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Joe the pork-addicted boozebagHa ha, how awesome would it be if Joe “Sam” Wurzelbacher really didn’t have the money to get home from Israel and he had to stay there, forever, until the Israelis deported him for being such a horrible douche? (Or until he got esploded by a Hamas rocket, of course.) In honor of this fine Web site, your Wonkette will be starting a fraudulent PayPal collection scheme where we’ll be “raising money” to keep Joe in Israel/Gaza. All proceeds will be diverted to support Wonkette’s Patriotic Inaugural Ball. [Joe the Journalist aka Joe the plumber]

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62 COMMENTS

  1. He’s interviewing Obama? In Gaza? That seems unlikely, being as Obama’s on a whole different hemisphere. I’d prefer to think that’s an epic prank by the Obama staff than a really shoddy lie.

  2. Well considering that the shitty Palestinian rockets have only managed to kill like, a dozen Israelis and the Israeli shells and airforce and missles and so on have killed like 12,000, I think the chances of him being hit by Israeli fire are far more likely, and would produce far more hilarity and delicious, delicious schadenfreude-chocolate-heroin-gasms for all.

  3. PJTV stiffing Joe on his return ticket would be funnier than 10 million PUMAS not helping Hillary Clinton pay her campaign debts. Suck it losers…

  4. What happened, did Pajama Pundit or whatever the crap name of that right wing stupid fest is run out of money or decide that JTP’s absence from the US actually increased the overall US IQ score now that the hillbilly’s are dying off from too much inbreeding (see previous post).

  5. On Jan 12, 2009 I was invited to an remote place in the Gaza strip to interview Obama the most sought after person in the world.

    Er, what does that even mean?

  6. [re=218758]Dave J.[/re]: My bet is that it’s a joke from those morning radio clowns. Joe refese to go to a remote Gaza location until they threw in a meeting with Sarkozy as well.

    Either that or someone has taken the Safari concept for Nigerian scammers to a whole new level.

  7. Joe should completely worry about using his knowledge of the sewers to gain Gaza access instead of just tooling around bothering nice Reuters camerapeople (they don’t go to his job and stop him from laying pipe) – this dude turned out to be such a bald sack of pooh. McCain should lick his head.

  8. “In honor of this fine Web site, your Wonkette will be starting a fraudulent PayPal collection scheme where we’ll be “raising money” to keep Joe in Israel/Gaza.”

    Does it really have to be fradulent? The man was hawking digital tuners.

    I will personally raffle off my dog to see this happen.

  9. Damn, that Obama chap is a political genius! First he roofies every conservative blogger on the planet so that they fall in love with him, and then he totally PWNS! Joe the Asshat and strands his ass in Gaza. If I hadn’t already voted for him, I’d totally vote for him again. I <3 him.

  10. Wait, isn’t he the rich guy with the tax problem that “O” bama wouldn’t fix for him? That guy? Needs help getting plane fare? Screw that asshat…take out a loan, fukstik.

  11. [re=218752]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: “What happened, did Pajama Pundit or whatever the crap name of that right wing stupid fest is run out of money or decide that JTP’s absence from the US actually increased the overall US IQ score now that the hillbilly’s are dying off from too much inbreeding (see previous post).”

    I sent them a note asking the honest question of why JTP was saying that they didn’t pay for his ticket back.

  12. A few clicks and a google search reveals that the site is the creation of Mark Tahiliani, a convicted on-line “natural supplements” fraud artist and the defendant in some wingnut “writ of mandamus” suit from 2007 naming Alberto Gonzalez and Michael Chertoff as defendants. in other words, Joe the Plumber’s exact peer and duplicate.

  13. I’ve got my checkbook out, but now I’m thinking, “How the hell they gonna keep Joe in Gaza?” If you give the money directly to Joe, he’ll probably buy some chew and some beer and a crate of beanie weenies, but it’s unlikely you’ll keep him there for long. Maybe you could send him the money, and put up a fake flyer on that street where he hangs out advertising a plumbing business for sale, because remember that’s how this all got started.

  14. Can we rendition his pimply ass to Darfur or something? Or sell him into sexual slavery? He’s an attention whore so he might as well be a whore in every other sense of the word as well.

    Also.

  15. JTP has a ‘gmail’ account? He’s got AOL or netzero written all over him. Plus, a tip for the Rhodes Scholar. His legions of mouth-breathing fans don’t know who the fuck Samuel Wurzelbacher is; he might want to stay with the name that brung him fortune & fame. You know: Joetheplumber@aol.com.

  16. If Israel deported him to Gaza or one of the really nutball settlements, that..I don’t think I could put into words how awesome that would be.

  17. For his protection, I suggest we weld him inside a 55 gallon steel drum and cleverly hide it underwater somewhere the evildoers wouldn’t think of looking.

  18. Since the blogger awards are over I will click on this site over and over again until I can get the visitor count up to an estimable level. FOR JOE!

  19. [re=218891]magic titty[/re]: [re=218858]BadKitty[/re]: Come play! I don’t think there’s even a moderator because my comment went up right away!

  20. Somebody needs to tell Joe/Sam that he could make a pretty good living being a *real* prostitute, and he could do it right back here in the States! All he needs to do is pick a city (NYC would be good, but I guess Columbus would do in a pinch), make a sandwich board that advertises “Joe the Plumber Blow-Jobs, 50 bucks!”, then just walk up and down the sidewalks downtown. He probably has a panel van, being a plumber and all, so he just takes his client to the van, sucks him off and takes the money. Rinse and repeat.

    I’m really surprised that he hasn’t already thought of this.

  21. THAT IS NOT DONATE.BARACKOBAMA.COM

    All the images and links go to donate.barackobama.com but the site is just a scam to harvest credit card info.

    FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DON’T DO IT YOU IMBECILES.

  22. I am a avid Obama supporter and it is definitely Barack Obama site. I have purchased here in the past during his run for office. I just donated $150 again and I will be getting my awesome tee-shirt in 2 to 3 week as I did back in August. If you look at the source code it goes the the President elects’ secure server. Below is the source code… frame src=”https://donate.barackobama.com/page/contribute/dnc08victoryshirt1?source=feature”

    I am so glad I found this website once again. Thank you wonkette.com

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