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NO FATTIES

Pig Of The Day: GEORGE BUSH SENIOR

GAHH, here’s an insane joke from ancient oil baron George H.W. Bush about how he ran into “one of the ugliest, angriest women I’ve ever seen,” some lady who loved abortion, the punchline being that he would never in a million years have fucked her. Then Bill Clinton speaks — they were doing one of their little field trips together? — in awe of Bush’s ability to get away with that kind of humor, because, uh, George Bush Sr. never cheated on his wife (heheheheh). [YouTube]


7:12 PM on Tue January 27 2009
By Jim Newell
16266 Views

  1. Money can’t buy you love. Or class.

  2. skyinator says at 7:17 pm, January 27th, 2009

    Hey I resemble that remark!

  3. SayItWithWookies says at 7:22 pm, January 27th, 2009

    “…and I said to her, ‘Barbara, you haven’t had a womb in thirty years.’”

  4. grevillea says at 7:27 pm, January 27th, 2009

    And friends, that lady is here tonight. Please join me in welcoming Secretary of State Hillary Clinton.

  5. grevillea: Totes the punchline I was expecting!

  6. Hahahahahahahaha. Funny old fucker. HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAH.

  7. Pat Pending says at 7:40 pm, January 27th, 2009

    haha, that’s funnee cuz all da feminist lezbeans are ugly and angry!!!

    what’s his excuse for plugging Barbara and making all that demon spawn?

  8. StoneAge says at 7:40 pm, January 27th, 2009

    Stay classy, Herbert Walker, Texas Ranger.

  9. Bush Sr. can get away with it because no one gives a fuck about what Bush Sr. has to say.

  10. “I snuck out in the back entrance”. Well I know he’s a republican, but I never thought Bush was a closet gayz

  11. Can anyone get Jimmy Carter to tell any jokes?

  12. Colander says at 7:49 pm, January 27th, 2009

    ” And I said, ‘no problem, lady.’ Then, when she turned around, I starts to buttfucking her, and I’m all like, ‘Is that better?’ “

  13. grevillea says at 7:54 pm, January 27th, 2009

    Hmmm, just a thought: wonder what the PUMAs make of Our Lady’s consort, St Bill the Black, apparently finding that story pretty fucking hilarious? HEEENGHH?

  14. tallulah says at 7:59 pm, January 27th, 2009

    Soo….did he ever look at Barb while he was creating American Leaders with her?????????

  15. It’s like a joke. Only different.

  16. InsidiousTuna says at 8:10 pm, January 27th, 2009

    I laughed.

  17. JimNewell says at 8:10 pm, January 27th, 2009

    tallulah: Well Bush Sr. is so unbelievably rich, old and WASPy that he and Barbara basically had an arranged marriage between plutocratic New England families, for business alliance purposes.

  18. nrkeyqueer says at 8:14 pm, January 27th, 2009

    You’re gonna stay our of her womb, awesome. Now what do I hafta do to get you to stay out of my bedroom? Ummmm…and living room? And once in a while the kitchen?

    Also, there are a few over policed woodland areas and airports with public bathrooms…you know what, never mind.

  19. GlennBecksFelch says at 8:15 pm, January 27th, 2009

    i bet he jerks off while watching his grandaughters sunbathe

  20. InsidiousTuna says at 8:18 pm, January 27th, 2009

    Jim Newell: So, no, then.

  21. slowhansolo says at 8:25 pm, January 27th, 2009

    I keep thinking of that notable photo of Prescott bemusedly straightening a hat brim perched atop a very young and beaming Richard Nixon.

  22. Darehead says at 8:39 pm, January 27th, 2009

    Anybody who stays married to Barbara without cheating has to be…..gay.

  23. Hopey dont play that game says at 8:49 pm, January 27th, 2009

    What do you expect from a guy who was wearing a “free mustache rides” shirt under his suit?

  24. Nerdalicious says at 8:51 pm, January 27th, 2009

    Oops! That crazy fat ugly lady was Bar! Let’s face it Georgie is “getting on in years” as the folks say. Flashback crying his guts out about his love for Jeb. The sick thing is this is how the Shrubry’s & wingnuts talk about the underclass they have s*** on for 12 years, in their private cocktail parties & 50 million dollar jet rides. It’s nice when they slip in public, like when Bar told the Katrina victims you are scaring us here in Texas and the Astrodome, & accomodations are better here for you on the Astro Turf then your crummy homes back in Orleans. Yes, once in awhile we get a glimpse into their inbreed creepy brains. Tanks Georgie. Sonny Boy did a heck of a job as in blow for this country didn’t he?

  25. turkey lurkey says at 9:02 pm, January 27th, 2009

    “And these were some of the lighter moments.”

  26. Origami: Nobody cares what Bush Jr. has to say nowadays either.

    That’s kind of a nice feeling.

  27. Nerdalicious says at 9:22 pm, January 27th, 2009

    I might add: We had the smelly influence of the Shrubry Family for 16 years including the arms for hostages debacle Georgie somehow masterminded under Reagan. Or should I say over Reagan.

  28. Vanity Smurf says at 9:26 pm, January 27th, 2009

    This is nothing. Wait until W. sobers up long enough to do some speechifying for teh munie$.

    Nerdalicious: Don’t hate Big Momma for her blunt truth telling. That was her finest hour. There’s plenty of other reasons to vilify her, but that one comment was a golden turd of truth.

  29. The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.

    Am I crazy to hope that Bill Clinton was ever so subtly saying ‘that was an incredibly offensive think that other ex-president said’?

  30. Vanity Smurf says at 9:37 pm, January 27th, 2009

    Nerdalicious: Uh, that would be 20 years.

  31. kingofnothing says at 9:43 pm, January 27th, 2009

    Wouldn’t enter that womb. Wouldn’t be prudent.

  32. Neon Trotsky says at 9:52 pm, January 27th, 2009

    I will say though, that his son, George the W, has seemed on occasion from the distant look in his eyes of late that he would be more than willing to crawl back in Bar’s womb and spend the rest of his days there, clearing brush and dead tissue…

  33. Mr Blifil says at 10:03 pm, January 27th, 2009

    Sign me up to get wormed.

  34. Nerdalicious says at 10:04 pm, January 27th, 2009

    God I forgot that long national nightmare was 8 yrs. Freudian slip on my part. Of course how many of those yrs was Reagan really fully present?

  35. ioksotot23 says at 10:08 pm, January 27th, 2009

    Ain gaddah daddah, reeed mah lippps, ain gaddah daddah

  36. villageatrois says at 10:40 pm, January 27th, 2009

    Read Bab’s lips:

    hnghmumbalikalicktywhangwhangguthurpanupherecomenowladdieandoantakenoturnaroundtheshrubsfiestingyerkeisterinsomeovallyofficefertheloveofsomgoddangedprinceofcalifornia

    Fuck it — A way a lone a last a loved a long the riverrun, past Eve and Adam’s. Barb’s labes are circular, like generational circumlocutions from Hitler’s banker, Prescott Bush, to the the Neo-Nazi, Wubya Bush, to the almost-dreamed spawn of Jenna and Babs, Jr, of Paraguay. A way a lone a last a loved a long the….

  37. shortsshortsshorts says at 11:01 pm, January 27th, 2009

    When they find out about the Larry Sinclair thing, Obama is not only doomed, but will become a joke. Also, and. Also.

  38. ladymacbeth says at 11:02 pm, January 27th, 2009

    thank god we at wonkette are so much more refined.

  39. PsycGirl says at 11:05 pm, January 27th, 2009

    Mahousu: starting about 3 months before the end of his presidency, even.

  40. I think it’s safe to say that Heidi Klum doesn’t want him in her womb, either. Got a problem with that, Poppy?

  41. Capitol Hillbilly says at 11:31 pm, January 27th, 2009

    “No problem lady. Last time I got up in a woman’s womb, we spawned an idiot child who grew up to ruin the country.”

  42. chascates says at 11:38 pm, January 27th, 2009

    I think anyone of any sexual orientation would have trouble imaging sex with Barbara Bush. Aside from that, take a look at what that womb had produced.

  43. schvitzatura says at 12:37 am, January 28th, 2009

    A Cohiba cigar, a beret, and a protein-stained blue dress walked into a bar…

    Remember to spay and neuter your nigras, after they’ve been wormed…

    The Aristocrats!

    I’ll be here the whole week. Tip your waitress. Try the veal!

    Fucking amateurs!

  44. davesnothere says at 12:58 am, January 28th, 2009

    Who in god’s name was the audience for this putrescent display of America’s ignoble past? And to think, that weasel Clinton’s administrations were the good old days! Yuck.

  45. BobLoblawLawBlog says at 2:04 am, January 28th, 2009

    Oh, Bill, you blowhard. Whining that you can’t tell filthy pig jokes (which I expect from the Bush clan, seeing as they’re redneck aristocrats and all), not because they’re inappropriate in general, but because everyone in the world knows there is no woman so ugly you won’t fuck her…God, and then he took a shot at those crazy negroes and their dance moves. GAH!!!! Why do I still hate him so much, even now that the election’s over???

  46. hobospacejungle says at 3:27 am, January 28th, 2009

    Old man Bush may bring the funnee, but his ugliest woman in the world old hag Barbara really brought the house down talking about the Katrina victims huddled in the Astrodome:

    “And so many of the people in the arena here, you know, were underprivileged anyway, so this–this (she chuckles slightly) is working very well for them.”

  47. regisgoat says at 4:56 am, January 28th, 2009

    Well, Pere Bush’s last joke not only brought down the house, it brought down the whole goddamn country. And here’s the punchline: we’ll be paying for it for the next 30 years!

  48. DoctorCulturae says at 6:45 am, January 28th, 2009

    And now we know another reason why Billbot is so enamored of Bush 1 (”the nitwit”): they get to talk all locker room dirty and such. Bill never had a dad to do that with. Bush 1 probably admires Bill’s sexiness past and present, feels awkward with any of his sons, and seeing how he’s chained to Barb, & Bill is chained to Hilz… well, quite a duo.

  49. actor212 says at 10:20 am, January 28th, 2009

    in awe of Bush’s ability to get away with that kind of humor, because, uh, George Bush Sr. never cheated on his wife (heheheheh).

    Why not just name the tart in question?

    Gennifer Fitzgerald.

    See? It’s not even that hard to spell!

  50. Lascauxcaveman says at 12:13 pm, January 28th, 2009

    DoctorCulturae: Not exactly Hope & Crosby, but there is some undeniable chemistry there.

  51. DoctorCulturae says at 12:22 pm, January 28th, 2009

    Lascauxcaveman: Like the similarity. Since Hopemaster will be trashing both their legacies they may see more of each other than Bush 2, soon to be called the Medicated One.

  52. 2winners says at 3:13 pm, January 28th, 2009

    Actually, George H.W. Bush DID cheat on his wife. Jennifer Fitzgerald was his long time mistress. But those were the good old days when the Press Corps kept things to themselves.

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