National Review Columnist ENRAGED By Obamas’ New Chef

  sure why not

The Corner’s eagle-eyed investigative blog reporter Lisa Schiffren — of the famous “Obama’s Political Origins” column this time last year in which she wrote, “But, for a white woman to marry a black man in 1958, or 60, there was almost inevitably a connection to explicit Communist politics,” so as to prove that Barack Obama Junior hated America — has written a delightful screed detailing the Hypocrisy of that demonic hellshrew, Michelle Hussein Obama, devastatingly titled “Arugula with That?” Ha, get it, it’s like when Barack Obama said “arugula” one time, ever, in Iowa, summer 2007. Schiffren argues that since the Obamas would sometimes call this private chef’s food service in Chicago for the night, they are now… awful?

The private chef in question is Sam Kass, whom the Obamas hired recently to join the White House staff as a chef. Schiffren seems to assume that Kass was the Obamas’ exclusive private chef who lived in a hobbit hole beneath their stove, and never left:

For the past many months the nation’s foodies—Alice Waters and others—have been salivating at the prospect of a President who might be willing to take time off from being commander-in-chief, saving the economy, and keeping up the permanent campaign to spread the current gospel about sustainable, “locavore” eating. Heartened by the Obama’s taste in trendy, sophisticated Chicago restaurants, they have envisioned a garden on the heavily wired White House lawn. Maybe a farmer’s market in Lafayette Park? They have proffered ideas for chefs who might make this happen. But today, news comes that the Obamas will not run a national Top Chef competition—because they are bringing their own, private chef from Chicago to the White House. Well, isn’t that nice?

[...]

Who knew? I believed all that stuff about how Michelle was an overburdened modern working mother, rushing from school dropoff to her high-paying, demanding work at the hospital, to dress fittings, to whatever it was she needed to do to support her husband’s political aspirations, back home to take care of her daughters. Call me naive, but that model usually includes making dinner. And squeezing in a weekly grocery shopping trip. Especially for those fresh, whole foods that don’t keep so long. Now I have to wonder who did the laundry, and the vaccuuming. Sure, granny helped—but I doubt she was the maid. Who was?

Oh my god. There’s an unusual amount of “inference” here for a supposedly serious article about nothing. Here’s what the Times wrote about Kass in its piece:

A Chicago native, Mr. Kass graduated from the University of Chicago and received his formal training at a Michelin-starred restaurant in Europe. He then went to work at Avec, a Chicago wine bar serving Mediterranean food.

After he left the restaurant, Mr. Kass, 28, founded Inevitable Table, a private chef service in Chicago that, according to its Web site, is the client’s “link to clean, healthy food.”

See, “private chef service,” so if you are famous like Barack and Michelle Obama, and you are maybe going out one night to a soiree of sorts, you might call the private chef from the PRIVATE CHEF COMPANY to come and cook a healthy meal for your children. Or you might hire him for a dinner party, of which they probably had many!

…OR MAYBE MICHELLE IS A WHORE?

Didn’t the women at Slate, among others, complain that there was something offensive about Sarah Palin’s apparent ability to raise 5 children, run the state of Alaska, run marathons, and cook those mooseburgers—because it set the bar too high for ordinary women? But they were willing to believe that Michelle could do it all, and keep it all organic and healthy at that—because she has a law degree from Harvard?

???

Blah blah Slate hussies, blah blah, blah blah blah Sarah Palin is good blah blah blah, blah, blah, blah blah blah blah sexism? Blah blah Michelle blah blah liberal blah arugula blah blah “healthy” blah blah blah elitism education?

Arugula with That? [The Corner]

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Jim Newell is Wonkette's beloved Capitol Hill Typing Demon. He joined Wonkette.com in 2007, left for some other dumb job in 2010, and proudly returned in 2012 as our "Senior Editor at Large." He lives in Washington and also writes for things such as The Guardian, the Manchester paper of liberals.

View all articles by Jim Newell

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115 comments

  1. Hooray For Anything

    Wait? Michelle didn’t make dinner while at the same time working? I say impeach her.

  2. StephanieInCA

    Can somebody please come up with a list of approved, non-elitist vegetables? Is anything mentioned in the Old Testament pretty much fair game?

  3. The Station Manager

    …What? So they want Michelle to stay in the kitchen. They fantasize about her being pregnant. Should we take away her shoes to make the transition to 1950 complete?

  4. Canmon (the Inadequate)

    I remember when the National Review under William F. Buckley used to revel in their elitism. Now they all want to show how they are just regular folks who don’t eat no fancy grub or sleep indoors. What is the point of being a conservative if not to look down on those you consider inferior?

  5. Too Lazy To Sign In

    And what would be so bad about having a farmer’s market on H and 16th with White House grown vegetables?

    Oh, and that is CHEF Kass to you.

  6. Naked Bunny with a Whip

    As soon as all Republicans who claim to represent “the common folk” get rid of their nannies, butlers, chefs, secretaries, chauffeurs, pool cleaners, gardeners, and male prostitutes, Schiffren can write this article again and not be openly mocked.

  7. rambone

    As we all know, it doesn’t take much to fry up some chichin’ and some hog jowls.

    Thank you right wing nut jobs for insisting that the Obamas keep it real.

  8. NoWireHangers

    Michelle Obama is horrible failure because she (allegedly) doesn’t cook. What a miserable failure this Lisa is. Most Americans don’t “cook”. They eat various processed trash that is slowing killing them. Poors fire up a skillet of Hamburger Helper made with $1 frozen extruded cow parts or take their terrible obese children to McDonalds for dinner. The Middle Class frequent quality restaurants like Chili’s or TGI Fridays where crazy crap is glued to the wall and they can eat delicious things like Oreo Cookie Shakes and Bloomin’ Onions. If you’re a rich American, you can dine well at places like Red Lobster or Olive Garden (for “ethnic” foods). How DARE the Obamas dare to hire a chef that likes “clean, healthy food.” It’s what communists would do. They should be cooking roadkill over black cauldron on the White House lawn.

  9. MarSF

    If you ever saw a photograph of Ms. Schiffren you would understand that she is obsessed by anything related to food or eating.

  10. tunamelt

    “One man’s faith allows him to eat everything, but another man, whose faith is weak, eats only vegetables.”
    — Romans 14:2 (NIV translation)

  11. chascates

    Actually it seems pretty evident that Sarah Palin WASN’T able to raise 5 kids (properly), run the state of Alaska (successfully), or run marathons (?-hadn’t heard that one). A moooseburger is made the same way as a hamburger so she couldn’t fuck that up although it seems she made tons of chili they could just reheat.
    The only bar Palin set has been met, and possibly exceeded, by the Illinois governor.

  12. NoWireHangers

    Clearly the Obamas should wait for manna to fall from the sky. It’s what God would want them to be eating.

  13. wallythepug

    The only difference between this and pizza delivery is that its more expensive and probably won’t contribute to a heart attack. Face it bitch, the Obamas made a nice salary between them and can afford such niceties. I would too if I were in their position. My grocery store has chef prepared meals for chrissakes.

  14. ManchuCandidate

    1) 1 15 oz Can of Bile
    2) 3 tblsps of Duh
    3) 2 lbs of Moose Nutz
    4) 1 reminder that you were once Dan Quayle’s Speechwriter

    Pour ingredients into mixing bowl, stir and let sit then fire off into ‘tubes

    Once done,
    5) Pour 1/2 oz of vermouth into martini glass
    6) Pour 3 Oz of Gin
    7) One olive.
    8) Throw back in one gulp. Repeat till memory goes away.

  15. Iggy Plop

    i’m surprised the wingnuts haven’t picked up on the news about the 1000 bottle wine cellar the Obamas are leaving behind.

  16. IceCreamEmpress

    Oh, boo hoo, upper-middle-class two-career couple sometimes uses chef service. Cry me a fucking river.

  17. Texan Bulldoggette

    [re=232048]MarSF[/re]: KLo must be as well. (Her picture should not be viewed while eating…or breathing.)

    Why can’t NRO find any hot chicks to write their shitty columns. At least Fox gets the pretty bobble-headed blonds.

  18. Dreamer

    I find this troubling – can I recall my vote cuz I believed Michelle was a real woman who cooked every day. Private Chef! What a fraud that Obama. How dare they hire that chef and since he cooks Mediterranean food he is probably a terrorist.

  19. Kev-O-Tron

    This is petty to the point of absurdity. The more they whine the better it gets for the Democrats.

  20. NoWireHangers

    The other thing that makes this article so mind-blowingly stupid is that the White House has a chef and staff. What first lady has ever cooked? Nancy Reagan? Bitch hasn’t eaten since 1950.

  21. bhosp

    Translation: Hiring employees to perform services of any kind, even (especially) if you have obvious need of such services and sufficient income to pay such employees, is Uppity.

  22. illnoise

    locavore? sounds like you just eat crazy hispanic women. Why can’t it be “localvore” or the latin “locuvore?”

  23. springfield_meltdown

    [re=232038]Canmon (the Inadequate)[/re]: Well, there is still some sort of elitism going on here since apparently Schiffren only knows stay at home moms who can do all the cooking and cleaning for their families. I’ve met very few middle class working moms who don’t have a cleaning service. And who doesn’t do take out of some sort?

  24. Serolf Divad

    If anyone’s wondered why “The Corner” does not allow readers to post comments on their blog postings, well here you have it: (a) imbecilic articles like this one are just too damn easy to ridicule (b) most of the approving comments would be posted by guys who also hang out on Stormfront bitching about why the impending race war hasn’t broken out yet.

  25. Naked Bunny with a Whip

    After eight years of George W. “Son of an Oil Baron” Bush, are the Republicans really going to go with the “Obama is rich enough to order out for fancy food sometimes” message?

  26. King of Pants

    [re=232080]Naked Bunny with a Whip[/re]: Of course they are! Because they’re FUCKING IDIOTS.

  27. Heywood Floyd

    My vision actually blurred a few times while reading all that.

    Any coincidence that she chose the Michelin RED Guide over Zagat’s?

    Get it? RED!

    COMMUNIST!

  28. Neon Trotsky

    Maybe a farmer’s market in Lafayette Park?

    Yeah, what sort of elitists support “farmers” and their “markets” anyway? Surely conservatives should have no interest in either of those things. And as if D.C. would every get any of these farmers markets anyway–how laughably absurd!

  29. TexasCowGirl

    Maybe it’s me, but this sounds a lot like “How dare this ni**ers” live better then I do?”

  30. Atheist Nun

    Way to go, Schiffren, that’s a fine example of some C-minus navel-gazing right there. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ll be spending the next few minutes fantasizing about you shutting the fuck up.

  31. rev_matt_y

    That last paragraph, the one that starts “Blah blah” is easily the most cogent piece of writing Schiffren has ever done.

  32. Tommmcatt

    I’m still stuck at the “White Woman+Black Man = Communist” thing at the beginning. The stupid there transfixes me and I just read it over and over, perseverating, wondering how this woman is able to tie her shoes.

  33. drrty martini

    This, too, is a Scandale K-Lo can share with her children. Meanwhile, Shiffs will investigate why teh blacks always have such round bottoms.

  34. Neon Trotsky

    Also, these articles are removed from reality by so many degrees it would take hours to sort it all out, as Schiffren takes wingnut interpretations of liberals’ views on Michelle Obama and Sarah Palin and then attempts to determine what their reaction should be to this non-twist of an inferred event.

  35. Mustang

    Damn those WOMEN at Slate for misleading me! Damn! Now I voted for the wrong person. HAD I KNOWN…IF ONLY… But it’s too late. I just have to live with the horrible reality that Michelle Obama did not cook dinner and now she is president and Sarah Palin cooked Moose Helper EVERY SINGLE DAY and I did not vote for her for president because I am STUPID STUPID STUPID!

  36. WIDTAP

    You are all missing the fundamental point. Real Americans(TM) do not hire other Americans to cook for them. It is demeaning. Real Americans(TM) always hire illegals to cook for them.

  37. ToArchStantonsLeft

    “clean, healthy food” Seems our chef Kass is trying to side step the first rule of Fight Club

  38. space stout

    [re=232058]Iggy Plop[/re]: what is the exact location of this wine cellar and which security system do they use to guard it?

  39. Hooray For Anything

    Good thing the Republicans aren’t in control of congress because if this was like ’93 or ’94 we’d have at least three independant prosecutors looking into just who cooked the Obama’s dinner.

  40. mercure

    Screw all you haters.

    I, for one, am happy to stand and loudly applaud the National Review’s continuing exploration of such vitally relevant journalistic topics. It will no doubt serve them and their movement well in the coming years.

  41. heroinmule

    And the awesome thing is that Obama never acknowledges this Mommy wars bullshit the Boomers love so much. He just ignores them like the children they are because the adults have to clean up the trail of turds the Boomers left in their wake. This bitch is obsolete.

  42. qwerty42

    It has come to this? After all these years, the “Conservative Movement” is … this? They are tired and don’t know what to do anymore. They proclaim a talk radio show host as their leader, can come up with no useful ideas for the current situation (but happily recycle 30-year old “wisdom”). And now a private chef who wasn’t a private chef. Buckley was a smart guy, no matter what you thought of his politics. Now the NR is staffed with a bunch of stiffs who see their world ending and don’t know what they do. They thought it would last forever. Surely we can all join hands and laugh at them.

  43. actor212

    Call me naive, but that model usually includes making dinner.

    OK, you’re naive. Especially if you think ANY First Lady cooks, ever. You know, except to entertain their gentlemen (or lady) callers and don’t want prying staff eyes…

  44. Dientes

    Is it too much to hope that she falls overboard on that National Review Cruise they are advertising on their site? Maybe she can take good old Karl with her. I’d pay $3000 just to get the opportunity to grease up the deck with some grass fed pig’s ass fat right before they walk out to watch the Grecian sunset together.

  45. Lascauxcaveman

    [re=232063]Kev-O-Tron[/re]: Seriously. Here’s what I’m reading:

    NRO (TO WORLD): “I, ummmmm ….? I got nothin’.” [shrugs shoulders]

  46. Jukesgrrl

    Who’s cleaning Laura Bush’s new house in Dallas? Because I’m sure she’s real busy being a librarian again now that she doesn’t have to sweep up her own cigarette butts in the White House.

  47. GDTRFB

    For the last 8 years I was challenged daily by the urge to stab idiots like this, my hippie NorCal hippie upbrining notwithstanding. I thought Jan. 20th would end such urges. But no, I really, really feel like plunging a moose antler through this woman’s chest. Then I’ll twirl on her guts. only 3 days until my next therapy session…

  48. ManchuCandidate

    I suspect that Lisa loves Cindy Lou McCain, the “author” of “Cindy Lou McCain’s original family recipe NABISCO Chips Ahoy Chocolate Chip Cookies from the Bag.”

    What makes these Chips Ahoy Chocolate Chip Cookies so special is the Chocolate Chips are replaced with OxyContin.

  49. SayItWithWookies

    I’m sure Lisa Schiffren was equally outraged when Laura Bush said about leaving the White House that she looked forward to cooking again. Oh, wait — apparently she didn’t.

  50. Kev-O-Tron

    [re=232142]Lascauxcaveman[/re]: I really wish I wasn’t banned at Malkin’s spot because the rhetoric in her comment threads is abysmally retarded. In the space of 24 hours she posted a screed about SCHIP and how terrible it would be to provide healthcare to children. Next up came a post about how terrible it would be to provide birth control to low-income families.

    Today’s leading post is about the horrors of Obama eating Wagyu beef. She claims she had to look up “wagyu”. So do Republicans only eat at McDonalds these days? Funny because the Metropolitan Grill sure does fill up with some stodgy old white dudes. Are they all Democrats now?

    The conservative platform has been reduced to “MAKE BABIES AND PAY FOR THEM YOURSELF EVEN THOUGH YOU DON’T HAVE A JOB!!!!1! ALSO!”

  51. shortsshortsshorts

    [re=232176]Kev-O-Tron[/re]: That’s been their winning strategy for a few years I supposes. But it WINS ELECTIONS!1111! RIGHT???? also.

  52. canadasteve

    The Obamas have some nerve. Don’t they know that patriotic Americans hire illegal Mexicans to do everything? If you don’t you’re obviously are a communist who hates America!

  53. Vanity Smurf

    [re=232103]Tommmcatt[/re]: Yeah, everybody knows that in that equation the white woman has to be Jewish too. She can’t even do wingnut math correctly.

  54. octupletsmom

    The NRO is shocked, shocked, that now that we have a black First Couple that the ‘Merican peoples can’t at least fire the entire housekeeping staff at the WH.

  55. JSDC007

    Damn that America hating, communist loving Michele Obama for refusing to cook a state dinner for 100. After all, isn’t that what all black women should be able to do? Cook up a mess-a-somethin’, some catfish, cornpone, them collards, and lets not forget that fried chicken for 100.

    NRO must really have the dumbest broad broads on their staff. Guess Kathleen Parker saw the writing on the wall and decided to de-wingnut herself and leave.

  56. knoxtheharpy

    Right, because sainted Laura Bush cooked a lot of dinners for the twins in between being a school librarian and downing the necessary pills to keep her blissfully addled enough to deal with her husband and in-laws.

  57. Lionel Hutz Esq.

    You have to understand that writers from the Corner don’t understand that Michelle might not have time to cook as they only feed on waste material by shoving their proboscis up the rectum of warm blooded creatures, which takes no time at all.

  58. Doctorb

    Not only does elitist Arugula Hussein X have his own personal chef he can call at three AM to make him a sandwich, BUT! His house has FANCY COLUMNS OUT FRONT, like he’s some sort of GREEK AND/OR ROMAN DEITY, because he thinks that highly of himself. Also.

  59. Doctorb

    Also, for a white woman to marry a black man in 1958 would still be illegal in, like, 23 states. Which is sort of what comes to mind with that first quote — way to shoot yourself in the foot.

  60. tiger

    What a cunt this Lisa loser is. Talk about women-hating, man-baiting bitch. She skipped some classes at her community college on feminism, and where NOT to work if you want anyone to take you seriously. Bag of pubic hair she is…

  61. NunnaTheSOBs

    Michelle Obama is just upholding
    the tradition of Betty Friedan,
    the old battle ax who used to
    host her fellow feminists in her
    home, where she and the rest of
    those “mothers” of feminism were
    waited on by a black maid wearing
    a starched white uniform.

    Mrs. O is just determined to be
    the SERVED rather than the SERVER
    in THIS iteration of the bullshit.

    If someone really believed that
    1/2 of the team who held themselves
    in sufficiently high regard that
    they aspired to rule over our
    crumbling empire, was a truly
    HUMBLE person, then she is revealing
    more about herself than Mrs. O.

    Anybody over 5 years old who expects
    consistency in human beings probably
    shouldn’t be trusted to cross
    the street alone.

  62. One Yield Regular

    It’s great to see National Review finally engaging the crucial issues of our time and demonstrating that conservatism can still provide an important voice for illuminating the course of human progress.

    Keep up the terrific work, NRO!

  63. picyou

    Ann Coulter is at least entertaining, in a shrill and crazy kind of way, sort of like the UFC. But Lisa Schiffren can’t even think up a good hook. It’s just dense, boring, small-minded shit.

  64. grevillea

    Everyone knows having a private chef is one of the most important tenets of Misogynist-Kenyan Communism. Dead giveaway.

  65. problemwithcaring

    I was watching this documentary on National Geographic Channel called “Inside Air Force One” and it showed Barack meeting the captain and crew on his first day last Tuesday. The plane’s butler (of course, a black dude) gives him a menu and Barack orders a turkey sandwich with Dijon mustard, lettuce and tomato.

    What killed it was when the butler asked “So…Grey Poupon?” like he didn’t even want to use the words. And Barry kinda nodded at first, like HE didn’t want to answer, then said quickly “That’s fine, that’s fine.”

    LOL! I loved it. Barry don’t be embarrassed! Mustard is working class – it’s Miracle Whip that’s elitist.

    Video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Z38KpsBI7A (minute 1:41)

  66. AnnieGetYourFun

    Also, dear Slate and NRO and everyone else: I am SO FUCKING BORED of stories about women who can do it all hating on those who can’t and vice versa. Honestly, is there anything more tedious than talking about women’s lives, especially relatively well-off women in rich Western countries? Call me when the Pink Sari Gang goes on a daal-cooking strike or something. God, you fucking self-absorbed wenches. No wonder I stopped being a lesbian. You goddamn bitches and your constant whining about women who have lots of children and women who don’t have any children. Mind your own vagina and whatever comes sliding out of it.

    (This is not to say that I don’t support longer leave for new parents and childcare benefits of some kind, but FUCK)

  67. Gayer Than Thou

    Great. Now you’re going to tell me that Michelle doesn’t make the family’s clothes either, or wash them down at the creek. She probably buys store-bought butter, rather than churn her own, too.

  68. grevillea

    [re=232405]Gayer Than Thou[/re]: To free up her time for dancing in front of the wireless and reading suffragette pamphlets, I’ll be bound.

  69. hobospacejungle

    Lisa Schiffren is soon to be the next Candy Crowley. And I don’t mean “woman TV journalist,” if you know what I mean. And I think you do.

    Oh wait, are we not supposed to make fun of fat people? Are we back to the whole “glandular problem?” Too bad. The Corner sucks because they don’t allow reader comments. They are cowards. And future huge fat people.

  70. Lascauxcaveman

    [re=232403]AnnieGetYourFun[/re]: Dang. We men were hoping you stopped being a lesbian because you were overwhelmed by our macho, musky, manliness. And I’ve been wasting all this money on ‘Axe’ products.

  71. Vercingatorix

    I’ll bang her into submissiveness, but she’ll have to wait her turn hanging in rack chains behind, Colter, Palin, and the Faux bitches. Perhaps it’s best to leave them hanging to think about how bad they are.

  72. Robinet

    I remember when the National Review under William F. Buckley used to revel in their elitism

    Bill, by the way, and his frequently tired and emotional wife Pat had a private chef for 35 years. Vanity Fair said it so it must be true.

  73. PsycGirl

    [re=232405]Gayer Than Thou[/re]: She washes them at the creek but with elite store-bought soap, not the stuff real patriots make from lye, ashes and hog fat.

  74. Mr Blifil

    Also Obama’s tendency to wipe the corners of his mouth with official White House napkins is a disgrace to the Office of the Presidency. Who’s supposed to clean all that linen, Mr. Fancypants? The erstwhile slaves working out of the garage with their shine boxes and their 3 card monte games? I think Michelle must be a hoor, if she can’t figure out a way to give her brats 3 squares without she has to bring in some faggot to take a blow torch to the vanilla pudding in order they eat it. Goddamn it if they were white none of this nightmare would be happening.

  75. schvitzatura

    Caucasian mouths agape, like the scene from Forrest Gump, where Benjamin Buford Blue’s (“Bubba”) Mamma gets pre-iPod Apple mega-profits from reinvested shrimp boat company proceeds and never has to cook another meal for “whitey” again, and is catered to by lower-class white trash uniformed domestic, in turn…

    Schiffren probably sends her Guatemalan au pair to Let’s Dish weekly, to assemble her meals for the week…so WTF?

  76. J-Man

    Be thankful the Obamas didn’t hire K-Lo’s private chef. In a few months, they’d be able to film “Nutty Professor 3: The Klumps Go To Washington.”

  77. Idlerat

    I have been unaccountably moved to write this retard a letter. I should really try not to be so bored at work given that I am lucky enough to have a job.

    The email (subject line: “chef” column makes no sense)

    Since your column is about people like me and what we think (feminist democratic women with jobs), I thought I’d help clarify that topic for you, because you are clearly addled and not making sense.

    Things like cooking are a lot of work and very time consuming.

    I thought Sarah Palin should probably choose between making moose chili for 5 kids and being (potentially) president, rather than try to do both.

    And I think it’s fine that Michelle Obama pays someone to cook for her family (at least some of the time).

    Both Sarah and Michelle have demanding jobs & kids. They both need and deserve help around the house. In fact, I would be pretty horrified if someone tried to do all their own housework while being President (which was Sarah P’s potential job). I need the president to do his or her job. I’ll even help pay someone to cook and clean for them – and what do you know, I do, right there in the Federal budget.

    I know you care a lot about making sense and representing the views of people who disagree with you, since the whole column is about people like me who are, you lament, hypocrites.

    But since my opinion about Michelle & cooking is IDENTICAL to my opinion about Sarah & cooking, I think you have had an accidental failure to make sense that makes your concern about hypocrisy impossible to understand.

    [my real and true name]

  78. MarSF

    [re=232773]Idlerat[/re]: Maybe you will get lucky and she will use your letter as an example of the responses she is getting.

    Sadly, The Corner usually only posts excepts of dissenting opinions if they are fruity and stupid enough for the fatties over there to ridicule.

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