BETTER SIT DOWN FOR THIS ONE  4:37 pm March 9, 2009

Joe The Plumber Denounces Michael Steele

by Jim Newell

A computer-generated mashup of Michael Steele and Joe the PlumberNothing’s more exciting on a Monday afternoon than when you’re trolling for another lame Meghan McCain news story and instead find a new instance of feuding between two of the five or six most comical GOP characters. What! Look at this! Joe the Plumber has lashed out at Michael Steele! Jonathan Krohn must be so embarrassed.

What’s great about Joe the Plumber’s Denunciation is that it veers toward the non-racially transcendent. That’s a fine and long-awaited turn in the anti-Steele wingnut rhetoric, if we do say so:

“Unfortunately we have a chairman up there who wants to redefine conservatism; he wants to make it hip hop, put it in a new package and sell it,” Wurzelbacher said [at a conservative summit]…

Hear that, Republicans? This Michael Steele wants to change the Republican party’s image! Is he INSANE? And worse yet, he wants (however lamely) to make an effort to reintroduce minorities and young adults to the party! Doesn’t he know that minorities and young adults can’t even vote, because of the poll tax?

Speakers stress upholding principles at conservative summit [WisPolitics via TPM DC]

 
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{ 71 comments }

Texan Bulldoggette March 9, 2009 at 4:42 pm

That’s great, Joe. Shouldn’t you be at home working on your lawsuit against OH? Or, better yet–fixing someone’s damn toilet! Or is RushBo your sugar daddy & you no longer need to work to eat, live and maybe even pay off your back taxes. Hey, here’s a thought–drop your lawsuit & OH forgives your back tax debt. Douche nozzle. Also.

EnBuenOra March 9, 2009 at 4:44 pm

I would so believe in magic baby Jesus for at least a little while if the Republicans would make Not-Joe the Not-Plumber the head of the Republican Party.

Serolf Divad March 9, 2009 at 4:44 pm

If Joe the Plumber and Rush Limbaugh got in a fight, who’d win?*

*Stipulation: both must be hopped up on Oxycontin

Woodwards Friend March 9, 2009 at 4:44 pm

Joe the Plumber is better than Rush. He’s the gift that keeps on giving.

JadedDIssonance March 9, 2009 at 4:46 pm

Michael Steele: “Subversion! Hippity Hop! IMAGERY!”

JtP: “Squeak squeaker squeakums?”

V572625694 March 9, 2009 at 4:48 pm

[re=261007]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: Your “also” is a reminder that we haven’t heard anything from the Snowbilly in, what — five or six days now? Doesn’t she wither and die without the nourishing beams of the Media Spotlight?

mc_frontalot March 9, 2009 at 4:50 pm

Next up: Sarah Palin goes for the jugular in her criticism of beloved GOP icon Sexless Hovering Cherub From 14th-Century Painting.

OffTheRecord March 9, 2009 at 4:51 pm

I’m trying, and failing, to not giggle out loud over the alt text. Well done Mr. Newell.

V572625694 March 9, 2009 at 4:52 pm

[re=261010]Serolf Divad[/re]: Isn’t JtP more of a crystal-meth kinda personality? All that short-attention-span jerking around? Whereas Rush has the avoirdupois and personal demeanor of a downer-lover. So Joe’d swing a 14″ Stillson upside Rush’s head, but it’d bounce off the rolls of jaw fat.

Oh, I’m making myself sick here.

HopeyDope March 9, 2009 at 4:54 pm

This is delicious.

Texan Bulldoggette March 9, 2009 at 4:54 pm

[re=261016]V572625694[/re]: Maybe she’s trying to come across as the sane Republican?? Never fear, though. She (like Putin) will rear her head soon enough over the lower 48 & rape & pillage until there’s nothing left but a few hillbillies in overalls & some dead goats.

Judas Peckerwood March 9, 2009 at 4:55 pm

Heh-heh, JtP said “package.”

TheMac March 9, 2009 at 4:55 pm

we have a chairman up there who wants to redefine conservatism; he wants to make it hip hop, put it in a new package and sell it

Good thing Rush is the real leader, behind the scenes. And Steele is just there to be spoken to in broken ebonics by very very very white people.

DangerousLiberal March 9, 2009 at 4:56 pm

Wow, it looks like Rushbo has a firm grip on JtP’s nutsack. Keep squeezing, Rush.

shortsshortsshorts March 9, 2009 at 4:56 pm

http://crooksandliars.com/david-neiwert/right-wing-pundits-agree-being-leade

This contains some wonderful “video” of dumb pundits (Kristol and friends) going around a table and talking about how fantastic it is now to have a real party leader, because obviously not running off a cohesive message did the Democrats YEARS of good.

CivicHoliday March 9, 2009 at 4:57 pm

[re=261016]V572625694[/re]: she’s been too busy giving Ken Salazar head so he’ll make sure wolves are de-listed from ESA.

El Vista March 9, 2009 at 4:57 pm

A program pitch for CSPAN Pay-Per-View: Republican Leadership Summit – 2009.

Coulter, Limbaugh, Meggie, Joe, Michael Steele, Michelle Malkin, Sarah.

Doomsday, Barbed Wire, Death Match.

Wet T-Shirts for the ladies, concrete boots for the men. Whatever for Lindsay Graham and Miss McConnell, if they wanted to attend.

facehead March 9, 2009 at 4:58 pm

Steele should never have left the Wu-Tang Clan . . .

magic titty March 9, 2009 at 4:59 pm

Oh Jesus. They’re having a culture war within the Party now? This is rad.

jagorev March 9, 2009 at 4:59 pm

I’d give Joe the Plumber a pass on the racial code thing. Michael Steele, after all, is the one who first brought hip hop into the discourse (in a hilariously ridiculous way, but still). Using hip hop to characterize Steele’s approach is fair play now.

CollegeStudent March 9, 2009 at 5:00 pm

[re=261010]Serolf Divad[/re]: We would win Serlof, we would win.

Fivetree March 9, 2009 at 5:01 pm

Oh dear, that’s right, we DID almost go an entire week without a press release from the ubiquitous ‘Ho the Plumber, didn’t we? Can’t we just move on with our lives and pretend he never existed? Oh, that’s right, he DOESN’T exist.

comradepaulson March 9, 2009 at 5:02 pm

Michael Steele IS making the party more hip-hop. I mean, look at all these denunciations back and forth: Frum V Lardassbaugh, Plumbers V Steele, Lardassbaugh V Steele… it’s like Jay-Z V Nas from back in the day, only without the Doors sample, or, you know, music at all.

And Meaghan V Coulter? Totally, Roxanne Shante V Real Roxanne.

V572625694 March 9, 2009 at 5:03 pm

[re=261027]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: Remember (and fear) this formula:

Palin + better handlers = Reagan

[re=261038]CivicHoliday[/re]: Nice! Do you caress your mother with those typing fingers?

Birdcrash March 9, 2009 at 5:04 pm

Like an onion, Joe has many layers, and like onion rot Joe is deep.

shanemacgowan March 9, 2009 at 5:06 pm

“(US Rep. Paul)Ryan said Republicans have to do more than say ‘no’ and offer alternatives.

“It’s our job as Republicans to tell you the truth and tell you what’s going on,” Ryan said. “We owe it to you to offer the American people an alternative.”

Didn’t he get the memo? Republican’s only job is to say no. Republicans are the speedbump of democracy!

StripesAndPlaids March 9, 2009 at 5:09 pm

Michael Steele’s Response: “Plumber, Please!”

Serolf Divad March 9, 2009 at 5:11 pm

[re=261049]CollegeStudent[/re]:

Bingo! You win the all expenses cruise!

demtard March 9, 2009 at 5:11 pm

[re=261011]Woodwards Friend[/re]: Yes, I agree: Joe the Plumber is political herpes.

Hooray For Anything March 9, 2009 at 5:11 pm

[re=261052]comradepaulson[/re]: Does this mean that one day, Michael Steele will be shot dead by unknown assailants in Vegas casino and a few weeks later, Rush will be gunned down in retribution?

queeraselvis v 2.0 March 9, 2009 at 5:12 pm

GOP implosion in 1…1…1…

President Beeblebrox March 9, 2009 at 5:19 pm

For some reason this whole comical mess has created in my head a rap that sounds like Schooly D’s Aqua Teen Hunger Force theme… my rhymes are sort of lame, but this is just so frakking hilarious that I couldn’t help myself.

My name is …
Mike Steele
The real deal
An urban-suburban hip-hop settin’
Fo’ da party of
Ronald Reagan

Joe-lock and he’s on top
Rock you with some cops
Sarah, you up next wit’ ya knock-knock

Sarah shoot da moosies, see? Sarah get da clothing, G
Risin’ like a star, fallin’ like a car
Ice on her fingas and her toes, from da RNC

Uh, check-check it, yeah…
Cuz we are the GOP Teens
Urban-suburban hip-hop settin’ make me wanna scream

Cuz we are the GOP Teens,
Urban-suburban hip-hop settin’ make me wanna scream

GOP Teen Hunga Force – numba 1 in the hood, G!

Carrie_Okie March 9, 2009 at 5:21 pm

also what is the countdown clock before JtP get’s caught working for NAMBLA and trying to assassinate (they just like saying “ass” twice) Andy Cuomo? I’d give it a week. Also, since he’s Joe the fucking fake plumber, will NYPD give him the plunger treatment? I need answers. Also buttsecks.

AxmxZ March 9, 2009 at 5:23 pm

It’s like watching an terrarium full of spiders all eating each other simultaneously.

Go Joe the Spider, go!

gurukalehuru March 9, 2009 at 5:24 pm

I’m Steele, motherfuckers! and I’m here to say
No way, hey baby, am I going away
I’m the chairman of the party and I’m feeling strong
so you can get jiggy or you can get gone
I’m gonna show ths party some shock and awe
because I’m Mike Tyson’s brother-in-law!

GreatSatan March 9, 2009 at 5:24 pm

Is it too late to hope JtP is actually Sascha Baron Cohen making a new movie?

TeddyS March 9, 2009 at 5:30 pm

See, Joe? That’s what you get for running off to report for Pajamas Meida on the war between the whatevers amd the whoevers. The Republicans who thought they were the party leaders (having been elected at local levels by their party) got together and elected somebody chairman. Turns out they were just a bunch of lefties. Never go away again. Please.

Tomthebunny March 9, 2009 at 5:37 pm

[re=261016]V572625694[/re]: She was in downtown Anchorage for the ceremonial start of the Iditarod on Saturday- you think her voice is annoying on TV, try hearing that fingernails-on-a-blackboard screech coming out of a lousy outdoor loudspeaker! Truly astonishing. And of course she was parading her annoying kids around as well- some things never change.

Suds McKenzie March 9, 2009 at 5:42 pm

His presence has shamed the term “Summit” for eternity.

chascates March 9, 2009 at 5:50 pm

Harold Stassen, you would look like one of the Founding Fathers now.

Bronkers March 9, 2009 at 6:03 pm

[re=261144]chascates[/re]: Harold Stassen, the best argument for cloning that the GOP can muster, given the alternatives.

Advocatus_Diaboli March 9, 2009 at 6:07 pm

Obvs JtP didn’t get the memo that the only reason G(r)OPers are interested in minorities and young adults is for the sexxxy time.

Advocatus_Diaboli March 9, 2009 at 6:12 pm

[re=261053]V572625694[/re]: Jesus. Thanks. I’ll be waking up in a sweat at least once weekly for the next 25 years or so of my life with that reality check.

El Pinche March 9, 2009 at 6:17 pm

Segue from Sam the Turd to the GOP toilet water continuing to spiral:

GOP Rep. Patrick McHenry: “Our Goal Is To Bring Down Approval Numbers” For Dems

http://theplumline.whorunsgov.com/house-republicans/gop-rep-our-goal-is-to-bring-down-approval-numbers-for-dems/

Mr Blifil March 9, 2009 at 6:34 pm

Is Wurzelbacher unaware of what happened to Guckert/Gannon? He should ask Ana Marie Cox, they seem to be hanging around some of the same folks.

Graphictruth March 9, 2009 at 6:38 pm
V572625694 March 9, 2009 at 6:44 pm

[re=261161]Advocatus_Diaboli[/re]: It’s funny frightening because it’s true!

Graphictruth March 9, 2009 at 6:44 pm

He is the grift that keeps on giving…

Advocatus_Diaboli March 9, 2009 at 6:58 pm

[re=261203]V572625694[/re]: Yup. Ghosts, Goblins, Damiens, etc. – that’s child’s play.

What’s really scary is that 50 something million people voted for W. Twice!

And these mouth-breathers still account for a worrisome percentage of the electorate.

Shit. Jesus. Fuck. I have to go back to my hairshirt, now – it’s so much more comforting.

problemwithcaring March 9, 2009 at 7:06 pm

“You can’t sell principles; either you have them or you don’t,” Wurzelbacher said to applause from most of the 800 in attendance.

Now did Joe get get his principles after divorce number one or divorce number two? Or during the mandatory battered wife counseling? Or after paying the restitution to the domestic violence shelters?

monthlykos March 9, 2009 at 7:09 pm

[re=261106]GreatSatan[/re]: GreatSatan, that’s the best line I’ve read in awhile. Did you make that up yourself?

problemwithcaring March 9, 2009 at 7:19 pm

[re=261221]problemwithcaring[/re]: Not that I am saying he beat his two ex-wives. I fully believe they just could no longer stand the sight of him.

picyou March 9, 2009 at 7:37 pm

Carville must be paying Joe the Plumber. I’m sure he’d take the money, don’t you think? $10, $20, whatever gets thrown on the floor in front of him. What a whore.

saggyboobedhag March 9, 2009 at 7:42 pm

Am I supposed to disrespect Michael Steele because he’s incompetent or because he is black? Or is he incompetent because he is black? Maybe Patrick McHenry can forward that talking point to me because I’m soooo confused.

picyou March 9, 2009 at 7:44 pm

By the way, I just Googled “joe the plumber”+whore. 39,800 hits.

picyou March 9, 2009 at 7:49 pm

[re=261242]saggyboobedhag[/re]: No, it’s the Boston terrier in the picture. That bothers me.

Bearbloke March 9, 2009 at 8:07 pm

[re=261039]El Vista[/re]: Lady Lindsay & Miss Mitch will serve as the event’s official fluffers…

Schadenfried March 9, 2009 at 8:33 pm

[re=261010]Serolf Divad[/re]: Rush would sit on Joe. Also.

rocktonsammy March 9, 2009 at 9:20 pm

I thought JTP was Hannity’s bitch.

JSDC007 March 9, 2009 at 10:20 pm

Michael Steele is to hip hop what JTP is to plumbing.

slinkimalinki March 10, 2009 at 12:22 am

[re=261128]Tomthebunny[/re]: you spelt “idiot-tard” wrong.

richardwb1 March 10, 2009 at 1:23 am

JtP?

Jesus the Pimp?

zhubajie March 10, 2009 at 2:27 am

[re=261062]shanemacgowan[/re]: Reps tell the truth? That’s a new one! They’ll offer to balance the budget next!

Zhu Bajie

proudcitizen March 10, 2009 at 7:58 am

I love it that the Repugs are now lead by a redneck trailer-park queen, a fat, blowhard talk radio mouth, Kenny for 30 Rock, an ineffectual failed Maryland hack and now a self-promoting, way-over-his-15-minutes loser. Things are really looking up for the repugs now.

Meaux March 10, 2009 at 10:00 am

See, Newell, you CAN do alt text!

Schadenfried March 10, 2009 at 2:05 pm

[re=261052]comradepaulson[/re]: I’d say Khia vs Trina.

Schadenfried March 10, 2009 at 2:06 pm

[re=261094]President Beeblebrox[/re]: SACRELIGE(sp?)!!!!!one11! Also.

DustBowlBlues March 10, 2009 at 2:18 pm

[re=261009]EnBuenOra[/re]: A big yes to that.
Joe-the-tax-dodging-not-a-plumber as chairman of RNC and Sarah Palin as their candidate. It would be an orgasmic pairing for the wingers in rural America and reduce their share of the electorate to between 26 and 29 percent of the voters. I choose those numbers, because they were Bush’s very favorable ratings at the end of his disastrous turn in the WH. It’s the Permanent Stupid in America.

Hey–I’ll think I’ll trademark that term so nobody be using it.

Jazzman March 10, 2009 at 4:42 pm

Da plumber must be stopped. He is soaking up 15 minutes of fame from every deserving as yet unknown wing nut in the country. They deserve a turn too! Besides, I need someone new to mock.

aflurry March 10, 2009 at 5:11 pm

[re=261048]jagorev[/re]: As long as it creates more trouble, i’m for it.

GreatSatan March 11, 2009 at 4:08 am

[re=261222]monthlykos[/re]: Wow, thanks. I did, in fact, make it up myself.

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