About the author

A writer and editor of this website from 2006 to early 2012, Ken Layne is occassionally seen on Twitter and writes small books and is already haunting you from beyond (your) grave.

View all articles by Ken Layne


Hey there, Wonkeputians! Shypixel here to remind you to remember our Commenting Rules For Radicals, Enjoy!

  • american mutt

    Call this an unfair generalization but old black folks are no good at nothing. yes. i said that.

  • tiny mexican

    God damn it Rod Blagojevich, you really are the man.

  • JeffGoldblum

    So when does Blagojevich get sworn in as Secretary of Nailin’ Hot Broads?

  • Colander

    Yes! MLK must be doing the tootsie roll in heaven right now. I can’t wait to rub this in my Jew neighbor’s face.

  • ManchuCandidate

    What is going to be added?


  • Scarab

    Looking at the image at the beginning of the video I was hoping it was a clip of Burris bitch-slapping Cheney.

  • SayItWithWookies

    [re=219732]american mutt[/re]: Good lord — he was appointed by Blagojevich and sworn in by Cheney — hasn’t the man suffered enough?

  • Vercingatorix

    Reid…. you fuckin pussy.

  • Serolf Divad

    If Burris had a shred of self-respect he would have made a black-power fist at the end there.

  • Servo

    The phony mosquito swat that leaves a bruise.

  • President Beeblebrox

    The problem is that he won’t be able to carve “* U.S. Senator” under the “TRAIL BLAZER FIRST AFRICAN-AMERICAN IN ILLINOIS TO BECOME:” heading of his big luxury tomb because, well, he ain’t. Guess this will have to go under the “OTHER MAJOR ACCOMPLISHMENTS” part of the tomb.

    Damn, it’s a stone resume.

  • Gopherit

    This is the ultimate result of the sternly-worded memo theory of governance.

  • CollegeStudent

    Who was the white guy following him around and standing behind him? Was that Dick Durbin or Blagojevich’s Taint?

  • Serolf Divad

    [re=219750]President Beeblebrox[/re]:

    He’s probably the first appointed black Senator, though. That should count for something.

  • dannygutters

    How hilarious would it have been if he had etched his appointment into the tomb before this.

  • Reefpilot

    Wonkette, this overt racism needs to stop. The PUMAs may enjoy it when they’re not talking about farts or inadequate black males, but you’re making the black jesus cry.

  • MattW

    [re=219750]President Beeblebrox[/re]: Hopefully it includes how many words he can carve per minute.

  • cal

    So then racism must be over?

  • Noodle Salad

    I’m beginning to think I should appoint myself the new Senator from Nevada. Harry Reid will surrender faster than a French Draftee.

  • S.Luggo

    how do you like your browneyed boy
    Mister Blago

  • bitchincamaro

    The least he could do in thanks for personal Dick ceremony is make room in the crypt for Cheney’s much deserved and long overdue dirt nap.

  • JeffGoldblum

    [re=219763]Noodle Salad[/re]: I know you didn’t just slander the French… TELL ME YOU DIDN’T JUST SLANDER THE FRENCH

  • shanemacgowan

    I still don’t understand why this is viewed as such a major victory for Blagojevich. Getting Roland Burris sworn into the Senate will not keep him out of jail.

  • LittlePig

    I like what Jon Stewart photoshopped on it: “World’s Smallest Penis”.

  • wickedlittledoll
  • Neon Trotsky

    There is a reason why Burris wasn’t more animated and joyous–Dick Durbin mouthbreathing on one’s neck is enough to strike fear into the heart of even the bravest person…

  • rambone

    This is a proud day for middling individuals everywhere.

  • shortsshortsshorts

    Oh Jesus, all snark aside. I mean what Blago did was bad and all, but a black guy in the Senate?
    Strom Thurmond does not approve.

  • Mahousu

    [re=219778]rambone[/re]: Indeed. For the first time in my life, I am proud of my country.

  • Kwame&#39

    I think hieroglyphics are in order now.

  • jetjaguar

    Wow, that two whole minutes of racism being over was awesome.

  • President Beeblebrox

    I’m waiting for teh Wonkettes to post something about Joe Biden’s farewell speech. He was supposed to start at 10am, so he should be wrapping up just about now, God love ‘im.

  • Noodle Salad

    [re=219770]JeffGoldblum[/re]: What does it say when comparing a lowly French draftee to our Senate Majority leader is an insult to the French? Bravo, Reid. I owe an apology to the French military. Harry owes an apology to the universe.

  • Bruno

    Haha, Barry is so screwed! He let this bozo get sworn into his senate seat, days before he is ruled as an UNNATURAL BORNE CITIZEN OF MUZZIE AND AFRICANOINDONESIO EVIL.

  • Jukesgrrl

    [re=219750]President Beeblebrox[/re]: I don’t think it’s going to go on either tablet. I think he’s going to add an additional piece of marble above the word “Burris” that says, “United States Senator.” His family is probably now meeting with cemetery management to negotiate the addition of neon.

  • queeraselvis v 2.0

    [re=219778]rambone[/re]: This is a proud day for TAINTS everywhere.

    There. Fixed that for you.

  • bitchincamaro

    [re=219790]Jukesgrrl[/re]: That tombstone deserves to be Blingee’d, fo’ sho’. Anybody?

  • loudmouthredhead

    “First black senator of IL with a white taint”?
    I’d call that a classy memorial.

  • pdiddycornchips


    Blago ain’t going to jail. The whole thing will blow over soon because Blago will resign his post to become the fifth judge on American Idol. Those trips to hollywood are valuable fucking things, why should he give it away?

  • problemwithcaring

    [re=219771]shanemacgowan[/re]: Srsly. Where is the medal for dick slapping Harry Reid in the face?

  • TGY

    Great, now please put Blago away for 3 eons + life for being a disgrace to the human race.

  • jetjaguar
  • Jukesgrrl

    [re=219888]jetjaguar[/re]: When you go see that tomb and it actually DOES have a disco ball on it, you sue his ass. You were there first; I’ll be your witness.

  • josereyes.theroof

    Egomaniac? That’s the Senate, & Bill Frist was first among equals (heart surgeon and Senator? Insufferable!).

  • BlueOx

    Roland Burris gets sworn in, and planes fall from the sky. You do the math. While you’re doing the math, I will be tucked away in my panic room.

  • villageatrois

    Fuk yez, Wonkers! Roland Burris has been a good guy for a long time. If he would add a graphic to his crypt that said, “A – Phi – A” and “Blago-Muerto”, would you be happy?

    And also — you can’t dance worth a shit.