so ronery

Nobody Went To Obama’s Responsibility Orgy

It was a modest affair, to be sureSo sad! President Obama invited over a bunch of congressmen and senators to talk about being fiscally responsible, and some of them showed up, but a lot of them didn’t. Even some breakout session panelists and moderators failed to appear because who knows, maybe they had something better to do than fix the economy???

Basically the whole summit consisted of the president sitting at the end of a table in an empty room, talking to himself.

Economic Recovery Advisory Board Chairman Paul Volcker, penciled in to lead the session on taxes, didn’t come. Veterans Affairs Secretary Eric Shinseki, listed as a moderator of the health-care panel, was also missing, as was Deputy Defense Secretary William Lynn, who had been tapped as a leader of the procurement session. Another mysterious absence: CIA Director Leon Panetta, the Clinton budget director, who was expected to lead the budget panel.

Jesus Christ, does the new president have syphilis or something? Nancy Pelosi showed up late, Harry Reid didn’t show up at all…Oh yes, and Larry Summers fell asleep.

Related video

A rousing success!

What if They Held Breakout Sessions and Everyone Broke Out? [Washington Post]

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About the author

Sara K. Smith was Wonkette's morning editor from 2008 to 2010, and now contributes a weekly (?!) column to Wonkette, to prove she still loves you all!

View all articles by Sara K. Smith

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42 comments

  1. gjdodger

    Familiar story. The black guy moves into town, throws a housewarming, and his neighbors are “too busy” to attend.

  2. Naked Bunny with a Whip

    Obama should run these meetings shirtless. That will at least attract the ladies and Republicans.

  3. blinky_twinkie

    “White House Chief of Staff Rahm Emanuel, listed as one of the moderators of the procurement panel, arrived just 10 minutes before the end. ‘Oh, nice of you to join us,’ said Rep. Darrell Issa (R-Calif.). Emanuel said nothing. But Emanuel didn’t need to say anything.” Because Emanuel knew, deep deep down, that Rep. Darrell Issa (R-Calif.) would lose the use of his fucking smart-ass tongue by morning. And then Emanuel smiled, which was a fucking rare thing.

  4. Links

    They’re all hurt that Barry doesn’t reciprocate their crush and now they’re avoiding him. Barry is a victim of his hotness. And this preznincy totally failed. Over.

  5. freakishlystrong

    “Nancy Pelosi showed up late, Harry Reid didn’t show up at all” hmmmm….except for the part about Nance showing up at all, this could be any of session of Congress.

  6. Chuckie Jesus

    Dagnabbit, fifty fuckin’ quatloos to the intrepid “photojournalist” from TMZ who has the pics of Pal Volcker stepping out of a massage parlour.

  7. 4tehlulz

    Who cares? It was all worth it to see Barry publicly cockslap Walnuts and Eric Cantor, his ex-boyfriends who haven’t gotten over the breakup.

  8. Mr Blifil

    [re=250374]4tehlulz[/re]: Totally. Walnuts came off worse than Shelley Levine in Glengarry Glen Ross.

  9. jagorev

    Economic Recovery Advisory Board Chairman Paul Volcker, penciled in to lead the session on taxes, didn’t come

    Well maybe the Volcker would have shown up if Obama had bothered to listen to him at any point in the last three months, or give him a staff, or show him that he is not just there to serve as press conference decoration.

    Honestly, the Obama economic team is comprised of the two enormous egoes of Summers & Geithner. They have grabbed all power for themselves and basically told everyone else to go pound sand. Volcker has good reason to be pissed.

  10. TGY

    Hopey doesn’t understand about sweetening meeting attendance by handing out free TruckNutz or Crackberries or something.

  11. ignatius_riley

    Eh, IDK. A half empty “summit” of sleeping people can still do a better job than Bush & Co.

  12. freakishlystrong

    [re=250380]snideinplainsight[/re]: per Michale Steele, it’s a buncha Republican Dawgs, Baby..

  13. grendel

    They figured at a responsibility orgy they’d have to wear condoms… and really, when you’re enjoying sex with multiple semi-anonymous partners, do you really want to have a piece of rubber come between you?

  14. gjdodger

    [re=250381]Come here a minute[/re]: Maybe if Bernanke says the recession will end tomorrow, the Dow will double!

  15. chascates

    Just as well. Wasn’t this the meeting where the neocons would make a case to get rid of Social Security?

  16. Virtually _insane

    Something is wrong here …. According to ABC…. NBC…. MSNBC … everybody was holding hands and sang the Kum-Ba-Ya wiht Barry around the camp fire…..

    NO fair Barry …. no fair

  17. Virtually _insane

    Something is wrong here …. According to ABC…. NBC…. MSNBC … everybody was holding hands and sang the Kum-Ba-Ya wiht Barry around the camp fire…..

    where is my comment ….no fair Barry …. no fair

  18. PrairiePossum

    Barry should have announced there would be a swimming pool filled with puppies – that always draws a crowd.

  19. Cicada

    [re=250366]blinky_twinkie[/re]: As a former Californian, the idea of Rahm doing horrible things to Darryl Issa gives me the warm tinglies. Thanks!

  20. AxmxZ

    Aw, poor Barry… I’ll be your friend! We can stay up all night, paint each other’s toenails and build sound plans for economic and industrial recovery!

  21. Uncle Glenny

    “Economic Recovery Advisory Board Chairman Paul Volcker, penciled in to lead the session on taxes, didn’t come.”

    Next time try Hot Lube on the dildo, and nipple clamps. And for Volcker, he should use the JO lube that has as its motto “Mens et Manus” – the same as on the MIT seal.

Comments are closed.