Wonkette
For the past seven million hours, conservative aggregateur Matt Drudge has been blaring the main headline, “OBAMA MOVES TOWARD ‘SWEDISH MODEL’ FOR BANKS,” replete with a sacrilege photo of the profane Swedish flag. The “Swedish Model” is “code” for the evil thing the Swedish government did in the early 1990s after a major real estate and financial bubble: nationalized the biggest insolvent banks, fixed them, and put them back on the market, the end. In other words, it is basically Red Marxism and Islam combined. And now, free-market fappers Lindsey Graham, his “live-in” John McCain, and even Alan Greenspan — who caused the entire crisis, for fun — are voicing their support for Swedish Communist Revolution!
The right wing as embodied by Matt Drudge fears nothing more than the “Swedish Model,” because it compromises Capitalism, the failed economic system. Hey, “Real America,” look at this gay European thing that the Obama administration might do!
Sweden in the early 1990s took control of its struggling banks in exchange for emergency aid, thus making the taxpayers footing the bill owners of the ultimately valuable assets.
Once the crisis was over, the Swedish state sold off nearly all of the nationalized bank investments, getting back most of the money that had been pumped into the sector.
Chilling. Of course, god forbid the MSM ever question “The One” about his plans to turn the United States into a valueless muslin transvestite colony, in which all of the whites are required by “The Swedish Model” to turn their money over to the blacks.
Oh look, now “The One” has worked his gypsy magic on Ayn Rand’s prodigal son!
In an interview, Mr Greenspan, who for decades was regarded as the high priest of laisser-faire capitalism, said nationalisation could be the least bad option left for policymakers.
”It may be necessary to temporarily nationalise some banks in order to facilitate a swift and orderly restructuring,” he said. “I understand that once in a hundred years this is what you do.”
And who else on the Right is backing Greenspan? Oh, how shocking, looks like “Grahamnesty” and “John MexiCain” are being liberal again:
Lindsey Graham, the Republican senator for South Carolina, says that many of his colleagues, including John McCain, the defeated presidential candidate, agree with his view that nationalisation of some banks should be “on the table”.
Mr Graham says that people across the US accept his argument that it is untenable to keep throwing good money after bad into institutions such as Citigroup and Bank of America, which now have a lower net value than the amount of public funds they have received.
Pfft. We smells a secret plot to give billions of dollars to ACORN when we sees one.
Bank nationalisation gains ground with Republicans [Financial Times]
Greenspan backs bank nationalisation [Financial Times]
i KNEW it! greenspan was wearing his soviet flag pin on his underpants the whole time he was king of capitalism!!!! tricksy tricksy.
I would like to voice my support for the Swedish Fish. Also,.
Hey, here’s a joke that’s funny ; what’s the difference between Ireland and Sweden? Five letters and six months. Er, uh, wait a minute … but you get it, right?
It’s your choice people. Trucknutz or meatballs!
Nationalized banks would pay for a lot of gay abortions….
I know for certain that Swedish girls are some kind of Manchurian mind plot: I can’t look up at them for more than a couple seconds before I’m a drooling idiot….and they speak some kind of foreign language where every second word is “sausage”…mmmmm
1.d4 d5 2.e3 Nf6 3.Bd3 c5 4.c3 Nc6 5.f4
Swedish Models? Huh?
Oh, wait, banking.
So Sven and Inger fooled death. There is no pizza in Sweden.
So Michelle Bachmann was right, then?
Seriously, though, Sweden has banks? The only thing I know about Sweden is that they produce women and that they used to produce bricks on wheels before Ford bought them out and totally killed them.
Why are we giving our banking system to IKEA? Will all my financial services be flat-packed now?
A fate worse than death. Can Rush save us?
Numbat Dundee: There was a time when you could get great swedish meatballs at Ikea, but you had to assemble them at home.
magic titty: The Greenspan Gambit declined?
THEY ARE NOT FREE IN SWEDEN!
Perhaps they can also introduce some of the technological advances that have happened in the European banking industry since 1970 to the US system?
In Sweden, a check clears in an hour. But who in their right mind writes checks these days anyways? I’m sure they have some system like the UK’s “Direct Debit” so your bills get paid automagically. I had barely written any ‘cheques’ ever before I moved to the US.
EnBuenOra: Just wait until they change the name of “Bank of America” to “Skjorgspqorp.”
I smell a plot to secretly destroy the world… which happens to be Linds’ and McLame’s favorite dish, best served cold.
[Insert McWalnut's maniacal laugh here.] Oh wait: HEHNGNN HEHNGNN HEHNGNN HEHNGNN HEHNGNNHEHNGNNHEHNGNNHEHNGNN!!1!11!!!
EnBuenOra: “Perhaps you’d like to take advantage of our Skansgåård mortgages? Or perhaps our Tivølk line of CDs would be more to your liking?”
Obama should totally appoint the swedish bikini team to his cabinet to handle this thing. They’re swedish, and hot, which means they are qualified.
Lindsey was confused. He heard “Swedish models” and thought we were importing Marcus Schenkenberg and Fredrik Ljungberg to stimulate our packages.
No more half measures. Let’s not just nationalize the banks — let’s militarize them. Send John Thain to boot camp (”Listen, maggot! I want to explain to me how to field-strip a toxic mortgage!”), put green camo unis on tells and guards, and let the latter will carry M4s or M16s. That oughta get some of the money out of the vault and into the economy.
SayItWithWookies: Exactly.
After a GIS for “Swedish Models”, I can totally see why this would make Drudge uncomfortable.
This would be a slippery slope. Next it would be single-payer health care, low cost education from pre-K through senior citizens, acting neutral in things that isn’t their business, etc.
Bork! Bork! Bork!
I, for one, find Swedish models stimulating.
Maybe not in an economic way, but still…
If The One wants to turn our banks into Scarlett Johansson, I for one will welcome our new Swedish financiers.
Why is Bill Clinton in that picture?
EnBuenOra: So far, you’ve made the laugh the hardest.
chascates: Yeah, not such a bad thing after all, eh? AND all those Swedish girls. Also.
tiny mexican: win. and we’re done.
I was forced to watch The Seventh Seal as part of the freshman curriculum at my librul arts college in 1987. Only now, as of this blog posting, has a knowledge of that film paid off. Jim Newell, you complete me.
V572625694: Okay, you’re making my laugh harder. Way to go, wonkette, this is a great topic. Anyone notice, however, that the Repugtard plan would give the capitalists the money but not cut the taxpayer into the deal? I guess that’s what keeps the plan from being gay or communist, or whatever it is the wingers are so afraid of.
So, Obama is a socialist then? These Rehtugs are cornfusin’…also
Guppy06: Yes, that was my thought. Only it was like, “Swedish models…mmmm, especially with white-blonde hair…”
If Andrea Mitchell wasn’t of Galavanting in Asia with the president of the state department, she would be so pissed
Some of you may already be doing this but it’s always fun to copy things that mention Drudge derisively such as the above and post it to the box on the lower-right hand side that sez:
SEND NEWS TIPS TO DRUDGE
[ANONYMITY GUARANTEED]
Just so he’ll know people are aware of it, which he enjoys so much.
Meaux: Lucky you. We got subjected to “Ordet.” And the scars linger still.
We are through the looking glass.
I mean, what’s wrong with kowtowing to a country that invented both meatballs and the penis pump? HENNGH?
EnBuenOra: I guess this means we’ll have to build our banks by hands with only a bunch of diagrams to show us how to build it.
“Sweden in the early 1990s took control of its struggling banks in exchange for emergency aid, thus making the taxpayers footing the bill owners of the ultimately valuable assets.”
While that is technically a sentence, it took my brain a long, long time to parse it. I might actually do better with Swedish.
tiny mexican: Wind. Beneath. My. Wings.
As the man once said: “I. Wish. Life. Could be. Sweeeeedish Mag-a-zines!”
V572625694: *weeping* God how I love you!
Nice muslin fist bumpin in the pic there. also.
-SP
I want to go to a “laisser-faire” this weekend. Instead of beer wenches and blacksmythes we’ll dress like spacemen and shoot laissers all over the place. AWSUM!!!1!! Also.
Meaux: The Seventh Seal was a great flick, and a lot funner than I thought it would be.
tiny mexican: I want to go to there!
The Dark Wizard strikes again. Let them say “nationalize” first. It makes them think they had an idea.
Smorgasbord! Obama won’t nationalize US banks: too much risk of inland flooding from all the tears of rednecks. Greenspan, McCain & Graham: Commies? Can’t say I’m entirely shocked … after all, those wingnuts are constantly linking to PRAVDA now - & sadly, it’s never the UFO/Bigfoot/man-with-a-400-pound-goiter stories.
I’ve tried their vodka, saunas, and even their women. I believe with all of my heart that we should let them take over our country.
EnBuenOra: What will we do with all the left-over hex bolts that will now come with every new checking account?
But srsly folks, when hyperventalating pubtards freak out about Sweden all I can think is, wow, there are so many worse places to be. Sweden is one of the most innocuously pleasant places I’ve ever been, about as threatening as the Spanish Inquisition’s comfy chair.
Lascauxcaveman: But the car chase with the Volvos was disappointing.
I initially thought that photo was from Mario Bava’s “Black Sunday,” not from Bergman (which is pretty much how I view this whole banking crisis, come to think of it).
I thought Drudge would like Swedish models: ie, those called Lars and Olaf.
Abba is from Sweden. I think Graham’s support just became self-explanatory.
If we go all Sweden and shit, he’s Senator Dancing Queen from now on. Some good must come from all this suffering.
McCain can be Senator Fernando. And Greenspan is obviously Ex-Fed Chairman Waterloo.
We will save trillions by flat packing our mortgage backed securities for easy transport and storage!
I hung out with two Swedish models once in Germany… a blonde one and a brunet. Both hot as hell. The blonde one looked like a Marine. They liked to cook in tandem; it was the oddest thing watching them do their Swedish voodoo half-naked over a single-burner camp stove.
Ugh… what were we talking about?
Sweden is four times awesome.
I just saw a House Hunters International episode on the teevee, with two blond 40-something Swedish lesbos buying a cool apartment in Stockholm. They rocked and I was convinced more than ever that the love between two women is a beautiful thing….especially if captured by a HD camera.
Thank you Sweden for your fiscal prudence and hot lesbian vikings!
AnnieGetYourFun: I can has commas?
Sweden is the new France.
masterdebater: Not like they could do worse, amirite?
whiskey tango foxtrot: I am not worthy. Or spelling well today, and it’s not even Martini time yet.
queeraselvis v 2.0: I liked the Seventh Seal, but my favorite Bergman is “Smiles of a Summer Night.” But then, I’m old.
You would think that at some point some wingtard would be caught, off camera, finally saying what I’ve wanted to hear since grad school turned me into a commie: “It’s time we admit that, after over a hundred years of bubbles, runs and depressions that capitalism is a failed system. It’s time we moved on to something that might actually work.”
But this latest news is probably as close to that dream as I’ll ever get so I’ll take it. For now.
hobospacejungle: Aw, jeeze. It’s not Capitalism that has failed, it’s this stoopid Chicago School notion that Capitalism can’t have any rules, else it makes baby jeezus cry.
Why is this so hard for us plebes to get? Just hunker down a bit with this concept, and yes! You too, America! May be a great country someday, like Sweden, Norway, Denmark or maybe even Canada City.
I believe that Sweden sold the shares they had nationalized at a profit. At least that’s what their government claims. Of course, it’s the same government that allows you to paint your subsidized housing one of three colors, all of which are shades of beige. Like the rest of ours, there also is a shadow side to the Scandinavian soul. You get blonde, but you have to give beige.