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Yeah that's a good one, Rick, now back the fuck off Rick Warren is a big shot evangelical preacher at a 600-trillion-person church in Southern California, meaning he’s also the puppetmaster behind American politics. You may remember his “Saddleback Forum” over the summer when he forced Obama and McCain — both of whose personal cell numbers he keeps — to babble about Jesus in his church, individually, while the other was being molested by rabid frogs in a Cone of Silence. Well guess what people, he’s now invited himself to give the wingnut invocation at Obama’s inauguration melee. This news does not please America’s many homosexuals.

Much like Mormons and black people, Rick Warren did not want the queers to get married in California. He publicly supported Prop 8 and, when it passed, the Gay Militia protested the crap out of his church. More recently, he gave an interview to the editor of Beliefnet. Much bullshit was spewed:

“They can’t accuse me of homophobia,” says Rick Warren, the celebrity preacher and icon of the “new” or “broader agenda” evangelicals, in a new interview with Beliefnet editor Steven Waldman. Pastor Rick protests that he’s not a homophobe because he’s given money to people with AIDS. He has gay friends and has even eaten dinner in “gay homes.”

[…]

Warren dodged Waldman’s question about whether he supported civil unions or domestic partnerships, answering instead, “I support full equal rights for everyone in America,” adding that he only opposes a “redefinition” of marriage. He went on to say he’s opposed to gay marriage the same way he is opposed to a brother and sister marrying (that would be incest), a man marrying a child (that would be statutory rape), or someone having multiple spouses (that would be polygamy). Pressed by Waldman, Warren said he considered those crimes equivalent to gay marriage.

And the mindfuck to end all mindfucks:

Warren claimed he supported Proposition 8 because of a free-speech issue — asserting that “any pastor could be considered doing hate speech . . . if he shared his views that homosexuality wasn’t the most natural way for relationships.”

Well we’re just silly folk at Wonkette, but we imagine that Rick Warren “could be considered doing hate speech” regardless of gay marriage’s legality!

At least we’ll now have a sizable chunk of angry gay protesters at Obama’s inauguration, which will add some humor to an otherwise catastrophic event.

Pro-Life Rick Warren to Give Invocation at Obama Inauguration [Brody File]
Rick Warren Doth Protest Too Much: I’m Not A Homophobe [TAPPED]

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  • Meaux

    Jim, did you seriously use “irregardless”? This news must have you truly unhinged.

  • Jim Newell

    [re=201437]Meaux[/re]: Damn you for catching a bad habit. Now I am going to change it and no one will know.

  • Hopey dont play that game

    There is a consensus of opinion that Rick Warren is a douchenozzle. Yea, I love grammatical error day at Wonkette.

  • marioninnyc

    It looks like Barry’s trying to dodge Rick’s morning mouth or drunk breath or whatever. I only logged in to complain about the 40foot tall Campbell Brown ads. Please make her go away!

  • assistant/atlas
  • azw88

    He made this call to make people believe that he is not a muslin and to get people to stop having massive protests in Georgia against Rev Wright.

    This guy is the antithesis of Wright and Islam, except Islam hates teh fags too and Wright preaches at a huge fucking church like Warren does. So, they are different and yet the same.

  • shanemcgowan

    I think that there should be a green Mitch McConnell at the Inauguration. And Obama should ride up the Capitol steps shirtless on the back of a unicorn. And Campbell Brown should be dressed like the SWIM girl.

  • Jim Newell

    [re=201446]marioninnyc[/re]: I believe this is the last day of monster Campbell. You’re going to miss her, but you don’t know that yet.

  • Iggy Plop

    Fuck him fuck him fuck him. And fuck Obama too while we’re at it. I guess Barry expended all available cojones on the election, and now he’s going to be a gutless water carrier for the neurotic insecurities of the lumpen masses in all their overfed, indebted, arrogant and ignorant glory? Bill Clinton wasn’t afraid to stand up for the gays.

    O.K., so this pisses me off.

  • Cape Clod

    That’s an awesome five o’clock shadow the right reverend is sportin’.

  • shortsshortsshorts

    The best thing for these Pro-h8ters to do is stop talking. The more they talk, the more they sound like bigots. I hate to be giving advice to these scum, but they may want to keep that in mind.

    Oh and Rick Warren is probably gay. The end.

  • scotack

    If you scroll the comment box up and down really fast across CB’s face,
    among other things that happen, she appears to get bigger, if only fleetingly.

  • Kev-O-Tron

    This really does piss me off and I will be at the catastrophic event making that sentiment known. Seriously, fuck these fundamentalists. I’d like to put them all in camps and make them watch gay porn for the rest of their lives.

  • shortsshortsshorts

    [re=201450]Jim Newell[/re]: “You’re going to miss her, but you don’t know that yet.”

    The only way I’ll miss Campbell is if I go to “Wonkette.com” tomorrow morning and their is in fact no “Wonkette.com.” If I have to start paying your fucking bills, I’ll do it, but if you ever shut down— I know where you live, Newell, and I’m pretty sure I can find Ken in Mojave. (P.S.: When I find you I will give you cookies and cold, hard cash.)

  • DeLand DeLakes

    [re=201451]Iggy Plop[/re]: Not to excuse Barry for letting this gasbag crash the inauguration, but Clinton didn’t do such a hot job for teh gays. He supported Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell and signed into law the Defense of Marriage Act. Bill was wanting in the testicular area himself on this particular issue.

  • chascates

    [re=201450]Jim Newell[/re]: PLEASE! No Lou Dobbs!

  • quoth teh Raven

    [re=201451]Iggy Plop[/re]: What an eloquent expression of vitriol. I logged on to spew my own, and now I don’t have to. ( oh, and to cover CB’s face with the comment box)

    Equally pissed off…

  • Texan Bulldoggette

    [re=201464]chascates[/re]: Or Jack Cafferty (as much as I like that irascible fella, he ain’t much to look at, esp. really BIG!)

  • randomsausage

    [re=201464]chascates[/re]: Lou Dobbs: No Hair. No Mezzicans.

  • 2druk2phluq

    I know what would be good. Let’s campaign like hell for a man who claims to have a bunch of left wing beliefs. During said campaign we could all watch as those left wing beliefs morphed into their true form, barely left of center in some cases, and barely right of center in others. Many people could say it was unfair to judge the candidate, because he did make claims of running a post-partisan government if he were elected. Here’s the big, big, big problem. That would make the early campaign a huge fucking lie. Sound familiar? It fits Obama pretty well also.

    Welcome to the post democratic United States. Our “representatives” know what’s best for us, so they don’t listen to the people. Our presidents do what they think is right, and they don’t listen to the people. The judicial system is now a quantity control device for the prison industry, and to them people are just a commodity with a price tag.

    Fuck ’em.

  • joezoo

    Is Father Guido Sarducci available?

  • Iggy Plop

    [re=201463]DeLand DeLakes[/re]: What people forget about “Don’t ask don’t tell” is that it was a compromise solution reached by Congress after the massive firestorm unleashed by Clinton’s initial decision to issue a blanket executive order to allow gays to serve. He wanted to do the right thing, but the party – and the public and the media – balked.

  • WadISay

    Just out of curiosity, does Obama intend to “dance with the one that brung him” at the inaugural ball?

  • SayItWithWookies

    [re=201463]DeLand DeLakes[/re]: I guess you don’t remember what the policy was before DADT. It was sorta like “If we even hear a rumor that you’re gay, you get a free dishonorable discharge.” DADT was one of Clinton’s first acts as president, and he got a world of shit for it.

    That said, Warren is a sanctimonious, self-aggrandizing, falsely-pious, judgmental pedagogue who caters to the prejudices of his bloated, childlike parishioners and hides his overblown ego behind a cloak of pretend humility. That and I’d put money on him diddling little boys.

  • tunamelt

    Oh, hell no. I helped organize one of the Prop 8 protests at this guy’s church and I’m pretty sure I… oh, hell no.

  • magic titty

    Is his eating in “gay home” the equivalent of O’Reilly having dinner in Harlem (where the blacks have been known to eat)?

  • tunamelt

    [re=201462]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: Guys, you should be scared. Just… fyi.

  • robanybody

    Rick protesteth too much, as so many of these Godly Mouthpiece types do. I predict within three years his cathedral will be renamed “Brokeback Church,” his wife will be shunning interviews and counting settlement cash, and Rick will be in gay-reversal therapy that absolutely doesn’t take. Remember, you heard it here first, unless you heard it somewhere else, or you’re his male “personal assistant,” in which case you probably already knew.

  • tiger

    Sincerely sickening. Oh Barry, you have gone and DONE it now. An anti-gay preacher? Some suburban mega-slob? You kneel before this sack of fat, white shit??
    I thought I’d be watching the inaguration. Now I know i’m not.The last six months were possibly one of the few and most likely the last time i will ever, ever participate in the blood-sport politic.
    Hey, Slowbama, FUCK YOU.

  • Iggy Plop

    [re=201477]Iggy Plop[/re]: I realized that my comments here and the last post reveal that actually remember the Clinton inauguration and first few months. I’m stunned that I’m that old.

  • DeLand DeLakes

    [re=201480]SayItWithWookies[/re]: You and Iggy Plop are both right about the intricacies of pre-Don’t Ask Don’t Tell policy, but signing DOMA into law is the real heap of shit that Clinton left for the nation’s queerbags. DOMA is part of what makes the current enshrining of discrimination in state constitutions possible. It’s also probably unconstitutional, as the articles include a clause which rules that all states must recognize the legal decisions made in other states, like marriage.

  • Advocatus_Diaboli

    Rick Warren bathroom goblin scandal in 5 … 4 … 3 ….

  • tunamelt

    [re=201499]Advocatus_Diaboli[/re]: There needs to be some kind of undercover gay superhero person who unmasks people like him.

  • Mr Blifil

    Wasn’t Warren complicit in McCain’s late arrival at the “forum” where he may have been listening to Obama’s segment on the radio in the car on the way to the venue?

    Plus, that’s more than a hint of mint you got going on there, Pastor Warren. Nobody’s fooled, buddy, nobody…

  • Neon Trotsky

    There once was a Senator from Chicago,
    Who escaped the reach of Governor Blago.
    But if guilt-by-association is fair,
    Then the gotcha media has him in a snare,
    And Barry’s just a commie like Ivan Drago!

  • p-Sludge

    “straight homes” wanna make it with cars and trucks. If your home wants ta hump OTHER homes? You got yerself a “gay home”, there son.

  • Neon Trotsky

    [re=201504]Neon Trotsky[/re]: Nooooo! I meant this for the poetry entry. For this I would have to find a rhyme for “Evangelical” and “hobbit”…

  • WIDTAP

    [re=201490]tunamelt[/re]: I’m not scared. I gotz the mad web blocker skilz. I’z totally pwn 60-ft tall Campbell “Heck-of-an-advert” Brown.

  • Kev-O-Tron

    mad mad mad. That is the only way I can summarize my feelings. I supported this fucker to the END and have lost a few friends over this prop 8 shit. I’ve nearly gone to blows with some “progressives” in my neighborhood over this. I got a fucking plane ticket to DC for his shindig knowing full well it was going to be a logistical nightmare and this is the thanks I get?

    I have a few things to talk about over at change.gov – see you guys later.

  • Dawn Keipuntsh

    [re=201476]joezoo[/re]: Contact Lazlo Toth, American. He’ll know how to get in touch with him.

  • Iggy Plop

    [re=201498]DeLand DeLakes[/re]: touche – I had repressed that act of bad faith.

  • SayItWithWookies

    [re=201498]DeLand DeLakes[/re]: You’re right about the Defense of Marriage Act — pure BS political calculation.

  • Arfer

    Surlry, you jest. If that Millionaire TeeVee Charlatan Fuckface is given free time at the Enauguration of Our President of the United States, I’ll shred the fucking teeshirts that mark my donations to the Obama Campaign. If this true…my heart is broken.

  • DeLand DeLakes

    [re=201516]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Barry sez he wants to repeal DOMA. If he makes good on that promise, well, I guess I don’t really care if he invited some evangelical assflap to handle snakes at his inauguration party, or whatever.
    http://www.salon.com/opinion/greenwald/2008/11/06/doma/

  • rev_matt_y

    It’s an ad. BFD. It keep the Wonketteers employed and is fairly innocuous visually (e.g. it doesn’t flash/blink/expand over the page/etc etc) so it doesn’t bother me at all. Stupid tag line, though.

  • Kev-O-Tron

    [re=201511]Dawn Keipuntsh[/re]: ahh… one of my distant relatives. Oops! Did I just out myself on the tubes?

  • bitchincamaro

    Pastor Rick should do the world a solid and volunteer to shut down his Jeebus=$$$ machine for 30 days, starting Friday. No matter his opinion on teh gay, he’s the enemy. Stay the fuck away from Hopey, fuckface.

  • SayItWithWookies

    [re=201521]DeLand DeLakes[/re]: That would be awesome. I still stand behind everything I said about Rick Warren though.

  • tunamelt

    [re=201521]DeLand DeLakes[/re]: Yeah if this is a symbolic gesture, fine, whatever, as long as his actual actions are different…

  • BadMFer

    How soon until Warren get’s caught sucking some homeless guy’s dick in a city park?

  • robanybody

    B-sein promised us he would bridge the old lines of division and contempt. That’s what he’s doing. So he wasn’t lying. I still have faith he’s on our side, not theirs, and that most of his legislation will reflect that. If it turns out he’s a sell-out of the Trogs, I will be one disillusioned SOB. But showing them and theirs respect doesn’t seem quite the same as selling-out to them, even chameleon stinkpots like Warren. I’ll wait until he’s actually President and betraying our side before I write him off.

  • independentthinkerdude

    As someone who has been totally gay for Barry throughout the campaign, this is like finding my one true love was only interested in fucking me on November 4th and is now just not ready for a relationship. Fuck.

    And I don’t understand why religious types have it in for gay marriage when God is so obviously bi.

  • randomsausage

    HAHAHAHAHA. Half breed muslins no like the gayz

  • Borat

    I could really use a gay dinner in a gay homestead. But the name Saddleback really scares me.

  • Vewol Mevemont

    [re=201464]chascates[/re]: Sweet Jesus — not Lou Dobbs. I will watch Campbell Brown a million times if she can free this world from Lou fucking Dobbs.

    Do you hear that Campbell? Get rid of Lou Dobbs, and everyone will love you and your giant ads forever and ever and ever.

  • wheelie

    [re=201451]Iggy Plop[/re]: Good man. You know, I’ve eaten at some Christian houses, but I’d never agree to them marrying. I’m afraid that their children would turn out Christian. I’ve noticed that the Christian agenda is being pushed a lot these days in teevee and magazines and I’m worried that decent, fair homosexuals might catch Christianity and be led astray in wicked values of hate and ignorance.

    [re=201437]Meaux[/re]: In my country, we use ‘irregardless’ as a humorous idiom. It’s understood that it’s irregular and contradictory, so I frown on its detractors. *frown, frown*

  • badmuthagoose

    I’ve got to say, this is the first thing Obama has done that has TRULY pissed me off. Wow. WTF? There are SUCH better people he could have chosen for this. Gah.

  • DemmeFatale

    Why do I feel like I was just dumped by my boyfriend?

  • smashtheduck

    [re=201480]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Um except I was kicked out, albeit with an honorable, for a rumor.

    Also, seriously Barry? You couldn’t even wait till your swearing in to become a fucking douche bag? Or is it just douche-fucker?

    Fuck.

  • mattym

    This is exactly why we homos supported Hillary in the Primaries.

    She is much more of a friend to the gay.

    I predict little help from Obama on gay rights during his term. Already we’ve heard that DADT will be pushed back ‘a few years’ until Obama has fixed this whole economy mess.

  • smashtheduck

    Jim? So is it too much to ask for giant Rachel to replace Campbell? Kthxbai

  • tunamelt

    [re=201572]smashtheduck[/re]: So I can get fired for licking my computer screen?

  • Raumfahrer

    Awwwwwww hell no. Fuck Rick Warren. This has fuck all to do with inclusion, and everything to do with slapping homo supporters in the face. We dealt with fucking christofascism running everything for eight long years — I, for one, was greatly looking forward to these douchetards having the door slammed in their faces. Until they actually read and understand the Constitution, fuck em all, I don’t care for their opinion.

  • smashtheduck

    [re=201573]tunamelt[/re]: Why not? Sounds better than “laid off”. Plus, think of how much fun you’d have explaining it during an interview. Oh nevermind, no one’s fucking hiring anyway. K, bad idea but at least I wouldn’t be having nightmares of those beady eyes.

  • Darehead

    The ONE person to unite the nation = Rod Blagojevich. Waterboarded.
    The ONE person to unite Wonkette = Lewd Obbs. Guillotined.
    The ONE person to unite the World = George Bush. Shoe-stomped.

  • InKnockYouUs

    Rick Warren is ugly and white and fat. I am against him for that alone. But once I had the bad fortune to skim through Rick Warren’s *book*. It was stupid beyond belief. It was about how God has a plan for you, and no matter what you do it is God’s plan, and that should somehow make you feel all warm and fuzzy. This guy is the intellectual equivalent of McDonalds–crapola.

  • Scandalabra

    My blood is boiling and I just fired off an angry screed to change.gov (not that it will do one whit of good). Next time Rick Warren/sack of christian bigot shit/phony Tammy Faye wannabe with a “liberal” slant dines in my gay home, she’s gonna get a shit sandwich and a stiletto heal through her forehead. Asshole.

    Barry! 50 pushups and endless laps, tool.

  • coolcatdaddy

    I just wrote to change.gov to let them know I’m changing my party affiliation to Independent on Inauguration Day.

    I’m not changing it back until I see some real CHANGE for lgbts from the Democratic Party. Period.

  • coolcatdaddy

    [re=201581]InKnockYouUs[/re]: I think his God’s Plan also includes sending Rev. Warren money.

  • nrkeyqueer@gmail.com

    Ummmm….minority (heh) opinion here, but I’m gonna wait until the man is actually in office a few hours before I make catagorical condemnations of his entire presidency

    This is how it works people. You work your ass off to get your guy elected. Then you work twice as hard and four times as long to keep him honest while hes in there.

  • DemmeFatale

    [re=201596]nrkeyqueer@gmail.com[/re]: Are you always this condescending?

  • finallyhappy

    Aretha comes on after that putz Warren- think she can smack him off the stage?

  • smashtheduck

    [re=201596]nrkeyqueer@gmail.com[/re]: Or we can drink, bitch, and call him a douche some more. Yeah, I’m going with that.

  • wheelie

    [re=201596]nrkeyqueer@gmail.com[/re]: Are you serious?

    Folk ’round here don’t take kindly to serious. Go make yer points elsewhere, point-maker.

  • FreshCliches

    When either Richard Dawkins or Michael Shermer delivers the invocation, that’ll be change I can believe in.

  • Lord Foppington of Dandyshire

    O it’s okay, we gays are used to getting the shaft.

    *rimshot*

    P.S.– I’m not happy with Barry at the moment.

  • jetjaguar

    What the fuck Barry? Would you let a known racist do it to?

    Come on man, you know better then this.

  • Servo

    [re=201476]joezoo[/re]:
    Capital! They can both have a cigarette, too.

  • DP

    So Jeramiah Wright wasn’t available? On the strictly superficial front, doesn’t this Rick Warren person look just like Morey the wig salesman from Goodfellas? “Morey’s Wigs! They won’t come off!!”

  • jetjaguar

    No no, nrkeyqueer is right, we should wait until AFTER the fuckups and hypocrisy before pointing out the obvious, impending fuckups and hypocrisy.

  • SayItWithWookies

    [re=201568]smashtheduck[/re]: Well the Ninth Circuit Court says you can sue the military — they’re the ones who violated their policy. I suppose they counted on you not wanting to sue.
    http://www.heraldnet.com/article/20081205/NEWS03/712059828

  • Ilikepigeons

    does rick warren play basketball?

  • SayItWithWookies

    [re=201606]FreshCliches[/re]: Oh, that would be awesome. Or PZ Meyers or The Amazing Randi, who could do magic tricks while giving it.

  • Servo

    [re=201611]DP[/re]:
    Can we get DeNiro to choke him with a phone cord?

  • PJ

    Rick Warren was not chosen for his message. He was chosen for his size and projectile stopping power.

    The entire Obama family is safe behind this guy, and no one will miss him if anything untoward happens.

    It’s a smart move, given how slow the Secret Service was on the uptake earlier this week.

  • Custerwolf

    [re=201451]Iggy Plop[/re]: This MORE than pisses me off – it godamn SHITS me, man. It shits me all over the place. Fuck Rick Warren and the whores he rode in on.

  • wickedlittledoll

    Maybe it’s a decoy in case of a shoe attack…
    http://democralypsenow.blogspot.com/

  • aleks

    [re=201451]Iggy Plop[/re]: To the gays, Iggy. Bill Clinton stood up to the gays. Profile in Clinton Courage #1.

  • fishandvodka

    F u Barry, you weak peace of shiiite, like the rest of the spineless Dems. If you think you will make these people like you, you will not. They will still support one of their own during the next election, as well as when they are attacking you. But when you acknowledge them, appease them, you just showing them who has true power – them, because despite their hateful views, you give them their podium.

    Maybe Nader was right – there is no difference. Would things look any different if Jamaccain got elected?

  • shortsshortsshorts

    [re=201636]fishandvodka[/re]: I know the temptation to listen to Nader is real, but do yourself a favor and put a DO NOT WANT sign on those thoughts. Nader is more of a panderer then Barry will ever be.
    Say that to yourself and drink 5 shots of Muslim Barry Juice.

  • shortsshortsshorts

    Oh yes. And on January 20th the entire world will be Rick-rolled.
    Huzzah.

  • Custerwolf

    [re=201626]PJ[/re]: Well that makes me feel a little better…..

  • Custerwolf

    “Invocation?” Isn’t that the term used to describe folks who’s vocation is a complete fucking made-up joke?

  • Yoshi

    [re=201618]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Oh, to have PZ Meyers would be fantastic!

    This Rick Warren pick is such a slap in the face. I can only hope that someone over there registers the fact that it was a totally dick move on his part.

    And, I hate to say it, but I’m going to miss GIANT CAMPBELL BROWN tomorrow. She provided so many hours of entertainment! Bye, Campbell!! KIT, ‘k???

  • Yoshi

    [re=201648]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: OH EM GEE —– if Hopey’s just setting us up for a huge Rick Roll, I will totally forgive him completely and forever. Squee!

  • robanybody

    I’m willing to give Barry a full fifteen minutes after the inauguration to prove himself. If he can’t make real change I can believe in by then, he might as well pull on some Tony Lamas, start saying ‘nucular,’ and buy himself a fake ranch, because he’s Shrub II in my book. G’dammit to hell anyhow.

    As for big Campbell, two words: finger puppet.

  • rubybuckaroo

    Maybe we can influence the folks at the inauguration to turn their backs when the rev. gives his invocation?

  • Scandalabra

    Or maybe a great big rainbow “Invoke this, bitch!”

  • robanybody

    I’m not kidding about Campbell. Print two of her, cut them out, staple the sides together, and make her do, um, tricks. I haven’t had this much fun since the trailer repair job outside Vegas.

  • Yoshi

    Hmm, a commenter over at Pharyngula copied this off of a salon.com article:

    “This time, though, the decision to get involved with Saddleback was actually not Obama’s. The Joint Congressional Committee on Inaugural Ceremonies, run by the House and Senate, put together the program for the swearing-in ceremony. Congress, not Obama, invited Warren (as well as scheduling a musical performance by Aretha Franklin; here’s hoping she doesn’t reprise the 2005 inaugural performance of John Ashcroft’s “Let the Eagle Soar”).”

    But wouldn’t he have any say in the matter? wtf.

  • One Yield Regular

    Could someone please name for me ONE semi-well-known genuinely decent religious figure in this country right now, one who wouldn’t be picked simply as a bone tossed to whatever “bloc o’voters” they might represent? I’m having trouble coming up with even a compromise. But damn – there has GOT to be someone more Yes We Can than this self-aggrandizing pedantic showman to lead this obligatory (not!) invocation. Cecil Williams? Pernessa Seele? Somebody? Anybody?

  • Custerwolf

    Okay – so first I have to listen to the insanely bloated-with-Jesus Rick Warren preach to all of us abortion-luvin sodomites, then next up is Urethra Franklin? I’m sure she’ll be sporting half a fur farm as per usual in a vain attempt to cover her acreage.

  • HuskyMescan

    keep your enemies closer doesn’t mean get your taint tickled by the goatied jesus fatty, for fucks sake.

  • HuskyMescan

    Well Wonkette, you’ve done it. Now I lust for Campbell Brown. Lotion Check. Cumrag Check, Weeknights at 8pm.

  • organiccoffee

    Hey, why does everyone assume that during invocation, this guy is going to be pushing his screed? It’s Barry’s ceremony, not a church pulpit.

    My guess is that Barry makes him waddle out and de facto apologize on behalf of wingnuts.

  • robanybody

    If it was Hopey’s choice, consider that Rick’s folks get all worked up about flag burning and whether they’ll have to get divorced if gays get married and who’s wearing their flag pins. In other words, mentally speaking, they tend to be one Jesus short of a creche. So you march out the Rev. Bass Akwards and let him pray the witches out of a few people, and the trolls are happy for two years and don’t screw with you so much when you try to save the world from global warming. Maybe it’s smart politics to let the Rev. Clown Shoes babble for three minutes. Cynical perhaps, crass, empty pandering maybe, but probably more effective than wrestling to a stalemate all the time and getting forced to swear under oath what “is” is.

    At least that’s my hope fantasy.

  • fishandvodka

    [re=201684]robanybody[/re]: [re=201682]organiccoffee[/re]: Have you guys met a wingnut lately? These people are not the kind to play somebody else’s tune. They just see this as an opportunity to speak the word of god to the infidels, which is their dream all along.

    While at it, why not we just wear burkas and pray to Allah five times a day – maybe Osama will like us then as well. These people are irrational; you can’t please them by being inclusive – you are either with them or against them.

  • TexasCowGirl

    I don’t like Pastor Warren, but I’m not surprised. I was actually listening to what Barry said during the campaign. He said he would bring in and dialogue with people of all views. I also heard him say he did not support gay marriage either. It’s not Barry’s fault that some people weren’t listening to him. Hell, 70% of black folks in California voted for Prop 8 so I guess he can’t invite black people from California either. I never read “change” as meaning replacing a rightwing idealogical Borg with a leftwing idealogical Borg. That would suck too.

  • robanybody

    [re=201678]HuskyMescan[/re]: Heh heh, you said lust.

  • Arfer

    The scales have fallen from my eyes…I voted for a shithead.

  • jagorev

    Hmm, gee, I wonder whose VOTES the President-elect is more anxious to win in 2012, the GAYS or the EVANGELICALS. Tough decision, innit?

  • Arfer

    Why not the Harvard chaplain or the dean of the national cathedral or the baptist bishop of Illinois instead of this Millionaire Media Mogul defiler of all that is American. These vermin should be ignored off the air for their lies and corruption. Barack will kiss the devil’s ass to include the assholes in . This is one asshole he can include out.

  • southernfried

    I am a Christian and I hate those conservative evangelical fucktards with a heat of a thousand suns because they institutionalize the dumbest aspects of white trash culture and claim it as “God’s way” that has something to do with the Bible, which they’ve never read in its entirety, but only to cherry pick now less than half-dozen “teh geh is bad” passages that are all so fired important since they lost their godless Communist Satan figures — important for fundraising! — the the end of the cold war. And they make people think I suck hard, which I may, but not for my religion, which isn’t the epic fail these shits have made it seem to be.

    And, yeah, I’m a potty-mouth with a bad temper who writes run-on sentences AND a Christian, you bet your ass. I don’t follow some limp-dicked, pasty-faced little stained glass savior, I roll with the Fightin’ Jesus, the one who drove out of the temple with a whip the profiteers and fakes who ran their scams within its walls. Bite me if you can’t deal with it, shitwit. But I digress.

    You want someone with some credibility giving an invocation, I got one for you: Katharine Jefferts Schori, Presiding Bishop of the Episcopal Church. She’s a girl, a scientist who believes in evolution, and someone who thinks teh gehz are just fine. That is a piss-off-the-fundies trifecta. You want to sprinkle a little God over the proceedings, get a decent shaker. She’s the shizz. And, yeah, I’m saying “shizz” ironically.

  • jagorev

    [re=201693]Arfer[/re]: So you honestly thought Barry would never take advantage of an easy, costless opportunity to gain lots of positive reviews from America’s huge evangelical community? Yeah, I’m not sure Barry is the shithead here.

    You people sicken me with your complete and utter lack of understanding of the distinction between meaningless symbolism and actual, you know, policy. Gawd. Remember when Bush lulled all the “Reagan Democrats” into a sense of security with his “compassionate conversation” schtick? This is like that, but reversed (in this case, Barry will be using Pastor Rick as cover for his homogay abortionist Muslin communiss agenda, so please relax)

  • robanybody

    [re=201689]fishandvodka[/re]: Most of the wingnuts I know are fairly clueless, desperate to be fed answers to ease the terror of being, and easily led. I think having Warren on the stage on Inauguration Day might leave a lot of these people thinking, duh, maybe he isn’t a muslin, maybe if Rick likes him enough to be on stage with him then I shouldn’t hate him quite yet.

    You might know a sharper class of wingnut. I don’t give the average fundie all that much credit. Their leaders, yes, such as Ralph Opie Reed and the like. They’re devious and able to scheme and steal from Indians and such. But the average wingnut? Tell them you follow Jesus and you can get them to support elective war, environmental ruin and a full monty assault on the Constitution–and make them believe this is patriotism. So maybe with the right urging they’ll consider supporting peace, clean air and a return to the rule of law. It’s worth a try, anyway.

  • SayItWithWookies

    [re=201669]Yoshi[/re]: But wait — everyone’s already got their torches and pitchforks out.
    Maybe Barry doesn’t have a say in it. It’s like a wedding — half of it’s what the bride wants and half of it’s what the bride’s mother wanted her wedding to be.

  • jetjaguar

    [re=201671]One Yield Regular[/re]: Mr. Rogers died years ago…

  • blogtard A

    This is the funniest blog community bar none. I haven’t laughed this goddamn hard since the O man told douche boy Rick that questions on abortion were above his pay grade.

  • CuntryFirst

    What, did Rick Warren whip out his fat, stubby cock at Brokeback ranch, and Barry start stroking that oversized clit until Rick’s flabby thighs started to quake, then Barry whipped out his and Warren wrapped his fat, greasy lips around Barry’s, and then they started to 69 each other, then McCain joined in (with the smallest cock of all) and started ramming Rick, and then after each one of them came, Barry and John, with that glow on their faces, pledged to Rick that, yes, if either of them won the Presidency they’d let Rick perform the invocation? Is that what happened?

  • Harmless

    Hey gays! Where have I heard this guilt by association thing concerning Obama and a pastor before? Ah yes, in the primaries, when Hillary and Hannity were questioning him on his associations with his real pastor, Jeremiah Wright. Before you go all self-righteous here, maybe you want to think about whether you stuck up for ol’ NOBAMA back then, when his pro-gay marriage pastor was being kicked around and used as a cheap political weapon against him, and think about who might have been giving his invocation had Hills not made his pastor an issue.

  • jetjaguar

    I wonder what CAMPBELL BROWN thinks about all of this?

  • DemmeFatale

    [re=201698]jagorev[/re]: I’m so sorry that you’re sick. See, I wish this was meaningless symbolism, but here in California, it IS policy. It kind of pisses us off. We’re sensitive that way

  • MayorMcCheese

    i mean, it’s great that Hope-a-lot is being inclusive. but i wanted him to be inclusive to people i like, ya know? might as well give al-Qaeda a keynote address.

  • jagorev

    [re=201736]DemmeFatale[/re]: It’s going to be like this for the next four years, isn’t it? Every goddamn week, the “netroots” will be whining and bitching about some new damn thing, like an invocation which has nothing to do with the way he will govern or his policies. No matter what Obama actually ACCOMPLISHES in the way of progressive and liberal policies, some of you people will insist he’s “selling out”.

    NOTE: Obama is your President, not your favorite rock band, and not your new bicycle. It would help if you began to judge the man on his politics and his leadership rather than the surface symbolism of things.

    THIS IS WHY WE CAN’T HAVE NICE THINGS.

  • jagorev

    Memo to the Netroots:

    Stop acting like a bunch of hysterical teenage girls. Yes, it was helpful when you were all hysterical about your new pretend boyfriend during the campaign, but now it really doesn’t help anything if you start cutting yourself and threatening suicide the minute he pays any attention to another chick (evangelicals). Besides, everyone knows Rick Warren is a total slut, and there’s no way your man Barry will do anything more than fingerbang him. It doesn’t mean anything, baby, you’re still the one he really loves.

  • HuskyMescan

    [re=201722]CuntryFirst[/re]: man, i bet that place smelled like porkrhines, ass, and O’s magical lavender aroma.

  • Bearbloke

    [re=201502]tunamelt[/re]: Note from another Wonketteer who’s (too) old enough to remember the early 90’s, regarding “some kind of undercover gay superhero person who unmasks people like him”. During the Bush Sr. years, ACT-UP and other groups were engaging in the new (to them) media exercise of “Outing” public figures, especially if that person was somehow supporting or creating oppression of teh ghayz. It was a big controversy (in the small pond of “Respectable, Mainstream” gay politics), and the gay inteligensia found itself on both sidies of the issue. However, teh Interwebs changes everything, and the formerly raging [flaming?] controversy has simple become Standard Operational Procedure – isn’t that so, Gov. Crist?

    All that said, I think That One’s screwed the pooch this time – being “bipartisan” is one thing, but poking your supporters in the eye is waythehell another…

  • Dorje Drolo

    Great. Black versus gay riots at the inauguration.

    Way to hang separately instead of hanging together, Democrats!

  • JSDC007

    So a douchier, fatter version of Kid Rock will be giving the invocation speech.

    What the hell is an invocation speech, and why do we have some fatty hambone cult leader speechifying in front of millions of very cold people on the national mall?

    Well, maybe god will cry tears of joy or something. Which means it will rain buckets and Kid Rock Warren will look like a wet Yeti. And we’ll all laugh.

  • DemmeFatale

    [re=201754]jagorev[/re]: As the mother of two hysterical teenage girls, I can tell you that they know A LOT about whining and bitching! They also voted NO on Prop. 8.

    The knot in my stomach tells me that Obama has made a big mistake.

  • shortsshortsshorts

    My city should be getting you dumb gays motivated. This is ridiculous. You have a bunch of I AM SO ANGRIES people who wont leave the house or do something about it.
    DISCLAIMER: If the gayz don’t go outside my sacred relationship will be protected by the Saddleback Church.

  • Steeevyo

    lulz

    teh hardcore libruls voted for Obama and nao say he is epic fail.

  • Aurelio

    [re=201701]robanybody[/re]: Good post, but I think there is a right-wing individualism embedded in American protestantism. If so, they can never be won over to the left.

    Just sayin’.

  • PulledPorkBarrel

    So let’s crucify Obama now? Before the man has even taken office? Because the person giving (one of the) speeches at his inauguration was against prop 8? In case you people haven’t realized, the majority of the country still is against gay marriage. It might not be right or fair but are you just going to impose a literal blackout/boycott of every single person who holds a misguided/bigoted view? That’s a real progressive way to get things done.
    Our economy is in the shits and people across the world are applauding a guy who was throwing shoes at our (lame duck fuckfaced) head of state. I’d say there are bigger fish to fry than gay rights at the moment. Sorry. It hurts and it’s unfair, but our 401(k)s and um ownership of our homes, survival of our economy as a whole, energy independence, how the entire middle east views us – to me that’s more important. Obama is the most level-headed intelligent task-man for these problems so hold you noese while rick warren speaks. What do you want from Obama anyways? You’re all pissy at him now, do you want him gone? Would it have been better for Palin/Plumber to have been elected, so we could all sit here and moan like persecuted liberals (as the last 8 years have been)? There’s a small window now for our president-elect to confront a number of hugely important issues that will affect our country’s well-being and survival for the next couple of decades. Skinning him alive for a minuscule decision that doesn’t even reflect his policy on the issue itself is about the most counter-productive thing one can do.

  • bopumofu

    Saw him on CNN once claiming Hitler was a commie and therefore libruls are teh eevil.

  • A Geek Tragedy

    [re=201618]SayItWithWookies[/re]: It’s “P.Z. Myers”. “Meyer’s” is the special spelling for godtards who send him angry emails.

  • kapish

    I fear that Hopey is a total dunce when it comes to religion. If he couldn’t get the Dalai Lama, he should have picked a boring apolitical mainstream minister or priest. All the mega-churches are run by despicable con men. Imagine not knowing that!

  • spandrelmatic

    [re=201802]PulledPorkBarrel[/re]: Once upon a time, we had “bigger fish to fry” than desegregation, too. If you were white, I mean. Not that that’s relevant in this … oh, wait.

  • PsycGirl

    [re=201489]magic titty[/re]: Only if you marvel afterwards at how well behaved the gay people were and how you didn’t hear a single one scream “M-fer, bring me more chardonnay”.

    Hey, maybe in this address Rick Warren will include a coming-out speech culminating in his gay wedding to Ann Coulter. It could happen! Two narcissists become one!

  • PulledPorkBarrel

    [re=201822]spandrelmatic[/re]: Comparing the suffering of black people on this continent for half a century of slavery to discrimination against homosexuals is unfair and horribly wrong. So no, its not relevant.
    Also, what you bring up is the major knock most ppl find with FDR. And you know what, WW2/Great Depression… he needed those bigoted Southern votes in Congress to hold together his coalition. Was it right? No. But governing a country competantly is often a nasty thing to do. And when we’re forced to choose between blind adherence to our “values” or competant governance that often features unsavory compromises with characters we feel are repungant…well,i’m choosing the latter. That’s what we pay our politicans to do – govern competantly. When we want them to be standard bearing crusaders for our causes…well…see the last 8 years for proof.
    Leave the morality to parents and preachers, find ways to jump-start the economy, create an alternative-energy industry, broker for peace in hotspots, stop the genocide in darfur, reduce Co2 emissions, get out of Iraq. That’s where Presidents earn their pay, not on taking definate stances on moral issues (which may be in fact legimate gripes- i donated money to anti-prop8 myself, but now that its lost we cant use it to drag obama down). We elected obama to be a president, not the crusading leader of all oppressed peoples in the world.

  • spandrelmatic

    [re=201828]PulledPorkBarrel[/re]: “half a century of slavery”? Snark more, rant less, and for God’s sake invest in a history book.

    Or maybe a proofreader. Just sayin’.

  • PulledPorkBarrel

    [re=201829]spandrelmatic[/re]: you really want to get into a flame war comparing suffering between blacks and gays? Coz the blacks would win, hands down.

    Just sayin’

  • spandrelmatic

    [re=201829]spandrelmatic[/re]: P.S. – The “relevant” thing was about the fact that President-elect Obama is (wait for it) … oh, never mind.

    And I’d watch how I used “we” if “I” were “you”, Lone Ranger.

  • PulledPorkBarrel

    [re=201834]spandrelmatic[/re]: Relevant ’cause … Oh that he’s black too? You don’t say, never caught that on TV…

    Gay rights – Civil rights, perfect parallel eh?

    That’s what they thought in california

  • spandrelmatic

    [re=201840]PulledPorkBarrel[/re]: And it’s PPB for the win!

  • howell

    When I hear “Saddleback” it conjures up images of twisted gay group sex. Or is it just me?

  • Makeithurt

    How would Assholebama like it if JFK had invited some preacher who thinks that blacks should become white before they can be loved by God. JESUS!!!!! I knew this kind of shit was going to happen with Obama. I knew it!!!!!

  • King of Pants

    My god, it’s as if a politician used a captive constituency to get what he wanted and then tossed you aside once you were no longer useful! But you know, I’m sure that, considering the gay community couldn’t even get their act together to find effective messaging to counter an obviously-illegal referendum in California that would restrict their own rights, they’ll be sure to be a meaningful counterweight to any sort of personal problems Obama may have with homosexuality.

    The LGBT community: bottoming for Democrats since 1992.

    My blood is boiling and I just fired off an angry screed to change.gov (not that it will do one whit of good).

    MY POINT. But at least you acknowledge your gesture is empty. I wonder what might happen if you actually did something about it.

  • poptarts &#39

    [re=201886]howell[/re]: I think ‘Bareback’– or in Warren’s case, ‘BEARback’.

  • Yellow Cake

    I’d love to see the look on Rev. dick Warren’s face when he sees the Gay Marching Band having anal sex right in the middle of Pennsylvania Ave.

  • friendlynerd

    [re=201912]King of Pants[/re]:
    Who the fuck do you think you are? Are you trying to be funny? If so, you failed.

  • NotNotLickingToads

    Isn’t an invocation just an opening prayer?

  • NotNotLickingToads

    It’s also worth noting that Clinton had Billy Graham’s son for both of his invocations.

  • stellabella

    I’m not kidding, I am SPITTING NAILS MAD about this. My only consolation is that I’ll be in the crowd on the mall to boo this fat fuck.

    He can spout all he wants about his compassion for the victims of AIDS in Africa and genocide in Darfur, but he propagates rhetoric in his own country that perpetuates the demonization of gays and women. If you think that the things he says don’t really matter you need to put down the crack pipe. He is a dangerous man. Gay marriage is like incest—I’ve heard students on my campus talk about gays as genetically defective, like retarded people. Warren and his ilk are the masterminds of that twisted shitty bigotry. People learn IN CHURCH to talk this way.

    As as my husband says, Barry can throw all the bones he wants to the Sarah Palin crowd, they ain’t never gonna vote for a Negro.

  • Deepthroat

    um, i’m all for the gays having the same rights as other people who make the mistake of gettin’ hitched, but I’m REALLY upset with the fact that he is completely anti-choice, compares abortion to the Holocaust, and just the simple fact that there is an invocation at the inauguration of the president AT ALL. What the fuck are we invoking, Menon? Fuck that shit. I has a BEEEG sad.

  • Deepthroat

    FreshCliches: I love you.

  • King of Pants

    [re=201919]friendlynerd[/re]: No, I wasn’t trying to be funny! So swift of you to pick up on that. What I’m saying is this: the LGBT community is trapped. Can’t go to the Republicans, yet the Democrats can’t really seem to do anything for ’em at all! So they keep voting Democrat, because can’t vote Republican! It’s exactly like evangelicals who can’t vote Democrat, cuz they’re godless sodomites, but never get shit from the Republicans. My God, it’s as if the two political parties are playing two antagonistic demographics off one another in an endless struggle to keep them utterly polarized and make sure that there’s no real reconciliation!

    One of the more brilliant lines in Angels of America comes from the character of Roy Cohn, soliloquizing about why he isn’t a homosexual (because they are powerless, unlike big bad Roy Cohn, who fucks men AND can call Nancy Reagan whenever he wants), and I have to paraphrase here, but: “Homosexuals are people who, in ten years of trying, can’t get a piss-ant anti-discrimination bill passed in the city council.” Politicians have been beating on the gays for decades now, and they keep trying to take the legal route. The problem is that, although by law they are absolutely in the right (and the fact that Californians could vote to strip gay Americans of their rights is absolutely fucking appalling), that don’t matter when no one in legal power gains anything by helping the LGBT community at all.

    So my question is: how much longer will the LGBT community continue to get burnt by the Democratic Party? MLK Jr. didn’t hitch his wagon to either of the political parties; he organized from the ground up, and challenged both parties to follow him. As long as there are no consequences for politicians to continually dump on the gays, they will do so. As long as Obama can suffer no consequences for continuing the American tradition of letting some evangelical windbag invoke God and Christ and all that nonsense on Inauguration Day, he will.

    Or, everyone can move to Massachusetts, where there’s been gay marriage for four years and everyone’s just kinda over it.

  • Bass-o-Matic

    Hey Barry! How’s it goin? I’m good. Got “married” to my partner a few weeks back – thank goodness I didn’t take my uncle up on his offer to host the party in California, right? Anyhow – congrats on winning the election – glad we could help.

    Which brings me to my reason for writing. Uhh… Yikes, this is kind of awkward. Well… do you remember that $500 we donated to your campaign? Yeah… I’m going to need that back. Sure, sure, I get the need to work with people we may not disagree with, blah, blah, blah… But Rick Warren? Opening the inauguration – really?

    No hard feelings tho – we’ll still totally catch up on facebook, right?

  • Bass-o-Matic

    Hey Barry – sorry about the typo – meant to say people we DO, in fact, disagree with. Silly me!

  • friendlynerd

    [re=202003]King of Pants[/re]:
    Okay, but aside from calling everyone else’s efforts empty, what do you suggest be done about it? Go third-party? Talk about empty.

  • coldstoli

    Faggots comparing their struggle to the civil rights movement is, more than anything, a testimony to the complete bankruptcy of the American educational system: Little children, stomping up and down about Prop. 8, like the boy blue sailors from ACTUP or Queer Nation, not realizing that the issue isn’t love its POWER.

    Newsflash to all bobsie twins: Obama aint’ your guy, you wuz had.

  • cutie1

    Warren is most likely just another Ted Haggard, Minister Barnes, Sen Craig, etc – a long long list of self hating maggots who turned their self hate into hate for others, and meanwhile succeeded in using it to persue the root of all evil, the almighty dollar.

    I consider myself str8, but for warren and his kind, I’d dick those shits till a proctologist and parasitologist would give up re repairing them, and give them a colostomy bag instead.

    Obama should fucking fire who ever gave warren such visibility at his inauguration. To invite him, sure, but to give him visibility like that – hey – except for it’s more common connotation re the lynching of black people and their castration as well, I’d be looking to bring a rainbow colored noose to hold up while warren spoke.

    He loves gay people the way hitler loved the Jews – it satisfied the need of his ego for his daily dose of hate.

  • cutie1

    While I think Obama’s team selecting warren was terrible, lets not forget that he is at least reasonable re gay rights. And he is anything but the shitbrain Bush, who has destroyed our country, perhaps permanently with his war, his economic – destroy the middle class, and his rimming the ass of the pope and all the segregationist decendant preachers, who were fathered by Satan.

    Ripping off some votes from the repubs makes sense. Think of what could happen if Obama had 60 solid votes in the senate. And remember that the election was about the supreme court not being refilled with the christian taliban and the catholic’s sons of satan chosen by the pope, who reads Mein Kampf every day, just as his nazi masters taught him to do in his youth.

    I don’t like the situation at all re our gay citizens, but it is better then it could have been. And remember that part of Bush’s regime goals sure looks like it was to not only steal the middle class’s homes and jobs, but with his economic calamnities, he would have driven more and more good desperate middle class people into the arms of the freak right wing preachers – anything for hope, real or imagined – , creating what Gingrich (maggot has had 3 wives and who knows how many underage boys for his demo of his family values) hoped would be a permanent republican majority.

    so lets use our heads here, keep the pressure up re warren, etc, and get the gay community energized as it has never been energized before. And things will for sure get better.

    And our final goal is to teach in the schools what brainwashing means, and how the christian right uses guilt, the terrorism of hell if you don’t do as they say, the scam insurance policy of life after death (Just like Islam, which promised the 9/11 ‘martyrs/ paradise with 72 virgins each to fuck for their pleasure) – it is all bullshit, from a diarrhea laden cow.And of course these freak leaders set themselves up to cleanse your sins. And isn’t prayer just a variant of how you build an army and get it to do any kind of terrible deeds, as did people like hitler, stalin, mao, hirohito, etc.

    And for those young enough, you can bet that within 20-25 years, we will both create basic cellular life forms from non-living chemicals, and fully human and beyond, self aware personalities in computers. Proving that life is a natural thing given the right conditions and a half billion years of natures experimenting. And then the churches will become museums, to be gawked at where people realize their pronouncements of the right wing churches are just more crap like the past popes pronouncements that the earth was flat. And the worst of mankinds inventions will be tossed into the proverbial garbage can. Free at last, Free at last, thank Science almighty we are free at last. (Sorry I couldn’t resist, but Dr. MLK was absolutely a great man, who used religion for what it ought to be – uplifting, not hatred.)

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