Wonkette
By the Comics Curmudgeon
Hey, everybody, did you hear about what happened in Iraq this week? Obviously, I’m not talking about the carnage and the death, because the “surge” is “working” and the daily levels of terrible violence there have subsided to a point that is only a dozen times worse than anything any American civilian has ever experienced, instead of a million times worse. No, I’m talking about that Iraqi journalist who threw his shoes at our beloved lame duck president!
On the one hand, this event consisted of a literal Iraqi journalist hurling a physical pair shoes at our actual president; but, in another, less real sense, it was METAPHOR fraught with SYMBOLISM. And who is best at capturing that symbolism? Cartoonists! You know it! They created eighteen gazillion cartoons about this famous shoe-throwing; let’s see, like, five or six that are representative of the different trends.
Theme: Look, it’s George Bush under a huge pile of shoes!
Like all professional humorists, your political cartoonists know that more is more! For instance, our Iraqi journalist Muntadhar al-Zaidi only had two shoes to throw at the president; even if he had had more, probably he would have only been able to throw another four or five, tops, before being subdued by security. But … what if some person or persons, somehow, had been able to throw literally dozens of shoes at Bush, until they were stacked up around him in a huge shoe-pyramid? And they were of various sizes and styles? Wouldn’t that be hilarious? Ha ha! Shoes! Probably they smell bad!
Theme: We here in America, we would also like to hurl shoes at the president, because we don’t like him so much, these days!
If you believe some cartoonists, our commander-in-chief is not the most popular person to come down the pike, these days! Some of these communist terrorists think that Americans too would like to hurl footwear of some sort at George Bush, and are wont to depict them doing so. This cartoon at least has the imagination to have the targeted president standing somewhere other than behind a podium like the one where he dodged the shoes in real life — in fact, he’s in a venue where it actually seems more logical to have shoes thrown at him, or at least more logical than it did before a few days ago, when our world became even more of a surrealist joke than it already was.
Theme: Those tiny little shoes that George Bush ducked are no match for this huge enormous shoe that’s going to crush him like a bug!
Most of the cartoons of this type (and yes, they made up a huge subset of the Bush vs. Shoe cartoons) had the giant enormous shoe labelled as HISTORY or PUBLIC OPINION or some crap like that, but I have to give this cartoon credit for just showing us George Bush about to be crushed to death by a giant shoe-clad foot, for no reason, other than that it would be terrifying and awesome. The cartoonist is actually Israeli, so maybe this is the inscrutable foot of YHWH, whose motives are not to be discerned by mortal men.
Theme: We are all George W. Bush now, what with the shoes being hurled at us.
Remember how lots of Americans voted for George W. Bush because he was the kind of guy you could have a beer with, even though he was a recovering alcoholic who doesn’t actually drink beer? That’s because “have a beer with” isn’t meant literally; it’s a metaphor for being “relatable,” because he seems like the kind of guy who’d get into the same situations that you or I would! Like, for instance, life in America today, with the … let’s see … [squints at tiny type on shoes in cartoon] layoffs and credit crunch and big 3 and bankruptcy and fraud, often feels like you’re standing behind a podium, minding your own business, when all of the sudden a bunch of shoes are coming at you! Of course, all these shoes are George W. Bush’s fault. And that means he’s relatable, because that shoe that got thrown at him in Iraq was also his fault.
Theme: That Iraqi ingrate only had shoes to throw because of freedom. AMERICAN FREEDOM.
Did you know that under Saddam Hussein, Iraqis were not allowed to throw shoes at their president? Most of them didn’t even have shoes! Many didn’t even have feet. After America liberated them from this tyranny, that all changed. Now they can throw shoes at visiting heads of state all they want, whenever the mood strikes! And they only get a little bit beaten bloody and thrown in jail indefinitely for it. Huzzah for freedom!
Theme: Ha ha! Shoe … thing … throw?
Look! It’s a shoe … or a boot … W record? Thrown? Thing? With the thing? It means … something? Look, he’s throwing his shoe at him! But it’s a boot! Ha ha! Shoe! Throw! Oh, mercy.
“Life liberty and the right to chuck your shoes at a world leader without being
tortured for it later andshot (right away).”Serolf Divad: Iraqi freedom means the Secret Service doesn’t care enough to gun down the whole crowd.
Hell hath no fury like a shoe scorned!!!
Guppy06:
Fucking Secret Service pussies! Blackwater wouldn’t have left a soul standing, and would likely have stayed around afterward to collect ears and pry out any gold teeth they could find.
And Fratboy has no idea what the poor guy’s “beef” with him is. Fucktard.
Guppy06: The Secret Service guys wer just exercising the same right that Dubya gave to pharmacists — not to do their job if they found it morally objectionable.
It’s so charming how willfully ignorant Americans are about the banal terror of war. It’s almost like they haven’t had to fight a war on their own soil in over a century, or something!
Maybe Glenn McCoy is a nice guy and is good to his wife but he can eat a bowl of dicks as far as I’m concerned.
Doesn’t anyone care about the shoes’ opinion on these matters? Will someone please think of the shoes?
shortsshortsshorts: True empathy. Words of a fellow garment. You feel their pain no doubt. Like if it had been several pairs of shorts thrown instead, then what? Size ten?
Moi, I like the boot. More Texas style. More heel. More point.
I fucking hate Glen McCoy.
Darehead: It’s hard not to be empathetic towards any article of clothing, except pantspantspants. That fucker was banned. Fuck pants.
Packherd: You mean other than Pearl Harbor or the twin towers, yes?
Obviously, the cartoonists should be setting up a fund for that poor schmuck’s legal fees. Thanks to him, they didn’t have to think up a subject for a whole week. I miss Conrad, though, who would have had a shoe nailed to a crucifix.
shortsshortsshorts: P3 went down in the War against Paultards. Pure martydom. Ranks up there with Muntadhar al-Zaidi.
Good thing he didn’t have a weapon…the man shot off 2 shoes before he was tackled.
Guppy06: The Secret Service detail will be replaced by a Blackwater squad in future. Hell, they shoot Iraqis *before* they take off their shoes.
norbizness: Technically, that would be cannibalism.
norbizness: Yes, yes, Mr. McCoy is a noted dicketarian.
And Let he who is without sin cast the first shoe AHahaHAhahaha..uh..what?
I don’t get the whole “he would have been executed for throwing that shoe under Saddam” thing. I don’t think Saddam would have minded if someone had thrown a shoe at Bush.
Public Opinion:
Good thingToo bad he didn’t have a weapon…the man shot off 2 shoes before he was tackled.american mutt:
Right-wing comics are kinda the “Special Olympics” of comics. The point is less to be genuinely funny/fast, but rather just to show up and participate.
I don’t get the whole “he would have been executed for throwing that shoe under Saddam” thing. I don’t think Saddam would have minded if someone had thrown a shoe at Bush.
Hell, he probably would have given the guy a medal.
You know what I hope, Glenn McCoy? I hope that after the Americans are finally gone from Iraq the Iraqis go ahead and put up another statue of Saddam Hussein, right on the same spot. Mostly just because of how much it would piss flag waving retards like yourself off.
FMAZ!
After five years of war, the security situation has improved so much that a nutty reporter can get close enough to throw a shoe at the President of the Untied States, then have time enough to take off his other shoe and fling it, too. Henceforth, Helen Thomas will not be allowed to wear shoes around the White House.
Yahweh wears Florsheims?
When you shoe-t the President, you’re really shoe-ting America!
They’re gonna keep Helen Thomas barefoot and pregnant?
Maybe this will start a tradition during every “game” of public speaking by Bush.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Legend_of_the_Octopus
The Legend of the Octopus is a sports tradition during Detroit Red Wings home playoff games in which an octopus is thrown onto the ice surface for good luck.
I bet Shrubbie turns it into a solid Rockport endorsement deal; Cheney sure would.
He wasn’t throwing the shoe in anger.
A call came in for Bush on the shoe…
“When you shoe-t the President, you’re really shoe-ting America!”
Let’s all make tongue twisters:
The secret service shoe-ld have shooed the shoe-ter away before the Pre-shoe-dent was shoe-ted at by the Me-shoe-potainian shoe lobber. (a bit of LOL cat speak sorry)
In this “Shoes and Awe” story, is it true that the shoes were size 10?
WIDTAP asks Packherd if he means “… other than Pearl Harbor or the Twin Towers ..?
Oh, I get it!
The “Pearl Harbor” or the “Twin Towers” also known, respectively, as the Roosevelt and Cli’ton “legacies.”
That, “Pearl Harbor” and those, “Twin Towers?”
Brian Richard Allen
Los Angeles - CalifUBAMAcated 90028 — & the Far Abroad