sexy mamas

Sexy Ladies of the Great Depression

Hawt!That Daily Kos blogger with delusions of being Dorothea Lange got us thinking … about how HAWT all those Depression Gals were, compared to, say, America’s current underclass. Amoral affair-having cancer-patient-exploiting day-trading parasitic hack David Denby will surely peck out a very outraged booklet, for Jezebel, about this Children’s Treasury of Dorothea’s Lange’s Sexiest Photographs. But first, he will masturbate to them.

Prêt-à-Porter
Great Depression, or French Vogue?

The Picnic.
We can’t prove this is an intentional homage to Manet’s Le Dejeuner sur l’Herbe, but if old Edouard was still around in 1920s, he could’ve sued the fuck out of Dorothea Lange — or FDR, maybe. The sumptuous Parisian feast is replaced, here, by breast milk and sorrow.

Cheer up, this Depression will end when you're about 28 years old!
Here’s a sad picture of a poor girl in New Mexico, during the (you guessed it!) Great Depression. WPA photographers favored moody “black and white” photography during this era. Artists! This was one of the earliest photo shoots featuring supermodel Kate Moss.

Dorothea Lange ... or Jessica Lange?It wouldn’t be a Dorothea Lange gallery without her favorite model, this gorgeous mom. Those cheekbones! If Americans start looking half this fine during the New Depression, let’s just hope it lands for twenty years.

Sponsored Video

We’re all out of space, so we can’t use this Depression-era classic of superstar “Madonna.”

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About the author

A writer and editor of this website from 2006 to early 2012, Ken Layne is occassionally seen on Twitter and writes small books and is already haunting you from beyond (your) grave.

View all articles by Ken Layne

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51 comments

  1. Doglessliberal

    This surely must be the first time in history “Dorothea Lange” and “masturbate” were used together. (I hope so, actually). Throw in “parasitic hack” and that is a 100% certainty.

  2. Doglessliberal

    oh, and “Depresso Porn”? “Poverty Porn”? I am sure there is already a “Hunger Porn” or “Anorexia Porn”, so we need to be more specific here than just starving women.

  3. Gopherit

    [re=246117]Red Zeppelin[/re]: Laugh now, but those fat layers will be their saving grace when even the hobo beans run out.

  4. DustBowlBlues

    My aunt who survived the Dust Bowl on a farm in the OK Panhandle (the epicenter of the Dust Bowl) said they used to hang wet sheets over the walls–not just the windows, people, the walls–and still there would be an inch of everything after a dust storm.

    It was very sad, though I guess Daily Kos is okay on it because of all the great art. Of course, won’t be much art in the stimulus, thanks to Oklahoma’s own cretin senator, Tom Coburn. No fucking cultural shit, that’s Spooky Tom Coburn’s motto.

  5. user-of-owls

    How depressing to consider the likely response of the current day guardians of morality if the Obama administration funded the sort of vile smut represented in the third photo. Historically, didn’t the Enlightenment post-date the Dark Ages? *sigh*

  6. bitchincamaro

    And who could forget Jack Nicholson banging Jessica Lange in that James Kane novel/movie? She sold more just pie in that diner scene. And the “Lange” thing? Coincidence? You decide.

  7. randomsausage

    [re=246131]cal[/re]: All women ARE strippers. It’s a theory of mine. You just have to find the right music track and every woman will strip, once their track will is played. I’ve had my 80GB iPod on Shuffle for 3 years, in the expectation that this will happen one day, when zee lady friends of Mrs Randomsausage come a-calling.

  8. Red Zeppelin

    These women are gorgeous, but it’s the go-go dancers gif that really turns my crank. It’s kind of weird, because even the dancing girls are older than my mother. I think it’s time to start drinking.

  9. Doglessliberal

    [re=246140]randomsausage[/re]: That is a very dog-like attitude: “I will be patient and hopeful, someone will pet/feed/play with me; every passerby is a potential feeder/petter/player.”

  10. tunamelt

    [re=246127]Tommmcatt[/re]: Oh, come on, man. We’re not that desperate.

    I mean, do you think I’m that desperate?

    Because I’m totally not.

    I mean, though, but seriously, what do you think? I mean, really? Am I that desperate?

    Fuck.

  11. Servo

    What’s really disturbing is that Repukes would rather have that all over again than alter their narrow minds, just to display their “integrity”.

  12. Hooray For Anything

    Considering most of the women in the picture look like they haven’t eaten in weeks, it could very well be pictures in French Vogue. In fact, if we do enter the Great Depression and nobody could eat, there’d be lots more contestants for Americas Top Model.

  13. Lionel Hutz Esq.

    You should put up a few pictures of Ann Coulter, Paris Hilton and a shaved Brittney Spears so we can see how we have progressed over the years.

  14. Dave J.

    [re=246140]randomsausage[/re]: If the strip club my, um, friend likes to visit in the Portland, OR area is any guide, you should start playing more Portishead, Jawbreaker, and MIA.

  15. heroinmule

    That twat Denby was on Morning Edition yesterday. He says he can date snark all the way back to the Romans (hennnghhh? that old?). Apparently snark leads to…hundreds of years of prosperity (unless you’re a slave from Gaul) and cultural/imperial rule. What a shame that would be if America suffered the same fate (we won’t, our abortion of empire will probably resemble Spain’s)!

    There is nothing I hate more than a sloppy, lazy scholar.

  16. Lascauxcaveman

    [re=246167]Lionel Hutz Esq.[/re]: *Gagh* (Um, dude, I’m trying to eat my lunch here, if you don’t mind.)

  17. randomsausage

    [re=246147]Doglessliberal[/re]: Prof Randomsausage’s other theory is that zee ladies are just as orgasm-addicted as us guys. We don’t think about that though because generally speaking women reject the one night stand in favor of the ‘relationship’, the long term commitment.

    My hypothesis is that zee lady-folk are not doing that because they want to fall in love or anything. They do it because orgasms are more difficult for them to have and they need time – i.e. a relationship – in order to “train us up” to give them the Big O.

    Controversial?

  18. chascates

    [re=246129]DustBowlBlues[/re]: Here’s a picture of the town in the Texas panhandle I grew up in (Photo of approaching dust storm, 1935):
    http://www.freebase.com/view/wikipedia/images/en_id/527844
    I’ve taken down old houses to reuse the wood and they were packed full of the finest dust you can imagine. Even without the dust bowl you can leave your vehicle with the windows rolled up and still come out after a spring wind and find dust over the entire inside of it.

  19. groove

    [re=246188]heroinmule[/re]: I heard that Denby interview on Morning Edition as well. I remember being extremely tired, not wanting to get up to go to work (for the time being). And then this douche starts spewing his tardisms and instantly I’m up and out of there.

    The limits to my absolute love affair I have with sleeping are seldom ever reached. It is a testament to Denby’s obnoxiousness to have me hit these limits in a record time of 5 seconds.

  20. magic titty

    [re=246172]jagorev[/re]: ha. #1 seems like a modern photo – i’m not buying it as Depression-era.

  21. assistant/atlas

    Jeez, people seemed so depressed back then. I mean, come on. It’s not like the country was in a….oh. Great Depression. Nevermind.

    [re=246127]Tommmcatt[/re]: HA! Nice. And sad. And true, also.

  22. podunk

    {lyrics band=”barkmarket”}
    poverty is a period piece
    it’s so black
    it’s so white
    it’s so black and white
    {/lyrics}

  23. Lionel Hutz Esq.

    [re=246203]Lascauxcaveman[/re]: I’m trying to lose weight myself.

    Still, it would be an interesting comparison. Those who are deathly thin because of the failure of agriculture versus those who are deathly thin because they have a lot of money.

  24. hobospacejungle

    [re=246249]chascates[/re]: Jesus christ man, run for the fucking hills! I thought a dust storm I sat through in El Paso (filled the house with dust despite all doors & windows being closed) was godawful.

    [re=246172]jagorev[/re]: Amen to that. Hawt is hawt.

  25. azw88

    So Facebook bans breastfeeding, but the Wonkette allows it?? WTF! Get with it, Wonkette! You are a social networking site, you are supposed to protect us from such vile images!

  26. Scandalabra

    My depression era grandmother, (married 1934), carried that look all the way into the 1990s. It works as well with a pearl necklace and ultrasuede as it does with sack cloth.

  27. zirconia

    [re=246238]randomsausage[/re]:

    Ahhh, you GET us. I love you.

    Down, boy. Sit. Stay. Roll over. Mmmm, roll over again. Like that. Yes.

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