SEXY MAMAS  1:40 pm February 18, 2009

Sexy Ladies of the Great Depression

by Ken Layne

Hawt!That Daily Kos blogger with delusions of being Dorothea Lange got us thinking … about how HAWT all those Depression Gals were, compared to, say, America’s current underclass. Amoral affair-having cancer-patient-exploiting day-trading parasitic hack David Denby will surely peck out a very outraged booklet, for Jezebel, about this Children’s Treasury of Dorothea’s Lange’s Sexiest Photographs. But first, he will masturbate to them.

Prêt-à-Porter
Great Depression, or French Vogue?

The Picnic.
We can’t prove this is an intentional homage to Manet’s Le Dejeuner sur l’Herbe, but if old Edouard was still around in 1920s, he could’ve sued the fuck out of Dorothea Lange — or FDR, maybe. The sumptuous Parisian feast is replaced, here, by breast milk and sorrow.

Cheer up, this Depression will end when you're about 28 years old!
Here’s a sad picture of a poor girl in New Mexico, during the (you guessed it!) Great Depression. WPA photographers favored moody “black and white” photography during this era. Artists! This was one of the earliest photo shoots featuring supermodel Kate Moss.

Dorothea Lange ... or Jessica Lange?It wouldn’t be a Dorothea Lange gallery without her favorite model, this gorgeous mom. Those cheekbones! If Americans start looking half this fine during the New Depression, let’s just hope it lands for twenty years.

We’re all out of space, so we can’t use this Depression-era classic of superstar “Madonna.”

 

Hola wonkerados.

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{ 51 comments }

Lascauxcaveman February 18, 2009 at 1:44 pm

Eh, she’s no Walker Evans.

Red Zeppelin February 18, 2009 at 1:45 pm

It’s cuz the bitters are all fatties now, on account of Big Gulps and whatnot.

Doglessliberal February 18, 2009 at 1:46 pm

This surely must be the first time in history “Dorothea Lange” and “masturbate” were used together. (I hope so, actually). Throw in “parasitic hack” and that is a 100% certainty.

randomsausage February 18, 2009 at 1:46 pm

mmmmmmm….me likey desperate needy women. More pics please.

Doglessliberal February 18, 2009 at 1:48 pm

oh, and “Depresso Porn”? “Poverty Porn”? I am sure there is already a “Hunger Porn” or “Anorexia Porn”, so we need to be more specific here than just starving women.

Gopherit February 18, 2009 at 1:48 pm

[re=246117]Red Zeppelin[/re]: Laugh now, but those fat layers will be their saving grace when even the hobo beans run out.

Doglessliberal February 18, 2009 at 1:50 pm

[re=246116]Lascauxcaveman[/re]: Speaking of photos, if you are in the DC area, you have to check ourt the Scurlock exhibit at the National Musuem of Am History. It is really wonderful.
http://americanhistory.si.edu/exhibitions/exhibition.cfm?key=38&exkey=1260

Tommmcatt February 18, 2009 at 1:50 pm

[re=246120]randomsausage[/re]:

You should TOTALLY move to L.A., dude.

DustBowlBlues February 18, 2009 at 1:51 pm

My aunt who survived the Dust Bowl on a farm in the OK Panhandle (the epicenter of the Dust Bowl) said they used to hang wet sheets over the walls–not just the windows, people, the walls–and still there would be an inch of everything after a dust storm.

It was very sad, though I guess Daily Kos is okay on it because of all the great art. Of course, won’t be much art in the stimulus, thanks to Oklahoma’s own cretin senator, Tom Coburn. No fucking cultural shit, that’s Spooky Tom Coburn’s motto.

Tommy Says Soooo February 18, 2009 at 1:52 pm

Depression? Come back, Elizabeth Wurtzel, all is forgiven. Just don’t cut me.

cal February 18, 2009 at 1:52 pm

Today, these women would all be strippers.

user-of-owls February 18, 2009 at 1:53 pm

How depressing to consider the likely response of the current day guardians of morality if the Obama administration funded the sort of vile smut represented in the third photo. Historically, didn’t the Enlightenment post-date the Dark Ages? *sigh*

jodyleek February 18, 2009 at 1:54 pm

[re=246129]DustBowlBlues[/re]: Oklahoma – the dusty armpit of the nation.

bitchincamaro February 18, 2009 at 1:54 pm

And who could forget Jack Nicholson banging Jessica Lange in that James Kane novel/movie? She sold more just pie in that diner scene. And the “Lange” thing? Coincidence? You decide.

SayItWithWookies February 18, 2009 at 1:56 pm

I can’t wait for Playboy’s “Women of the Dust Bowl” spread.

tehbenton February 18, 2009 at 1:56 pm

[re=246123]Doglessliberal[/re]: Rule 34, m’dear. There’s porn for everything.

Serolf Divad February 18, 2009 at 1:56 pm

Man I wish I lived in the Great Depression with all that hot tail. They were skinny, too!

randomsausage February 18, 2009 at 1:57 pm

[re=246131]cal[/re]: All women ARE strippers. It’s a theory of mine. You just have to find the right music track and every woman will strip, once their track will is played. I’ve had my 80GB iPod on Shuffle for 3 years, in the expectation that this will happen one day, when zee lady friends of Mrs Randomsausage come a-calling.

Red Zeppelin February 18, 2009 at 1:58 pm

These women are gorgeous, but it’s the go-go dancers gif that really turns my crank. It’s kind of weird, because even the dancing girls are older than my mother. I think it’s time to start drinking.

Doglessliberal February 18, 2009 at 2:00 pm

[re=246137]tehbenton[/re]: shudder….

Doglessliberal February 18, 2009 at 2:02 pm

[re=246140]randomsausage[/re]: That is a very dog-like attitude: “I will be patient and hopeful, someone will pet/feed/play with me; every passerby is a potential feeder/petter/player.”

tunamelt February 18, 2009 at 2:02 pm

[re=246127]Tommmcatt[/re]: Oh, come on, man. We’re not that desperate.

I mean, do you think I’m that desperate?

Because I’m totally not.

I mean, though, but seriously, what do you think? I mean, really? Am I that desperate?

Fuck.

Servo February 18, 2009 at 2:04 pm

What’s really disturbing is that Repukes would rather have that all over again than alter their narrow minds, just to display their “integrity”.

Mr Blifil February 18, 2009 at 2:08 pm

Hobo Hotties.

Hooray For Anything February 18, 2009 at 2:12 pm

Considering most of the women in the picture look like they haven’t eaten in weeks, it could very well be pictures in French Vogue. In fact, if we do enter the Great Depression and nobody could eat, there’d be lots more contestants for Americas Top Model.

Hooray For Anything February 18, 2009 at 2:12 pm

[re=246131]cal[/re]: But how could they afford to pay for all the fake boob jobs?

Lionel Hutz Esq. February 18, 2009 at 2:13 pm

You should put up a few pictures of Ann Coulter, Paris Hilton and a shaved Brittney Spears so we can see how we have progressed over the years.

Dave J. February 18, 2009 at 2:14 pm

[re=246140]randomsausage[/re]: If the strip club my, um, friend likes to visit in the Portland, OR area is any guide, you should start playing more Portishead, Jawbreaker, and MIA.

jagorev February 18, 2009 at 2:17 pm

I’d hit #1 and #3

TGY February 18, 2009 at 2:17 pm

Amazing. Starvation makes people thinner.

tunamelt February 18, 2009 at 2:22 pm

[re=246172]jagorev[/re]: Domestic violence is not okay.

heroinmule February 18, 2009 at 2:23 pm

That twat Denby was on Morning Edition yesterday. He says he can date snark all the way back to the Romans (hennnghhh? that old?). Apparently snark leads to…hundreds of years of prosperity (unless you’re a slave from Gaul) and cultural/imperial rule. What a shame that would be if America suffered the same fate (we won’t, our abortion of empire will probably resemble Spain’s)!

There is nothing I hate more than a sloppy, lazy scholar.

Lascauxcaveman February 18, 2009 at 2:29 pm

[re=246167]Lionel Hutz Esq.[/re]: *Gagh* (Um, dude, I’m trying to eat my lunch here, if you don’t mind.)

PolicyWhore February 18, 2009 at 2:39 pm

Moar!

randomsausage February 18, 2009 at 2:42 pm

[re=246147]Doglessliberal[/re]: Prof Randomsausage’s other theory is that zee ladies are just as orgasm-addicted as us guys. We don’t think about that though because generally speaking women reject the one night stand in favor of the ‘relationship’, the long term commitment.

My hypothesis is that zee lady-folk are not doing that because they want to fall in love or anything. They do it because orgasms are more difficult for them to have and they need time – i.e. a relationship – in order to “train us up” to give them the Big O.

Controversial?

Cesar Px February 18, 2009 at 2:43 pm

[re=246169]Dave J.[/re]: Mary’s Club?

chascates February 18, 2009 at 2:45 pm

[re=246129]DustBowlBlues[/re]: Here’s a picture of the town in the Texas panhandle I grew up in (Photo of approaching dust storm, 1935):
http://www.freebase.com/view/wikipedia/images/en_id/527844
I’ve taken down old houses to reuse the wood and they were packed full of the finest dust you can imagine. Even without the dust bowl you can leave your vehicle with the windows rolled up and still come out after a spring wind and find dust over the entire inside of it.

Dave J. February 18, 2009 at 2:48 pm

[re=246241]Cesar Px[/re]: Way too upscale. Hawthorne Strip FTW!

groove February 18, 2009 at 2:59 pm

[re=246188]heroinmule[/re]: I heard that Denby interview on Morning Edition as well. I remember being extremely tired, not wanting to get up to go to work (for the time being). And then this douche starts spewing his tardisms and instantly I’m up and out of there.

The limits to my absolute love affair I have with sleeping are seldom ever reached. It is a testament to Denby’s obnoxiousness to have me hit these limits in a record time of 5 seconds.

magic titty February 18, 2009 at 3:12 pm

[re=246172]jagorev[/re]: ha. #1 seems like a modern photo – i’m not buying it as Depression-era.

Bowdoin February 18, 2009 at 3:37 pm

Wonder if they can walk a runway in 8″ heels. That’s the test of emaciated sad.

assistant/atlas February 18, 2009 at 4:11 pm

Jeez, people seemed so depressed back then. I mean, come on. It’s not like the country was in a….oh. Great Depression. Nevermind.

[re=246127]Tommmcatt[/re]: HA! Nice. And sad. And true, also.

Capitol Hillbilly February 18, 2009 at 4:13 pm

i haz a boehner

podunk February 18, 2009 at 4:13 pm

{lyrics band=”barkmarket”}
poverty is a period piece
it’s so black
it’s so white
it’s so black and white
{/lyrics}

Lionel Hutz Esq. February 18, 2009 at 4:34 pm

[re=246203]Lascauxcaveman[/re]: I’m trying to lose weight myself.

Still, it would be an interesting comparison. Those who are deathly thin because of the failure of agriculture versus those who are deathly thin because they have a lot of money.

hobospacejungle February 18, 2009 at 4:50 pm

[re=246249]chascates[/re]: Jesus christ man, run for the fucking hills! I thought a dust storm I sat through in El Paso (filled the house with dust despite all doors & windows being closed) was godawful.

[re=246172]jagorev[/re]: Amen to that. Hawt is hawt.

c-freak February 18, 2009 at 5:24 pm

if the theme is dust bowls & okies, where’s the artsy photo of sally kern’s vag?

azw88 February 18, 2009 at 6:01 pm

So Facebook bans breastfeeding, but the Wonkette allows it?? WTF! Get with it, Wonkette! You are a social networking site, you are supposed to protect us from such vile images!

Scandalabra February 18, 2009 at 7:45 pm

My depression era grandmother, (married 1934), carried that look all the way into the 1990s. It works as well with a pearl necklace and ultrasuede as it does with sack cloth.

lawrenceofthedesert February 19, 2009 at 2:47 pm

In the age of snark, all the photos will be in sepia.

zirconia February 20, 2009 at 12:46 pm

[re=246238]randomsausage[/re]:

Ahhh, you GET us. I love you.

Down, boy. Sit. Stay. Roll over. Mmmm, roll over again. Like that. Yes.

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