Wonkette
Here’s a preview of former Illinois Gov. “Rod” Blagojevich on tonight’s episode of the David Letterman show. This may have been a step too far for Blago — in case you forgot, he has a real trial coming up, for “criminal” charges — because Letterman at 89 years old is still rather deft at asking certain folks, in the most awkward of ways, why they would appear on his show with 2-ton bindles of bullshit slung over their shoulders. [YouTube]
I think Blaggy is innocent.
But he should still be locked away for life for being a pretentious,
grandstanding asshat!
Bored with his schtick. Next!
I think his wife changed the locks. He can’t go home and he’s got no cash for a hotel.
I miss ya peaches — I mean Blago. Actually, I don’t miss ya. Har the funniest thing I ever saws waz a tv station touting an EXCLUSIVE interview with Blag-oy-o-mess. That’s got to be the least exclusive exclusive in the history of exclusivity.
There is a small Levenstein distance between tout and taint. Two, I think.
Rene Descarte was a drunken fart I drink therefore I am.
Ha ha, Letterman starts off the interview with a list of other Illinois pols who were convicted of crimes. “Is this part of the oath of office”?
And Blago just sits there. Priceless.
Czn939: I don’t think you spell pretentious pretentious. Of course, I might be being pretentious.
My gosh, I saw flesh at the base of that part! It really isn’t just a cap on his brain.
Warren Terror: Ok, we get it: you can copy and paste very efficiently. Stop being pretentious.
Gawd, Blago makes me so uncomfortable.
Fame must be a screaming monkey bitch! Does he think he can rise again, Phoenix-like, as Sarah Palin is doing? Is he getting anything other than union scale for these appearances? Or are Americans just so valueless they’ll enable this behavior by watching it?
Does the bear shit in the woods? Was the Pope a Nazi?
he hops. he’s a little hoppy bunny. with hair hiding a gigantic hole in his forehead. where he used to keep rene descartes. i would like to see little hoppy with a nice jarhead ‘do.
Wait, so this Letter Man character is snarky? To people’s faces? And HAS BEEN for 75 years on the televisions? SOMEONE SEND A TELEGRAM BOY TO INFORM DAVID DENBY!!! THERE ARE NEW CHAPTERS TO BE WRITTEN!!!!
loudmouthredhead: Lick my mouse. You pretentious fuck.
loudmouthredhead: Wait, do I lose posting rights for flaming or apologizing? First, I apologize for not apologizing in a situation in which apologizing might be considered inappropriate but I have not apologized in that instance.
Then again, if an apology is called for, good luck because you’re going to be calling a long fucking time. Oh, wait, is that an inappropriate attitude?
And my dad was a troll, not me. Just ask my mother.
Warren Terror: What the fuck are you talking about?
Well, I think, when all is said and done, Carthage must be destroyed.
Well, he talked about part of the reason for the impeachment being not wanting to raise income taxes. He should change parties.
PALIN/BLAGO 2012!
Is Warren Terror gonna start dropping N-bombs and calling us kikes? Will shorts then have him banned from the interwebs? Things are getting pretty darn rough and tumble on the warblogs tonight, yesiree.
Blago is on the show in the worst way.
Warren Terror: is on this blogo in the worst way
undermedicated: I am just going to lick my balls and pretend this never happened. Arf.
I’d like to see Blago and Charles Manson interview each other — the intersection of two sociopaths would probably be pretty interesting. As long as they didn’t both go whackdoodle incoherent at the same time.
El Kabong: Wait a tick… You guys are … One moment… one moment… Dave… I’m out of alcohol.
Jeebus, a FreeCreditReportDotCom commercial is on… oxygen… losing consciousness….
JeffGoldblum: Go easy on him. He’s CussingNews’s nerdy high-functioning autistic brother. With moderate Tourette’s.
I’m ashamed of you all. Clearly, you’re slipping. It’s very clear that Warren Terror is drunk.
And really, if anyone would know inebriation, it’s The Wonkette Nation (TM).
Next step: a reality show where he shares an apartment with Kwame Kilpatrick.
If only there were more Blagos around, the world would be a much better place. He’s like MLK, Gandhi, and Nelson Mandela all rolled into one human toupee.
http://democralypsenow.blogspot.com/2009/02/which-one-of-these-things-does-not_03.html
Is it a sign of how lame our culture is that real life is funnier/weirder than our fiction? Or is it a sign of how lame our real life is?
SayItWithWookies: That would just be the tops, wouldn’t it?
SayItWithWookies: My money is on Blago. I think even Manson would back away and say, “Woah, this guy is fuckin’ nuts”
Blago on Letterman twirling his cufflinks like they waz marbles..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O9KlQPX1qiE
I’m ashamed of you all. Clearly, you’re slipping. It’s very clear that Warren Terror is drunk David Denby.
Fixed it for you.
I propose that Blago start writing a Blag. First topic: why do they call it a “penal” system?
Finally, someone (My Wonkette) calls Blago “Rod”, with quotation marks.
I am a big believer that he should always be referred to by Radovan instead of Rod. In fact, as hard as the wingnuts worked to call Barry by his Full Foreign Name over the past year, I can’t believe that they haven’t started calling him Radovan.
hageesheart: BadKitty: Hell, I’m thinking Coliseum matches, crazy-ass debate style. Blago vs. Manson to start, then the winner gets Donald Rumsfeld. Then Karl Rove. Then James Dobson. Then…Cheney.
FUCCCCKKK…
It’s “Milorad”, not “Radovan”.
I done got my Serbian names mixed up! OH THE HORROR!
Blago is unemployed. He has a demanding wife. She says “eff ‘em” to the Cubs! She’s got something much worse for his deadbeat ass. He needs a job ASAP.
So instead of paying $3mm for thirty seconds, like monster.com or Ladders, Blago puts his living resume on the talk shows for freebies. It’s ‘effin’ golden. There’s more than one defense contractor thinking about what a balls-to-the-wall psychotically aggressive shameless salesman Blago could be. And he’s got a stuffed rolodex. Rahm not only calls him, they do lunch. Golden, I tell you.
Next up for Letterman’s cross examination: Dubs, Darth, Rummy, Gonzales, and RUSH!
SayItWithWookies: Blago v Palin. Cage Death Match.
First one to complete a grammatical sentence walks out a free psychopath.
It’s just not the same without somebody hurling excoriating invective at us for being kikes.
Those were good times.
jesus charlie crist, can blahhgoh please sit still. He thinks he has issues with his hemorroids now, just wait until “Bubba” the rehabilitator gets through with him. (rimshot ,ride tsssssss).
Anyone see the TNR article that says yeah sure, Blago is bad but COLEMAN is worse;
http://www.tnr.com/story_print.html?id=5d0983bf-2658-48c9-b449-0a0e9a7621e5
Excerpt; I can’t think of a good reason why Rod Blagojevich has become the most hated man in America while Norm Coleman still walks the streets with his head held high.
What if he’s like totally innocent? That would be so #$%^&*(#$%^&*(&^%$#ing awesome!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I gotta say, I’m really hoping this dude gets off. His audacity has won me over.
Gotta admit it — Blago is a ballsy little sociopath. He may be a sleazeball, but I’ll always be grateful for the knob-twisting he gave Harry Reid.
thongthongthong:
I think Coleman should welcome a conviction. A conviction is a Republican PhD.
Heywood Floyd: agreed! And he’s about the most entertaining public figure right now. Normally, the people who have these kind of meltdowns are drug-addled, brain-dead “musicians” whose managers can whisk them off to rehab before they say anything too stupid. Blagojevich is a) far more articulate and b) has no one to drag him away to rehab. Trucknutz for everyone!
I’m hoping he get his own reality t.v. show. Especially if he’s in prison.
villageatrois: Oh man, I just imagined Joe Plumber and Blago together telling me how to unscrew my rabbit ears and whatever that shit is with TVs and pattering. Or Joe the Plumber and Blago in Gaza or the Pashtun hills interviewing dead children. If either of these things happens I am selling my computer and moving to a farm.
HOLY SHIT. HOLY MOTHER OF GOD. HE IS A NIGHTMARE OF HILARIOUS PROPORTIONS.
hahaha “why not wait until the appropriate time to prove it?”
“I HAVE TWO LITTLE GIRLS THAT WOULD NOT HAVE HEALTHCARE IF I DID NOT SPEAK UP ON EVERY TALK SHOW.”
hahahaha HE USED THE INCOME TAX LINE, TOO? holy shit this is incredible.
I don’t think a politician since George Ryan has done this, and he did it with a bit more gusto… such as allowing your lawyer to speak for you. But HEY. This is great too. Even better! Whoo hoo!! *fart*
Damned recession/depression. I’ve had to cut back on alcohol consumption in order to maintain the proper levels of my 4:20 medication. Suddenly Blago-yeah-bitch doesn’t seem funny at all. [shudder] Oh loathsome economy, why hast thou broke-ed me?
Awesome, he fidgets all about while Letterman goes through the laundry list of convicted Governors. At the end, he reaches over to nervously adjust the position of his coffee cup.
GUILTY
Magnus Maximus: He’s not worried about being guilty. He’s worried about your taxes going up, also. He is worried about rising health care costs, and the new Illinois agenda. THIS IS SERIOUS BIZNESS. WAKE UP SHEEPLE. ALSO.
Is it wrong to be reading about blago in a strip club? At leadt i’m drinking.
It is a big mistake to go on Letterman trying to peddle bullshit or thinking you can out think Dave. Letterman really doesn’t like people that are too full of themselves, and if you piss him off, he can tear you apart and have people laughing with him as he does so. Letterman (and Stewart and Colbert, for that matter), is not Greta Van Sustren or Glen Beck.
Let’s all just have a community gangbang on him, for the children.
Uncle Glenny: I think it is very interesting that Blago’s defense is pure Republican. One party Ann Coulter (Bat Shit Crazy/I’m the real victim here of the Democrats) to one part Limbaugh (they all want to raise your taxes, that is why they hate me).
So I’m figuring that he is really a tranny with a major drug problem.
Prove me wrong, people. Prove me wrong.
IceCreamEmpress: Denby was never that witty. I think there was a little miscommunication between Warren Terror and loudmouthredhead, loudmouthredhead was being snarky, and Warren missed it, much like our dear friend Mr. Denby. However, I would be willing to drink or fuck either one, if it would help. (I’m very lonely).
SayItWithWookies: How ’bout Hannity? He had some black minister on who answered a question about Tom Deschel’s taxes by saying that Obama was elected because 96% of blacks are racist and 80% of whites are guilty, and this is why Obama is going to make us all Socialists. And Hannity defeneded this. The best part is that they had Ashleigh Banford on, who will probably never be back because she called Hannity on his Bull, and then asked at the end of the segment what any of that had to do with Tom Deschel paying his taxes. I think Hannity and Blago would start to make out after five minutes of listening to each others delusional world view.
Magnus Maximus: You would fidget too if you had images of George Ryan violently pegging your ass in prison.
shortsshortsshorts: Also, see my reply to Uncle Glenny. Also.
Oops, forgot!
(looks at camera, smiles wanly)
shortsshortsshorts: As long as it is for the children. And the Pandas. Also.
Lionel Hutz Esq.: In his poor, lackluster and utterly pathetic way, WE ARE THE MASSIVE EVILS SAYING “Whip him again, Sergeant Pilot.” I feel like washing my hands for some reason. And then we should have him whipped, again. Also.
Oh and there is no hope for humanity, also.
And spanking, also.
bago: Yes. also.
shortsshortsshorts: And then the oral sex?
Shut up girlfriends! This is an all-X-chromosome blog! “Rod” doesn’t approve of all this bad language around girls!
I love Blago and will continue loving him until his innocence is proved up in a court of law. Even then I will still love him. Let Freedom Ring!
Blago? Fuck him and the horse he road out on. Dead to me.
Paul Schaefer, watch your back! (and your wallet)…
I couldn’t watch the video because it said “Not available in your country or domain.” I blame NBC. We get Letterman here, but about a month late. I’m still watching “Great moments in Presidential Speeches.” I don’t understand the logic behind this at all.
Warren Terror: Australia, Australia, Australia, we love you!
johnbpt: Really, though, ain’t that just too easy? Like twisting a doorknob (you know, one that was created for the sole purpose of being twisted)?
Oh, great, now I’m going to get a strongly worded letter from our Mormon bishop. Followed by stern looks. And then nothing.
I don’t represent unless the cause is a no-brainer.
This latest Bushite-era fucking-teh-poor-in-the-ass scandal has a local angle for POLL-WINNING Wonkette. It concerns a predatory Maryland lender, the Urban Trust Bank of Bethesda, that preys on the working poor and people of color with bad credit and started by Bob Johnson, founder of B.E.T. and majority owner of the Charlotte Hornets. In 2005 he started selling SUBPRIME “Salute Visa” credit cards though CompuCredit of Atlanta, the greedy parasites who had to pay the FTC $217 million in restitution last year for “deceptive card charges.”
After four years of making billions off these “fee-gathering” credit cards, millions of SUBPRIME cardholders (including me) got a letter from UTB and CompuCredit. After paying them over $760 in fees on time and never missing a payment to rebuild my credit rating, they just ZEROED MY BALANCESTOPPED THE PROGRAM. Phhhppppffft. Funnily enough, this decision was made the same week that NY Rep. Carolyn Maloney’s Credit Cardholders’ Bill of Rights of 2008 passed the House 312-112, shielding consumers from just the kind of usurious thievery UTB and CompuCredit were engaged in at that very moment.
Please tell any UTB/CompuCreditt cardholders you know to read and sign this petition to the AG’s of GA and MD. You can read the sordid facts from PBS Frontline there. Bill Moyers reports that it will get worse: CompuCredit recently signed a “co-branding” deal with no less than the Southern Christian Leadership Conference (!) to sell SCLC SUBPRIME credit cards to elderly African-American folks at Atlanta A.M.E.’s.
Does Brother Barry know about this?
I also getting a weird Rupert Pupkin vibe off this guy. Also.
He will not Blago gently into that good night.
With any luck he’ll be found guilty, and go to prison to become someone’s Blagojebitch. Har har.
Heywood: Rupert Pupkin reference for the WIN!
MarieDeGournay: Bibo ergo sum.
All I could think about during that interview was: “Does he dye his hair?”
Does that make me a bitter?