Wonkette
In his latest dramatic attempt to charm the remaining elitist Republicans out of their doomed party of dumb rednecks, Super-President Barack Obama went to George Will’s walled castle in suburban Maryland on Tuesday night to share arugula and vintage Bordeaux with all of Will’s douchebag columnist friends. David Brooks was there! So was the “lightning rod conservative,” Bill Kristol. Charles Krauthammer was there, too! Can you imagine a dinner party even 2% as fun as this one?
This was probably a lot like the wingnut pundits’ magic Alaskan lunch with Sarah Palin, but all the GOP writers were able to use their “fancy words.”
Barack Obama is DESTROYING whatever’s left of the Opposition, by going to its house, and having dinner. What a weird eight years this will be ….
Dinner Party Goes Bipartisan [NYT]
Dancing girls danced, gifts were given, promises were promised, and the evening ended with a mutual vow to destroy Social Security.
Changiness.
You just know that prick George Will counted the silverware when Barry left.
Oh C’MON. Who would you invite first if you were President? I would bring Bill Ayers for emotional support.
HEAR THAT PUMAS WE HAVE A CHANCE IN THIS THING.
I would also bring Abe Lincoln’s corpse for domestic situations. Obviously I would then have a winning team. Also.
Maybe I would bring on Dennis Miller, for dramatic effect.
Gosh, what a fun crowd!
I wish I was there to chide Mr. Kristol about ‘discovering’ Sara Palin for the Repubs, to gently tease Brooks about his slight Canadian accent, to chat about baseball history with Will, and to smash that fat, smug Krauthammer mug into a bloody pulp with one of the Rickey Henderson autographed bats Mr. Will brought in as a conversation starter.
I hope one of those guys had the courage to ask Barry for his real birth certificate while they waited for dinner to arrive.
Lascauxcaveman: Also.
Conversation starter for Obama with each guest in turn: So, have you ever been right about anything?
This sounds like the plot to that terrible movie The Last Supper, only our Barry is the Neo-Nazi.
DON”T GO ITZ A TRAP!!1!
According to the Times, he was there for more than two and a half hours. How long does it take to implant the Symbiont?
Is Rushblow at this meeting, too? His website says: “Jason filled in while El Rushbo was called away to a super-secret meeting in Washington D.C.”
George “Triumph Des Willens” Will sez: I can’t even have a dish of Oregon Boosenberry without runnin’ into one of them!
Oh and Bill Kristol should be Secretary of Nothing, which should net him $150 sweet sweet bucks. I can’t thing of a better reason to help a douche.
saggyboobedhag: SHADOW EL RUSHBO GUVDERMINT.
shortsshortsshorts:
“Oh C’MON. Who would you invite first if you were Presiden?”
1. Mothra
2. Bizarro Superman
3. Jombie
“But first…. The Whores!!!”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VJNsZgHCVKU
Dear God, it is the worse FOX Round Table ever. Can you image dinner with Charles “The Evil Gnome of Conservatism” Krauthammer, David “What, Were You Speaking” Brooks, George “You Make Dennis Miller Seem Funny” Will and Bill “Hey, I Might Be Right, Sometime” Kristol. Was this an attempt to get Obama to kill himself before he becomes president?
Still, it must have been fun when they brought out the birthday cake in the shape of Iran.
shortsshortsshorts: “Maybe I would bring on Dennis Miller”, as a self-loathimg bacterium.
Lionel Hutz Esq.: I can recall when, in 2007, on the ABC Sunday news roundtable, the WaPo “Walter Reed” reporter Dana Priest shouted down Krauthammer and kept up her fiery invective against him thru the point when ABC had to turn to a commercial. That was real TV.
Hell, Obama just invited me and my buddies for a kegger in his basement, it’s kinda BYOB but he’s got a sick flip-cup table and there might be beer pong and some pizza
This is the ugly side of diplomacy. Eventually Obama is going to have to sunbathe topless with Pat Buchanan, too. I’m bracing myself. “It’s good for us, it’s good for us,” I keep saying. And it makes me feel like Sybil. In the old dazes, we broke bread with people who had the same political ideologies as we do. Now? Man, it’s a free-for-all, what with all of that getting along poopy. Mind blowing!
I thought the point of winning the election was that these conservatives are no longer relevant, no longer good for anything but pointing and laughing at. Does Hopey think these guys aren’t going to continue to brain him verbally in their weekly word vomits?
And if the point of this dinner was blowjobs under the table then why wasn’t Lady Dame Pegglington von Nooningsnatch invited? Oh yeah, I forgot Brooks was there. My bad.
COOTIES!
shortsshortsshorts: With a guest line-up like that, my surprise dinner date would be a hankerchief loaded with live [i]Clostridium botulinum[/i]… along with a single dose of botulinum antitoxin.
…they were probably awe struck at his ability to use a knife and fork!
George Will’s dinner parties are usually awesome. Everybody wears their PJs, and they stay up ’til midnight eating cookie dough, braiding each other’s hair, and talking about boys they like.
Joe the Plumber was unavailable.
…excluding Barry, that entire group has 3 brain cells between the four of them. They have to pass them around everytime of them wants speak(or write), kinda like the Graeae witches from Greek mythology who had to share single eyeball.
Main topics of discussion included:
Baseball, Iran, David Brooks’ gay pink ties…
It’ll be interesting to see how many write pandering columns this week about how humble Barack was and how they were all so surprised at how great his manners were and how he wasn’t “hollerin’ for iced tea” throughout the dinner.
I’m still amazed that George Will lives in Maryland. Doesn’t he know that outside the walled enclaves of Potomac, Chevy Chase, and maybe Bethesda, that minorities and liberals abound here? THe could accidentally drive into Wheaton or the People’s Republic of Takoma Park if his chauffeur isn’t particularly careful.
Terry: He lives in Chevy Chase, see the NYT article. Barack was the first black person to go there in 5 years
If Bill Kristol writes his next column about how he now has faith in Obama and how awesome he is going to be, we are all in deep shit.
Actually, as hideous as this evening sounds from a social perspective, we should be seeing the results of this clambake on the Sunday chat shows right away. Will–weirdly, the most sensible of this bunch, despite his mulish insistence that there is no such thing as global warming–he’ll probably be the first to tone it down about Barack, but the others will follow suit.
If Obama had worn an explosive vest to that dinner and detonated it after the salad course, his Presidency would have gone down as one of the most effective in history, despite the fact that it end on week before his inauguration.
Meh, this sounds like a snooze-fest. Now if they would just post a webcam in the breakroom at the NYT Op-Ed department…I’d pay to watch Bill Kristol and Bono vie for the last muffin.
Bill Kristol was overheard saying, “M.F.-er, I want more iced tea.”
Krauthammer is like a comic book villain, all evil and wheel-chairy.
My mental image of this dinner has Bill Kristol in a high chair, throwing his macaroni and cheese on the floor.
I strongly suspect that the dinner column will be titled:
“My Dinner with O
SBama.”Rukasu:
The first black person who wasn’t cleaning, fixing, gardening, or delivering something, actually.
It went well until after dinner when a cat fight broke out between Brooks and Bill Kristol whether they played a round of Charades or Twister and Will suggested a rousing round of circle jerk.
He just came over to see if they had any Kryptonite walled up in a glass-fronted case somewhere…. Nope. Well, you never know….
That sounds like the manifest for the Voyage of the Damned.
Too bad he didn’t go to dinner w/ Kristol, Kraut, Hannity, Limbaugh to legitimize these dingbats and keep the right reviled for years to come. Heck, have dinner with everyone at FOX - make sure someone cuts up Doocy’s food for him and get him a bib.
Imagine Barry’s surprise when the circle jerk began.
Lascauxcaveman: It’s so rare that someone articulates a perfect agenda. Just one thing, could we use the bats on Kristol as well?
“Since arriving in Washington more than a week ago, Mr. Obama’s outings have included trips to his transition headquarters, Capitol Hill, the White House, and a surprise jaunt to Ben’s Chili Bowl”
NOOOOOOOO, Barry! Surprise jaunts to Ben’s Chili Bowl always end in something bad (just ask Kwame).
Bypartizoa: Sarcasm aside, also. +1.
Hopey is just doing what the black man does best, getting his hos in order. And he’s so slick that they don’t even know they’re his hos yet.
Oh, he’s not Bubba, who just wanted to be loved and then pissed in his own sandbox.
Hopey’s going to call ‘em up at three a.m. and THEY’LL answer the phone. And he be all like, “Bitchez where’s my money?!”
You want proof? How soon after the Inauguration do you think Palin’s kid gets transferred from boning Iraqi hoors (Nom nom nom) in the Green Zone to a real firefight?
Now Caribou Barbie shoulda realized you don’t mess with the black man. His chit is DEEP, man.
Word.
MathewBrooks: yep, you’re right, same manifest of guests that took the cruise to Alaska to visit the “You Betcha” queen…I knew it looked familiar…
Well that’s it then, they’ve turned Hopey, he’s gone over to the Darkside of the farce….
You Wonketteers make me larf.
I really hope Peggy Noonan was there and embarrassed herself by crushing on Barry like a teenage girl.
I met Krauthammer once. We were both at an “event” in a semi-public place. I recognized him and went to say hello- as there were only a few people there. He told me it was too cold and to turn up the heat. I guess everyone he doesn’t recognize is a servant or employee to him. I, being not nice, I didn’t say ” I don’t work here” I said “I’ll take care of it” I guess he stayed cold.
Lionel Hutz Esq.:
The fun quickly ended when Helen Thomas jumped out of the cake.
Guess who’s coming to dinner?
did they dance the night away to that old classic, barack the magic negro? i bet they all did the white man’s overbite, barry is familiar with that one too.
i bet he didn’t take michelle to this garbage, she wouldn’t have the patience for that level of stupid; if he was dumb enough to try it, then president or not, he’s not getting laid for at least 6 months.
WTF! Some revolution this is. In a rational, fair planet, Bill Kristol and Krauty would be working as Joe W’s helpers in cleaning out sewerage pipes; not dining with the Prez-elect or continuing to spew their bs over the pages of major newspapers. Meanwhile Howard Dean, the dude who like kind took a lot of shit to set up Obama in his new gig can’t tickets to a White House tour.
Dammit, I want guillotines and reeducation camps.
AngryBlakGuy: Just when I think you are the coolest there is out there, AngryBlakGuy, you top yourself. The Graeae reference is a WIN.
At the end of the evening, Rush jumped out of a cake.
p-Sludge: Thank you for giving me nightmares.
If Kristol’s dinner skills mirror those of his column-writing, he probably poured the soup down his pants and impaled himself on the salad fork several times.
finallyhappy: dude reminds me of Mario Cantone
AngryBlakGuy: LMFAO. Win.
OK, where is the fucking backup? Where’s Rahm the Ballet Assassin or Joe Biden with his Magic Lair Plugs and Laughing Gaff Attacks? Where’s the fucking muscle? Barry has got to stop pulling this solo shit.
OReillysVibrator: This is pretty much what I was thinking. That Obama met with these tools suggests that they’re the vanguard of conservative thought. But if he met with Limbaugh and O’Reilly and their ilk, the Republican party would be shamed into permanent minority status. It’s kind of like how conservatives scream about Cindy Sheehan, Michael Moore and Jane Fonda of thirty years ago as the true menaces of the Democrats. Same idea.
p-Sludge: How odd. He usually jumps into them.
shortsshortsshorts: S.Luggo: Dennis could represent the “two-pump chump” vote…so I’ve heard.
I heard he arm wrestled Kristol to the point where his (Kristol’s) Karpal Tunnel flared badly, and then he (Obama) punched David Brooks in the cock.
In retrospect, singing Mammy on one knee may have been overdoing it a tad, setting aside reconcilliation and inclusiveness for the time being…
Kristol, Brooks and Will are three of the last assholes on earth that Barack Obama should be wasting his time with. They are hacks, poseurs, and, if you read their columns, you can see that they’re all slightly crazy, politically and intellectually. Seriously, Obama should not be wasting his time, or the taxpayers’ time, with these morons. There are literally about 500 other, better journalists who Obama should be spending his time with.
thefrontpage: Bill Kristol is a liberal mole. Or a member of the ruling élite. I know this because he’s published in the New York Times and because he was teaching at Harvard University last year. You have to be a liberal élitist to do either of those things, let alone both. (You also have to be a liberal élitist in order to bother with the accent mark when typing the word élite, which is good for me, because I’ll never have the influence to flash my liberal élitist creds the way Kristol gets to. It’s more important to me, because I like black coffee and hate lattés.)
And they were all surprised that he wasn’t screaming “mother fucker, I want more iced tea!”
Larry McAwful: Man it would suck to go to all the trouble of getting into Harvard just to get locked outduring registration to the point where you end up in Bill Kristol’s class.
did brooks finally show barry where that top secret applebee’s salad bar is?
I once had a root canal that sounds like more fun that this dinner party.
I wonder if Rich “Little Starbursts” Lowry (National Review) was able to tear himself away from his Sarah Palin DVDs and make it to this dinner party? Nah. He loves Sarah too much to ever leave home, where he can fire up a pot of moose chili and fantasize about hot sex with his Wasilla Hillbilly.
To make up for this Hopey should have to spend an evening watching bull dyke porn with Rachael Maddow.
Now they’re all going to write the same damn article next week. Booooring.
Terry: Or raising someone’s kids, don’t forget.
Bad move on Barry’s part. Now everyone will want to invite him to dinner and will whine publicly went he doesn’t show. Campbell Brown makes a wicked lasagna and O’Reilly promised to make ‘luffas.’
Gorillionaire: I’d so do that.
chascates: I’d be terrified that O’Reilly would either try to give him a falafel rubdown, or serve those loofas with sides of baba ganoush and hummus. Either prospect makes me physically ill, but for different reasons.
Did he bring his food taster, cause I sure would have.
Lascauxcaveman: All Canadian accents are slight (totally not counting Maritimers, Newfies, or the Quebecois).
FOX ROUNDTABLE CONSENSUS: Obama “Well-Spoken”
What, these elitists are dissing the knuckle-dragger wing of the party? No Pat Buchanan? Surely not all the servants were illegals. But no Palin? ‘Sup with that? This party will slight idiots at its peril. After all, their presidential candidates since WWII have ranged in IQ from mediocre to moron, in keeping with their base.
A return to diplomacy after 8 years divorced from it is one thing, but meeting with these low life wack jobs might be carrying things too far.
Tommy Says Ira G is a Tool: Right, and everything you know about the black man, you learned from “Tropic Thunder.”