Wonkette
Oh hey look at that, it appears our next Attorney General is not some bilious torture-fetishist sack of ooze! In his testimony before the Senate today, Eric Holder gave answers so unequivocally Soft on Terror that even the most unrepentant liberal of all, Senator Patrick Leahy of the gay marriage state of Vermont, approved.
Addressing the subject of torture at the military prison in Guantánamo Bay, Cuba, Mr. Holder told Senator Patrick J. Leahy of Vermont, the committee chairman, “Waterboarding is torture.” It was so defined under the Spanish Inquisition and when used by the Japanese in World War II, he said, and it remains so today.
[...] Asked whether a president might have the power to immunize people against criminal charges if they employ waterboarding, which creates a drowning-like sensation, to obtain intelligence to use against terrorists, Mr. Holder answered unambiguously: “Mr. Chairman, no one is above the law.”
Holy moly, it is been so long since we’ve had an AG who wasn’t a tit-covering prude, a duplicitous and blundering weasel, or some guy named “Mukasey” that this straightforward sort of commentary is hard to interpret. Good thing Holder’s got that Marc Rich pardon problem, or else he would be TOO AWESOME TO EXIST.
Holder Tells Senators Waterboarding Is Torture [New York Times]
Ya I’ve lied at job interviews before too. Unicorn pics or GTFO.
“Mr. Chairman, no one is above the law.”
AHAHAHhaHhaa, YES!!! Fucking finally.
This man is not qualified to be AG. He does things like READ and REMEMBER. Obviously a muslin terrorist.
To hell with the Marc Rich thing. I give neither fig ni fart for it.
When he says “no one is above the law”, I starburst - just a little - in my pance.
yeah, but has he employed mexican servants or skipped out on any of his taxes? can he carry his stomach in a wheelbarrow? also.
I’m sorry, did he say no one is above the law??
http://politicsoffthegrid.files.wordpress.com/2007/06/above_the_law.jpg
Shit, we had Alberto Gonzo for AG. If he can do it, the homeless hobo who cross dresses in downtown Austin could be AG. They should be praying to Mecca (per Barry’s orders) in glee that we actually will have an AG who knows things–like the law & the Constitution.
…was that actually a straight answer on torture?! Does not compute!
Next he’ll be asserting that the Office of Legal Counsel is supposed to tell a president when something he wants to do is illegal rather than cobble together an elaborate rationalization that begins with “Once upon a time” and is kept secret forever to avoid embarra — uh, tipping our hand to our enemies.
Am I to read that as equating the Bush?cheney administration with the Spanish inquisition and WWII era Japanese POW/Death Camps? If so then BRAVO Mr. Holder! You go!
Yessss!!!! Let the prosecutions begin!
Yeah, you that say that waterboarding is torture when you have Oscar Wilde looking over your shoulder. Now repeat that when he’s left the room, Miss Mary.
So wait, your Attorney General can also be someone who, like, believes in enforcing the law? I don’t know if we can handle that kind of change.
Define no one.
Isn’t it sad that we’ve had so many evil shit-eating turds in the Justice Department for so long that when Holder says something as simple as I won’t torture people, we cream our panties? You know what America, I bet he won’t drink the blood of aborted fetuses either. So there’s that.
SayItWithWookies: Is there no end to Oscar’s perfidy? “Have you no shame, sir? Have you no shame?”
wow, the NYT only got 11 words in before they used the word taint. That must be some kind of a record
Serolf Divad: hahahahh so right. ftw
I’m Chiquita banana
And I’m here to reveal
We hired Colombian death squads
Holder tried to conceal
CorkPopper: Yessss! And torture the fuck out of the guilty!
Wait, first torture, and if it hurts, they are guilty.
/got it.
NoWireHangers: Yes, we are all battered spouses now. Pathetically grateful for any kindness.
Peoples, have we learned nothing from all those episodes of 24?
Off topic:
Can someone please explain to me why this asshat hasn’t asphyxiated on his own flatulence using the Excitable Andy Fetish Mask ™ yet?
He let Darth Vader torture Han Solo in the bowels of his “cloud City”
Geez, with Lando Calrissian as AG, won’t we have to worry about about him being conned by the Sorcerer of Tund, Rokur Gepta?!
upsidedownpaddle: spooky
Serolf Divad: You take that back, sir!
Sincerely,
The Association for the Crucifixion of Moorish Infidels
and
Daughters of the Kempeitai
upsidedownpaddle: All while drainin’ a 40 oz Colt 45.
You watch, this guy is going to sell us out to Darth Vader.
Lando wears a cape damnit!
Also, he doesn’t look Armenian, also?
He has that Riunite on ice, so nice mentality.
upsidedownpaddle: He didn’t realize what he was getting into, he just made a deal to keep the Empire out forever. Of course, that deal was getting worse all the time.
I don’t think we can declare people guilty, if they didn’t know they were not above the law. Many of them were mislead all these years to believe that they were above the law, and this guy comes and pulls the rug under them because he loves his precious laws. I just don’t think it’s fair.
Dildo Baggins: And how can we confirm an AG with known ties to tibanna gas smugglers?
Great. Next they’ll be telling us that benign things like “electrodes to the genitals” are right out too. Paintywaists the lot of them!
“Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!”
Maybe it’s finally time to break out the comfy chairs at Gitmo.
CorkPopper: Yes, we ARE pathetic. We’re celebrating because he said “no one is above the law”? And? And?? Call me when Hopey has dinner with Jonathan Turley.
That highly starched shirt he’s wearing has all the earmarks of being ironed by some dirty Mexican working off the books. And if not, she can be invented.
Neon Trotsky: “Tibanna gas smugglers”? Is that what we’re calling the closeted GOP-ers nowadays? If not, can it be?
I loved him as Lando in Star Wars, but without question his best performance was as “Billy” in Episode One of “L.A. Pool Party.”