Wonkette
- The Obamas are going to have turkey and ham for Christmas. Wait, isn’t that against their religion? [Washington Post]
- The Chicago airport was designed and built by Lucifer himself, who put a fancy “twist” on the hellscape by shrouding it in a six-foot layer of snow and ice. These days O’Hare airport specializes in ensnaring honeymooning Irish people, who will never visit America again. [Los Angeles Times]
- Huzzah, the New Depression has not prevented modern Brits — whose founding father Charles Dickens invented Christmas — from affirming their most basic values on the most important day of the year. Which is to say, they are all shopping their pants off instead of going to church. [Guardian]
- Meanwhile, Iraqi Christians are celebrating this blessed day by going to church and getting patted down by security guards checking for bombs. [Reuters]
- The real Maria von Trapp’s real and actual grandson is a DISH. [New York Times]
- Science proves it: Sleep is good for you! And so back to bed. [ABC News]
Children. Little mini-devils all of them. Paper strewn everywhere. Who the fuck is supposed to clean up this mess? Assholes.
Mr Blifil: Sounds like spanking time. Next year, have a green Christmas:
http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2008/12/12/LVQC14F72K.DTL
SKS, thank you for coming to work today. As you can tell, all of us commenters have been waiting up all night for you to come and give us a lot of snarky gifts. Hope you found them milk and cookies we left for you too.
Back to shopping.
*raises 9 a.m. white russian* Merry Freakin Xmas!
“This was supposed to be a pit stop,” said Siobhan Costello, 30, who wandered the terminal with her husband. “But there’s nothing you can do.”
There are about 75 bars in O’Hare. They are open for 24 hours. There is no need to go outside. However, if you are tempted to spend a little alone time with your newly betrothed, stay away from the men’s rooms. As Larry Craig and that female football fan from Iowa can tell you, that never works out well.
shanemcgowan: You’re saying that in Illinois the moral police will put surveillance and shame on a married heterosexual couple if they make Christian babies in the men’s room?
Darehead: That’s what the “Family Facilities” are for.
Honeymooning Irish people? I believe that usually consists of a bottle in a paper bag and a gutter. An airport is definitely a step up.
Merry Irish Xmas
And now some music!
http://www.treehugger.com/files/2008/12/singing-coal-from-clean-coal-industry.php
When a Brit says shopping their pants off, this actually refers to their underwear. If so, count me in, can’t find that in any church I know (except maybe those Raelians who had their Iraeli sex party canceled…would avoid those alien loving cloners no matter how much sex promised).
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/12/24/sex-fest-for-world-peace_n_153351.html
I’ve been to the Trapp Family Lodge in Stowe- the most exciting thing was the little red squirrel who runs through the lodge at tea time(or probably any time)-I never saw the hot guy.
No Christmas for this Jew. However in honor of the birth of your Savior(and as penance for what we did to him), I am serving dinner to the homeless. No need to thank me-I will tell them I’m doing it in the name of Wonkette
I can’t gauge the hotness of Von Trapp the younger. He is going to have to take his shirt off. If it’s good enough for the president-elect it’s good enough for the singing Austrian.
Darehead:
Milk and Cookies?
I left a bottle of Glenfiddich and Nachos.
I never knew the von Trapps were real. What’s next, the Sherman Klump?
Merry Christmas, Ken, Sara & Jim. This little community you’ve created is an angry, happy, funny place where I spend way too much time. Sort of like an intellectual strip club (or one imagines such a place would be like).
The juxtaposition of faith and fear is one that resonates across Iraq…
Awww, they’re just like us. Merry Christmas all you non-atheists out there.
Half breed muslins can eat ham. It’s the pickled feet they shy away from.
It’s christmas in heaven.