Wonkette
Fox News lady: “I’ve got a picture of what the monkey would look like — we’re waiting for some live video of the search to come in — and it’s my screensaver now, Jim… I want you to take a look at that, that’s what we’re dealing with, that’s what they can look like when they’re upset. They’re known because the males have bright blue scrotums.” One minute later, John Gibson: Eric Holder has a bright blue scrotum, haw haw haw. [YouTube]
Also: “Monkey on Lose”?
A bright blue scrotum would indeed be easy to see in the wild — and wild to see! I wonder what Reverend Al Franken has to say about how this relates to Obama.
Ha ha, she said, “scrotum,” repeatedly.
Geez, this has got the Faux news foxes worried, like they really might get attacked/raped by primates, like Cindy McCain.
A blue scrotum? No wonder he was so angry.
Gibson actually says that. WTF?
I’m actually quite proud of my bright blue state scrotum.
WTF? Maybe Rupert should just send all his employees white hoods to wear on camera from now on.
So this is the kind of hard-hitting, investigative ‘News’ the Trailer people like to tune into.
I wouldn’t know, except Wonkette told me so.
FUNNY! Cause all blacks are like chimpanzees with there long arms and blackness and noises, right?
Oh John Gibson, you imp! If the blacks (or anyone for that matter) ever do start a revolution I hope that they tie a bucket full of starving rats to your backside. Cause when they dig themselves out through your gut that would be funny also!
Also.
Calm down, everyone. The monkey didn’t escape — he’s just on his way to Hannity to explain his opposition to Obama’s mortgage relief bill.
What is there to say other than, I wanna’ see those two Fux News wombats having wild lockdown sex on pay per view? NOW.
Wow, they just don’t get it. At all. Hey Gibson, eat a heaping bag of blue scrotumed dicks. Moran. Also.
I hate when people call their desktop background their screen saver! That bugs me so much that “bright blue scrotum” didn’t have much of an impact on me. I guess I need to learn how to choose my battles a little better.
Next week, they’ll just be dusting off the ‘n’ word & using it at will. No more referring to black people as monkeys because that’s just for pussies. Real men use the ‘n’ word.
They called Eric Holder a monkey.
Brings a whole new meaning to the phrase “I blue myself,” doesn’t it, Dr. Fünke?
Honestly, these wingnuts fuckers just do not get it. If you’re going to say racist things, then admit they are racist. Don’t do this whole stupid “it was a joke” shit. Let’s see the face behind the white hood you assholes.
I hope Gibson gets violated by a rake. I know that doesn’t ironically tie in with monkeys or blue balls or black people. But whatever. This asshole is way beyond sensitivity training. He needs to be ass-raked.
loquaciousmusic: Win.
Fair and balanced KKKonservatives. The monkey is smarter, cuter and has a nicer scrotum.
Gibson is just worried that you can’t get white babies out of blue scrotums. Also, he is a racist ass-hole. Also.
Ha ha, that’s funny because…uh…
Wait, not funny. Racist. Yes, this is completely and unambiguously racist.
SpecialHorse: It’s like when your grandmother forwards some dumbass Obama birth certificate urban legend chain letter to you, but you don’t notice how stupid the email is because you’re too distracted by her @aol.com address.
Texan Bulldoggette: I kind of expect it at this point. And of course, they will use the “it is just a joke” defense when people point out what assholes they are.
They have stopped trying.
Why’d the producers decide the black lady who works there should be monkey expert for the day?
Here’s an update. Fox News, headed by Sean Hannity, have announced a bounty of $50,000 per monkey shot until someone finally gets Obama. Not that there is any linkage….
Red Zeppelin: So, this series of monkeys gone wild advents have just been a viral attempt by McCain to get noticed again?
So their advice is, if you see a rampaging angry monkey, go up to it and grab its ballsack to get a good look at the color. Got it.
magic titty: Well who else has seen some blue monkey balls?
Fox News on the lose.
Ladies and Gentlemen, behold the GOP’s “urban-suburban hip-hop” strategy.
OK enuf is enuf. Lock down all remaining Republicans and kick the shit out of their heads, then stomp on them until they die, then dance on their fucking graves.
This shit is NOT FUNNY dudes. Time to line up all the fucking Republicans against a wall and bang the shit out of them. And I don’t mean in a nice way.
Did one of those women call it a “brat sea monkey”? chascates: Ms Faulkner: “I don’t wanna profess knowing too much about the primate population.”
One of these days (I don’t know, this coming Tuesday?), a transcript of Fox News will just read like this: Jigaboo, porchmonkey, obama, spear-chucker, jungle bunny, pickaninny, aunt jemima, watermelon, obama, eric holder… the end. And they’ll be like, “What? It was a joke, libruls. Get a sense of humor.”
We are not even a month into the President Obama era. The next 8 years are gonna RULE!
John Gibson should have made a joke about Janet Reno’s bright blue scrotum instead. Then it would have been lulzy. Also.
i suspect the whole thing was a set-up for the “joke”. i live in seattle and no one (not local news or blogs) were talking about the De Brazza, because they weigh like 15 pounds and it was only loose in the zoo, not running around downtown attacking tourists.
user-of-owls: Word. Does the chair of the RNC know about this? Did he approve of this message? Way to build the big tent. The big circus tent of gap toothed racist yokels.
YesWeKant: I fully expect Fox to run some sort of Culture Report in the near future wherein they conclude that the election of President Obama makes it OK for white people to (finally!) use the word nigger. Then it will cut to an anchor for coverage of nigger President Obama’s visit to some nigger country in Africa. The scroll will read as follows: NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER forever.
“I just called the attorney general a monkey”
If you think that is racist then you don’t share John Gibson’s sense of humor.
Oh, sweet Jesus. You know, I truly don’t think that NY Post cartoon from yesterday was racist, even though Sean Delonas is the world’s biggest loser. I really think he was saying the stim was so stupid it was written by monkeys. Then fucking Gibson comes along and I have to reevaluate EVERYTHING.
Notice how many times they say “Angry Monkey”, hint, hint… Get the feeling wingnuts really hate to lose an election, especially to one of them Afro-kin guys?
Geez, John Gibson can’t even keep his stereotypes straight. First he says whites need to make more babies to keep up with all us colored folks, and now Eric Holder has blue balls?
I began the day reading about one armed midgets and now I end with bright blue monkey sacks, when the Right is on, the Right is ON!
So much for the “frank conversation about racial matters”.
Pat Buchanan’s head was about to explode on Hardball tonight because Holder said we were a ‘nation of cowards’ re: race. Too bad Michael Eric Dyson didn’t have this little tidbit handy to throw back into Pat “Bull Connor” Buchanan’s face. He’s still pissed women got the vote & the races can legally mix now.
cranky, I noticed that in the Seattle news site where I saw this story, there was not a single mention of the color of the monkey’s scrotum, but they did identify the monkey as a Debrazza. On the clip it sounded to me like the Faux newsreader said De Brett Sea Monkey. Made me snort soda up my nose.
hmm, i haven’t been local newsing the last couple of hours, but it happened early this morning and there were no warnings distributed to the citizenry regarding enraged monkeys. i did see one note about it after the whole thing was entirely over.
perhaps i made my point poorly. i thought the reporting was ONLY to set up an assortment of “racey” monkey jokes. i thought this for a few reasons:
1) they went to the report as though it were vital news, like a severe storm or a swarm of brownies was headed *right your way*
2) this was not the case for any local news sources. no local programming was interrupted to save me from cat-sized moneys with blue balls.
and they were totally giddy from the start about the whole deal, showing both regular monkey and “angry” monkey photos
Lionel Hutz Esq.: “So, this series of monkeys gone wild advents have just been a viral attempt by McCain to get noticed again?”
Yes, and the punchline is, “Where is that marvelous ape?”
I’m sure she’s an expert in diagnosing blue balls.
GlennBecksFelch: True dat. I stands corrected. Also, Win.
The question that all Fox News viewers are asking themselves now is: “Will Obama step forward and spank the monkey?”
i’d want to escape too if i had blue balls so bad they were bright blue
Michael Steele has a big blue scrotum. There. Now it’s not racist.
cranky, I was agreeing with you and expanding on your theme, that it was only a set-up for the Gibson comment.
Would macaque make everyone feel better about the whole thing?
http://democralypsenow.blogspot.com/
opie_jeanne: sorry, i’m tired. also, maybe stupid.
wickedlittledoll: Did you just call him “Macaca”, you racist…. wait, no. My bad.
Here is the problem with all the libs here on the West Coast. If we had good, red blooded Republican Americans here we could have shown the monkeys some shock and awe. Instead:
The animal was tranquilized and returned to its exhibit zookeepers after zoo officials spotted and tried to coax the monkey back to his exhibit.
http://seattlepi.nwsource.com/local/400713_monkey20.html
Check out the link for a picture of this African. Sadly for all my Republican friends out there, the picture does not feature the scrotum. However, if you are curious, there is this link: http://tinyurl.com/monkeyscrotum
Of course, because we appeased the monkey, soon Seattle will be overrun by them.
When will the Libtards learn that the only way to deal with your problems is a slug between the eyes. Then we can establish monkey democracy, and just see if any monkey ever escapes after that.
Anyone that can be described by their balls is the coolest, ever.
So Michael Scott does sensitivity training for Fox News?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-j7wr-wsmcI
Lionel Hutz Esq.: Haha. I knew there would be comic gold behind that tinyurl link. Also a little bit racist, though.
The blatant racism notwithstanding, why is it that conservatives are utterly incapable of being funny?
If there were ever a group of people that would know about blue balls, the gang at Fox would.
perhaps the geniuses over at news corp. figured calling a black man an ape would be funnier today than it was yesterday. amazingly enough, they were wrong again.
shortsshortsshorts:
Ha ha! You got that right.
Sean Hannity has a bright Red, White & Blue scrotum. All Gibson was implying is that Holder has some catching up to do!
Scrotum, scrotum,
[Spell it] S-C-R-O-T-U-M
Scrotum, scrotum,
S-C-R-O-T-U-M,
Mangy, raunchy, covered with hair,
What would you do if it wasn’t there?
Scrotum, scrotum,
Serves to keep your gonads in!
Let’s look on the bright side; maybe all this “Black Man = Monkey” stuff coming back out of the woodwork is a sign the Bitters are finally wrapping their heads around evolution?
Maybe?
Internally valid: Obscene, yes. Racist? I just don’t see it.
Two Rick Santorum stories on the same page? Really, no really!!
Lionel Hutz Esq.: I believe that was related to the Chimp-Obama cartoon thing that has stupid liberals up in arms about being “HOLY HELL. THAT IS NOT RACIAL TRANSCENDENCE!!!!1!!”
Us liberal people do dumb things, also. And also.
Also, bring back slavery. Wait, is that racist?
THE SOUTH WILL RISE AGAIN.
Imagine42: That’s monkey on the lam
Fox News Lady has pink scrotum.
davitydave: how did you get that information? Personal experience?
honkeyman: word. e.x.a.c.t.l.y
shortsshortsshorts: Ah, I understand. You see, the problem is your average libtard believes in evolution. Right thinking great Americans know that we were created in Gods own image, except for Muslims, who are darken by the flames of Hell before being born.
It’s in the Bible People!
sorry for being out of the context…but guys, (ken you also)… do check this out…
http://patdollard.com/
Just more of that “4th Estate FAIL” I mentioned in relation to the NYPost cartoon… and once again, I’m not expecting anything better of FauxNooz….
Isn’t she the “if-the-TV-van-is-a-rockin’” lady from Fox News NY?
She sucks donkey balls.
Oh great, now FOX is demonising primates (they are all terrorists). One angry - mistreated, incorrectly fed, hugely overweight, and medicated (yes I study chimpanzees) chimpanzee that should never have been kept by a private person to begin with and now they are creating a terror situation of a 20lb monkey that - might - on a good day - steal your hat or demand your ice cream. These people are idiots. Next thing we know there will be ‘rabid squirrel’ alerts, and a wildlife threat meter. Good thing it wasn’t penguins. We should close all zoos NOW! Kill all wild animals, and demand that everyone wear a pith helmet from now on - just in case…
archaeo-angel:
That’s why they call it Gorilla Warfare!
archaeo-angel: Faux News will only post ‘rabid squirrel’ alerts if they steal some Truck Nutz. And, of course, if such alerts can be easily used to stoke racist hatred. Also.
Jim,
I know I don’t write the funniest comments here. I know I’m not the most prolific writer either. I’ve said things in poor taste. I’ve drunk posted, among other things. But I don’t deserve being tricked into watching 2:50 of Fux Noiz. That’s just wrong. It’s wrong, Jim, and it hurt deep inside (I’m guessing in the colon region).
KTHX
Druk
I thought John Gibson got fired from Fox News last year. Also, he kind of looks like a white-haired gibbon himself.
I propose a trade among the races to make peace among the van-fucking newswhores:
For every 1 black=monkey jokes white folks get, blacks get to make 3 white=X jokes
(accounts for pop diffs.)
Now I just need the X part, any suggestions as to what is as offensive…..
I’m listening…
…better a big, bright blue scrotum
than a tiny, barely discernable,
itty bitty red one …
Fuck Fox News. I can’t stand this shit. Who are these coked-out, stupid motherfuckers they have reporting the “news.” I’m sorry I know you’re supposed to be all witty and hilarious in the comments but I’m just raging.
Fox News: All monkeys, all the time.
This is actually a viral trailer for the Planet of the Apes prequel: “The Rise of the Monkeys”, currently being filmed in Canada.
greywindz: LOL. My favorite is this gem of a posting guideline: Be respectful of others and their opinions. Inflammatory remarks and inane leftist drivel will be deleted.
Apparently, you can post w/o doing email registration there, also.
Well I have to admit, that was the most fair and balanced monkey scrotum coverage I’ve ever seen.
John Gibson: “We’re talking about Eric Holder on the radio today and his bright blue scrotum.” That’s what Gibson said, word for word. Why do we permit an asshole like Ruppert Murdoch to dominate our media? Why don’t boycott every outlet he owns? All of it. Fox News, your local Fox affiliate. Fox Sports Net. All of it. Boycott the outlets and boycott their advertisers. Fucking assholes. Fucking idiots. Fuck them all.
Hey, kids! BBS is a serious and painful condition. I got it from XXXXX-McXXXX, more than once, in college in the sixties. The pain can spread and persist for hours and hours, until relieved charitable actions of XXXXX-McXXXX.
Call me, honey!
Eat a bag of blue scrotums, Fox.
Gibson’s comment was awful, but it was also bad when a partner at Eric Holder’s firm, Covington & Burling joked about his pet at a staff meeting about racially offensive language. Was Holder a coward for not saying anything about this? A black attorney there wrote about this incident: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/yolanda-young/what-eric-holders-tenure_b_161104.html
While Gibson is a walking pile of excrement, I don’t think he intended anything more than a pathetic attempt at 7th-grade humor here. Huh, huh, you said “scrotum,” now let me work that into some kind of segue here about what I’m talking about, Eric Holder. Uh, he has a scrotum, too, huh, huh.
He should be killed to death for stupidity, of course.
i’m no michael steele fan but i gotta wonder what makes him tick. why would he associate himself with these asshole repugs? i mean lookin in the frickin’ mirror dude!!!! sigh…also.
John Gibson never got close enough to a woman to even have blue balls.
Btw, are albino balls pink or white?
Scrotum, scrotum
It’s my wrinkly little bag of skin
Scrotum, scrotum
It’s what I keep my testes in
John Gibson, what a waste of human baawwwls.
The tape is a fake… they chopped off Trace Gallagher’s use of “bright blue scrotum” and tacked it on to the end of Gibson’s comment. Gibson’s actual sentence: “We were talking about Eric Holder today on the radio and his comment that this is a nation of cowards.”
You’ve been punk’d by Huffpo.
the video is doctored.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YEVzFDm4hTI
why do progressives lie?
So I’m guessing that that talking point came out at 8:45?
haha. “you will recognize this monkey because of its blue scrotum”
not “you will recognize this monkey because it’s running around, not in a cage”
so dumb. so dumb you may actually be forced to believe they are not being racist.
if you are a racist anyway.
haha.
Even with the fake video, following the monkey story with the Holder story is still part of a practice of sleazy reporting. Of course they know it and we know it too. The “bright blue scrotum” meme was framed in the “segue.” This is the kind of thing we Wonketeers do all the time, as a comment on the inanity of the news and politics, not pretending to “fair and balanced.”
Have the adults gone into hiding? Faux Snooze should be sent to bed without their dinner.
WHY is Nobama freeing all monkeys to kill our children?!?!??!?!?!?!!?!?!!?!?!?!?!??!?!1!!?
Styrofoam Boots: WIN.
“Even with the fake video, following the monkey story with the Holder story is still part of a practice of sleazy reporting.”
In other words - “Yes, I’m a gullible lefty halfwit, but still…”
It’s the rhetorical equivalent of the noose on the doorknob. “OK, it was a hoax, but still…”
That’s a loser play. Man up.
Dave S.: Word.
Dave S.: Wow Dave, having some identity issues aren’t we.
Now repeat after me… I will believe in half of what I see.. Trust but verify… you guys got scrotumed.. hahahahaha..You’re all too easy man.
Why is this story still here, uncorrected?
DoctorCulturae: Your really trying your best to make this racial. Gibson was coming back from commercial on his own radio show - that’s why he made a comment about how he can’t say scrotum on the airwaves. When he played the Holder audio clip he was addressing HIS show that didn’t hear all that lovely scrotum talk. He was just setting up his next break for his radio audience.
hackradio: The point is he didn’t have to bring the topic up at all. Actually it doesn’t have to do with race at all, it has to do with blending topics together as a tactic which Faux Snorts does all the time.