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JOBS NOBODY WANTS

Former Ohio Secretary Of State Running For RNC

This tool again?Robert Kennedy Jr. will attest that Ken Blackwell is the literal reincarnation of Beelzebub, who rode a steaming sleigh of entrails from the bowels of Hell to Ohio in order to help George W. Bush steal the election of 2004. This makes him a perfect candidate to run the Republican National Committee as it faces an ever more glorious future.

You know who runs the RNC today? That’s right, you don’t! That is because the position’s current occupant is so humiliated and demoralized by his terrible job that he has gladly accepted a minimum-wage position as a fart-smeller in a medical research lab. Who will step into the void? Ken Blackwell and his trusty pal Tina Benkiser, who signs a letter announcing her co-candidacy thus: “I wish a joyous holiday season!” (WTF.)

Blackwell and Benkiser look to lead the RNC [Political Ticker]


9:45 AM on Wed December 17 2008
By Sara K. Smith
3243 Views

  1. snideinplainsight says at 9:50 am, December 17th, 2008

    Didn’t that dude just NOT get cabinetsified as secretary of agricultures?

  2. snideinplainsight says at 9:51 am, December 17th, 2008

    Sorry, wrong dude, same ’stache.

  3. Advocatus_Diaboli says at 9:53 am, December 17th, 2008

    Who is Ben, and does this Tina do more than kis?

  4. bfstevie says at 9:54 am, December 17th, 2008

    Is it true that this guy will offer a snarky “worst dressed” list every year? And what does Bill Kristol think about this?

  5. 4tehlulz says at 9:56 am, December 17th, 2008

    Oh yes, Ken Blackwell, from the failed Ohio GOP, and Tina Bensiker, a tool from the Texas GOP.

    LOL THAT’S CHANGE I CAN BELIEVE IN

  6. Canmon (the Inadequate) says at 9:56 am, December 17th, 2008

    Something’s wrong with the color on my monitor.

  7. Advocatus_Diaboli says at 9:57 am, December 17th, 2008

    Dear Miss Bendover,
    1983 called and it wants its hairstyle back.

    http://www.texasgop.org/site/PageServer?pagename=Chairman_Benkisers_Bio

  8. qwerty42 says at 9:58 am, December 17th, 2008

    bfstevie: Yeah, what gives with him being a Republican. Is he gay?

  9. Dan Perino says at 9:58 am, December 17th, 2008

    snideinplainsight: Not the ’stache; it’s the same squinty look of total (and failed) concentration.

  10. wolfcatcher says at 10:01 am, December 17th, 2008

    Sad to say that this Uncle Tom could one day be elected President of the United States of Love.

  11. Blackwell should demand a big bonus for turning things around by getting Saxby Chambliss elected, then split.

    I suppose when CNN runs ads for Candy Crowley, we’ll remember these as the good old days.

  12. norbizness says at 10:02 am, December 17th, 2008

    If we assume that Ken Blackwell is a man of normal height, then Campbell really is over 88 feet tall.

    And Tina Pretty Ballerina’s hair is actually a Hillary-cut from 1993, which qualifies as contemporary or even from the near-future in trend-challenged Texas.

  13. BarthexDeRosa says at 10:02 am, December 17th, 2008

    I wish holiday you have happy. Me want job.

  14. wolfcatcher says at 10:03 am, December 17th, 2008

    Oh, hi Campbell. Sorry, I didn’t see you when i was writing my post . . . well, this is awkward.

  15. Michael Steele sits quietly enraged somewhere in Hyattsville, wondering why they overlooked him once again.

  16. Blackwell. Appropriate name. In Bizarro world, since he does not do black well.

  17. norbizness: She looks like a State Farm agent from Dubuque I laid once.

    *shrug* It was a lonely night. I’m not proud.

  18. Fear of a Black Reagan says at 10:09 am, December 17th, 2008

    Don’t even bother with snark on that one huh? Blackwell jes’ speaks for himself I guess.

  19. ManchuCandidate says at 10:10 am, December 17th, 2008

    Yay! (minority and Dem) Voter caging and suppression for everyone!!

    Who is going to handle RNC minority outreach? David Duke?

  20. Dan Perino says at 10:12 am, December 17th, 2008

    Shhhh. Is she still there? —————–>

    Des Wonkes are secretly selling
    downloads of AdBlock.

  21. Terry: win

  22. Monsieur Grumpe says at 10:13 am, December 17th, 2008

    “I wish a joyous holiday season!” sounds like Xmas haters to me. Where’s BillO when you need him? Oh right.

    actor212:
    Pictures?

  23. “Set forth a fresh vision for our Party, yet one committed to our conservative principles”
    That’s an invitation for conflict if I ever saw one.

  24. What’s with this gigantic picture of Campbell Brown staring at me?

  25. OT, but … I’m not sure Bloomberg headlines get any better than this:

    http://www.bloomberg.com/apps/news?pid=20601102&sid=a4X4XSXn4aHw&refer=uk

  26. Dreamer: Backoff buddy, she’s looking at me.

  27. PeteJayhawk v2.0 says at 10:26 am, December 17th, 2008

    Stepin Fetchit for Prez 2012!

  28. hugrygirl says at 10:27 am, December 17th, 2008

    As a (kind of) Ohioan, I can say without a doubt that I hate Ken Blackwell only less than I hate Bob Taft.

  29. timeoutofmind says at 10:27 am, December 17th, 2008

    this will help remind anyone who still pays attention to politics that, if the GOP goes through with this, that they are still avowedly the party of corruption and vice. this guy is a gutter snake, and if the repubs are happy to have him in charge, i’m happy they’re happy.

  30. That guy is a traitor to is mustache.

  31. BarthexDeRosa says at 10:28 am, December 17th, 2008

    Dreamer: This is Campbell Brown Presents: WONKETTE!!, a subsidiary of CNN Globotechnocracy, Inc.

    Where’ve you been?

  32. shanemcgowan says at 10:29 am, December 17th, 2008

    Holiday Season!? HOLIDAY SEASON!? Are the Texas Republicans trolling for the commie-muslin vote?

  33. queeraselvis v 2.0 says at 10:31 am, December 17th, 2008

    facehead: Appropriate, given that we’re talking about Repubs here.

  34. Larry McAwful says at 10:32 am, December 17th, 2008

    Ken Blackwell? The NAMBLA expert? No kidding?

    http://www.buckeyestateblog.com/ken_blackwell_for_nambla_president

  35. facehead: Must be a Republican…. he’s a crook AND has a name that just screams I LIKE TEH BUTTSECKS!

  36. robanybody says at 10:36 am, December 17th, 2008

    I wonder what rude comment Ken Blackwell will have about Campbell’s outfit and where she’ll be on his top 10 Worst Dressed list this year. Probably something like “Unitarian Minister meets Blue Light Special.” God, I’m so glad the guy’s not really dead.

  37. facehead: YIKES! There are THREE Campbel Brown’s on my page!! It’s like Mr. Smith in the Matrix movies, replicating all over the place!! Scary scary shit, especially since the morning caffiene buzz hasn’t kicked in yet!

  38. The only change that the GOP can muster is their appetite from altar boys to boy scouts.

  39. shortsshortsshorts says at 10:49 am, December 17th, 2008

    GOP winning strategy (DO NOT TELL THEM THE SECRET K?):

    Ronald Reagan’s DNA will be combined with Barry Goldwater, with the face of JFK. The experiment will go wrong however when Goldwater mavericks out and Reagan, who is a sad pushoever, and a sap, is unsure what to do with himself. They will turn to the face of JFK for answers, but it will be too late. JFK will have already ignited a nuclear vendetta against the Rooskies, and all hope is lost. Then, after a billion 9/11’s happen the real GOP favorite, Former Mayor 9/11, will descend to take his thrown forever.
    /fixed.

    Dreamer: She’s paying the bills, apparently.

  40. timeoutofmind: you libruls are so hard to please. First there’s all the ranting about the small tent. Then we lift up the flap and allow a few gutter snakes in, and all of the sudden …

  41. Since all black people look alike, they might be trying to confuse people into thinking the likable black guy who’s making all the good decisions is really a Republican in charge of the RNC. But if anyone is fit to lead the Republicans, it’s a guy who got embarrassed by a Democrat in a red leaning state when he tried to run on Republican ideas. There are a lot of them now, he feels their pain.

    http://thesebastards.blogspot.com/

  42. The Pugs say, “We’ll get us a nigra, too!” Just like last fall they said, “We’ll get us a gal too!” BTW “accepted a minimum-wage position as a fart-smeller in a medical research lab” is a truly inspired turn of phrase. Here here!

  43. space stout says at 11:32 am, December 17th, 2008

    Terry: while plotting to have Blackwell killed so he can assume his identity…

  44. Woodwards Friend says at 11:47 am, December 17th, 2008

    I’m still voting for Ronald Reagan’s corpse. I don’t care if they reanimate him or not. Just dig him up and make him RNC chair. Even dead, the Gipper has far more life in him then Mitt Romney and the rest of this dreck.

  45. facehead: is she not married to that guy who represented the most incompetent adminstration ever.

    shortsshortsshorts: BarthexDeRosa: who sold out Newell or Ken? At least it is not GVS at Fox.

  46. Hooray For Anything says at 12:47 pm, December 17th, 2008

    Blackwell should because he excels at the one thing Republicans are good at, mainly stealing elections

  47. Purple Tide says at 1:19 pm, December 17th, 2008

    Larry McAwful: Repugs are obSESSED with pedophilia. It’s a prerequisite for party membership. Mr. Blackwell, tell me more about this North American Mailboy Love Association…

  48. smoke5032 says at 1:38 pm, December 17th, 2008

    We in Ohio are well acquainted with this prick. He was pretty shameless about suppressing voter turnout in Democratic districts in 2004, so much so that when he ran for governor two years later, he was opposed by a nebbish congressman and ex schoolteacher and got, oh, six or seven votes. He had also tied his campaign strategy to every mega-preacher and snake handling evangelist in the state, thus basing his support on the hicks in their congregations who wouldn’t vote for a black man this side of judgment day. This is the political acumen the GOP needs now - Go Ken!

  49. populucious says at 2:01 pm, December 17th, 2008

    Servo: My grandma did perfect the recipe for this, it involved a good solid hunk of wood (or an iron pipe, in an emergency), Downy, a hot iron and homemade potato starch. Alas, she did not pass the secret on before she left us for the senior living complex.

  50. populucious:
    Southern-style?

  51. Dreamer: It would be irresponsible not to speculate.

  52. finallyhappy says at 3:17 pm, December 17th, 2008

    People have to run for this position? You would think it would be a punishment because we all know the RNC will take more hits in the next election cycle.

  53. hobospacejungle says at 4:02 pm, December 17th, 2008

    Tina Benkiser’s never had sex before, has she?

  54. You slack shouldered sack of nuts. We’d just look like a bunch of Johnny-Come-Lately’s, breaking out our own negro, it doesn’t matter how dark. And that’s the goddamned problem right there. People think this Obama has fresh ideas. He’s Au Courant and we’re the past.

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