• May 26, 2012
TERRIBLE OUTRAGES

January 27, 2009

Why Can’t You See This Vegetable Pornography Commercial During the Super Bowl?

by Ken Layne  


Here’s a political ad from a lobbying group which was REFUSED by the evil SUPER BOWL TV, so it’s of Great Interest to your Wonkette, which is all about politics, and hot models fucking broccoli, for freedom. [PETA]

{ 74 comments }

Colander January 27, 2009 at 10:35 pm

Oh, I wonder why they refused to show that. Kids love hot tubs! Also, vegetable-fellatio! Also!

Mr Blifil January 27, 2009 at 10:38 pm

Well you can ram a head of broccoli into some stripper for hour after sweaty hour or you can buy a juicer. I think the message of the ad is somewhat confused.

idrankthekoolaid January 27, 2009 at 10:40 pm

Veggiesecks commercial + SarahPAC = GOP landslide in 2012! Oh, wait, never mind- the ad has hot women, not schoolboys or male stripper internz. Also!

Mr Blifil January 27, 2009 at 10:41 pm

It also just hit me that there wasn’t a single pickle-licker. PETA get your heads out of your asses!

bhosp January 27, 2009 at 10:42 pm

Rule 34.

Giant Robot January 27, 2009 at 10:42 pm

Superbowl? I didn’t know PETA had that kind of petty cash laying around…

Pale Rider January 27, 2009 at 10:43 pm

Go VAG?

rambone January 27, 2009 at 10:44 pm

Finally I, and all my fellow vegisexuals can come out of the closet!

Larry Craig 4ever!

President Beeblebrox January 27, 2009 at 10:49 pm

HA HA HA

Yr. PETA dollars at work. If you just start shoving vegetables in yr. oiled-up private parts, yr. sex life will be better. QED!

Sea kittens, ftw!

villageatrois January 27, 2009 at 10:51 pm

Vegetables are easy.

Perot le fou January 27, 2009 at 10:51 pm

Something something Michael Schiavo something something.

Iggy Plop January 27, 2009 at 10:51 pm

well, my first impression is that the real reason it won’t air is because it’s retarded. but it’s an intended Super Bowl ad, so retardation would probably be a plus. then I think it’s payback from God for PETA trying to get people to call fish “sea kittens” to make them seem less appetizing. WE’VE ALREADY AGREED THAT “FISH” IS A PRETTY GOOD WORD FOR THEM, he says. TAKE THAT, he says. ALSO.

WadISay January 27, 2009 at 10:54 pm

Sweetie, once you’ve done meat, you’ll never go back.

shortsshortsshorts January 27, 2009 at 10:56 pm

The “remember to eat your broccoli” campaign didn’t work out for them? Jesus Christ my mother would beat me over that issue on frequent occasion, because she was drunk and stuffs. KIDS THESE DAYS. Those corrupted little bastards. They should stop planning anthrax attacks and start focusing on the REAL ISSUES, like eating your broccoli.

Neon Trotsky January 27, 2009 at 11:02 pm

Hooray for pointless ads, marketing their causes without relation to logic or causality! I can’t wait until next year’s Superbowl, for which the following ad is submitted:

STUDIES SHOW
FURRIES HAVE BETTER SEX

GO FURRY

bago January 27, 2009 at 11:03 pm

I’ll stick with my pork sword, also.

L Urchin January 27, 2009 at 11:03 pm

What does the Society Against Exploitation of Plant Kittens have to say about this outrage?

gliberal January 27, 2009 at 11:04 pm

This absolutely should have been refused, according to my peta. May I have some soup now please?

SayItWithWookies January 27, 2009 at 11:06 pm

They don’t want to show this ad? Fine — that’s their choice. But I better not see even one Cialis ad during the damn Super Bowl.

shortsshortsshorts January 27, 2009 at 11:06 pm

[re=230206]L Urchin[/re]: Carrots have feelings too. I agree with these sentiments. I hope that a semi-naked woman will come to the aid of carrots everywhere.

L Urchin January 27, 2009 at 11:08 pm

[re=230199]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: In my country, broccoli eat you!

Atheist Nun January 27, 2009 at 11:13 pm

STUDIES SHOW that this commercial has made me into a self-loathing vegetarian. Oh, no, wait… that actually happened the first time I heard someone in PETA open their stupid piehole.

villageatrois January 27, 2009 at 11:13 pm

[re=230214]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: “hope that a semi-naked woman will come to the aid of carrots everywhere.”

So as to return a favor. Right?

spacewolf January 27, 2009 at 11:19 pm

Drinking game:
A shot for each beer commercial that looks basically the same as that one.

Darehead January 27, 2009 at 11:23 pm

George H W Bush hates broccoli.
George H W Bush hates fat, ugly lesbians.
Therefore, fat, ugly lesbians love broccoli.
And hot football babes love pork rinds.

ushutyurmouthwhenurtalkintome January 27, 2009 at 11:25 pm

Funny. PETA wants to sponsor the great pig skin game? Maybe they should make a comercial of naked models in shoulderpads tossing around a HUGE acorn squash instead. Nice!

Dear Diorama January 27, 2009 at 11:25 pm

But, but, but! They’re all masturbating!

Studies show better SEX!

Is there something I don’t know about?

Jeeze, Peta.

Datsun510 January 27, 2009 at 11:25 pm

NONE of the vegetarians I know look like these women. The ones I know don’t shave, and could beat me up (not in the fun way).

btwbfdimho January 27, 2009 at 11:25 pm

Is it Peta or Puta.org?

bago January 27, 2009 at 11:40 pm

I bet nakedbunnywithawhip has a strong, err, opinion.

snowg00n January 27, 2009 at 11:54 pm

the real message should be “if you pretend to care about this shit, you will get laid. just not by these models.”

and how the hell can a woman get off with a pumpkin?

shortsshortsshorts January 28, 2009 at 12:02 am

[re=230220]villageatrois[/re]: She is a promoter of Carrot genocide. FIGHT IT. PUMA POWER.

CuntryFirst January 28, 2009 at 12:04 am

This gets me so excited for the Super Bowl, when I will be eating HAMBURGERS and HOTDOGS.

So, FAIL.

Ronnie Dobbs January 28, 2009 at 12:05 am

what? doesn’t everyone use veggies for sex?

Darehead January 28, 2009 at 12:08 am

[re=230258]snowg00n[/re]: Get off with a pumpkin? I was wondering that too. I guess it’s like lettuce. Maybe she gives it head?

Personally, I prefer the old standard cucumber. Broccoli makes most people fart, and cauliflower already looks like genital herpes (so they say).

Maybe we can find the answers in the Vegina Monologues.

villageatrois January 28, 2009 at 12:25 am

As Uncle Frank (Zappa) said: “Call any vegetable, and the chances are good! That a vegetable will respond to you.”

Dweezil Zappa had a vegetarian cooking show on Food TV.

Mr Blifil January 28, 2009 at 12:29 am

What has been the response of vaginatarians?

freppish January 28, 2009 at 12:34 am

wow that is the best PETA ad i have ever seen, i also want a steak, FAIL.

SayItWithWookies January 28, 2009 at 12:56 am

Y’all are just jealous of the vegetarians. “Studies show,” people! Science rules.

Darehead January 28, 2009 at 1:15 am

[re=230285]freppish[/re]: Got me feeling hot and corny. Excuse me, I think I’ll go veg out now while looking at pictures from the Onion. Anyone for giving peas a chance?

shortsshortsshorts January 28, 2009 at 1:24 am

This puts you all high and above most of the foster moms I visit. I want teh gays to marry each other first, also.

schvitzatura January 28, 2009 at 1:39 am

Was that bok choi (brassica rapa) bein immersed in a hot tub? Don’t these people know that will destroy the nutrient content, in no time flat?

@ ~ 0:05, does this also mean that samovar sippers and shisha/hookah pipes smokers are better lovers too?

I smell a COMINTERN/Russo-Persian/PETA conspiracy in the wings…

Lascauxcaveman January 28, 2009 at 2:36 am

Vegetables are clearly sexist. it’s disgusting how those vegetables objectify wymmen.

I eat only meat products from now on!

Darehead January 28, 2009 at 2:51 am

[re=230321]Lascauxcaveman[/re]: Well, they can certainly offer up a little crudité, especially when sliced up raw and thin and fresh, and spread out all over the platter for the inexperienced, who have not yet lost their veg-inity.

hobospacejungle January 28, 2009 at 3:47 am

This would’ve totally worked with different music, say, something from Mozart’s Salzburg Symphonies.

PETA will get more press coverage for being denied than if the ad ran. I think that was probably the plan.

I must be the only vegetarian Wonketteer.

loislane1939 January 28, 2009 at 3:50 am

You know, I am a little surprised some feminist group hasn’t gotten into a death match with PETA yet.

That said, I am totally convinced by this commercial. Yes. Convinced.

regisgoat January 28, 2009 at 4:58 am

This ad objectifies women. And vegetables.

Bruno January 28, 2009 at 6:11 am

The Superbowl has gotten so uptight after Jackson’s wardrobe “malfunction”. Imagine a breast! On the Teevee! Peta would of course try the same thing.

Meanwhile reporters are allowed unrestricted player locker room access. What kind of a message is that sending to impressionable young viewers?

Come here a minute January 28, 2009 at 6:19 am

But they still show the “boner pill” ads! Ugh! I guess if it’s about hot women it’s bad, but if it’s about old people fucking it’s okay.

DoctorCulturae January 28, 2009 at 6:37 am

Ha ha PETA. Right, love vegetables, not meat. Hawt, real hawt. Did the new Lesbian overlord of Iceland make this as an educational video to warn the evil footballers of the coming age of anti-meat-iosity?

dearest January 28, 2009 at 7:41 am

[re=230231]btwbfdimho[/re]: Should be PUTA, definitely. And that hot tub is more sopa than soap.

It’s about the lamest public thing ad in a while, and that’s a tough competition.

Toomush Infermashun January 28, 2009 at 7:53 am

I watched this fourteen times and still don’t see the harm in it…however, my sex life, well…..

AxmxZ January 28, 2009 at 8:11 am

Not unless Obama publically fellates a carrot.

sleepy January 28, 2009 at 8:12 am

[re=230258]snowg00n[/re]: yeah, i did not get that pumpkin deal. plus which, orange ain’t sexy?

mylesfromnowhere January 28, 2009 at 9:15 am

I found this neat little veggie processor that grinds and juices most veggies, you just let it work then, because it is all natural, you just eat the entire processor. Thank you Lord Jeebus for that gift! and the belt/shoes it makes. and fertilizer. Moo. also.

mylesfromnowhere January 28, 2009 at 9:17 am

[re=230395]mylesfromnowhere[/re]: oh and lets not talk about the good sex part, just saying

actor212 January 28, 2009 at 10:16 am

And thus we see the only way I’ll ever eat broccoli again.

bitchincamaro January 28, 2009 at 10:20 am

May I provide the cock sauce?

yorktronic January 28, 2009 at 10:47 am

So, I’m supposed to eat them? The vegetables.

thefrontpage January 28, 2009 at 10:58 am

Continually, repeatedly, PETA shows just how stupid they all are in that organization. Not vegetarians, which is fine, but PETA officials. Proposing a racy ad like this for the Super Bowl is just dumb, and then complaining about being turned down is dumb. And, hot babes aside (and they are hot), just doing an ad like this is dumb. PETA repeatedly fails to grasp any common-sense politics or zeitgeist connections, then complains like a whiny 8-year-old, and then wonders why everyone hates them.

Grow up!

Min January 28, 2009 at 11:24 am

So, promoting chemically-induced erections is fair game. Ogling scantily-clad women is fine. But vegetable porn is not acceptable?

i haz a confuzion

Inadequate Blackmail January 28, 2009 at 12:05 pm

The only problem I see in the ad is it makes vegetarians look like a bunch of dickheads who brag about their sex lives. I never knew vegetarians were so… macho.

saggyboobedhag January 28, 2009 at 12:10 pm

[re=230540]Min[/re]: The women sucking and rubbing vegetable porn was fine. Been there done that.

But vegetable ejaculation: too much.

recharged95 January 28, 2009 at 12:10 pm

Geez.

They could have saved 2/3rd’s the cost of that commercial by just having a nude sex kitten, blurred “pixels areas” announcing once line: “PETA.org”. Their paper ads are cheaper and more effective than this.

That’s what happens when you let ex-Victoria Secret PETA-wannbes into the club.
Genius.

RodneyToady January 28, 2009 at 12:50 pm

You all do realize that they never intended to get this aired, right? That the whole point was the controversy, so people would hear about it online or on the news, watch it for themselves, and then talk about it? If the ad was accepted, their operating budget would take a ridiculous hit.

Their marketing efforts are very erratic. You have things like this that work in generating free publicity, and they you have pointless things like the “Sea Kittens.” I can’t make any sense out of it.

Woodwards Friend January 28, 2009 at 1:13 pm

The Jains will not like this one bit. Exploiting vegitables for human enjoyment. Terrible/

One Yield Regular January 28, 2009 at 1:31 pm

I haven’t even watched it, and I’m already hungry for a pan-seared sea kitten with a side of foie gras encrusted sweetbreads, warmed over an old-growth redwood fire burning brightly in front of my polar bear rug and ivory footstool.

Crankenstank January 28, 2009 at 2:11 pm

I’d like to invite readers to join my group, Feminists Opposed to PETA (FOP). We’re entering this ad into the 2009 Cognitive Dissonance awards (also know as the “Ironies”).

(Speaking of political correctness, correct me if I’m wrong, I thought all PETA members were gay virgins?)

Dean Booth January 28, 2009 at 5:08 pm

Hitler and Ghandi and Louisa May Alcott had better sex?

DemmeFatale January 28, 2009 at 5:53 pm

Any theories yet on the woman+pumpkin action? WTF?

Kev-O-Tron January 28, 2009 at 6:26 pm

Studies also show that vegetarian food is often boring and bland.

Steeevyo January 28, 2009 at 8:11 pm

PETA makes me want to club a baby seal.

PartialFish January 29, 2009 at 3:23 pm

People
Eating
Tasty
Animals

wickedlittledoll January 30, 2009 at 2:45 pm

I don’t care how many vegetables you screw, bacon is still gonna taste a whole lot better than eggplant.
http://democralypsenow.blogspot.com/2009/01/why-peta-makes-us-hate-animals.html

Comments on this entry are closed.

Previous post:

Next post: