NO FATTIES  7:12 pm January 27, 2009


by Jim Newell

GAHH, here’s an insane joke from ancient oil baron George H.W. Bush about how he ran into “one of the ugliest, angriest women I’ve ever seen,” some lady who loved abortion, the punchline being that he would never in a million years have fucked her. Then Bill Clinton speaks — they were doing one of their little field trips together? — in awe of Bush’s ability to get away with that kind of humor, because, uh, George Bush Sr. never cheated on his wife (heheheheh). [YouTube]

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AxmxZ January 27, 2009 at 7:17 pm

Money can’t buy you love. Or class.

skyinator January 27, 2009 at 7:17 pm

Hey I resemble that remark!

SayItWithWookies January 27, 2009 at 7:22 pm

“…and I said to her, ‘Barbara, you haven’t had a womb in thirty years.’”

grevillea January 27, 2009 at 7:27 pm

And friends, that lady is here tonight. Please join me in welcoming Secretary of State Hillary Clinton.

cal January 27, 2009 at 7:32 pm

[re=230060]grevillea[/re]: Totes the punchline I was expecting!

Mustang January 27, 2009 at 7:35 pm

Hahahahahahahaha. Funny old fucker. HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAH.

Pat Pending January 27, 2009 at 7:40 pm

haha, that’s funnee cuz all da feminist lezbeans are ugly and angry!!!

what’s his excuse for plugging Barbara and making all that demon spawn?

StoneAge January 27, 2009 at 7:40 pm

Stay classy, Herbert Walker, Texas Ranger.

Origami January 27, 2009 at 7:41 pm

Bush Sr. can get away with it because no one gives a fuck about what Bush Sr. has to say.

Bruno January 27, 2009 at 7:44 pm

“I snuck out in the back entrance”. Well I know he’s a republican, but I never thought Bush was a closet gayz

Bruno January 27, 2009 at 7:45 pm

Can anyone get Jimmy Carter to tell any jokes?

Colander January 27, 2009 at 7:49 pm

” And I said, ‘no problem, lady.’ Then, when she turned around, I starts to buttfucking her, and I’m all like, ‘Is that better?’ “

grevillea January 27, 2009 at 7:54 pm

Hmmm, just a thought: wonder what the PUMAs make of Our Lady’s consort, St Bill the Black, apparently finding that story pretty fucking hilarious? HEEENGHH?

tallulah January 27, 2009 at 7:59 pm

Soo….did he ever look at Barb while he was creating American Leaders with her?????????

Min January 27, 2009 at 8:03 pm

It’s like a joke. Only different.

InsidiousTuna January 27, 2009 at 8:10 pm

I laughed.

Jim Newell January 27, 2009 at 8:10 pm

[re=230100]tallulah[/re]: Well Bush Sr. is so unbelievably rich, old and WASPy that he and Barbara basically had an arranged marriage between plutocratic New England families, for business alliance purposes.

nrkeyqueer January 27, 2009 at 8:14 pm

You’re gonna stay our of her womb, awesome. Now what do I hafta do to get you to stay out of my bedroom? Ummmm…and living room? And once in a while the kitchen?

Also, there are a few over policed woodland areas and airports with public bathrooms…you know what, never mind.

GlennBecksFelch January 27, 2009 at 8:15 pm

i bet he jerks off while watching his grandaughters sunbathe

InsidiousTuna January 27, 2009 at 8:18 pm

[re=230108]Jim Newell[/re]: So, no, then.

slowhansolo January 27, 2009 at 8:25 pm

I keep thinking of that notable photo of Prescott bemusedly straightening a hat brim perched atop a very young and beaming Richard Nixon.

Darehead January 27, 2009 at 8:39 pm

Anybody who stays married to Barbara without cheating has to be…

Hopey dont play that game January 27, 2009 at 8:49 pm

What do you expect from a guy who was wearing a “free mustache rides” shirt under his suit?

Nerdalicious January 27, 2009 at 8:51 pm

Oops! That crazy fat ugly lady was Bar! Let’s face it Georgie is “getting on in years” as the folks say. Flashback crying his guts out about his love for Jeb. The sick thing is this is how the Shrubry’s & wingnuts talk about the underclass they have s*** on for 12 years, in their private cocktail parties & 50 million dollar jet rides. It’s nice when they slip in public, like when Bar told the Katrina victims you are scaring us here in Texas and the Astrodome, & accomodations are better here for you on the Astro Turf then your crummy homes back in Orleans. Yes, once in awhile we get a glimpse into their inbreed creepy brains. Tanks Georgie. Sonny Boy did a heck of a job as in blow for this country didn’t he?

turkey lurkey January 27, 2009 at 9:02 pm

“And these were some of the lighter moments.”

Mahousu January 27, 2009 at 9:11 pm

[re=230085]Origami[/re]: Nobody cares what Bush Jr. has to say nowadays either.

That’s kind of a nice feeling.

Nerdalicious January 27, 2009 at 9:22 pm

I might add: We had the smelly influence of the Shrubry Family for 16 years including the arms for hostages debacle Georgie somehow masterminded under Reagan. Or should I say over Reagan.

Vanity Smurf January 27, 2009 at 9:26 pm

This is nothing. Wait until W. sobers up long enough to do some speechifying for teh munie$.

[re=230139]Nerdalicious[/re]: Don’t hate Big Momma for her blunt truth telling. That was her finest hour. There’s plenty of other reasons to vilify her, but that one comment was a golden turd of truth.

Teener January 27, 2009 at 9:36 pm

The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.

Am I crazy to hope that Bill Clinton was ever so subtly saying ‘that was an incredibly offensive think that other ex-president said’?

Vanity Smurf January 27, 2009 at 9:37 pm

[re=230149]Nerdalicious[/re]: Uh, that would be 20 years.

kingofnothing January 27, 2009 at 9:43 pm

Wouldn’t enter that womb. Wouldn’t be prudent.

Neon Trotsky January 27, 2009 at 9:52 pm

I will say though, that his son, George the W, has seemed on occasion from the distant look in his eyes of late that he would be more than willing to crawl back in Bar’s womb and spend the rest of his days there, clearing brush and dead tissue…

Mr Blifil January 27, 2009 at 10:03 pm

Sign me up to get wormed.

Nerdalicious January 27, 2009 at 10:04 pm

God I forgot that long national nightmare was 8 yrs. Freudian slip on my part. Of course how many of those yrs was Reagan really fully present?

ioksotot23 January 27, 2009 at 10:08 pm

Ain gaddah daddah, reeed mah lippps, ain gaddah daddah

villageatrois January 27, 2009 at 10:40 pm

Read Bab’s lips:


Fuck it — A way a lone a last a loved a long the riverrun, past Eve and Adam’s. Barb’s labes are circular, like generational circumlocutions from Hitler’s banker, Prescott Bush, to the the Neo-Nazi, Wubya Bush, to the almost-dreamed spawn of Jenna and Babs, Jr, of Paraguay. A way a lone a last a loved a long the….

shortsshortsshorts January 27, 2009 at 11:01 pm

When they find out about the Larry Sinclair thing, Obama is not only doomed, but will become a joke. Also, and. Also.

ladymacbeth January 27, 2009 at 11:02 pm

thank god we at wonkette are so much more refined.

PsycGirl January 27, 2009 at 11:05 pm

[re=230143]Mahousu[/re]: starting about 3 months before the end of his presidency, even.

WadISay January 27, 2009 at 11:14 pm

I think it’s safe to say that Heidi Klum doesn’t want him in her womb, either. Got a problem with that, Poppy?

Capitol Hillbilly January 27, 2009 at 11:31 pm

“No problem lady. Last time I got up in a woman’s womb, we spawned an idiot child who grew up to ruin the country.”

chascates January 27, 2009 at 11:38 pm

I think anyone of any sexual orientation would have trouble imaging sex with Barbara Bush. Aside from that, take a look at what that womb had produced.

schvitzatura January 28, 2009 at 12:37 am

A Cohiba cigar, a beret, and a protein-stained blue dress walked into a bar…

Remember to spay and neuter your nigras, after they’ve been wormed…

The Aristocrats!

I’ll be here the whole week. Tip your waitress. Try the veal!

Fucking amateurs!

davesnothere January 28, 2009 at 12:58 am

Who in god’s name was the audience for this putrescent display of America’s ignoble past? And to think, that weasel Clinton’s administrations were the good old days! Yuck.

BobLoblawLawBlog January 28, 2009 at 2:04 am

Oh, Bill, you blowhard. Whining that you can’t tell filthy pig jokes (which I expect from the Bush clan, seeing as they’re redneck aristocrats and all), not because they’re inappropriate in general, but because everyone in the world knows there is no woman so ugly you won’t fuck her…God, and then he took a shot at those crazy negroes and their dance moves. GAH!!!! Why do I still hate him so much, even now that the election’s over???

hobospacejungle January 28, 2009 at 3:27 am

Old man Bush may bring the funnee, but his ugliest woman in the world old hag Barbara really brought the house down talking about the Katrina victims huddled in the Astrodome:

“And so many of the people in the arena here, you know, were underprivileged anyway, so this–this (she chuckles slightly) is working very well for them.”

regisgoat January 28, 2009 at 4:56 am

Well, Pere Bush’s last joke not only brought down the house, it brought down the whole goddamn country. And here’s the punchline: we’ll be paying for it for the next 30 years!

DoctorCulturae January 28, 2009 at 6:45 am

And now we know another reason why Billbot is so enamored of Bush 1 (“the nitwit”): they get to talk all locker room dirty and such. Bill never had a dad to do that with. Bush 1 probably admires Bill’s sexiness past and present, feels awkward with any of his sons, and seeing how he’s chained to Barb, & Bill is chained to Hilz… well, quite a duo.

actor212 January 28, 2009 at 10:20 am

in awe of Bush’s ability to get away with that kind of humor, because, uh, George Bush Sr. never cheated on his wife (heheheheh).

Why not just name the tart in question?

Gennifer Fitzgerald.

See? It’s not even that hard to spell!

Lascauxcaveman January 28, 2009 at 12:13 pm

[re=230349]DoctorCulturae[/re]: Not exactly Hope & Crosby, but there is some undeniable chemistry there.

DoctorCulturae January 28, 2009 at 12:22 pm

Lascauxcaveman: Like the similarity. Since Hopemaster will be trashing both their legacies they may see more of each other than Bush 2, soon to be called the Medicated One.

2winners January 28, 2009 at 3:13 pm

Actually, George H.W. Bush DID cheat on his wife. Jennifer Fitzgerald was his long time mistress. But those were the good old days when the Press Corps kept things to themselves.

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