Wonkette
That Michael Steele, he really is modernizing the Republican Party! You ladies want an abortion? That’s “hip hop” with him! Gays? Hey, not their fault! Rush Limbaugh? Well he’s an ugly clown, but of course Mike is sorry for saying the truth, whoops! Websites? Let’s make them functional! In other words Michael Steele is another Maryland liberal, just as wishy-washy as any Eastern Seaboard cocktail-party Democrat. Some Republicans seem to be very unhappy about him, on the Internet. They’re even throwing out Woody Allen references!
- “In 1983, Woody Allen made the mockumentary film Zelig about a man who longs for approval so badly that he changes to fit the people who are surrounding him. The movie may as well have been written about Michael Steele, who continues to tie himself in knots as part of his effort to reach out to moderates.” [American Spectator]
- “For obvious racial reasons, parallels between President Barack Obama and Steele have been drawn many a time. A more honest depiction, perhaps, would be to that of his loquacious side kick, the wordiest man in Washington — Vice President Joe Biden.” [Red State]
- “I’m done. Michael Steele cannot lead the Republican Party. I don’t want a leader who attacks conservative leaders. I don’t want a leader who smiles and agrees when Republicans are called Nazis. I don’t want a leader who waffles on abortion every time he’s asked about it. That’s not good enough. If this party wants the support of pro-lifers then Michael Steele must go.” [Free Republic]
- “He also may have voted for Jimmy Carter.” [K-Lo]
fork in ‘em
“He also may have voted for Jimmy Carter.”
I believe that particular crime is punishable by death in K-Lo world.
Also.
“We TRIED having a black guy in charge! It just doesn’t work.”
Best RNC Chairman Ever! (Comedy division)
HOLY HELL he is more liberal than Nancy Pelosi, Barack Obama, Hilary Clinton and Guevara combined.
Everybody Sing! “Michael the Magic . . .”
Such a shame. He actually seems like a halfway decent fellow when he isn’t backtracking.
How many polls have to come out showing that Americans hate Rushbo before Freepers stop calling him a conservative “leader”? The man has done nothing but bloviate and alienate. He hasn’t been elected by ANYBODY. You can cut him loose! For realsies!
Jeebus help me if Keith Olbermann ever got called a liberal “leader”. Libruls might make really stupid billboards, but at least we don’t mistake media personalities for actual leaders.
That picture of him they keep showing, I’m pretty sure the right wingers are going to make him kill and eat his dog to show fealty to them.
Well of COURSE Mikey “Call Me Lexington” Steele favours a woman’s right to choose. After he had a massive hit with “Humpty Dance” while fronting Digial Underground, Mikey got massive amounts of poonage and spread his seed indiscriminately. If all those chicks became Mikey’s baby mamas, he wouldn’t have a pot to piss in.
And if the Free Republic storm troopers want to see Mikey go, then - against better judgement - I REALLY want him to stay.
Just keep fisting each other, Repubs, and we’ll clean up the bloodied remnants when y’all’re done.
Best course of action: Meghan McCain for RNC Chair.
republicans = Ouroboros
The snake eating its own tail has swallowed all the way up to the head and is about to disappear in a tiny puff of pink smoke that smells like cotton candy.
My question is, if Steele is really pro-gay, pro-choice, and anti-Rush - wtf is he doing in the GOP to begin with?
shortsshortsshorts: But not more than Comrade Eisenhower with that 80% top tax rate. Also.
A: Woody Allen and Joe Biden’s black love child who voted for Carter and waffled about killing teh babies.
Q: Who is Michael Steele? I’ll take Famous Republican Train Wrecks for $1600 please, Alex.
I was wondering what self-respecting Republican would watch, let alone cite, a Woody Allen movie, and then I realized it was one with Nazis in it and the motivation for a GOPer viewing it in the first place became much clearer.
“For obvious racial reasons, parallels between President Barack Obama and Steele have been drawn many a time.”
I like how BarbinMD over at DKos put it:
“Yes, they’re like twins separated at birth. One is the President of the United States and the leader of the free world - the other? Crawled on his hands and knees to beg forgiveness from a racist radio talk show host. You can hardly tell them apart.”
He do be da man, tho’…
Ah ha ha they’re going to burn the poor man alive, aren’t they? Also, what are these “abortion waffles” and where can I get some?
And Steele was the best of the RNC candidates…
I don’t think we have to worry about lame billboards and the like with the quality of our political opponents being as such.
SO wrong. At what point in the ’80’s would you have ever found a black character in a Woody Allen film?
…this is kinda like watching an old lady fall down some stairs. You kinda feel bad for her, but you just cant stop laughing!
You can see why the GOP is the party of white straight guys - every time they leave their base it turns into a huge failure; Sarah Palin, Michael Steele, Lindsey Graham.
Today we are all abortionists.
JIMMY CARTER!!!??? WTF!
See! Affirmative action doesn’t work.
“If this party wants the support of pro-lifers then Michael Steele must go.”
Otherwise, pro-lifers will…what? Vote Democrat?
Wow! The public reaction to the GOP dumping its one black guy–talk about “fork in it”!
He loves puppies…and aborted fetuses.
Oh, and the butseks.
For obvious racial reasons
Career arc eerily similar to that of Chancey Gardener.
rambone: Nice enough maybe, but gives no outward appearance of being a bright man (though by GOP standards, he’s Steven fucking Hawking…)
I’m sorry, I cannot comment right now. I’m too busy drawing parallels between our mailman and Obama because they are both black, you know.
Scarab: You can see why the GOP is the party of white *closeted* guys. /fixt
“If the republicans want the support of pro-lifers”
Who the hell else are they gonna vote for? Democrats? Hahahahahahaha! You’re stuck with ‘em bitches!
If you’re a pro-choice Republican, then you have to be pro-gay. After all, homosexuals don’t need to have abortions. Problem solved.
That bitch K-Lo. . .she crazy.
Michael Steele stands up and insists that the GOP must reinvigorate itself…
…and is quickly buried under a shower of Zwieback.
Gallowglass: Watch as that comes back to bite you and the entirety of the Republican base throws their support behind Dr. Paultard.
These are DANGEROUS WATERS.
I want to ask the pro-lifer in the third quote what party they would support if not Steele’s Republicans? Would they really waste time creating their own pro-life party, whose purpose presumably would be to do nothing more than fight every day against abortion even if the issue at hand is, say… the economy, or war, or the thousands of things which actually get regularly debated in Congress as opposed to, say, abortion. Which in fact is almost never debated in Congress at all because we all know the SuperLiberal(tm) Supreme Court, with its 9 Carter/Obama appointees, has got that issue covered.
Hey, you know who might help get the GOP back on track? A jowly white guy.
A more honest depiction, perhaps, would be to that of his loquacious side kick…
Fucker’s taking my name in vain. THIS MEANS WAR.
Here’s the application to apply for Michael Steele’s job!:
http://net.gop.com/Jobs/
Title: Lord Supreme Ruler Of All Republicans Forever
First Name: Ronald
MIddle Name: Wilson
Last Name: Reagan
Preferred Name: “Dutch”
Suffix: HRH (His Royal Highness)
I am a U.S. Citizen: Yes, born in Illinois, a REAL U.S. State, unlike Hawaii which is part of Muslimland
I am a U.S. Veteran: Yes, commander of the submarine USS Starfish in “Hellcats of the Navy”
WORK / COLLEGE:
Current Employer: Deceased
Occupation: Deceased
Are you a college/grad student: Eureka College graduate
HOME:
United States Capitol Rotunda, Lying In State
Geographic Coordinates: N 38° 53.388 W 077° 00.617
Street Address: US Capitol
City: Washington
State: D.C., DC USA
Zip: 00000
YouTube VIDEO:
You may create a clip on YouTube of why you want to work at the RNC and cut/paste the URL in the box provided:
What’s a “You Tube”? Is that like test tube babies? What? I’m confused… Alzheimer’s doesn’t go away just because you’re dead, you know.
Packherd: He’s history’s greatest monster!
Every time I see that pic of Michael Steele I think of C. Thomas Howell in “Soul Man.”
The DNC should have spent that billboard money on a nice fruit basket for Steele for every day he’s able to stay the head of the GOP. He is the greatest gift they’ve ever been given.
That picture of Steele really bugs me. It’s not that it was from a stupid political ad. Look at his face, the way they put make up on him. He looks like he’s been assaulted by a legion of Merle Norman saleswomen. His skin is a distinctly uniform color with a matte appearance from collar up over his scalp. No, the missed a spot by his ear, I think.
Mike is loaded with bad pancake makeup in that photos.
Back to what you were discussing.
AngryBlakGuy: ….awkward silence.
Scarab: Don’t forget Bobby Jindal, or as my resident office wingnut refers to him: “The Other Colored Guy.”
You people you - you really make me laugh. For reals.
hobgoblin of little minds: Except for those defetused types.
HAS MICHAEL STEELE GONE ROGUE???!!!
(it’s just not the same w/o the all caps.
The cries for Steele to be recalled or resign keep getting louder and shriller, but methinks the Republicans are stuck with him. If Steele goes not only would it prove that the party is in complete disarray, but also destroy minority outreach efforts, ostracize moderates, and validate every negative stereotype about the GOP. Even Republicans can’t be that out of touch, can they? CAN THEY???!!!
Canuckledragger: he had a massive hit with “Humpty Dance” while fronting Digial Underground,
He likes his beats Funky, he’s Spunky, he likes his Oatmeal Lumpy.
snideinplainsight: What do you mean “you people”?!one11?/!?!
AxmxZ: Like all Republicans, he just wants to one day finally become a jowly old white guy on his third marriage wearing sansslacks and yelling out the front door “get offa my lawn!”
Canuckledragger: Don’t forget Steele also once got busy in a Burger King bathroom
Double Scorpion: I think the next GOP leader should also be from the South. The Republicans need more outreach to jowly white guys from the South– double word score if he also doesn’t believe in Evolution.
And that lil’ doggie is thinkin’ “So what if I voted for Carter. Can we go now? I hafta pee.”
Hooray For Anything: Triple word score if his name comes from the Batman TV show fight scenes. Zap! Piyush! Saxby!
As I watch the remains of the GOP devolve into a blubbering mass of wing-nut goo, I realize that W did have one lasting accomplishment.
Michael Steele… in the tank?
“Gays? Hey, not their fault!”–hahahahahahah…good one, Ken.
Just need a lil’ whiteout an’ we can reuse them bodacious Obama Waffles!
The Laughing Quaker says:
HA! HA!
I’M COMMITTING
POLITICAL HARA-KIRI!
Canuckledragger: Mike “Lex” Steele? WIN.
Accordion-o-rama: What do you mean by one lasting accomplishment. He destroyed our economy, our world standing, and the Republican Party- the rare Triple Crown of FAIL.
Links: I don’t know about yours, but my mailman (unionized gubmint employee and all that) listens to Rush.
Vartan84: So… they become Catholics?
WHY CAN’T THE Y’ALL LET MICHAEL STEELE BE GREAT!!??
Cicada: no no no!!1! Rush is the ONE AND ONLY TRUE REPUBLICAN LEADER AND RIGHTFUL HEIR TO RONALD REAGAN!!… and just because 91% of the US population (the Socialist Islamofascist LIBERAL terrorist Anti-American Jesus-hating part) think that Rush is a drug-addled, Viagra-freebasing, self-aggrandizing gasbag who’s as worthless as a sack of pasty pink shit doesn’t change the fact that Rush speaks to, and on behalf of, the Majority of Real Americans and that us Real Americans should publicly acclaim him as our Infallible GOP Leader at all times in every way and do not let the American voting public forget the GOP’s undying loyalty to Rush until we can SAVE the country from That Muslin Socialist usurper in OUR WHITE House!!
Thanks to these grand news sources, I now know that I should never vote for a Republican as they are the true liberals.
Lionel Hutz Esq.: RONPAUL~~~!!!1!
Moleman v2.5: Please, Republicans love Woody Allen. After all, the Bush administration was based upon Bananas, and the Iraq War was based upon Love and Death.
One Yield Regular: It is a well known fact that there were no blacks in New York City until the Clinton administration bussed them there to defeat Rudy.
hobgoblin of little minds: Today we are all Jimmy Carter!
The man is clearly as queer as the ace of spades….Did I also mention he’s black? Just sayin’!
Lionel Hutz Esq.: I thought the Bush administration was based on Take the Money and Run!
Lionel Hutz Esq.: You could also say the Bush Administration was based on “Crimes and Misdemeanors” too
davesnothere: Um… like, the part where the guy cums on Chauncey’s shoes, right? (That scene was in the book; the movie delicately sidesteps it by having teh gai guy just make a pass at Chauncey.)
Lionel Hutz Esq.: Michael Steele is what my Granny Hall would call a real n—–.
ms_mcgee: Yeah, then they wouldn’g have to worry about sex scandals
Hey, Mike, just before you get fired next week, howzabout calling Rush Limbaugh again and tell him what a turd he is. That was awesome.
This is just so mind-boggling because the GOP wants to win more seats, right? They want to win things, right? In order to win they will have to CHANGE a few things. They will have to CHANGE their image. They will have to bring new people into the fold. Appeal to moderates. Try NOT to be seen as the party of mouth-breathing freepers. That’s all Michael Steele did, he tried. I mean, I really hate minority republicans, but if I’m sticking up for Michael Steele—jeeeez. If the GOP wants to go further down the rabbit hole into the fleshy embrace of extreme conservatism, so be it. Even better for the Dems.
Michael Steele is just like his dog. He just wants to be loved, but he also needs a leash.
I think it’s really racist of the GOP to give the worst job in the world to a black guy. Maccacca. Also.
Yoo hoo, K Lo! Saint Ronald I said he voted for Roosevelt, three times. You better expel him from the party posthumously for not having been sufficiently Reaganesque in his early years.
So when do they yank this Democratic rat who infiltrated their all-white party?
http://democralypsenow.blogspot.com/
By Maryland Republican standards, Dennis Kucinich is too right wing.
More from K-Lo
I also don’t know what “bomb-thrower extraordinaire” means
Ask William Ayers, K-Lo
The Republican party is melting. As Stephen Colbert would say, he’s got a one way ticket back to cutting the ribbon at the Labor Day Crab Cake Festival.
I love watching the progression of this shitshow, and hailstorm of losers it entails. Nothing is to easy for them to fuck up. But ABORTION, come on?????? 1. cut taxes, 2. no abortions ever, 3. super tuber!!!
waffles on abortion? no, no, no. you put the abortion on the waffles. laws of physics, guys!
Michael Steele and Roland Burris:
21st century Stepin Fetchits.
I am an anti-abortionist. It is sad to see that so many women had their unwanted baby aborted but so many other women want babies desperately but cannot have one. Adoption is a viable alternative to abortion and accomplishes the same result. And with 1.5 million American families wanting to adopt a child, there is no such thing as an unwanted child.