Wonkette
- CALIFORNIA’S TERRIBLE POLITICS, CONDENSED: “California’s budget mess got messier Thursday as Democratic legislators approved a package of tax increases and spending cuts, Republican legislators threatened to sue over the package’s questionable constitutionality and Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger made the issue moot by promising to veto it. Democratic legislative leaders then announced lawmakers are going home for the holidays.” Won’t it be fun in the next couple of years when no state in the country is able to put together a budget? By then, California will already have been given back to Spain. [Digby]
Budgets? We don’t need no stinking budgets!
The 2/3 budget requirement in the California Constitution is the dumbest fucking shit ever.
I thought Cal was one of those states that was pretty much used to always having a huge permanent deficit? So American!
This is awesome–legislators from all the populated counties in CA get together and try to solve problems, and a small handful of hateful conservative goat farmers from Inyokern generally act like assholes and fuck everything up for everyone.
…I thought “Prop-8″ was suppose to solve everything?
Didn’t the Govenator get his job because of a budget deficit? Watch your back Arnie.
The big earthquake so long prayed for by right wing hate peddlers will be the most anticlimactic event in history. All successful gay people will have moved to their artificial winter homes in Dubai, or their completely genuine summer homes on the lush beaches and warm water of the Arctic Ocean. A few crippled beaners who couldn’t escape will be trapped in some rubble. Hopefully the survivors will unite to capture Rick Warren and live fat off his bloated corpse.
Fuck, NOW who’s going to buy all the Canuckistani hydroponic that keeps our balance of trade accounts in the black? The Grateful Dead used to speak for most of it, but after Jerry died, others stepped in to pick up the slack. If’n Cauly-fohnia is broke, we’re screwed. Higher than usual, because there’s more to go around up here, but still screwed.
To Spain? Surely you mean Aztlan! You’ll be among the first against the wall when the revolution comes!
It’s a good thing they prevented teh Gayz from getting married and contributing millions to their budget! California families are now safe to beg on the streets and not have to see two men holding hands. Way to go, Rick Warren!
This is par for the course in Cali, though. Democrats try desperately to pass a budget, the Republicans piss and moan about everything, and in the end, the state workers get to live off of IOUs.
Yay! No government services for me and 33 million of my compadres…! I can’t wait until the daily commute on the 405 is so pot-holed that the whole thing is one big crater.
Raumfahrer: Why the fuck did I use the term “Cali”??? I fucking hate that word. Someone please throw rotten eggs at me now.
What’s the problem? All they have to do is eliminate a $40 billion deficit. And since tax cuts solve everything, there doesn’t seem to be a problem. Unless Republican policies only work under ideal circumstances.
D’oh…that gay marriage cash would come in handy right about now, eh, fellow Californians?
http://www.petergreenberg.com/2008/05/30/news-analysis-gay-marriage-could-be-worth-billions-for-california/
Raumfahrer: Double d’oh, I totally copied your comment….well, great minds something something, right? And yes, you deserve a rotten egg or two for “Cali.”
California needs to amend its constitution to allow budgets to pass by simple majority. That, or have a budget gridlock lottery where a legislator is picked at random and publicly executed every day they go over. That’ll teach ‘em to come to a compromise solution real quick.
I love that it’s easier to fuck the gaiz (and not in the way we like) than it is to pass a budget in California.
assistant/atlas: Yes, literally the only people I have ever heard use the term “Cali” in person were my fuckwit idiot and possibly inbred cousins from the midwest. I think I had a slight seizure when I was writing or something.
And oh, it’s billions of dollars apparently! I was lowballing it.
That’s alright though, because the Republicans have a MUCH better solution, involving cutting funding for education and health care. Just what we need right now…
They should just ask for a bailout.
I go to city college in los angeles. we’re being screwed already. some folks didn’t get their financial aid until finals. I hope I gets mine next year still. My mom and I call free college our 40 acres and a mule. I don’t plan to ever pay back my loans. fuck it man.
Less talk. More monorails!
I was part of this group once, see. It was all about vets and peace, connected loosely with an anarchist syndicalist libertarian loop, only there was a broad overarching generic project and no steps to it. We held meetings and didn’t have an agenda and nobody knew how to go about our mission if someone would just explain it to us. It wasn’t really a functional group. In California, you know. Anyway, we all broke for the holidays one year, and then nobody bothered to return! Right, we never officially disbanded, nor admitted failure, we just never quite reconvened. Durndest group I ever saw.
I think it’s possible I would be happier being a citizen of Spain at this point. Am hoping for big things from Hopey, but it seems to me that nothing he can do will stop us from having an $80 billion dollar deficit by this time next year, and one of my three jobs (the best one) is working for the state. The end.
Ah, California. Land where it’s easier to amend Constitution than to issue a bond.
California would not satisfy the Maastricht economic requirements (debt > 3% percent of GDP) to get into the European Union. But then, neither would the US. Nor would most of the countries in Europe, today.
Bowdoin: Did you ever think that maybe this is how anarchists naturally organize themselves?
as a new jersey resident, it’s difficult for me to imagine ever saying this, but…
i’m glad i don’t live in california.
an actor [sort of] for a governor.
then the gayz denial.
now this.
earthquake anyone?
“Difference between and Hockey Mom and a Pitbull–Meth,”
Olbermann. I like it…
Sorry, just getting caught up on this Trig-mom-Palin-Bristol-baby-meth lab thingy.
Come with me if you want to prosper…
Maybe California should start some sort of pirate operation. Those guys over off Africa are the only people on earth making money right now.
Yay California! We saved the chickens, but can’t put together a working budget. I <3 my state!
The State of California is in negotiations with the guy who guessed the exact price and won BOTH showcases on The Price is Right. He will give California a perfect budget and Drew Carey will yawn.
I think it was Mexico that California belonged to… Anyway, it would solve all our immigration problems. Since all the Mexicans are here already and everything.
California, a prime example of the Republican attempt — beginning with Governor Ronny Reagan — to “starve the beast [of the socialist welfare government]” by slashing taxes. [See, e.g., Howard Jarrvis’s Proposition 8 limiting the local realty tax.] Ha, ha, asshole California voters, after buying into the Republican smoke and mirrors about a trickle-down economy thru lower taxes, suddenly you might see that you can’t get what you don’t pay for. In the meantime, t’ant pis. Eat cake.
— Angry Liberal
There was a pic of Schwarzenegger as Conan (R-Barbarian) next to the stories about CA budget problems on Google news yesterday. It was kinda neat, in a “ha ha … whatever” kinda way.
In times of budget crisis, isn’t ita California tradition to recall the Guv?
DustBowlBlues: Yup. Better to recall Voldemort and install Smigel, my precious, than to face higher taxes to cover services.
At least for today.
Canuckledragger: “The Grateful Dead used to speak for most of it, but after Jerry died, others stepped in to pick up the slack.”
i, for one, am encouraged by the efforts of slack-picker-uppers. watch here as Squeak, The Squirrel, picks up slack to get a nut. and another nut. and another nut. “who knew squirrels could pull rope hand-over-hand?” Californian budgeteers could learn a thing or two from the neighboring squirrels of Crater Lake. (no rights reserved, 1957)
Squeak the Squirrel gets my kudos for being “a Working Class Hero who, inspite of what obstacles ‘the Man’ puts in his way, always perseveres.” i hope there are more of us….
enjoy!
http://www.archive.org/details/squeak_the_squirrel
2druk2phluq: I wouldn’t encourage being Dubai if you are too flamboyent. The police will be out to get you:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/07/17/dubai-detains-foreigners_n_113443.html
Of course with so much pent-up frustration, the local boyz will be very interested in you though.
PS: The chief Californian budgeteer should stock up on Nut Wizards. har-har
http://www.nutwizard.com/
Aurelio: Well, it’s true, we caused nobody any trouble after that sabbatical … which continues.
indigo: Well, at least in the Southwest and Texas, we, unlike the Israelis, do allow a limited Right of Return.
OOOOKKKKAAAAAYYYY.
I hate to do this, but this guy had a great explanation of the budget situation (IT ES WITHIN THE CHAT THINGIE):
2:46 PM Colin: you should read this
http://www.newgeography.com/content/00479-bailing-out-california-again
27 minutes
3:14 PM me: shitty
it looks like a paultard wrote that
OMG I CAN SPOT A PAULTARD FROM A MILE AWAY
he is one!
3:18 PM Colin: so youre saying that california is not in deep trouble
?
3:19 PM me: Naw we are totally fine
3:20 PM Colin: cool
the author from what he has done otherwise seems to be a total nutjob
3:21 PM me: what has he done
3:24 PM Colin: be an asshat
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0595399487?ie=UTF8&tag=newgeogrcom-20&linkCode=as2&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=0595399487
that is the dumbest thesis I’ve ever heard in my fucing life
me: HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
3:25 PM HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHH!!!!!
LMAO
Oh my fucking Gawd
3:26 PM Colin: geewiz bob, don’t you hate those commies who won’t let us develop? Yes Jim. Its so stupid. I mean, it makes land more expensive through population pressures instead of doing God’s work of adding value to property by developing on it.
Yes predeveloped land is worthless
that is for the n****s
damn inner cities
and they can’t even build more roads to support our glorious dream
3:27 PM yes Bob, that is true
god I hate those people who try and ruin our dreams
the dreams of our rich fathers
(which is the name of my new book)
“Dreams from my Rich Father”
me: “fuck you, black people”
3:28 PM It worked for Detroit!
“motor city” sprawled out and cant contract now that nobody lives there anymore.
Colin: yes, it can destroy development to recreate suburban centers
3:30 PM me: obviously
no really that is the most retarded thing ever
Colin: you posted that to facebook? Awesome
me: I have never seen such a retarded book
I had too. It was that retarded
Colin: right?
oh jesus its soooooo stupid
me: Retarded doesn’t even give that book justice
Colin: so yeah, point, CA is fucked budgetwise
3:31 PM me: pretty much, but we knew that
Colin: and I made that point using a douchewhole
god…my bad
yo
me: I dont want that coming from douchewhole
I totally called the paultard thing though
Colin: but you were wrong
its just RETARTED
TARD
me: not at all! paultards love sprawl!
Colin: RETARD
me: RETARDED IS CORREKKT
shorts: “worked for Detroit…” line : we haven’t been able to have a budget in Michigan since 2000 and now everyone blames our hot Canadian import…we’re all hoping she ends up on Obama’s team, but it doesn’t look like it… so we just want to know - is Spain buying? because, otherwise, I’m starting a rally to buy back Detroit - I figure we need about $900 bucks - can I count you in for $5, as a major shareholder (just the downtown 20 block square)….?
tennessee Jed clampett: Ah ha, so there is a technological reason for the massive Walnuts shortage this year.
shortsshortsshorts:
Dear Shortsx3 — I don’t understand this post. plz mak mur smpl, kthxbye
HuddledMass: It is a testimony against genocidal children in Eastern Alabama who will kill us all, obviously.
It’s baby Jeebus punishing them for all teh buttsex going on in that modern day Saddam and Gonorrhea. Since he personaly got Prop 8 passed, by definition it’s all sin, in fact it’s a double sin. One for teh buttsex, one for not keeping it in the bonds of holy matrimony.
Now Ahnold is a righteous man who loves god and fears baby Jeebus but in teh face off all that buttsex, what can one man do? He’s like Lot, except I don’t think he’s molested his children yet. He has a lot of money, but that’s all Terminator money so we probably shouldn’t bother him for any. He’d pull our spines out of our bodies for our troubles and then climb a tree to wave our bloody parts at the full moon while baying like a mad beast, if history is any guide. Why did you guys elect him anyway, he’s awfully….severe.
But, like I said, a righteous man who fears baby Jeebus.
So, I guess that it’s then, you guys are going to Spain. I think we’re about ready to cut Texas loose as well. If New Hampshire doesn’t get it’s head out of its ass it’s going back to England, or maybe Somalia since England took one look at the Granite State and decided it was a neo-northern Ireland without all the adorable accents and famine.
Well, my arms are getting tired cranking this generator and my hobo sandwich is getting soggy on the steam grate. Officer Pudanko is going to make me find another doorway to sleep in if I don’t give him a hand job so I gotta go.
Miss ya Cali, write if you find work…
Toomush Infermashun: I’ve been saying it all along, 25 cents on the dollar and we can finally get rid of poor, poor Detroit. I know it’s sold at a loss, but I’ll give it to you for $50 bucks and a used condom.
Which Spain?
Make southern California a penal colony. Build a huge fuckin’ wall along the northern borderline of Kern and San Bernardino counties and have it run south along the Nevada border. The foundation of said wall shall be filled with nuclear waste to discourage tunneling. Sit back and watch the Bakersfield cowboys and the South-Central gangbangers kill each other on television.
http://democralypsenow.blogspot.com/
I thought the deficit was because all their budget is going for defense: ABMs and WMDs and the state militia and sh*t. Air National Guard. Like in case they get invaded by all those tree-huggers in Oregon. Whatever.
What am I missing?