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WAR ON XMAS

December 19, 2008

Wise Man Willie Brings Dope To Baby Jesus

by Ken Layne  


Still sad because False Unicorn Barack Obama won’t legalize it? Here’s heroic Texan Willie Nelson, dressed as the Angel Mohammad, bringing the gift of ganja to the Baby Jesus. This is apparently from a Stephen Colbert Christmas Special (?!), so Happy Xmas. [High Times]

{ 51 comments }

TGY December 19, 2008 at 1:39 pm

Well, heck, I know *my* IQ dropped a few points just from watching that sans weed.

DeLand DeLakes December 19, 2008 at 1:39 pm

God, I love this video. You would be amazed by the people on The Colbert Nation who claimed to be grievously offended by this (Is there anybody out there who is watching that show under the presumption that he’s for real?)

problemwithcaring December 19, 2008 at 1:41 pm

[re=203159]DeLand DeLakes[/re]: What? He ain’t for real?

problemwithcaring December 19, 2008 at 1:42 pm

Play the nutmeg song next!

Doglessliberal December 19, 2008 at 1:43 pm

Willie for head of DEA!

SayItWithWookies December 19, 2008 at 1:43 pm

[re=203159]DeLand DeLakes[/re]: They should take the honkin’ big bud out of their own eye before they complain about the seed in someone else’s.

heroinmule December 19, 2008 at 1:48 pm

Clearly Ken knows that my supplies are low, and I’m being taunted with this post.

facehead December 19, 2008 at 1:50 pm

[re=203159]DeLand DeLakes[/re]: [re=203163]problemwithcaring[/re]: Wait a second, Stephen Colbert doesn’t exist? What about Willie Nelson?

Fucking computer graphics.

ManchuCandidate December 19, 2008 at 1:52 pm

[re=203159]DeLand DeLakes[/re]:
Yes, there are.

When one is cognitive dissonant, one doesn’t need drugs to be in an altered reality.

chascates December 19, 2008 at 1:53 pm

Willie smokes the good stuff. He can afford it. Barry should at least have some sort of subsidy for the rest of us to buy it.
ALso Jim Newell was right. The blank right-hand site of the Wonkette sight reflects the blankness in my heart. I DO miss Campbell Brown. But not badly enough to buy a teevee to watch her.

shortsshortsshorts December 19, 2008 at 1:53 pm

I just bought 5,000 copies of this DVD, cause I’m really fuckin’ high.

DeLand DeLakes December 19, 2008 at 1:54 pm

[re=203159]DeLand DeLakes[/re]: [re=203176]facehead[/re]: Correction: Stephen Colbert is the most real person out there, but people who are offended by the sight of the Baby Jeebus in a cloud of ganja, or of Colbert batting his eyelashes at Tony Perkins should not watch it. And Willie Nelson is only as real as a wise old sagebrush sprite can be on this mortal plane.

IceCreamEmpress December 19, 2008 at 1:58 pm

Colbert can do it all. The Johnny Mathis falsetto!

gurukalehuru December 19, 2008 at 1:59 pm

Legalize myrhhihuana!

Naked Bunny with a Whip December 19, 2008 at 2:00 pm

The pot has kept Willie looking pretty good for a guy who died 14 years ago. Medicinal indeed!

Darehead December 19, 2008 at 2:01 pm

[re=203187]IceCreamEmpress[/re]: Apparently. And I fell in love. Best gift ever.

actor212 December 19, 2008 at 2:02 pm

I distinctly remember the old hymn, “Jesus Christ Smoke De Doob”. I was taught it by a Faloshe, one of the 13th tribe living in Ethiopia.

Never could quite figure out the hair, tho. Looked like dreadlocks….

ManchuCandidate December 19, 2008 at 2:03 pm

[re=203183]shortsshortsshorts[/re]:
I was gonna do some some work, until I got high
I was gonna send out some emails and do a report , But then I got high
My job is still fucked And I’m posting on Wonkette, (why man) ‘cuz I got high
Because I got high
Because I got high

I was just hanging out with a friend, until I got (contact) high
I was sort of hungry and decided to order some food, But then I got high
I discovered I put $200 bucks worth of takeout Sushi on my AMex, (why man) ‘cuz I got high
Because I got high
Because I got high

freakishlystrong December 19, 2008 at 2:04 pm

Towlie and Baby Jeebus got haaaahhh..

ManchuCandidate December 19, 2008 at 2:04 pm

At this point, the “Bong Hits of Jeebus” kid is crying.

Neilist December 19, 2008 at 2:06 pm

As an Official Crabby Old Bastard, my first thought was “Why is that wino wearing a dishtowel on his head?”

But then I started to listen to the lyrics.

And I realized that only three words could describe this:

Best. Christmas. Carol. EVERY.

(Okay, four words. Don’t get technical. I’m emotionally overwhelmed.)

:::Sniff:::

ManchuCandidate December 19, 2008 at 2:08 pm

[re=203202]ManchuCandidate[/re]:
Um, FOR not OF.

Moran.

shortsshortsshorts December 19, 2008 at 2:09 pm

[re=203206]Neilist[/re]: I pwn a copy of this DVD, and after DETAILED review of it, this is actually the best Christmas Carol ever:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e0N0oFQjshQ.

for your eyes only.

honkeyman December 19, 2008 at 2:10 pm

Are you high?

Oooooh Yes!

shanemcgowan December 19, 2008 at 2:13 pm

Plow man, dig my herb.

p-Sludge December 19, 2008 at 2:14 pm

TELL OBAMA
DON’T
forget

Iraqi
Refugees

CAN’T
get HIGH

finallyhappy December 19, 2008 at 2:16 pm

[re=203159]DeLand DeLakes[/re]: oh, yes, when he endorsed Obama, angry people wrote on the Colbert Nation page about how Colbert was not a true conservative and they wouldn’t watch anymore- he was a traitor, etc. But really you can’t be surprised at the stupidiy of the American public, can you?

dannygutters December 19, 2008 at 2:17 pm

[re=203164]problemwithcaring[/re]: I like when john legend walks in and says “do I smell a piano?”

p-Sludge December 19, 2008 at 2:18 pm

[re=203225]finallyhappy[/re]: Like some disappointed Spinal Tap fans and Wrestling people. Ok the Wrestling people are never disappointed. They’ll never get it.

sexytime December 19, 2008 at 2:22 pm

I like very much this weed it is nice.

brain meats December 19, 2008 at 2:37 pm

[re=203164]problemwithcaring[/re]: That is exactly what I was going to say/post/blurt

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e0N0oFQjshQ&eurl
I’ll stick that in my pipe and smoke it.

Gopherit December 19, 2008 at 2:38 pm

Willy has so much THC in his system I got a contact high from watching the youtube.

springfield_meltdown December 19, 2008 at 2:39 pm

[re=203225]finallyhappy[/re]: Perhaps they are faking being angry conservatives online and trying to be funny and failing miserably. I just can’t believe that there is anyone stupid enough to take Colbert’s act seriously.

DeLand DeLakes December 19, 2008 at 2:43 pm

[re=203225]finallyhappy[/re]: I thought that the only people who watched the Colbert Report were young, stoner guys (yes, Papa Bear, are you happy now?) and young women who are sexually enthralled by Steven. Interestingly, many of these young women that I know are also Asian. It’s “WASP fever”- young Asian ladies go nuts for a white conservative commentator with a Ching Chong Ding Dong alter ego.

groove December 19, 2008 at 2:45 pm

[re=203212]shortsshortsshorts[/re]:

AAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, win!

shortsshortsshorts December 19, 2008 at 2:45 pm

[re=203199]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Awesome, but no Christmas carol theme? MANCHU R U JUUISH ER SUMPTING?

lawrenceofthedesert December 19, 2008 at 2:58 pm

Willie looks a bit too much like Yassar Arafat for my taste; I guess that’s what drinking that biodiesel will do to you. His appearance really has gone downhill since he changed his name from Ricky.

brain meats December 19, 2008 at 3:08 pm

[re=203252]DeLand DeLakes[/re]: I am sexually enthralled by his repeated references to AD&D and multi-sided dice.

Call Me Stephen! Meet me on Porril with your Tenser’s Floating Disk, I’ll be the one with the Bag of Holding.

Unless you prefer to send a tell to Kreegous on Meneldor – your secret will be safely guarded! Or you’ll be power leveled. Or Both! wink wink wink

pattycake December 19, 2008 at 3:10 pm

[re=203225]finallyhappy[/re]: I was one of them, though. I figured I was part of the act.

DeLand DeLakes December 19, 2008 at 3:42 pm

[re=203315]brain meats[/re]: Uhhhhhh, if that is D & D speak, I will refer you to my boyfriend and his shoe-making gnome alter ego. It’s all just Greek to me.

dano December 19, 2008 at 3:43 pm

If you’re main concern these days is the legalization of weed then you fall into one of two categories.

1. You are upset because the guy in your dorm that used to sell it to you moved out.
2. You are Woody Harrelson .

brain meats December 19, 2008 at 3:48 pm

[re=203375]DeLand DeLakes[/re]: Check. DeLand is not Colbert on wonkette. I pine for his sword of smiting but I will uncover him like the mithril he is. Oh yes.

DNotApply December 19, 2008 at 3:57 pm

Willie looks like Yassir Arafat. I can’t believe no one else has mentioned it.

DeLand DeLakes December 19, 2008 at 4:22 pm

[re=203379]brain meats[/re]: Sword of smiting! NOW you’re speakin’ my language.

thetalltexan December 19, 2008 at 5:14 pm

Ah Willie Nelson. Smells a bit like ganja in person. His touch can heal.

Barrett808 December 19, 2008 at 7:11 pm

As others have noted before me, this completes Stephen Colbert’s transformation into J.R. “Bob” Dobbs: http://gallery.nofactzone.net/albums/userpics/AColbertChristmas_early.jpg

Deepthroat December 19, 2008 at 9:54 pm

[re=203212]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: thank you sir.

agitpropster December 20, 2008 at 4:11 am

Willie-mon? A righteous bwai but sometime he gwaan like a bloody bumbaclaat and he SUCK UP TO BABYLON. Seen?

nyphotog December 20, 2008 at 7:34 am

My kids love Colbert, but when we watched this I had some ‘splaining to do. Luckily, the nutmeg song went way over their heads.

Bruno December 20, 2008 at 12:07 pm

However, in Alaska weed is decriminalised and every baby momma granma (I think that’s right, those inbred relationships are hard to follow) has a meth or some other synthetic chemical lab in their garage/church/outhouse

PsycGirl December 20, 2008 at 2:02 pm

[re=203159]DeLand DeLakes[/re]: I guess that White House Press Correspondent’s dinner speech a few years ago was just a little too convincing.

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