Wonkette
We’re not sure if this is funny or not — no, actually, we are sure it’s not funny, at all, but it is puerile and dumb and basically nobody knows how to act like an adult. (HINT: You walk over to the kid with the fart machine and beat the shit out of him.) [Funny or Die via Gizmodo]
Chronic flatulence is no laughing matter that’s certain. Neither is Meghan McCain’s notorious propensity for busting out heinous pussy farts. Grow up for god’s sake.
The Republicans need to take a page out of this playbook if they have any hopes of blocking Barry’s agenda.
What? Farts aren’t funny now? Damn elitists and their new PC humour.
Where does one get this “fart machine”?
Take THAT, 14-year-old GOP wunderkid!
Mr Blifil ;
It’s a Queef.
Or in Megans case, and maverick McQueef.
Palin has Eskimo Queefs.
Eric Cantor has Queefs that make a noise only dogs can hear, becasue he’s so tight, he’s harder to get into thatn a Lady GaGA concert.
american mutt: Taco Bell has the patent on an organic model.
Who the heck is doing it? I felt embarrassed for the adults who couldn’t stop laughing. I mean, yeah, I’d chuckle for a second or two. Then it would get old and I’d be all “WE HAVE BUSINESS TO DO MOTHERFUCKERS!” And I like the suggestion to walk over to the kid or whoever and get the stupid fart making thing away from them.
Mr Blifil:
Yeah, queefs are not funny, you hear that, people? Queefs are not totally hilarious!!!! Don’t mock the queef!!!!!
Great Moments in Civic History, FTW. These public access meetings are usually so damn boring, but now everyone is going to Tivo them and see if anyone farts, queefs, or projectile vomits (from a bad batch of hobo beans) during these meetings.
It’s what we did for fun during the Depression, kids, before the Intertubes collapsed.
Mr Blifil: I’m not sure I’ve heard, or seen, the word “queef” in a very long time, and am certain I’ve not encountered it on another blog. And it amuses me, I’m shouting it and laughing in my office as we speak. Now it must be used and used often; David Vitter is a queef, there, that felt better!
I love my remote controlled fart machine. I place it in the office bathroom and use the remote from another room and tell my coworkers that a messenger asked to use the facilities. You can get one for $10 at CVS.
HAHAHAHAHA–POOP!—HAHAHAHAHAH!!!!1!!
american mutt: Go here, ask for “K-Lo.”
Also! Attention Wonketteers, I have made an important discovery.
I just saw a man wearing a “Larry Craig Plumbing Co.” shirt at 7/11 featuring the slogan “I’ll help you drain that pipe!”
Which one of you brilliantly creative kids is selling these to support your whiskey habit?
Judas Peckerwood: Ummm… I believe that the Republicans have taken enough Pages, thank you very much.
Farting is real funny until you shart during a filibuster.
I have to attend LA City Council meeting for my new job and and SHIT funny about that….
TaxWallStreet: I stand corrected. Respect for proper terminology is also not funny.
Mild Midwesterner: True, but they always return them in gently-used condition.
The kids of today are so goddamn lazy. Back in my day, we would’ve eaten a tub full of raw eggs, baked beans & broccoli (aka a “Tosmai Salad”) and projectile pooped up in that skanky piece. Word. Fart machine, my ass— my ass!
So how does this Fart Machine differ from Ye Olde Whoopie Cushion?
Zhu Bajie
Is there some way to sneak this thing into a lot of TV/Radio news programs? I’m sure it would improve whatever Sean Hannity or Bill O’Reilly are saying. As for Pus Limpbowel….
Zhu Bajie
My operative tells me it was not a kid but the city council member next to the woman who had the fart machine.
Really, though, think about it, that machine is TOTALLY on-mike. If it was in the audience, it would sound way distant, or not be audible at all. The audience is 20 or 30 feet away. I’ve seen those machines and they’re not loud enough to register direct modulation from such a distance on monodirectional microphones such as those that the council is using. It HAS to be up on the dais! As a 32-year veteran broadcast producer, I know how these things work or don’t work. That’s a grown-up, elected representative of a constituency pushing the flatulence button.
This must be investigated thoroughly.
montresor: We must get to the bottom of this.
montresor: Suspicious! Alternatively, though, could it have been the kid in yellow who rushes away from the audience microphone immediately after the sound was made? That also seemed kinda suspicious.
Huh. I thought it was funny.
Jesus, that was fucking funny. Almost as funny as my old cactus back in college, lovingly named Big Dick, whose base rotted out during spring break and whose remains we so callously chucked into the monkey grass by the literature and journalism classroom building. The next day physical plant guys were trimming the grass — a constant EERRRGHHHHZZZZ-ERRGGGHGHHZZZ — when suddenly the gas-powered cutters sputtered and died. I was in class at the time on the side of the building where Big Dick was dumped, and my friend and accomplice leaned over and said, “They hit Big Dick.” We had the whole fucking classroom rolling and no one else had any idea what they were laughing about.