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UNDERGROUND DOOM CAVES

And then they all died, the end.DEATH TUNNEL: It’s another on-the-ground report from our brave correspondent Josh Pfotenhauer! “Thousands of us are being funneled into the filthy road tunnel under the Mall,” he writes. “What could possibly go wrong? The brave souls are singing ‘god bless America’ to keep their spirits up, until the air runs out.”


10:02 AM on Tue January 20 2009
By Sara K. Smith
949 Views

  1. mattbolt says at 10:06 am, January 20th, 2009

    When “The Day D.C. Exploded” is turned into an acclaimed motion picture thriller event, I hope brave war blogger Sara “K.” Smith is played by the delightful Alyson Hannigan

  2. Monsieur Grumpe says at 10:07 am, January 20th, 2009

    Hey Josh, ever see Independence Day?

  3. mattbolt says at 10:07 am, January 20th, 2009

    I was sad to find out that this was the one and only usage of the tag “underground doom caves” in the dusty Wonkette archives. Oh well, there’s still a whole day of horror ahead of us to get that two-peat!

  4. SayItWithWookies says at 10:08 am, January 20th, 2009

    Oh, is this the part where they put the radio collars on all the white people?

  5. golliwog says at 10:08 am, January 20th, 2009

    DRUDGEREPORT has crashed

  6. facehead says at 10:09 am, January 20th, 2009

    Correction. That’s a photo of people waiting in line for the Porta Johns.

  7. If they ask you to strip naked and enter into a large room for a “delousing shower”, don’t do it!

  8. For anyone else at work with a choppy video stream, try the NPR stream.

    Warning: the NPR commentator basically has to point out, every 15 seconds, that all previous Presidents, from George Washington to George W. Bush, owned slaves, and this is Ironic.

  9. AngryBlakGuy says at 10:16 am, January 20th, 2009

    SayItWithWookies: …ummmmm no, this is where the white people get bar-codes tattooed on the back of their necks!

  10. They’re just going to close off each end and gas everyone inside. This was all an elaborate plot to uncover socialists in our midst. Barry’s already in Guantanamo and John McCain is being sworn in at noon. Hope and change that, liberals. Also, ask Josh if he knows Nancy’s number. I’ve got a thing for botoxed liars.

    http://thesebastards.blogspot.com/

  11. Cape Clod says at 10:18 am, January 20th, 2009

    If you see Orson Welles down there, shoot him on sight.

  12. Colander says at 10:20 am, January 20th, 2009

    jagorev: Anything’s gotta be better than watching Congress yell at each other, on C-Span, because they are all being escorted over by seniority, instead of alphabetical order.

  13. queeraselvis v 2.0 says at 10:22 am, January 20th, 2009

    I haven’t seen that much blue thermal wear since L.L. Bean’s last clearance event.

  14. Colander: So Robert Byrd goes first? This is as it should be, because “slaveowners first” is in fact in the constitution.

  15. SayItWithWookies says at 10:25 am, January 20th, 2009

    AngryBlakGuy: That’s bullshit. I specifically told the guy I wanted an artichoke and it should go on my shoulderblade.

  16. Mr Blifil says at 10:25 am, January 20th, 2009

    Oh the humanity…

  17. Texan Bulldoggette says at 10:29 am, January 20th, 2009

    Is Josh giraffe-neck Nancy’s son, husband, nephew? If so, he should know Wonkette readers are not what Nancy would consider real ‘merricans & she would not appreciate him consorting with us.

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