So it looks like Obama is serious about this, and intends to become the president next week. Here’s the official Presidential Portrait of your favorite new Commander in Chief, wearing one of those phoney-baloney American Flag pins. This picture was reportedly taken by Pete Souza yesterday. Presumptuous. Click for the giant version, and then masturbate to it, for America.
{ 106 comments }
Where’s teh unicorn?
Cry bitter tears, wingnuts.
~
Hmm…shaved the horns down a bit I see…
How big can I blow this up? Seriously.
OMG we elected THIS DUDE? I thought I was voting for Will Ferrell! Shit!!!!!
Ok all jokes aside, this is a fairly uncool looking picture for a guy who almost never looks uncool. What’s up photographer? And Background-Setter-Upper? I think Hopey looks better with a red or burgundy tie.
Wow… his ears ARE pretty big.
I don’t think this is going to transfer to velvet well.
I’m hetero male, and either this portrait is making me feel funny in my weener, or that urinary tract infection is acting up again.
[re=219174]j6n[/re]: Google for Rasterbator. Sersleh.
[re=219178]obfuscator[/re]: He has a nice tan, though.
It’s a fake. That flag has 57 stars and the flag pin was obviously added in Photoshop. Why won’t NobaMA release his real portrait? Hennghh?
I get the American flag back there, but what’s with the other foreign jobbie striving for pride of place? Have we been led down the primrose path only to find that at the so-called Inauguration he will declare himself to be King Kwami of the Independent Pretorian Alliance of Africanus Maximus?
Barry should have pulled out his electric shaver & gotten rid of his 5 o’ clock ‘stache shadow. Oops, gotta go watch my favorite brown boyfriend Fareed Zakaria on TDS.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vcZ9ku_wInw
The Puma’s respond.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TJ_Sqj7JUn8&feature=related
Ears.
This picture makes me wonder… how long will it be until we see our next white male President? I doubt if we’re going to get any in the next few cycles… probably not until the mid-century mark. Here’s how I see it going:
2009-2016: Barry Hussein Obama
2017-2024: Bobby Piyush Jindal
2025-2032: Chelsea Clinton
2033-2040: Miley Cyrus
2041-2048: Malia Obama
2049-2056: Trig!
[re=219186]Mr Blifil[/re]: that’s the Great Seal of the United States, which is, obviously, a Masonic symbol. Gotta have one in every Presidential portrait, it’s the law.
[re=219180]jagorev[/re]: Starbursts.
Lighting by Ray Charles.
[re=219188]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: Honestly, how long have you been waiting to post that?
[re=219202]gliberal[/re]: Wardrobe by Gov. Paterson?
[re=219194]jagorev[/re]:
You forgot the Co-Consulship of the Bush Twins
Before inauguration day. Before he begins his evil gay agenda…
http://democralypsenow.blogspot.com/2009/01/homosexuals-may-soon-be-able-to-die-for.html
I think they should just hang a picture of one of Montel Williams’s Obama coins.
damn, just wasted 1/2 hour trying to find the 6 things different in the two pictures.
[re=219181]jagorev[/re]: I was thinking the color plotter @ work, but this looks even better.
[re=219194]jagorev[/re]:
2057-3309 Zogg the Hungry from Nembulax.
He will run on the not so soon to be infamous “Breeders Will Be Rewarded” campaign.
That’s a really nice silk tie.
[re=219204]j6n[/re]:
Too long.
at 10000x you can see the words on the flag pin: made in china
[re=219205]jagorev[/re]: And the new guy from American Idol
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hpnPX5pUvg0
I guess he had to wear the flag pin to prove his bonafides but he should have pinned a cross next to it for good measure. One with the dead Jewish guy hanging on for best effect.
What’s wrong with you peoples!!?11?!
This has been up for just under an hour and nobody, I mean NOBODY has run it thru the Blingee Machine?
Obama Girl most certainly disapproves and there won’t be any Truck Nutz for any of you lot.
Hope you’re happy with yourselves.
why is he wearing the same tie that every teenage boy wears for his senior portrait? did michelle forget to lay out his clothes before he left for work in the morning?
bad outfit aside, it’s a little awkward to feel like your president is undressing you with his eyes… this portrait will sooo lower workplace productivity in federal buildings.
[re=219198]jagorev[/re]: You sure that isn’t the official flag of the Republic of Muslin? Why won’t NOBAMA HUSSEIN tell us the truth, for once
[re=219194]jagorev[/re]: I am SO planning to be dead before the Trig years…
Yawn. Needs blingee.
Sigh. The one thing I can’t stand about Barry is that he’s made me such a cliche. And a besotted one, at that. Hi, Hopey!
[re=219227]Barack Like Me, Bitches[/re]: Obama girl… mmm, warm donut! She belongs to the new Prez, for he is the Kwisatz Haderach.
It’s off center and I hate it.
I am an American living abroad, and now I actually look forward to my next embassy visit.
I just realized my post this afternoon about a shrunken Larry Kudlow dildo flopped because I called him Ludlow. Ah, fuck it. He’s still a dildo, and I still prefer not to know his name.
Ohhh. This picture just makes me say “Ohhh.” He’s litte too old to be my baby boy – but if I were his mama, I would just say, “Ohhh. I’m so proud of you, baby.”
bArrIe eS Secksie. Eie Posted eit alll over mie blawg.
[re=219194]jagorev[/re]: WRONG
2009-2016: Hussein
2020-2024: Hu Jintao
2024-forever: Trig the Conquerer.
oh and 2016-2020 is Lanny Davis
Remember this photo well, fellow ‘murrikans. For it is the last time you will see your sexy president elect before he goes white haired and prematurely ages to the point of looking like a muslin David Brinkley.
[re=219239]sanantonerose[/re]: True. Where’s the Official Blingee of the President of the United States of America? Why there’s no Blingee.gov site?
Submitted for Wonkette’s approval.
http://blingee.com/blingee/view/81206379-HALF-BREED-MUSLIN
This is your president before job-related stress. Remember it.
[re=219285]TheeFauxhemian[/re]: Brilliant! Love the kitty and the tiara, and the cigarette! Love love love.
[re=219289]Mojopo[/re]:
Thank ya’ kindly.
Isn’t the Kitty’s enthusiasm for socialism and post-term abortions infectious?
[re=219290]TheeFauxhemian[/re]: Completely infectious. Worse than any antibiotic-resistant infection I know of.
[re=219291]Mojopo[/re]:
Adorable Kittens: 1
Ebola: 0
This is obviously not a real photo. You can’t see his hallo at all, and their is no wisp of smoke from his cigarette.
At least they took the photo from an angle that you can’t see that he is uncircumcised.
Eh, he looks kinda dorky in this one.
That photographer should be shot.
[re=219173]Mr Blifil[/re]: I thought you could only see the horns by the light of a full moon.
[re=219194]jagorev[/re]: [re=219272]Jim Newell[/re]: Wrong. Prophesy says that when Miley Cyrus loses her virginity, the Apocalypse begins.
[re=219187]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: I was just thinking he looked a bit unshaven. Or maybe that’s what he’s going for…cause he’s all sexay like that.
[re=219206]pepe[/re]: Does “co-consulship” word have anything to do with championship rib eating? Cause those two look like they could suck a bone dry in record time. If you know what I mean. *wink*
So is this the photo I should hang above my door, Stalin style?
Wire to all U.S. embassies:
You may now burn all your Bush portraits, after throwing shoes at them.
[re=219194]jagorev[/re]: Remember, Trig is part Native Alaskan. He has been dealing with prejudice his entire life.
http://www.adn.com/news/alaska/newsreader/story/531155.html
According to Gizmodo this is the first official presidential portrait taken with a digital camera… probably to facilitate Photoshopping-out the “666″ birthmark next to Hopey’s left temple.
[re=219311]Bruno[/re]:
We definitely need an Obama Communist mural.
This sucks. Dammit, Wonkette, I’m trying to waste time at work in my usual fashion (appearing to be working, but really writing bullshit about buttsecks), and there’s just nothing snarkworthy. Where’s Palin? Can’t we liveblog her throwdown with Huckabee or something? I think we could title it “The Hillbilly Rasslin’ Match That Makes Jeebus Cry.”
Yes we can!
Now when I come out of Silver Spring Metro, I won’t have to avert my eyes from the portraits of the Evil Ones at NOAA. I didn’t have to look but my eyes were always drawn to them-and I would hear voices saying “waterboarding is good, the Constitution is for wimps, Your soul is ours”. The first day President Hopey’s picture goes up-I am going to applaud at the NOAA entrance- really!
[re=219251]2druk2phluq[/re]: I heard Obama girl is going to be part of the group reading historical documents at the Newseum on Sunday-what the hell is that about???(Obama girl- not the reading)
Good morning, and welcome to the last Thursday George W. Bush will be president of the US.
[re=219313]Come here a minute[/re]:
Wooo hoooo! The old photos are coming down in the lobbies! Sayonara, Dubya and Belezabub! Don’t let the screen door hit you on the way out!
It’s like, how much more black could it be? And the answer is none. None more black.
[re=219339]regisgoat[/re]: well that made my day.
[re=219339]regisgoat[/re]: You just made me smile for the first time this morning.
Ohhh! My new Democratic blue butt plug came in today! Just in time for the inauguration. Yay!
This is not a picture of our new half-breed muzlin overloard. Where is William Ayers and Osama with coat hangers forcing abortions on high school girls and forcing Christians to deny their god?
THIS IS NOT WHAT I VOTED FOR!!!1!!
Meh. The tie’s too wide.
[re=219256]gurukalehuru[/re]: Oh, me too! Hit the road cheerless death mask portrait of Dick Cheney! (shiver)
The tie was carefully designed to appease the Evangelicals who wanted Pat Robertson for Prez.
Do they make wallpaper with this pic?
The tie is NOT from the Rush Limbaugh collection, as you will not find a single stripe on his ties.
I skimmed the comments and looks like nobody else noticed this:
The flag is a red herring.
If you notice, he’s sending out a secret message to all of us. He’s leaning, ever so slightly, to his left.
I am still stunned by the fact that our country actually was dragged kicking and screaming into the mid-20th century and elected someone other than a rich white guy. It makes me happy for my kids that they’ll grow up in a world where it really is possible that we might be approaching the end of the traditional hegemony.
hutzlionelesq@gmail.com: The apocalpyse began three years ago?
Whoever Photoshopped the turban away needs to put it back. You can tell it’s been doctored — the top of his head is too round.
The last time I felt like this is when I sang The Battle Hymn of the Republic for Governor Reagan in Jr. High.
[re=219422]Carlo Wildwood[/re]: Win! And yes, the apocalypse started already? Why do you think we’ve been buying hobo beans? And killing zombies? Delicious, delicious zombies.
[re=219337]finallyhappy[/re]: You’re at NOAA? I’m at a Sea Grant program (where, needless to say: I, for one, am ready to welcome our NOAA overlords…)
You expect us to masturbate to that, Layne? It might be enough for straight women and gay men, but us straight men need something more: try the big version: http://change.gov/page/-/officialportrait.jpg
[re=219426]Mitchbailey[/re]: Ewww. I sang (with choir school) something-or-other xmas stuff for Nixon, 8th grade I think. Still got a huge (but blurry) color picture of us posed with him.
Lot’s o’photoshop here I’m afraid, all to present info: very carefully placed prominent pin, too much highlight on his ears (“he listens,” okay we get it), he’s already much grayer than as presented, and extraordinary detail in his forehead (“and he’s smart too”). But the direct, no bs look says “I care for you, but I can also take it to the hoop myself and dunk on yo ass. Your choice.”
Though I don’t like the shirt and tie (Is he a member of the Rotary Club?) it is far preferable to the Repubsmut fascisti white shirt and godawful red tie. Pleeze oh pleeze let us burn all red ties…
Ha ha Bush lost suck it wingnuts!
This really calls for a Blingee competition!
[re=219479]sezme[/re]: Does The Confluence have that link, also?
[re=219232]sarcasticusername[/re]: I’m already familiar with that feeling, thanks to the fact that a 16×20 of this has hung in my mom’s basement for as long as I can remember:
http://www.s9.com/images/portraits/33542_John-F-Kennedy.jpg
It looks like he has a handsome smattering of those freckles black people get as they age. Zexy.
Fap fap fap fap fap fap fap. Who wants to go get some chili dogs? Fap fap fap fap fap fap fap.
he looks like such a kid. who has just done something cheeky.
Dark skin – check
Flag pin – check
Genyooine presidential flag – check
Wingnuts’ heads sploding – checkmate
One of the hardest thing about taking my near blind friend with kidney failure to the Social Security Disability Office in Pomona every other week, is staring up at that fucking grinning-like-a-jackass picture of W, while arguing with some Cal State Northridge graduate about carryover cents on copies of gas bills and such.
Not having to see a Republitard up there for four more years brings stinging tears of angry and relief to my eyes right now and I don’t care what you snark-y motherfukkas think!
Barry on.
[re=219424]robanybody[/re]: And they also photoshopped him pale. I KNOW he is much, much darker. No turban, pale,… AND he is wearing an American Flag. This is not the man I know.
They forgot to trim the loose thread on his top shirt button, details details…..poor photographer.
It will be a good day when you don’t have to see that obnoxiously smurky Cheney photo in all the Fed buildings.
You know, he looks like a human being. Very un-politician of him.
Oh Thank you Lord!
Yeah, picture the Anaheim Convention Center, thousands of kids from private (Christian) shcool choirs from all over California singing Ronald Reagan’s favority hymn to him: “Mine eyes have seen the glory coming of the Lord…” I love Obama, but I hope he leaves the “Grapes of Wrath” stuff out.
Comments on this entry are closed.