Wonkette
Hooray, because this fucktard’s sell-by date has long since passed: Rod Blagojevich is gone, thrown out by those communist street organizers in the Illinois Senate — by unanimous vote! Good-bye, Blago! You were really the most shameless, annoying political dingus of this young century, and you were never even funny/terrifying like, say, Sarah Palin. Hope you choke on your pubic-hair wig, loser. [Some TV website in Texas?]
Bye, Rod!
As an Illinoisan, I couldn’t be happier.
Having done nothing wrong is the road to prison. Just ask any inmate!
ROD GOT THE SHAFT!
Coming soon: BlagoPAC–to provide funds for his search for the real scoundrals.
Well, don’t forget. Gandhi was impeached once… or something.
Blago… what a piece of work. He’s so dumb that he actually thought no one would ever know. I guess he’s not heard of the Interwebs and the blogsers.
Another good result out of Illinois…finally and none too soon.
Met him once when he was running for Congress. We talked for a few minutes about the Cubs and Elvis while he looked over my sholder for more important people to talk to. He did not have a bat-shit crazy vibe at the time. Must have picked it up later.
The illustration leads me to believe he has a lucrative career ahead of him as a children’s cereal mascot.
So the clever “I could have been more corrupt, but I wasn’t” (aka “think of the children”) defense did not work. TruckNutz!
Seriously, he was getting almost as boring as Carline Kennedy. ‘Bout time.
Blago is going to go Milhouse on all yer asses.
this is what happens when you shop for toupees at ron’s discount merkins.
He was right, he is the anti-Nixon. At least that SOB knew enough to resign before the Senate vote.
Forgotten in 3… 2… what?
Call me crazy, but I loved him quoting Tennyson as the wagons circled. Poetry is the last refuge to which a scoundrel clings?
Boring. I’m bored now. Who’s next?
Even better. by unanimous vote. he got permabanned from holding office in IL.
well played Blago, well played.
THE PROCESS WAS WRONG FROM THE BEGINNING. SINCE 1818 THE PROCESS HAS BEEN WRONG.
We’ll meet again
We’ll meet again,
Don’t know where,
Don’t know when
But I know we’ll meet again some sunny day
Keep denying though,
Just like you always do
Till your alien hair takes you far away
but who’s hair do we make fun of now?
tunamelt: “Try new Blag-O’s! Loaded with healthy fiber (human hair), with a sweet sweet taste of chutzpah with just a touch of hubris! They’re f______ golden!!!”
There’s an unemployed merkin lurkin’.
Now’s the part where he chains himself to his desk naked, John and Yoko style.
He shall not be moved!
I miss him already. When’s he getting his own TV show?
Whose gonna guard his beloved “football” while he’s in the slammer? Football of course being Blago code for his favorite hairbrush. What you thought getting your hair to look that amazing was easy? http://democralypsenow.blogspot.com/2009/01/blago-freak-show-express-to-derail-in.html
I Hate to be as presumptuous as to correct Layne but: “You were really the most shameless, annoying political dingus of this young century”. Have you forgotten about our beloved ex-president GWB no. 43?
Blago: “And I would have gotten away with it if it weren’t for you meddling kids! You haven’t heard the last of meeee!!!”
InsidiousTuna: On Saturday Morning on Cartoon Network, AND A CEREAL!
LittlePig: He legit looks like one of those Rice Krispies elves.
wickedlittledoll: Football = Linus’ Blanket?
nmmagayar: Kay Baily Hutchison’s
Pleez to have a Blago/Palin crazy-off now? On the tee vee?
A day worse than Pearl Harbor. Worse than the day Ghandi or King were killed. A day worse than Nixon’s watergate. A day worse than finally showing up to your own hearing and getting kicked out by the ass. They already changed the locks!!!!! A great day in the history of bad hair.
I noticed that the justice who swore in the new governor read the oath from an index card and got it right the first time.
Gee, I almost think I’m gonna miss him. Of course, knowing how these things go, he’ll go to the slammer, get buggered up the ass, find Jesus, write a best-seller about all of it and become either a televangelist or talk show host or some weird combination of both. Nah…I don’t miss him. He’ll be back soon enough.
StephanieInCA: dirty secks videoz!!!!!111!1!
Goodbye Blago’s Hair
Though I never knew you at all
You had the grace to hold yourself
While those around you went limp
They didn’t use enough mousse
And they combed it all wrong
They spat at your style
because you were such a fucking valuable thing.
And it seems to me you lived your life
Like a toupee in the wind
Never knowing what to cling to
When the rain set in
And I would have liked to have known you
But I didn’t have a bribe.
Your hold gave out long before
Your legend ever did
kingofnothing: Provincials.
He should really quick call Hillary for advise on how to “stay in it to win it”, or “not quit until all of the voters get a say”, or some such lame crap! Don’t give up Blagy! Someone, somewhere, still believes in you.
But Ken, what are we going to do for laffs–Bush crawled back under a rock, teh PUMAs are demoralized, and now this? Is Wonkette going to become nothing but (rather than, say 75%) a circle jerk?!
That is not going to look good on his resume.
The barbers were behind this.
ella:
http://picasaweb.google.com/sanducerico/UntitledAlbum05?authkey=P9I7s3lOxKk#5296450461470692914
GlennBecksFelch: You said Rod. You said Shaft. Also.
THIS IS WORSE THAN 9/11!!1!!!!11!!!!!!!!!!!!@!
This is merely the beginning of his career as a talk show host. Rhode Island politicians can show him how this is done. Buddy C is a role model….
They had to pass two motions of impeachment - one for Blago and one for the alien mass that lives on his head.
Red Zeppelin: That and Buttsex.
Also, Pandas, also.
Is he going to file for unemployment too?
Next stop: Dancing With The Stars!
Blago could be a Mark Twain character, a huckster through and through. As J. Alter said, all he needs is one stray juror.
That’s the nicest thing anyone’s ever said about me on Wonkette, also.
-SP
Good christ! Chris Matthews is now affectionately referring to him as B-rod. These twits have been filming the brick wall at this jackass’s house for 20 minutes.
Atheist Nun: Dancing Behind Bars?
Anyone want to guess who’s going to write his version of Silent Coup? Doesn’t Kitty Kelley need work? THE TRUTH WILL OUT!
Does this increase or decrease the chances of Blago v. Palin in 2012 and/or 2016?
Blago we hardly knew ye.
I fell dirty, but watching his presser - I’d hit it
Now he’ll only be able to afford amateur-pecia.
and I never saw a Blaggy Blingee
Did you just see him yammer in Spanish, end it with “Si se puede” and then try to drag some random kids into the shot?
How many small children will he have to molest in order to get the sympathetic documentary from HBO?
Oh, the persecution! the tragedy!
He should write one of those “If I did it” books like OJ. Oh yeah, he did do it, and he got caught
btwbfdimho: It won’t let me see whatever’s there.
GOOD riddance to political THUG BLAGO. Maybe, he can come and run for office in Kentucky! OsiSpeaks.com
of fuck, Dr.King again…
“We have this thing called impeachment, and it’s bleepin’ golden”
Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!
shortsshortsshorts: Seeing Starbursts Behind Bars!
nmmagayar: uh, yeah, you should feel dirty about that.
Ok. Talking bets here. How long until Blago catches a flight out to Serbia to “visit long lost relatives”?
Wait a minute! Isn’t this against the Fugitive Slave Act? oh well ….
Has anyone else noticed that Blago looks/sounds quite a bit like “Diamond” Joe Quimby of “The Simpsons” fame?
Fix was in.
Rad. Now if we could just do something about that Ashton Kutcher.
How long before the esteemed Mrs. Blago goes on the talk show circuit? I say about 10 nanoseconds.
Vanity Smurf: I can’t help it - I like trashy guys
“Just like Jesus I am about to be crucified to save you all from your own sins. Forgive these legislators, Heavenly Father, for they know not what they do. They seek to cast your only born son, the most innocent of all innocents, into a dungeon where I will be unable to help all the poor and downtrodden children. And yea though I stand here and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and…”
How much cocaine does it take to do that? No, seriously, how much?
Game Over For Illinois’ Favorite Lego-Haired Crime Boss!
http://democralypsenow.blogspot.com/2009/01/game-over-for-illinois-favorite-crime_29.html
It would have been far more amusing if Blago had refused to be removed from office and had to be dragged out kicking & screaming by the Illinois State Police, which haven’t been the subject of random hilarity since the Blues Brothers Movie.
Orange whip? Orange whip? Three orange whips.
SayItWithWookies: one can only hope.
OK. Another huge political failure has been consumed. Next!
All I know is, I’m never going to Temple, TX. Scary!
SOUND THE ALARMZ MUTHAFUCKAZ!
Larry King, Ted Haggard and Larry King’s decrepit shoulder blades are having a conversation on CNN right now. Subjects include anal sex, meth, Jesus, “Mr. Jones”(?) and anal sex.
nmmagayar: I’d hit it too. Bad taste. Also.
How about this hair clown?: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rick_Perry. He’s way overdo for being outed on cruisy shenanigans.
*crosses fingers*
Please let him be convicted of the federal charges so he can go to a federal ‘pound me in the ass’ prison… Don’t eat the cockmeat sandwich!
Butt sechs, also.
@Bots: That sounds fucking terrifying. I hope they have a web stream. I’ll get the lotion and towel.
Rodney Badger: No need to wait that long. Blago can move to Alaska and run for governor in 2010.
The Frogurt Is Also Cursed: I just did an experiment on an international video chatroom (WHICH I NEVER DO BUT I AM BORED AND THE INTERNET IS DEAD) with buttsecks, and I was banned. People are weenies. Blago would have been banned for life from that gay place.
The Frogurt Is Also Cursed: er anti-gay. Those bastards.
THIS IS A TRAVESTY! WHEN WILL OUR LONG NATIONAL NIGHTMARE BE OVER? PLEASE DON’T TAKE BLAGO AWAY FROM ME I LOVE HIM SO MUCH HE IS PRETTY.
hobospacejungle: His hair can forgive your sins, also.
DoctorCulturae:
—> stray juror, I live in Winnebago or should I Winneblago Co.
Pick me!
He’ll be on Dancin’ Wit Da Stars by summer, you guys, no worries. Can you picture him break dancing? I can.
Didn’t Fleetwood Mac write a song about this very event, like, thirty years ago?
Yes they did. And that song was called “Gypsy.”
Skull Alert! They don’t let you wear your rug in the joint.
Colander: Same thing happened to Gandhi, also.
Can we at least keep Blago’s wife, Patti? She has the hot slutty look that I like. And I know I’m not alone. Blago may have THE HAIR but Patti’s ‘do, the way it swishes about her face, makes the slut-lover in me go all crazee with the hawtness. So if Blago goes to prison she will stay home, alone, the martyred MILF, looking for someone to comfort her. I am that someone. Call me Patti, you will be safe in my arms.
Well, now, what was the point of all that I wonder?
Well, damn. I expected that at least one majority-black-district State Senator - preferably James Meeks - would vote to not impeach Blago, based on some complicated reasoning that I (and most likely anyone else) wouldn’t understand.
Alas, no. But Meeks’ rant was a nice consolation prize, especially the part about ‘upstate and downstate militias’ and his shouting of ‘ABSOLUTELY!’ during the vote to bar Blago from ever running for office again.
Good riddance.
Just conducted a foolish thought experiment, replaced Bush II as president for recently axed Gov. Headpubes, gave him 9-11 and a similarly addled sub-fuehrer VP, and… OWW! The experiment went instantly awry. Beaker exploded, sustained 3rd-degree burns over 85% of my psyche. That’ll teach me to probe the far reaches of mindfuckery on an idle whim.
[quote]You were really the most shameless, annoying political dingus of this young century, and you were never even funny/terrifying like, say, Sarah Palin.[/quote]
Are you kidding?
I’ve seen a lot of crazy in politicians over the years, but there has never been crazy as hilarious as Blago. NEVER
No sister-in-law in THIS chamber to give him a lone vote.
O how the feeble have fallen~
Hey Wonketteers - in this gambling-crazed SUPER BOWL®© Weekend, is anyone going to place a bet on the number of *hours* to pass between Blago’s manic-street-preacher episode and his debut on Faux News as their brand-new First-chair Celebrity Obama-hater™? If he’s going to continue disgracing himself in public, he might as well get paid for it, no?
Bearbloke: http://www.pumapac.org
http://www.confluence.umm.RIVERDAUGHTER.gov
http://www.mywifeleftmeandthatmakesmebitterandallthatsonowIamaHillarysupporter.com HAS GIVEN ME SO MANY ANSWERS. *fart*
Blago is really a Repug. /whisper campaign
His taint has been kicked out of Illinois, causing us to celebrate with hosannahs and hallelujahs and roses and soft violins. We shall never see his like again, or we hope we don’t. His crazy grew up through his hair.
shanemacgowan: I’m not sure self-delusion and insatiable greed are the same as crazy.
“I got the horse right here, his name is Paul Revere, and you can bet your money when the weather’s clear - can do. Can do. They say that the horse can do.” (As sung by Stubby Kaye - Blago’s Godfather). Nathan Detroit was from Michigan of course. These days in Illinois it is fashionable to be a bit of a meshugana. That goes for the whole state legislature too. Tap all their phones.
I love Guys and Dolls! I can see him now: Testify! Blago as Nicely Nicely: I dreamed last night I was on the boat to Leaven-Worth, and by some chance I had brought my SENATOR IN MY POCKET along….and there I stood, and I hollered….this is a valuable focking thing! Then suddenly up by butty went a dong! “went a dong…” Then THEY SAID SIT DOWN..”sit down”..SIT DOWN AND TAKE IT YOU BEATCH!… Frank Loesser wrote the book on that one didn’t he? Where is Skye Masterson when you need him?
People, People!
His obvious next career move is to be Fox News’ chief political analyst!