Dear House Republicans: It's 100% A Trap.

• The only people that like Obama at all anymore are a bunch of lazy illegals who wish they had jobs, and who, instead of just getting a job at a car plant or a Sam Goody (Not Bankrupt Yet! ™), hope that Obama can "create" jobs. Right. [ RedState ]

• Chuck Schumer will reprogram his new intern, Kirsten Gillibrand, as he pleases. He will start with her, hmm let's see, political identifications and belief system. That should do it. [ Ben Smith ]

• About a dozen House Republicans are headed to Rahm Emanuel's house tonight. House Republicans are known for their love of Kosher food. [ CNN Political Ticker ]

• When Obama took over Whitehouse.gov, he has prevented presidential historians from accessing such information of import as a video of First Dog Barney scurrying around Michael Phelps to the tune of "Ripple." This is not change.gov we can believe in. [ Daily Kos ]

• Obama is secretly planning on giving the entirety of the stimulus bill to his old friends The ACORNs. [ The Corner ]