• May 26, 2012
'E-CONOMICS'

March 30, 2009

Fox News Launches Exciting New Online Internet Venture

by Jim Newell  

The Fox News channel today launched FoxNation.com, a yiff site. No silly it is the Huffington Post of the right! The sites even have the same design scheme, “Unreadable.” Expect Fox Nation to be… very very popular and successful. Really. And such an auspicious start today! Bill O’Reilly self-promo, a little 9/11 action, mmm that sounds good, WE’LL HAVE THAT. [FoxNation]

{ 154 comments }

Hooray For Anything March 30, 2009 at 6:00 pm

Yay, it’s a Rupert Murdoch owned web site for a Rupert Murdoch owned news channel that’s promoting editorials in a Rupert Murdoch owned newspaper. The Circle of Wingnuttery is complete

Gurkman March 30, 2009 at 6:00 pm

will the wingnuts set up a Daily Beast too?

V572625694 March 30, 2009 at 6:01 pm

I especially like “Easter bunnies caught in PETA crosshairs.”

As for readability, I’d put it slightly ahead of HuffPost, and not as ugly and derivative as Politico.

Texan Bulldoggette March 30, 2009 at 6:01 pm

I’m putting this in my ‘who the fuck cares?’ file.

Accordion-o-rama March 30, 2009 at 6:01 pm

Conspiracy theories and sex offender outrage-a-thons. I somehow sense the target demographic…

Tommmcatt March 30, 2009 at 6:02 pm

Ewwwww, is that a sweatsock with lotion in it? Next to a picture of O’Reilley? Ewwww!

Crab1 March 30, 2009 at 6:02 pm

This replaces bikerfox.com as the least necessary use of internet.

ph7 March 30, 2009 at 6:03 pm

Those old, angry white men are just getting the hang of their AM radios. Now they have to figure out which direction to move their TV antennas to get FoxNation picture radio.

Serolf Divad March 30, 2009 at 6:03 pm

Is this for real? That site makes World Net Daily seem positively tame… and sane.

ManchuCandidate March 30, 2009 at 6:04 pm

Wow, a Faux Opinion Site. It’s, it’s, it’s so, er, original?

Just like all the other Faux Newz properties. Opinion and rigid FAIL wingnutty ideology pretending to be real newz. Huffpo is grating at times, but there are actually people whose opinions I like to read there.

Unless Faux decides to put up XXX nude lezzie pics of the “blond” newz anchor females (so we can find out who is really blond unless they cheat like Playboy) then I’m not interested.

Tra March 30, 2009 at 6:05 pm

How incompetent do you have to be to make a picture of a collapsing building completely incomprehensible? I just spent the past 40 or so seconds wondering why I was looking at picture of some kind of giant chicken.

SayItWithWookies March 30, 2009 at 6:07 pm

[re=276958]Tra[/re]: That would be the picture on the right.

Gurkman March 30, 2009 at 6:07 pm

i’d like to see a wingnut nudie shoot. all those large homosphobic bodies rubbing against each other.

SayItWithWookies March 30, 2009 at 6:09 pm

TheFoxNation.com: “Making Matt Drudge look like an innovative web designer since March 29, 2009.”

Jukesgrrl March 30, 2009 at 6:09 pm

They had so many opinions that just wouldn’t fit on Twitter.

[re=276958]Tra[/re]: I thought it was a St. Bernard getting a bath.

Mr Blifil March 30, 2009 at 6:09 pm

“The Fox Nation was created for people who believe in the United States of America and its ideals, as expressed in the Constitution, the Declaration of Independence, and the Emancipation Proclamation.”

The rest of all y’all libtards can fuck the fuck off.

comradepaulson March 30, 2009 at 6:10 pm

Is this website part of a government bailout program for Wonkette and Sadly, No?

Internally valid March 30, 2009 at 6:13 pm

[re=276958]Tra[/re]: I was pretty sure it was a sloth, so I Lol’d. Then, I realized what it was and I stopped Loling. Then I posted this. Then I got drunk, in the future. The end!

Fox n Fiends March 30, 2009 at 6:13 pm

echo echo echo echo echo echo echo echo

chascates March 30, 2009 at 6:14 pm

“Scary! Obama nominee wants one world order
Judges should interpret the Constitution according to other nations’ legal “norms.” Sharia law could apply to disputes in US courts. The United States constitutes an “axis of disobedience” along with North Korea and Saddam-era Iraq.”

OH NOES!

AngryBlakGuy March 30, 2009 at 6:14 pm

…isn’t saying “Fox Opinion Site” redundant? Kinda like saying “shit stinks” or “Republican cock gobbler”?

BklynIlluminati March 30, 2009 at 6:14 pm

Yiff-tastic goodness for all!!

Tommmcatt March 30, 2009 at 6:15 pm

[re=276958]Tra[/re]:

Oh, Jesus, a building! Now I see it. I can’t tell you how relieved I am.

AngryBlakGuy March 30, 2009 at 6:17 pm

…frankly I’m surprised the entire site isn’t composed of 90′s era HTML layouts and typed in all caps!

El Pinche March 30, 2009 at 6:23 pm

FoxNation = Half Hour Comedy Hour
Sorry folks, I give this unintentional comedic masterpiece about 3-4 months.

V572625694 March 30, 2009 at 6:23 pm

“The Fox Nation was created for people who believe in the United States of America and its ideals, as expressed in the Constitution, the Declaration of Independence, and the Emancipation Proclamation.”

But nor for people who believe in the Taft-Hartley Act, the National Environmental Protection Act, or the 14th Amendment. Cuz Fox viewers get to pick and choose the laws they’ll obey.

SayItWithWookies March 30, 2009 at 6:24 pm

[re=276985]V572625694[/re]: Don’t forget Glass-Steagall.

El Pinche March 30, 2009 at 6:25 pm

[re=276973]AngryBlakGuy[/re]: haha , win.

itgetter March 30, 2009 at 6:28 pm

Have any wonketteers started trolling in the comments yet? Shorts?

grevillea March 30, 2009 at 6:33 pm

Now is there some way we can put virtual barbed wire around it, to keep all its readers from infesting the rest of the web? Although that would dramatically reduce readership for Ken’s AOL columns…

chascates March 30, 2009 at 6:41 pm

[re=276994]itgetter[/re]: I tried but it didn’t take. I’ll give it another shot.

NoWireHangers March 30, 2009 at 6:42 pm

So they’re not even trying to appear neutral anymore, they’re just letting their conservative nuts hang right out. I seriously hope this means that the “Liberal Media” stops leaning to the Right in an attempt to appear “neutral”. If CBS, ABC, and NBC are by no means the liberal equivalent of FOX. There is no liberal equivalent–maybe MSNBC. It’s unfortunate because people think if networks as “respectable” news sources, when FOX is nothing but lukewarm mouth water from mouth breathers.

Servo March 30, 2009 at 6:43 pm

No GretaWire for me, thanks. Unless it’s something I can use to slice through Karl Rove’s provolone neck.

loudmouthredhead March 30, 2009 at 6:46 pm

Based on the supposed audience of Fox, does “kin” mean “may” or “can”, or does it mean “relatives”?

chascates March 30, 2009 at 6:46 pm

One of us got through. Note the Lizard People comment on ‘Scary! Obama nominee wants one world order.

loudmouthredhead March 30, 2009 at 6:47 pm

[re=277004]Servo[/re]: Greta…late night. Me-yow!

Min March 30, 2009 at 6:47 pm

Which of Bill’s “segments” are the sex offenders protesting?

loudmouthredhead March 30, 2009 at 6:50 pm

[re=276971]Fox n Fiends[/re]: The echo chamber has thus been upgraded into the resonant brain goo-ifier 3000… corrupter of souls, destroyer of sanity, etc etc.

loudmouthredhead March 30, 2009 at 6:51 pm

Bill mentions NAMBLA so often you’d think he founded it.

Litlebritdifrnt March 30, 2009 at 6:52 pm

You know if someone was bored and wanted to have a little laugh at someone elses expense then someone *could* you know go to the Oily Titz petition to indict everyone but Nancy Pelosi’s cat site and you know, oh whatever, leave a comment using a silly name, cause they were bored or something, but then totally and utterly well, screw up said Queen of Birfdom’s petition, cause you know they were bored or something. Not saying that I would ever do something like that, but you know, someone COULD do such a thing as sign the petition Angus McCoatup or something.

http://www.ipetitions.com/petition/RedressofGrievances/signatures-22.html

Oh and blogwar also.

monthlykos March 30, 2009 at 6:55 pm

I like the nice big pair of breasts on the side. Keep that stuff coming Rupert, it sells. Also the comments are amusing in a car-crash kind of way. “all the Dems can do is stirrup trouble” Wow, I’d like to set Greta in some “stirrup trouble” with Sarah Palin. Also.

Custerwolf March 30, 2009 at 6:56 pm

Yup -the easter bunnie thing pretty much sums up their level of discourse.

Hooray For Anything March 30, 2009 at 6:56 pm

[re=276972]chascates[/re]: There’s also the great story about how the White House is starting an “Affirmative Action” program to get muslims into the White House! And there’s a story about Bill Ayers.

It’s like Sean Hannity puked up a web site.

Clancy_Pants March 30, 2009 at 6:56 pm

The comments are like a Craig’s list of Asshats. It’s going to be great to have a central depot for the intellectual diarrhea coming from the shit-for-brains, W’s-revisionist-historian, butt munching clowns.

Kev-O-Tron March 30, 2009 at 6:57 pm

[re=276994]itgetter[/re]: Oh to be a moderator when the day comes for 300 brave Wonkette smart assess to do battle with the FoxNation of idiots.

Custerwolf March 30, 2009 at 6:58 pm

[re=277014]monthlykos[/re]: “I like the nice big pair of breasts on the side.”
They’re gonna need some Gretawire stat.

grevillea March 30, 2009 at 7:02 pm

[re=277018]Kev-O-Tron[/re]: This is Sparta!

June Cleaver 2.0 March 30, 2009 at 7:05 pm

[re=276947]V572625694[/re]: I love the Huffington Post. It’s so busy-body gossipy and liberal. The articles soothe me when I’m angry. Plus the slideshows are great. Michelle has great flat shoes, hairstyles, and facial expressions. Not to mention Sasha’s sassy sunshades. Huffington Post is my junk food, and I don’t get fat.

chascates March 30, 2009 at 7:08 pm

[re=277016]Hooray For Anything[/re]: World Net Daily has a poll on the Muslim in govt issue:
http://forums.wnd.com/index.php?fa=PAGE.view&pageId=375

One of the best:
“Can you imagine Bush recruiting Baptists or Jews to fill posts? The press would have pilloried him”

Actually, I think he recruited the hell out of Baptists and neocon Jews.

prototype March 30, 2009 at 7:09 pm

Bill Ayers is on the FRONT PAGE. I love that site already. Bookmarked. Will visit again.

momus March 30, 2009 at 7:09 pm

The National Lampoon is BACK! Hooray

wheelie March 30, 2009 at 7:14 pm

Gah. I mistakenly read it all the way across:
“9/11 victims’ kin seek O’Reilly segment
Release of secret docs spark sex offender protest”.

Actually, those are equally plausible headlines.

chascates March 30, 2009 at 7:17 pm

Now I can’t even get the site to load. The Fox brand draws people like moths to flames.

Crab1 March 30, 2009 at 7:27 pm

Tyranny! The comments are MODERATED! Dr. Gaylord P. Winklepicker is being silenced at Fox Nation!

Darkness March 30, 2009 at 7:28 pm

Apparently they decided to host it on an old trash-80. What is it about the right and technology that makes them get along so hopelessly?

Hooray For Anything March 30, 2009 at 7:30 pm

[re=277029]chascates[/re]: Ha! Who do they think ran the damn Bush White House, snake handlers? This does, however, prove that Obama wants us to turn us into an Islamic Caliphate where Sharia law rules the land (which the site also says will happen).

[re=277031]prototype[/re]: Damnit, where’s ACORN? It’s like as the site is new, they haven’t been able to go into full retard mode yet.

Bruno March 30, 2009 at 7:32 pm

[re=276966]Jukesgrrl[/re]: This whole thing will die a grizzly death until: (1) Twitter increases the number of characters allowed per post or (2) Rupert buys Twitter*

*which I suspect is the real reason behind positioning Twitter as a friend of the conservatives = News Corp buyout at crazy valuation

Litlebritdifrnt March 30, 2009 at 7:33 pm

Re Oily Titz – thank you Wonketters you have not let me down.

chascates March 30, 2009 at 7:35 pm

[re=277045]Crab1[/re]: Ann’s Adams Apple is also silenced.
This is not democracy.

Roll Fish March 30, 2009 at 7:36 pm

god how are there 733 comments on that awful fucking “One World Order” article that is a full 3 sentences long?

Bruno March 30, 2009 at 7:37 pm

It’s amusing they put their talking heads under a banner that says “Featured Talent”. That is fair & balanced certainly

Custerwolf March 30, 2009 at 7:40 pm

[re=277049]Bruno[/re]: Unless you were referring to a Timothy Treadwell-type demise, I think you meant ‘grisly.’

davitydave March 30, 2009 at 7:46 pm

The site is down.

Iz FAIL or iz WIN?

Roll Fish March 30, 2009 at 7:46 pm

well shit now the site won’t even load did we break it?

Custerwolf March 30, 2009 at 7:49 pm

I see they’ve brought out the tits in full force. Chick with big tits stuffs beef in her mouth – that’s good. Girls gone wild – check. Gorgeous Angie Jolie (jealous of course of the breeder who keeps her pre-”me”s in the freezer) – who they hate cause she’s lib, but who still wish to fuck her. Yep, I’d say their site is loser ready.
You know I’m just sitting here thinking what an incredibly stoopid line that was about PETA having easter bunnies in their “crosshairs.” Do they not realize that PETA is the group WITHOUT the guns?
Maybe they meant to say “cross hares.”? Can I kill them anyway?

Custerwolf March 30, 2009 at 7:52 pm

[re=277063]Roll Fish[/re]: Did you click on the site that’s in parenthesis (the second link)? I was able to get there just fine – my loss, I know.

Colander March 30, 2009 at 7:56 pm

David Assman is featured prominently, so this is a successful launch.

rocktonsammy March 30, 2009 at 7:57 pm

Thank God Almighty,

The world is safer with these people in front of their computer while their pants down to there ankles off the street.

President Beeblebrox March 30, 2009 at 7:57 pm

[re=276967]Mr Blifil[/re]: Are they including that 3/5 of a person clause thingy?

So much Republican fail today. I’m still getting over the nice LA Times columnist telling me that all I have to do is listen to Limpballs and I will surely agree with him because he’s never, ever said a mean or racist thing in his life. And because he lurves puppies and turtles and birdies. Also.

http://www.latimes.com/news/opinion/commentary/la-oe-klavan29-2009mar29,0,5456892.story

Pop Socket March 30, 2009 at 7:58 pm

Their innovative web feature is to automatically convert all comments to ALL CAPS!

cranky March 30, 2009 at 7:58 pm

i hate you, because you make me click things i don’t want to click. you bastards!

cranky March 30, 2009 at 8:01 pm

and by the way, that picture of hannity is one he approved? another indication of a serious lack of self awareness.

Capricatony March 30, 2009 at 8:08 pm

And I thought Free Republic and Drudge were well designed! Shoot y’all Repubs have joined the late 90s.

Custerwolf March 30, 2009 at 8:13 pm

I remember Handsome Gretel from her CourtTV days when she was a staunch defender of O.J. (Of course back then I still thought she was a dude.) She was the Greta pictured on the left.

http://i389.photobucket.com/albums/oo336/brontie2/aaaaa.jpg

chascates March 30, 2009 at 8:13 pm

Fortunately the poster Lizard People is fighting the good fight there.

loudmouthredhead March 30, 2009 at 8:15 pm

[re=277074]cranky[/re]: He looks like he’s taking a VERY satisfying dump. Thank goodness for cropping.

Where is Glen Beck crying or looking at me with teh crayzee eyes ™?

El Pinche March 30, 2009 at 8:18 pm

a real article at FoxNation!!
“Is Obama Too Bright To Be President?”

The Onion is GOING DOWN!!!!

sanantonerose March 30, 2009 at 8:19 pm

I’m loving the comments under Texas textbook debate. They single-handedly make the case against evolution.

Custerwolf March 30, 2009 at 8:39 pm

[re=277090]sanantonerose[/re]: Exactly how many times DID that one dude refer to the “strawman?” Someone should tell the fucker he ain’t in Kansas anymore.

Servo March 30, 2009 at 8:40 pm

looks like Mr. Hannity has another satisfying mouthful of crude protein.

[re=277090]sanantonerose[/re]:
They don’t like evolution because their ancestors have been genetically unable to participate. Kinda like flippin’ the Monopoly board in a rage because, well, you just suck at it.

nmmagayar March 30, 2009 at 8:40 pm

I feel dirty now, but my comments made it up

cranky March 30, 2009 at 8:41 pm

i challenge all wonkettes to submit articles to this site. the first one to offer proof that your spoof was chosen and published there will get a check for a $250 from me, i swear!

JadedDIssonance March 30, 2009 at 8:43 pm

Breitbart is telling the “online” right to unite!

“So now that the right is vanquished and thoroughly out of power, why doesn’t it learn from its conquerors and employ similar [online] tactics?

The answer is obvious. The right, for the most part, embraces basic Judeo-Christian ideals and would not promote nor defend the propaganda techniques that were perfected in godless communist and socialist regimes. The current political and media environment crafted by supposedly idealistic Mr. Obama resembles Hugo Chavez’s Venezuela more than John F. Kennedy’s America. ”

Actually, Sir, the reason for your distress is not an overabundance of morality on the sleeves of the Right, but rather an inability to type in coherent english.

ella March 30, 2009 at 8:49 pm

At least they’ve stopped pretending to be fair and balanced.

chascates March 30, 2009 at 8:50 pm

[re=277097]cranky[/re]: I live in Austin and one of the things I’d like to arrange is an ‘invasion’ of Texas! I need to find out where one of those cameras is down near the border that these wingnuts watch online for those devious illegals a’comin’ up. Then I’ll dress my friends in serapes & sombreros with a couple of ammo belts each. We’ll take our rifles (unloaded) and stream across the border going behind the camera to cross again, making it appear a mighty host is streaming up to retake the Alamo.

Anyone want to join in?

nmmagayar March 30, 2009 at 8:53 pm

[re=277101]chascates[/re]: damn, if you did in in El Paso, I’d be right there – it’s only a 4 hour drive from ABQ – Austin is too damn far

AWOcoholic March 30, 2009 at 8:54 pm

Yesyesyes – There are open comments and a list of “Most talked about” links! This was the VERY FIRST ONE…

“you are chit out of luck if you are a poor white man.. but soon all white men will be in my same boat. so i dont worry on it anymore.. i do know my x black and asian wives and kids would not suffer like i do.. and thats just the facts..

why do i bother to talk.. you folks voted for obamakan.. we will not be a country in 2 years..i do not think we will make it a year.. as with what the russians said.. america will fail this year. and russia says its mostly because of gay men.. ha ha ya just have to love the non western world.. they see the west for what they are..”

Custerwolf March 30, 2009 at 8:55 pm

[re=277098]JadedDIssonance[/re]: “A digital war has broken out,” Breitbart sees everything through the eys of his herpes. As they say, “When all you got is a hammer, everything looks like a nail.”

nmmagayar March 30, 2009 at 9:03 pm

Fuck – all my comments are vanishing now

monthlykos March 30, 2009 at 9:07 pm

[re=277086]loudmouthredhead[/re]: Crazee eyz is right. That phucker’s eyes are scareeeee!

cranky March 30, 2009 at 9:11 pm

[re=277101]chascates[/re]: i’m way too far away! i tend to fear that it would just mean random “mexicans” would be murdered for eyeing some nutbag’s wahf. the whiter your friends, the better. know any tall swedes?

cranky March 30, 2009 at 9:13 pm

[re=277107]monthlykos[/re]: they are actual googley eyes. a modern dr frankenstein animated a mr potato head, then gave him a huge dose of dr jekyl’s special sauce. that is how glen beck “became”.

Hooray For Anything March 30, 2009 at 9:18 pm

[re=277098]JadedDIssonance[/re]: That’s fucking beautiful– “we, on the right, are too Christian to spread lies and hate, unlike our political opponents who are a bunch of Commie dictators who want to take create a socialist regime and enslave us all.”

tiedupinabrooklynbasement March 30, 2009 at 9:21 pm

Im gonna bookmark this new site under “SHTFU!”

Litlebritdifrnt March 30, 2009 at 9:23 pm

Wonketeers – you have turned the Oily Titz petition into a thing of beauty, it is truly spectacular, I thank you.

http://www.ipetitions.com/petition/RedressofGrievances/signatures-25.html

Custerwolf March 30, 2009 at 9:29 pm

I’ve got a sneek peak of their online money management advisor.
http://i389.photobucket.com/albums/oo336/brontie2/moneybags.jpg

Roll Fish March 30, 2009 at 9:37 pm

[re=277112]Hooray For Anything[/re]: that is pure gold right there

DC Hates Me March 30, 2009 at 9:40 pm

Wait .. this FoxWorld thing won’t help the right but hurt the right, as it’s main target is to siphon off Drudge readers, lowering his numbers, fracturing winger unity and confusing their loyalties. Rupert Murdoch is a suicidal genius!

eekahil March 30, 2009 at 9:50 pm

ha ha “FOX” “yiff site”
lulzlolroflomfg!!11!!
wonder what fursonas bill and greta are?!!!!!???

hahaha…uh..huh..uhhh…nevermind.

chascates March 30, 2009 at 9:52 pm

[re=277115]Litlebritdifrnt[/re]: THAT WAS ENJOYABLE.

President Beeblebrox March 30, 2009 at 10:11 pm

[re=277012]Litlebritdifrnt[/re]: Ooo, we’ve not had an ipetitions.com site to vandalise since The Taking of Thank You President Dubyah.

It’s getting hard to tell the joke posts from the srs ones, though, like this anonymous Veteran with strong resolve:

916 Anonymous Signing with strong resolve as a Veteran who swore to uphold the Constitution of the United States of America.

ALL CAPS:

926 Anonymous AMEN,,WE THE PEOPLE,STAND UP PRAY OUR MILITARY HAVE NOT DIED IN VAIN!! HOW CAN THEY EVEN CALL THEMSELVES AMERICANS,THEY SHOULD BE ASHAMED.When more find out the real TRUTH TO LEARN THAT THEIR GOVT HAS DECEIVED THEM,MY,MY STOP THIS MADNESS ASAP!!

Fuck that. Laissez les bon temps roulez!

1109 Bodacious Taitzes My headlights are equipped with hypnotic brassiere from old KGB. Stare into mein bresteses und obey my kommand.

1110 Carol Derbis He has refused to UPHOLD AND DEFEND THE CONSTITUTION OF THE UNITED STATES – to which he took a SOLEMN OATH. For this he is guilty of treason, and SHOULD BE INDICTED WITHOUT FURTHER DELAY!

1111 Dasha Treesohn Yes, how long is a president-whitening session? How much will it cost, and how long before I have to have my president whitened again?

1112 Oily Tranny Get ready for a surprise Justice Roberts!

1144 Mike Hunt Mike Hunt to the rescue !!

1145 Charles Lennon does anyone want to send me naked pictures??? my email is charleslennon@yahoo.com plz,im desperate

1146 IP Freely IP Freely on this petition

1147 Charles Lennon I will not shower until obama is IMPEACHED!

1148 Neil SANKEY I am a secret CIA member that will take down all peewee coffee shops in the next 48 hours

1149 Rudy Brownell i like 4 year old boys.hee hee

tsunami March 30, 2009 at 10:21 pm

Katydid
Obama does not deserve the title of President. He should be standing trial for “Treason”! In 2 1/2 short months he has tried to take this country down!
Are we going to stand silently by and let him tear this Great U.S.A. apart?
You idiots that voted for him should all pack your bags—cause you will need to go back to Kenya with him when he leaves!
To our veterans and fighting men and women currently serving in the U.S. military reading this —-”Thank You , Thank You, Thank You” for your military service, and IF I could , I would give each of you a purple heart because I think each of you deserve it!. GOD BLESS AMERICA

i hear that kenya is nice this time of year so i’ll go, but i wonder…
if katy is giving them purple hearts, is she going to give them wounds, too?

Cranky Old Batt March 30, 2009 at 10:27 pm

[re=276958]Tra[/re]: I thought it was a bad Photoshop of the shadow monster from Inkheart.

Custerwolf March 30, 2009 at 10:27 pm

[re=277134]tsunami[/re]: I don’t think Katy knows what a purple heart is, but I’m sure there are plenty of soldiers out there willing to show her what a big purple veiner is.
BTW – does anyone know which part of the bowel O’Really’s segment will be from?

snarkopolitan March 30, 2009 at 10:29 pm

All right, you mad geniuses have completely destroyed the formatting. The google ads don’t know what to do with themselves.

Good going, George W. Bush, and this time I mean it.

Reefpilot March 30, 2009 at 10:38 pm

I think “katydid” sent in an ireport to CNN. About how she loves muslim rape narratives. And waterboarding. Makes her wet and tingly.

I personally know a couple Iraq vets who’ve been wounded/fucked out of benefits who would love to give little katy a purple heart herself. But one that you don’t recover from.

Internally valid March 30, 2009 at 10:38 pm

[re=277134]tsunami[/re]:

#57: Edward Q. Guerrero: I sign this petition in complete faith that God will endorse this action of mine and those that believe that it is the right thing to do. I cite the Holy Scriptures, Ephesians 6:10-20 as an Armor of God as protection against reprisal from those mentioned on this petition.

Oh NOES! they has teh G-D on their side nao! Curse you Edward Q. Guerrero.

President Beeblebrox March 30, 2009 at 10:50 pm

[re=277144]Internally valid[/re]: Holy crap, this ipetition is becoming epic in scope.

It appears that the good Doktor Orly Taitz, DDS, Esq. is quite a character and is deserving of teh Wonkettes unique take on her, um, qualifications. She’s only marginally less insane than Alan Keyes, her “client”.

O yeah, she has a YouTube channel. She’s got those Bachmann crazy eyes. Wingnuts ahoy! Arrr.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lSL_9Kqo4cE&feature=channel_page

El Pinche March 30, 2009 at 10:55 pm

The story/article turn over rate is as bad as FoxNews when it’s partially retarded.

proudgrampa March 30, 2009 at 10:58 pm

wtf?

peorgietirebiter March 30, 2009 at 11:12 pm

[re=277101]chascates[/re]: I’m north of Dallas so… How about I ship you an old 13″ DC powered monitor/vhs combo with my copy of Viva Max? Prop it up in front of one of the cameras and cover the event from a safe distance.

Colander March 30, 2009 at 11:13 pm

“Bill Maher smears US troops”

They’re getting riled up.

Mr Blifil March 30, 2009 at 11:16 pm

Oh and Glenn Beck was on the cover of the fucking New York Times. Because the cover story on Limbaugh last year in the fucking New York Times magazine, written by a personal friend of Rush, wasn’t quite enough.

El Pinche March 30, 2009 at 11:17 pm

The shift-caps light shines like a beacon in the night, and this one’s for my homies (“GLEN BECK IS GOD”):

http://www.ipetitions.com/petition/RedressofGrievances/signatures-28.html

hoosiermama March 30, 2009 at 11:22 pm

Went to look at the comments section for the ObamaNation dot com and all I can say is that they need more youtube videos of cats playing the piano and baby pandas sneezing, and maybe some lol cats because all those folks need to chill the fuck out, especially the lizard music being.

As of one hour ago, the goatse link was still up, so all’s well.

Bearbloke March 30, 2009 at 11:25 pm

[re=277150]proudgrampa[/re]: Shocking!!1! – do you kiss your grandchild’s forehead with that potty mouth?!!1!??

Bearbloke March 30, 2009 at 11:30 pm

I feel all strange and dizzy from reading about the Great Doctor’s Oily Titz

billorders84 March 30, 2009 at 11:32 pm

I don’t really see the big deal in Fox creating such a website. It is actually refreshing to see a media outlet pursuing the internet rather than ignoring it (newspapers, anyone?).

-billorders84
http://bill84121.blogspot.com

PsycGirl March 30, 2009 at 11:34 pm

[re=277115]Litlebritdifrnt[/re]: I enjoyed the comments by Ken Lay, Jesse Helms, etc. claiming to need ice water.

The Helvetica Scenario March 30, 2009 at 11:36 pm

[re=277165]billorders84[/re]: They may be pursuing it, but they’ll never catch it.

Double Scorpion March 30, 2009 at 11:39 pm

I think they are missing a key demographic.

“Ashton Kutcher gets chest waxed.”

Oh nevermind.

Mr Blifil March 30, 2009 at 11:42 pm

[re=277165]billorders84[/re]: Yes, refreshing, like cool moist air stirring the peach fuzz on a virgin’s supple haunches, to visit the FoxNation is to experience the balm of Gilead.

billorders84 March 30, 2009 at 11:56 pm

[re=277167]The Helvetica Scenario[/re]: LoL.

[re=277170]Mr Blifil[/re]: I REALLY dislike the layout of HuffPo–what I thought to be a pretty standard response to the HuffPo. Why FoxNation felt the need to use the same sort of layout is beyond me. Wouldn’t it make more sense to have a better layout than your main competitor?

-billorders84
http://bill84121.blogspot.com

S.Luggo March 31, 2009 at 12:18 am

FuxNation: An Agitprop version of Huff.
The Bolshevists would be so hot-digitty proud.

Next articles:
1, Fluoridation, Obama Marxists want to steal your god damn teeth.
2. Public libraries: another avenue for Democrat mind control of our beat-generation youngs.
3. Save our Children. The new Beebop race music on the intertubes: The Fifth Dimension; James Taylor.
4. Snazzier Sam Brown belts and more torchlight parades: the new Conservative revival.
5. Kristallnacht: was it really that bad?
6. Persons of color: America’s next Italians? .
7. Anal intercourse: a cure for the teen abortion epidemic or merely an RNC convention “how’d ya do?” Commentary.
8. The Readers Digest: A Radical Venue.

SpecialHorse March 31, 2009 at 1:34 am

I am addicted to FoxNation.com. I can’t stop reading the comments. Their minds work in such odd ways.

stolichnayaaa March 31, 2009 at 1:43 am

The “Business” section on the homepage is delightful.

“Soros slapped with record fine”

“GE slapped with class-action lawsuit”

slapslapslapslap

Fucking Editorial Heroics

El Pinche March 31, 2009 at 1:52 am

[re=277210]SpecialHorse[/re]: Yes, however, they’re minds are better studied by removing and pickling their brains for further analysis.

TGY March 31, 2009 at 3:11 am

Foxyiff? Foxyiffpile? Fiffpile

foog March 31, 2009 at 3:21 am

Julius Irving Tapdancing Christ!! not only is Bill Ayers on the front page, they are using a scary old 60s picture of him! Wheeeee! I am so bookmarking the everlovin shit outta this motherfucker!

SayItWithWookies March 31, 2009 at 3:45 am

I have my heart set on the title “Recycling Causes Cancer, Terrorism.”

hobospacejunkie March 31, 2009 at 3:59 am

They’s having trouble with subject-verb agreement in the headlines:

Democratic Iowa State senators apologizes for using the ‘N’ word

Plus the link is broken. Great start FOX, you fucking morans.

hobospacejunkie March 31, 2009 at 4:08 am

Oh Jesus Christ on a Pogo Stick sodomizing a gopher!

Not ‘lovin’ it,’ he shots up McDonald’s drive-through

Rush says Hillary twice the man Obama

Twice the man Obama what? While I admire those of you who can read the comments for grins I’m afraid you’re made of sterner (sterno?) stuff than I.

zhubajie March 31, 2009 at 5:36 am

[re=277046]Darkness[/re]: Because they are afraid of anything new!

Zhu Bajie

Naked Bunny with a Whip March 31, 2009 at 7:06 am

“The Fox Nation was created for people who believe in the United States of America and its ideals, as expressed in the Constitution, the Declaration of Independence, and the Emancipation Proclamation.”

…but have never read any of them, nor know when they were written and signed, much less anything about the history surrounding them or the personalities involved in their creations. Now, back to O’Reilly’s latest pompous bloviations.

cosmicboy March 31, 2009 at 7:28 am

This site is gold, Jerry!!!! Gold!!!!!!

Grover Norquist- ” I believe that FOX Nation has the potential to do for the internet what FOX News did to cable television” (Insert Comment Here)

“FOX Nation itself takes no position on issues- although unlike so many other web portals, FOX Nation, does begin with the presumption that America is a special and unique place, a blessed land to be treasured and defended.” – especially with articles titled “NBC is ‘green’ because no one watches”, “Scary! Obama nominee wants one world order”, and “Why the Democrat’s can’t govern”, Yep, no positions on issues taken here. Move along now

tootsieroll March 31, 2009 at 8:01 am

How did you guys miss this one???:

“CNN Reporter Arrested for Climbing on Dyke”.

This is supposed to be a serious site right? Not parody?

tootsieroll March 31, 2009 at 8:20 am

Ok. This site makes we weep. Twenty + pages of people who SRSLY think Obama is defiling the Constitution and plans to take over the government. And that’s only ONE article. HOW? WHY? Are they that stupid, or is it just the blind ignorance and racism? They can’t admit they are racists so they conjure up this wave of injustice to ride on? Good grief.

Hold me.

Johnetic March 31, 2009 at 8:44 am

Here is my favorite – Obama is too smart to be president, says Fox News Marketing Expert.

[http://foxforum.blogs.foxnews.com/2009/03/30/tantillo_obama_carter/]

They are so right. Smart people should not be president, and certainly should not demonstrate as much by stringing together complete, coherent sentences, or showing general understanding of the complex problems that a president may have to face. it makes the rest of us mouth breathers feel sad. Think about the children!

Internally valid March 31, 2009 at 9:32 am

[re=277263]Johnetic[/re]: I defy them to find the clause in the constitution that says the president is allowed to has a smart. THEY CAN”T DO IT!

JadedDIssonance March 31, 2009 at 9:48 am

[re=277157]El Pinche[/re]: a little further below that, a blast from our PUMAPAST:

“1394 riverdaughter There is no censorship here.”

Traveler March 31, 2009 at 9:54 am

[re=277261]tootsieroll[/re]: I choose All of the above.
It is (Stupid * Racisim) + (zenophobia * mob psychology).

PsycGirl March 31, 2009 at 10:02 am

[re=277170]Mr Blifil[/re]: Sarcasm win!

Eclectablog March 31, 2009 at 10:46 am

BrowserFail: The site crashed my browser. Why doesn’t that surprise me?

VanArsdale March 31, 2009 at 10:51 am

Well, don’t waste your time trying to add any comments on this site; as an experiment, I added 2 posts in different subjects. They’ve already been deleted. A la George Orwell; O’Reilly has been known to sanitize his own website. They can’t handle any dispute.

momus March 31, 2009 at 11:20 am

This was an April Fools joke that went seriously awry.

President Beeblebrox March 31, 2009 at 11:29 am

[re=277157]El Pinche[/re]: The wingnutz are outnumbering us with weird comments. Come on, Wonketteers, do us proud and let us know what Trugh Knutes, Esq. and Harry Balzac have to say about our COMMUNIST MUSLIN INDONESIAN PREZNIT!!!1

http://www.ipetitions.com/petition/RedressofGrievances/index.html

bakeneko March 31, 2009 at 1:08 pm

[re=276950]Tommmcatt[/re]: Giant loofah.

stolichnayaaa March 31, 2009 at 3:33 pm

They’re culling comments, but apparently the names aren’t being scrutinized as closely.

A representative selection, which made me giggle muchly:

1402 Mrs. Gingrich No, not that one. The other one.
1403 Peter Brady I was a hallmonitor, I should know!
1404 Bobby Brady Wha?
1405 Carol Brady
1406 Mike Brady because where ever you go, there you are
1407 Not Sure
1409 Erica Kane
1410 Defend R. Condomsdotorg I freely support your effort to defend the fine upstanding members of our country.
1411 Elwood Blues
1412 Mr Brady
1413 Jake Blues
1414 Timothy McVeigh
1415 Charlton Heston
1416 Sneezehard McBumblesnatch achoo!
1417 David L. Rodden, Jr.
1418 Ernesto “Che” Clitwhistle Viva la revolucion!
1419 Merriam Webster What is with you birfers anyway? What have you done to my words? Can none of you spell at all?
1420 Dennis Jackson Barak Obama is nothing but an anchor baby and not entitled to Natural Born status.
1421 Buttpolish Von Scrotegobbler Hear, Hear
1422 Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho I b prezident 4 life suckaaaaa
1423 Ronald Reagan Mr. Gorbachev, put it back! Put it back! Too late. Sigh. I miss jelly beans.
1424 Boutros Boutros Fartwallop I agree
1425 dedender
1426 Upgrayedd
1427 Corazon Magsaysay
1428 The Association of Financial & Insurance CEOs You know why!
1429 Ronald Reagan The green ones. I liked the green ones, you know, with the pink centers?
1431 Romanes eunt domus
1432 Romani ite domum
1434 Col Nathan R. Jessup
1437 Donald Trump
1438 Dash Riprock
1440 Big McLargehuge
1441 Albert Vögler
1442 Stump Beefknob
1443 Reef Blastbody
1444 Blast Thickneck
1445 Slake Fistcrunch
1446 Smash Lampjaw
1447 Crud Bonemeal
1448 Flint Ironstag
1449 Pack Blowfist
1450 Punch Rockgroin

President Beeblebrox March 31, 2009 at 6:38 pm

[re=277723]stolichnayaaa[/re]: We’re up to the 1700s and they are culling names and comments now, but not very carefully. For example, one Howard P. Lovecraft just left a commentary on Shub-Niggurath, The Black Goat Of The Woods With A Thousand Young.

Custerwolf March 31, 2009 at 7:01 pm

[re=277723]stolichnayaaa[/re]: My personal fave of that group has got to be Big McLargehuge. Definitely.

President Beeblebrox March 31, 2009 at 7:04 pm

1717 Howard P. Lovecraft Ever Their praises, and abundance to the Black Goat of the Woods. Iä! Shub-Niggurath! The Goat with a Thousand Young!

1719 Cthulhu fhtagn!

1721 Yog-Sothoth is Rising!

1722 REDRESS! YR. INDONESIAN BRITISH MAHOMEDAN PREZNIT NOOOOOBAMA MUST BE REDRESSED! TODAY AMERIKKKA, TOMORROW NOOBAMA WILL NATIONAILIYSE YR. COLLECTIONS OF RUBBERIZED TRUCK-MOUNTED PROSTHETIC TESTICULI!!!1 WAKE UP SHEEPLE!!1

1726 Rule 11 Sanctions Dec 12 2008 Application (08A524) for a stay pending the filing and disposition of a petition for a writ of certiorari, submitted to Justice Kennedy. Dec 17 2008 Application (08A524) denied by Justice Kennedy. Dec 29 2008 Application (08A524) refiled and submitted to The Chief Justice. Jan 7 2009 DISTRIBUTED for Conference of January 23, 2009. Jan 7 2009 Application (08A524) referred to the Court. Jan 13 2009 Suggestion for recusal received from applicant. Jan 22 2009 Supplemental brief of applicant Gail Lightfoot, et al. filed. (Distributed) Jan 26 2009 Application (08A524) denied by the Court.

1727 Please fist Orly!

1728 Please fist Orly! Please consider supporting Dr. Orly Taitz’s effort to expose Barack HUSSEIN Soetero Obama as a citizen of Her Majesty’s Britannic Government by sending a donation of at least 200 Ameros to Dr. Orly Taitz, DDS, Esquire, c/o General Delivery, Wasilla, Alaska 99654. All donations are fully tax-deductible as permitted by United Nations and European Union law.

President Beeblebrox March 31, 2009 at 7:09 pm

Comment 1728 deals with the EPIC FAIL denial of one of Orly’s seveal Supreme Court filings. She got all excited when it was referred to the full Court, which happens with almost EVERY petition for cert filed with the Court, calling it a “full-throated challenge of Barack Obama’s presidential eligibility. “This is Chief Justice Roberts telling the Congress… the other eight Justices, that there is a problem with this election.”

http://www.renewamerica.us/columns/williams/090107

OK, look, I’m a lawyer IRL, srsly, and I find this woman to be a complete fucktard and an insult to our profession. Hell, she’s even an insult to unaccredited California law schools. I hope some judge somewhere banhammers her, hard.

So, what else is a snarky Wonketteer to do than leave trucknutz jokes on her petition site and make cruel fun of her?

President Beeblebrox March 31, 2009 at 7:10 pm

[re=278079]President Beeblebrox[/re]: Er, that’s comment 1726, fucknuts.

stolichnayaaa March 31, 2009 at 7:19 pm

[re=278074]Custerwolf[/re]: I think most of that last string is from the MST3K episode “Space Mutiny” and is kind of an hilarious petition trick which I intend to steal.

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