to be counted. But one clear loser has emerged: a president whose popularity was put on the line to support the Democratic candidate in a Democrat-leaning district.

chascates April 1, 2009 at 12:48 am

So what’s NY law on this close of an election? Automatic recount I’ll bet but can this drag on for months and months?
And how will FoxNation react?

chascates April 1, 2009 at 12:50 am

[re=278230]Lascauxcaveman[/re]: El Pinche is the ee cummings of all caps.

El Pinche April 1, 2009 at 12:58 am

[re=278230]Lascauxcaveman[/re]: Actually, it’s Frankenstein with a slight Tonto dialect.

Lionel Hutz Esq. April 1, 2009 at 12:59 am

Aren’t we all missing the obvious answer: Norm Coleman should be declared the new Congressman for New York 20.

KristaJulieva April 1, 2009 at 1:02 am

The electorate have spoken! They have shrugged their shoulders and gone back to scanning the pavement for cans that can be exchanged for a few cents at the recycling center.

TexasCowGirl April 1, 2009 at 1:21 am

[re=278232]zenferret[/re]: They need to check the new poll numbers from the Wash Post. No one believes anything they say except for the 25% of the country that though Bush was doing a good job.

TexasCowGirl April 1, 2009 at 1:22 am

[re=278192]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: Don’t you mean this will be good for John McCain?

Lionel Hutz Esq. April 1, 2009 at 1:33 am

At least we can all agree that Rush Limbaugh is a druggy sex freak that hurts Republicans. There is solace in that.

Lascauxcaveman April 1, 2009 at 1:38 am

[re=278237]El Pinche[/re]: Had you revealed yourself before Xmas, I would have requested a rendition of “Silent Night.”

CollegeStudent April 1, 2009 at 1:55 am

[re=278209]comradepaulson[/re]: [re=278210]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: The way I see it, the Lizard people are 2 for 2 with this shit. They can’t be stopped, there will never be another decided election in America. While we’re tied up in court forever, the Lizard People will take over the country.
We’re all doomed and its all Norm Coleman’s fault.

El Pinche April 1, 2009 at 2:55 am

[re=278244]Lascauxcaveman[/re]: Yeah, I was thinking of that skit when I wrote that original comment (thinking of phil hartman) . haha.

El Pinche April 1, 2009 at 3:04 am

[re=278232]zenferret[/re]: Newsmax, the all caps news source.

My office mate was a crazy mormon who used to read that shit to me everyday. ” Take a look at this! Al Queda is working with illegal immigrants in Juarez. They’re building tunnels . They found C 4!!! ”

Ten minutes later the story is completely gone from the site. So all day he mumbled about illegals and terrorism. Newsmax works!

shortsshortsshorts April 1, 2009 at 3:35 am

Hello everyone. Wuz gon ovur teh weakend, jus droove ein. wuts a republican?

Beef Supreme April 1, 2009 at 3:38 am

Goddammit! I missed the Mythbusters guys on Olbermann!

chascates April 1, 2009 at 4:04 am

[re=278255]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: What manner of back country deviltry did you partake of?

shortsshortsshorts April 1, 2009 at 4:07 am

[re=278259]chascates[/re]: Mainly prosthetic bullshit, with signs of ophthalmology, entomology, and Jesus.

Lionel Hutz Esq. April 1, 2009 at 4:12 am

[re=278255]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: I was gone for the weekend too. From a quick google search, a Republican is a white male from the South that enjoys sex with boys or prostitutes or wearing a diaper (or a combination of either or all of the above) while snorting Oxycontin and who’s answer to any problems is to cut taxes for corporations and the wealthy while telling people who have real problems to “pull up their boot straps,” which appears to be related to some sort of humiliating S&M and/or furry sex act.

Also, whenever a “Republican” says they don’t like the President, you can be pretty sure that means they don’t like black people. Or articulate people. Or people that believe the Earth is over 4000 years old. Or who make decisions based upon facts. Also.

trondant April 1, 2009 at 4:32 am

[re=278195]Mr Blifil[/re]: I never thought about a career as a makeup artist, but now that you mention it? Aw yeah.

trondant April 1, 2009 at 4:34 am

[re=278255]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: It’s a place where fruit flies take off and land, but that’s not important right now.

Serolf Divad April 1, 2009 at 5:26 am

So at poll closing and before the coma inducing hand re-count, the Democrat in the heavily Republican district was ahead? Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha! I’d call that a victory right there.

Where’s your God now, GOP maroons? I’ll tell you where: in the White House.

Suck it!!!!

chascates April 1, 2009 at 5:40 am

The British paper Telegraph is liveblogging the G20 summit with our Barry and all those foreigners:

loquaciousmusic April 1, 2009 at 6:44 am

Mommy, is this what that sweaty, fat man meant by a “hundred-year majority”?

AngryBlakGuy April 1, 2009 at 7:21 am

…well before I get to the snark, this isn’t going to turn out like the MN race for one reason. In congress the Rethuglicans realize they are hopelessly outnumbered and the loss/gain of single seat wont make much of a difference. Contrast this with the Rethuglicans molecule thin ability to filibuster in the senate. I just don’t see them being willing to dump the same kind of cash(post election) into a meaningless congressional race just to prolong the inevitable.

AngryBlakGuy April 1, 2009 at 7:25 am

…don’t worry everyone this is ALL part of Michael Steele’s plan, remember?!

Dr Tobias Funke April 1, 2009 at 8:01 am

Reason # 2178921374eswajrhfd12 Why Newspapers are failing-

On the Albany Times frontpage, one of their featured stories is about… what kinda of limo to take to prom! (One with a mini bar / flat surfaces to do lines of prescription drugs, etc)

chascates April 1, 2009 at 8:04 am

And Atty Gen. Eric Holder said he’d drop the charges against former Sen. Ted Stevens!


thebaker April 1, 2009 at 8:09 am

[re=278274]chascates[/re]: and tweety finally received tonsorial attention

thebaker April 1, 2009 at 8:10 am


bitchincamaro April 1, 2009 at 8:12 am

[re=278275]thebaker[/re]: I thought so, but you’ve confirmed it. Less Tweety, but the same Foghorn Leghorn.

Josh Fruhlinger April 1, 2009 at 8:28 am

Is it just me or are those two guys the two most tooltastic tools ever?

bitchincamaro April 1, 2009 at 8:48 am

[re=278279]Josh Fruhlinger[/re]: Yes.

queeraselvis v 2.0 April 1, 2009 at 9:06 am

[re=278279]Josh Fruhlinger[/re]: It’s not just you.

Btw, I told y’all that it would be a toss-up between Zombie Kissinger and John Tesh Lite. Thanks, NY 20th, for confirming it.

Sussemilch April 1, 2009 at 9:50 am

I don’t know who’s who in that photo, but the guy on the right looks like he wants to tear out my liver with his teeth.

President Beeblebrox April 1, 2009 at 10:27 am

As TPM pointed out: if Tedisco wins, Tedisco wins, but if Murphy wins, Tedisco is still going to try to pull out a win because the NY GOP filed a petition for writ of mandamus or something like that BEFORE the polls closed. WTF?

zenferret April 1, 2009 at 10:58 am

[re=278320]President Beeblebrox[/re]: A tite old man’s anus?

Beltway Bully April 1, 2009 at 11:41 am

Are they wearing the same suit and tie?

omigawd CALL EACH OTHER before running for office, srsly, Also.

Lionel Hutz Esq. April 1, 2009 at 11:44 am

Best April Fool’s Joke Ever!

President Beeblebrox April 1, 2009 at 12:05 pm

[re=278232]zenferret[/re]: NewsMax reminds me of The Onion but without the irony. Or Weekly World News without the photos of Bat-Boy.

Capricatony April 1, 2009 at 12:11 pm

Dems should really stop stealing elections by running in them and winning.

Accordion-o-rama April 1, 2009 at 12:39 pm

[re=278195]Mr Blifil[/re]: Sniff, sniff … Confirmed!

mattym April 1, 2009 at 12:41 pm

Red State is Crying!!!

That’s what you get for destroying the environment.

President Beeblebrox April 1, 2009 at 1:09 pm

“My friends, we’ve got them just where we want them.”

- John McCain, October 18, 2008

President Beeblebrox April 1, 2009 at 1:18 pm

Harrrr, the ground is shifting and it’s all Barry’s fault!

“Everybody knows that the Democrats would have won this race easily if it were held last November, in a district President Obama won and the Democrat congressional candidate carried with 62 percent of the vote,” said Curt Anderson, a consultant to the RNC. “The ground is clearly shifting. The Murphy campaign staked everything on the President and his economic policies and the chances are quite good that they will lose when all the ballots are counted.”

getoffmylawn April 1, 2009 at 7:31 pm

How can there be 6,000 absentee ballots here in the 20th CD? Those ballots were given out to every moose we saw…but not 6,000! I’ll bet some flunky gave them to the bears as well. I hope these two guys wind up in a dead heat and we’ll have another special election – where Ted Stevens will run ’cause he’s moving here to the North Country – and it will be a landslide my friends, a landslide.

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