black power

America Gets Its First Black Attorney General!

Slow train coming.Hooray for progress! The Senate Judiciary Committee just approved Eric Holder for the Attorney General spot, by 17-2, which means the full Senate will now happily okay his nomination and America will have its first-ever African-American head of the Justice Department. There is a certain justice to this development, MMMHMMM? Anyway let’s hope Holder is a little bit better than the first Mexican attorney general, jesus fucking christ. [Reuters]

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A writer and editor of this website from 2006 to early 2012, Ken Layne is occassionally seen on Twitter and writes small books and is already haunting you from beyond (your) grave.

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  1. Advocatus_Diaboli

    Anyway let’s hope Holder is a little bit better than the first Mexican attorney general

    My dog would be a substantially better AG than Alberto.

  2. DoctorCulturae

    AG Holder: “So let’s see, about the ratio of incarcerated people of color… Hmmmm. Oh how can we achieve ‘equality’…. Dubya? Hummm?!”

  3. magic titty

    Who are the two mean ol’ crackers who voted against him?

    And will he have a playable character in the Super Obama World video game??

  4. shortsshortsshorts

    Alberto Gonzales had his feelings hurt well enough when he was breaking every known law of man. LEAVE HIM ALONE!11!

  5. masterdebater

    I guess we find out if the culture of Washinton has really changed now? If even one of the Bush crooks is prosecuted it would be a change from the old “let’s move on” excuses democrats have always used in the past…but I’ve got my money on the wimp factor winning out here.

  6. BillyClubb

    Now who’s gonna play Eric Holder on ‘Saturday Night Live’? And can we make fun of him without being called racist crackers?

  7. sarcasticusername

    @magic titty: coburn and john “i’m voting against everyone” cornyn.
    normally i hate the pornstache, but he’s working it so i vote to let him keep it; plus his stache twin axelrod might get a little worried if all the facial hair keeps getting scrubbed out of obama world.

  8. TGY

    Black or white, I’m just happy it’s someone who believes no one is above the law. Now, how many illegals clean house for him?

  9. Doglessliberal

    I like to think that Alberto was not really an AG. He was a humanoid robot who was controlled from a bunker deep under the Naval Observatory.

  10. Not_So_Much

    This is a good thing. I wonder if I can demonstrate enough loyalty to get a job? Mine just went bye-bye.

  11. PsycGirl

    [re=230666]SayItWithWookies[/re]: I say Darrell Hammond, because if you squint, Holder looks sorta like a black Bill Clinton.

  12. NoWireHangers

    [re=230644]Darehead[/re]: Oooh, I love the ‘stache. It’s sexy. ‘Staches are back, man!

  13. Advocatus_Diaboli


    what My dog left in the backyard this morning would be a substantially better AG than Alberto.


  14. Chickensmack

    [re=230663]TGY[/re]: Years and years of tired old generational stories emanate from the millions who filed through Ellis Island, in their hopes and dreams of becoming ‘Muricans… unless you’re a nanny?

  15. Doglessliberal

    [re=230686]Advocatus_Diaboli[/re]: right, because I think a dog would have better legal ethics than Alberto. Dog poop, not so much, but it is a close call.

  16. Chief Grinning Eagle

    It’s good to finally have a real lawyer in this position. A mouthpiece like Gonzales doesn’t even belong on a tuba. He might work on Sylvester Stallone as a mouthpiece for filming Rocky XXXV – the one where Rocky gets beaten to a pulp by Joan Rivers.

  17. Gayer Than Thou

    [re=230645]magic titty[/re]: Why do you assume that the two Senators who voted against had to be white? I mean, racist much? Given how diverse the U.S. population is, members of the Senate could be from any ethnic or racial … oh, wait.

    Never mind.

  18. Syd

    [re=230660]Colander[/re]: He is doing the Cabbage Patch. Made popular in the 1980’s, and works well with the stach. WootWoot!!

  19. tiny mexican

    Man, speaking of ol’ Gonzo, you guys totally missed the sexxy kiss he shared with Bush:

    GONZALES: The last thing he said as he was getting off the plane — he kissed me on the forehead — and he said, “Just stay strong.” […]

    HERMAN: Any tears shed on the plane by anybody?

    GONZALES: By me, yeah. There were a few.

    HERMAN: Why?

    GONZALES: Just pride. Just love and appreciation for the man and what he did, Ken.

  20. Toomush Infermashun

    I kind of like this Flavor-of-the-Month AG theory – Chinese next!….this time around we can work on changing the black/white prison ratio, and then, NEXT TIME we can bring back water torture…

  21. Jollity

    I may be hallucinating, but he looks a little bit like Rowan Atkinson to me.

    Anyway, someone should get him a present of a book of techniques to improve the memory – so he never finds himself saying “I don’t recall”.


    Who’s the black private dick That’s a sex machine to all the chicks?
    (Holder!) You’re damn right

    Who is the man That would risk his neck for his brother man?
    (Holder!)Can ya dig it?

    Who’s the cat that won’t cop out When there’s danger all about
    (Holder!) Right on

    You see this cat Shaft is a bad mother– (Shut your mouth)
    But I’m talkin’ about Holder (Then we can dig it)

    He’s a complicated man But no one understands him but his woman
    (Eric Holder)

  23. Mr Blifil

    Oh fuck they’re coming. Where the fuck am I supposed to hide my daughter? She’s taller than most of her contemporaries.

  24. bago

    Well, either way I’m pretty sure both a dog and a turd have a better memory than Alberto I don’t recall my own last name.

  25. Crankenstank

    Please, let’s use the Peggy-Noonan approved ethnic euphemisms in such posts: “Africkan” for Mr. Holder, and “Quetzlcoatlan-meso-american” for Gonzo.

  26. actor212

    Thus making it official: my alma mater now holds more power in America than ever before!


    Prepare for Tim Robbins’ movies on HBO, 24/7!


  27. psilage

    The real problem with Gonzalez was he was the first Tex-Mex atty general. I’m sure the first Mexican-American from anywhere else will do much better.

  28. DangerousLiberal

    [re=230638]Advocatus_Diaboli[/re]: Works every time. Which you can’t say about Regents U grads.

  29. Joe the Truck Nutz

    I’ve been a big Holder fan since his days of playing Detective Ron Harris on the Tee-Vee.

  30. randomsausage

    From the comments we can deduce that his Holder chap looks a lot like other black men with mousers.

Comments are closed.