Wonkette
No real reason for this, but someone sent us a screen shot of this ad for some fellow called the Ass Man and we thought it was comical. Is there anyone in the world who would trust this man’s advice, or take a single word of his seriously? Pronouns, prepositions, it doesn’t matter, they are all lies. We have never seen this channel, the Fox Business one, but can only *imagine* what a Fox version of CNBC would be like. If anyone else sees ads of financial teevee anchors making hilarious claims about populism, please pass them along!
I like the douche-y smirk. He looks like Bush, except dumber.
That pencil necked geek is going to fight for me. I bet he doesn’t even have a shotgun under his bed a night. I’m no fighter, but he’d be down screaming within seconds. But, he is an ass man so maybe its his ploy to get taken down
What’s up with those random numbers above his head. Let’s guess what they mean.
$40.99? Cost of Assman’s shoes?
So, no one else is keeping score on the bailouts? I’ve had enough people fighting for ME by the way.
Check out the pentagram graphic replacement for an apostrophe in the headline. Maybe something he’s a satanist or pagan or something.
Does his producer chase the cars of people who disagree with him? It could be a problem since it seems that nobody agrees about the economy and the streets are very busy, with Hopey still being so popular and all.
What’s his tally board titled?
Shocker vs Taints?
@ Joey Ratz: another picture with its own alt text.
Sometimes it is easy to picture the guys who got the crap beaten out of them every day of grammar school. I’d imagine Mr. Ass Man, along with all the other ass-hats on Fox fit into that catagory (especially the blond guy in the morning).
Bruno: What bothers me more is those larger numbers with three digits after the decimal point. We don’t take kindly to tenths of a cent round these parts.
Everyone knows proctologists are the life of the party.
Hmmm…Ass Man on Fox. Should fit right in with all the ass holes, asses & dumb asses.
I thought Sen. Craig was the Assman?
Fox + News + Business = FAIL
C’mon people - it’s pronounced Aahzmahn. As in, “say Aah so I can put this in your mouth.”
Why would anyone take financial advice from a proctologist?
I don’t like his name. LETS SET HIM ON FIRE.
Check out the douchey Faux Business Happy Hour. Assman and some inexplicable long-haired hippie are the hosts. The horror.
http://www.foxbusiness.com/our-team/on-air/index.html
Fox, the network that just keeps on giving. Where would we get our laffs if it were not for this Ass Man and others like him?
Hmmm…this business channel smells like ass.
Texan Bulldoggette: Along with Steve Doucey, Fox is finally making explicit what was once implicit. I’m sure the next big Fox hire will be Robert Retardo.
Why is Fox stealing the graphics and fonts from Cash 4 Gold ads?
Who’s ‘youi?’
I thought this was a Master P album for a second.
he needs to sASShay away.
Texan Bulldoggette: And asshats. And ass-wipes. And ass-monkeys. And ass-tards.
shortsshortsshorts: Haha. Yeah!
Yeah, it’s amazing. No one else is even paying ATTENTION to the bailouts, let alone keeping score. I sure haven’t heard anything about them recently. Thank FOX for this guy. Alertness like this may never come again in our lifetimes.
Did they just rebrand that Colmes guy?
this is the clown responsible for those endless fairandbalanced “special reports” about the UN oil for food supposed scandal…..taking the seinfeldian concept of a “show about nothing” to new heights
They couldn’t get Bill Titman?
If their financial channel plays as loose and free with the facts as their nooze channel, all of our 401(k) plans are looking at 35% year over year growth; just like we were making progress in Iraq all those years.
Crab1: Because these financial CEOs have their heads up their asses?
bago: They were gonna go with Robbie Childpred, until one of the interns started laughing.
Godot: You’re right, I had given Fox the benefit of the doubt (stupid mistake I know), that those were commas. Maybe though that’s not tenths of a cent but stinky eurotrash that uses dots where Jeebus intended commas to be
shortsshortsshorts:
And then we can put him out with a fire axe. Some fun!
“Assman, Titman and Childpred, Attys at Law: Hey, we’ve seen worse”
Be warned, Obama. The Asman cometh.
americanscandoanything: Remember Kramer’s license plates?
LittlePig: Hey, they can partner with Dewey, Cheetum, and Howe on the class-action.
When the Assman says he’s fighting for me, that’s when I start to worry.
Ass Man and Butt Hair? Seriously, you can’t make this shit up.
First “Ass Man on the Moon”, 1969.
font9a: Making the Rethuglikken upside-down star more commonplace so that it will seem acceptable and harmless while their cloven hooves come down on us.
Is Assman his name or his title?
Aslan?11?!!
JEBUS HAZ COME 2 SEYVE UZ ALL!
assMan + Gingrich chuckle that they both AGREE WITH KRUGMAN tonight!
http://www.foxbusiness.com/video-search/m/22020968/gingrich-let-the-market-decide-the-value.htm
I swear when I glanced at that graphic I thought the line on the bottom was “FISTING FOR YOU!”
America’s Nightly Scoreboard?
This guy’s the only Assman that’s never scored any.
Bailouts!! What bailouts? Am i missing something?
Ass Man? I thought Seinfeld was supposed to imitate life, not the other way around.
I caught a little bit of the first day of Fox Business, a year or so ago. I remember this from their morning show:
Tom Sullivan: Have we compared you to the Coca-Cola sign out there? Is that Coca-Cola red?
Cheryl Casone: It’s my Nancy Reagan red. Actually, I was told it’s my Nancy Reagan red.
That was all I needed to hear.
He’s fighting for ME! With TELEPROMPTRZ!!!11!
The “you” is underlined in case you may be confused about who this “guy” was fighting for. The star in the place of an apostrophe makes him super U.S.A.!
Motorist: Hey the Ass Man’s in town!!!
Kramer You got that right buddy!!!!
Am I the only one who sees this natural connection: When are they going to team up David ASSman with Brenda BUTTner??? “ASSman & BUTTner”!!! It’s got HIT written all over it!!!
I personally only invest with my broker, Rod Johnson. He keeps on top of things for me. He gives me tips I need.
Most FOX and Republican assmen are pitchers. The others, better known as cockmen or b-boys, are catchers.