Wonkette
A Georgia Congressman, Sanford Bishop, has been cited as being on the short list for whatever snoozer of a position Obama still needs to fill in his Cabinet… Ah, the position would be Secretary of Agriculture. You know, “farms.” Well the liberal Internet would hate this guy, it appears, because he’s a conservative Democrat who loves war and, more pertinently, usually sides with big agribusiness. In other words, the liberal Internet must destroy him immediately, with an embarrassing story, before he becomes President of Farms. And this is why the very liberal Firedoglake blog is now telling a comical story about how this Bishop guy wandered around restricted airplane areas to piss in a cup, once.
There is no linky to an original story on this Firedoglake post, but this probably happened:
But there’s a slight whiff of scandal that could dampen the fervor for his appointment: In 2002, Bishop was questioned by airport security. On a flight from Washington to Atlanta, Bishop used a plastic cup as his personal WC when the lines for the bathroom looked too long. Bishop was detained and questioned after landing because the place he picked to pee–the section between the cockpit and first-class–is considered a secure area in the post 9/11 world. More importantly, like what did he do with his bodily fluids–hand them to an attendant to dump? Do it himself? And did he wash up afterward?
Did he drink the pee? Did he also go poo in a cup? What did he do with THAT? Why was he on an airplane? Does he know Osama? Is there one likable thing about this plane pisser? Does he piss on crops?
UPDATE: Never mind.
He Peed in a Cup: Meet the Potential Secretary of Agriculture [Firedoglake]
Bishop cited for agriculture post [AJC]
Maybe he was practicing for an upcoming drug test.
This would be the fistr Bad Cabinet Chosie that the Obama folks have made.
There are about 1,000 other people who are better qualified to head USDA. This guy is not the choice–he won’t last more than a year.
Get someone who has real experience farming and ranching and working the fields–not a suit poseur like this doofus.
Because no one, ever, has had to go to the loo at an inconvenient time on a flight…
Maybe he did drink the pee. You don’t know. You just don’t know.
Oh, Sissy Saxby will be so happy about this.
This is why I just pee on the flight attendants.
Perhaps he can become Secretary of Cow Flatulence, instead. There’s not much difference between that and Agriculture. CF is a very serious issue. Or BF, I should say.
That wasn’t urine, that was airplane wine. Hard to tell sometimes.
This would be a sucky choice and despite all the other mc crappants we are witnessing as the world goes to hell in handbasket, this would piss me off more than anything. energy, climate change, food security, etc., etc., are all wrapped up on this position. euf!
2 agriculture secretaries 1 cup
FDL has become has vacuous as the MSM. gg purity trolls.
Give him a break — he only peed in the cup because the airplane’s wheels were retracted.
i would prefer fred sanford.
This would never have happened to David Vitter.
Naked Bunny with a Whip: Are you Bobby Brown?
STOP PEEING IN THE CUP SIR YOU ARE GOING TO CONTAMINATE THE SPINACH.
Of course, I always fly business class (love how it sounds - “business class”) so I always just pee into my hands, then dry them on an attendent, or anyone close… I think this is about the old FmHA keeping agri-loans out of the hands of black folks in Georgia for so many years…
His lame glasses and goofy ’stach reek of an male flight attendant*. He could probably get away with serving it to some old lady upfront who wanted applejuice and no whiskey.
*he could only be a flight attendant on a US airline - international airlines (except BA) have much hotter attendants, not 55 year old washed up union employees. My personal shout out goes to Emirates and Singapore - they are usually smokin’
One Candidate One Cup.
…oh God, Chris Matthews is chewing up another right-winger! Political Porn!
If this is Democratic appointee “scandal”, what the hell do you call the last 8 years of Republican X-treeem Perversion?
Then security made him drink it, to prove it wasn’t a liquid bomb.
Fucking A, is this all it takes to disqualify you for cabinet position? I sure hope they don’t find out about the time I vomited all over myself and passed out drunk on that Honolulu - SeaTac flight…
Seriously though… If being ‘competent’ and ‘qualified’ also means ‘dreadfully boring with no hard-partying lifestyle’ count me the fuck out of politics.
I prefer that Barry appoint someone who drinks piss rather than the KoolAid.
shortsshortsshorts: Pre-xactly! A mighty win! Thank you Shorts!
he was probably trying to get out of boning larry craig in the men’s room, poor guy. don’t blame him, i’d rather piss in a cup than go down on scary larry and his eyebrows of doom.
As a person who lives on a small farm, I say it’s the cup that disqualifies him, particularly for Dept of Ag. Cups are for sissies. Furries and farmers don’t need ‘em.
He’s a shoo in. Everybody on Senate Ag hunts ducks; they’ve all peed in beer bottles.
NoWireHangers: I’m thinking astronaut diapers. Hudson News will be stocking them in selected markets by New Year’s. First to get the supplies: Atlanta. Because, after all, every time I fly through Atlanta, I feel like I’ve been pissed and shat on (Thanks, Delta!).
Sanford has supported amendments outlawing flag burning and queer marriages, and pushed for allowing children to pray in public schools. He also named a courthouse after somebody, supported a crop-mix rotation bill, and pressed to have a coin minted to commemorate infantrymen. And he’s been good at earmarks. I say give the guy a chance. He’s a perfect match with Bush standards for intellectual vigor and the ability to set appropriate priorities…oh, wait…
The most pressing question is: were any pubic hairs left on his coke can.
Are you Bobby Brown?
I pee where I want, am prone to violent outbursts, and don’t have custody of Whitney Houston’s daughter. You decide!
Onterrio Smith likes this guy’s style.
/too soon?
But there’s a slight whiff of scandal that could dampen the fervor for his appointment. . .
Don’t you think “fervor” might be a little strong Jim, where is the freakin groundswell for this thing, oh and please like you never urinated in a cup/beer bottle/out your bedroom window, would that disqualify you as Ag/Sec? If the shoe fis. . .
This reminds me when I was in Prague, in the early 1990s I couldn’t find anyone to explain to me where the bathroom was in the Penseon style hotel I was staying at. I ended up peeing in beer bottles and throwing them out the windows (15 floors up)
And would please get freaking Campbell Brown off my comment!!!
So, if you pee in a cup on a commercial flight, don’t do it in a secure area, or you’ll have to answer for it.
And why, exactly, isn’t the whole plane a secure area? Does the front of the plane detach, if necessary, leaving the proletariat to their doom?
I think we should throw our shoes at the TSA.
He didn’t drink the pee, as far I as know…
Sources have noted that several of Sanford Bishop’s fellow travelers found the fragrance of the emission quite pleasant. InBev now wants the recipe, which is crazy talk. How could those crazy Dutch think it’s possible to improve Budweiser with a man’s urine? Everybody knows what it needs is horse piss.
Bishop could not be reached to confirm the InBev story.
Eh, this guy obvs can’t hold his liquor. He merits the Wonkette Seal of Disapproval for that alone.
Unsubstantiated rumor time now is it?
Sanford eats dick.
Don’t believe me? Give me evidence to the contrary.
WATCH IT TONIGHT ON CNN AT 8:00 p.m.
NO BIASSSSSS!!!!111!
There’s a slight whiff of urine that could dampen the scandal for his fervor.
Admittedly OT:
Fun to be had here. http://www.oregonlive.com/oregon/
Do me a favor, as an earnest coffee-swilling yoga-doing and vegetarian Oregonian: vote for option “C” and ignore the temptation of the humpy beaver at the bottom.
ForTheTurnstiles: will not vote for flag with
no nod to ken kesey.
serj!: I’ve heard about her. Has this show on MSNBC weeknights at 9, I think.
I must tune in some time.
p-Sludge: From the beaver one: “The backside is the start of something good.” Well, obviously, but WTF kind of flags do you people have out there? A different design on the back? WTF?!
And option C is by a 95 year old who doesn’t use computers? Richard Cohen?
Will CB be doing a segment on this story tonight?
ForTheTurnstiles: Flag “C” looks like it forgot to zip up. Flag “D” is obviously sucking up to Obama. Flag “E” is just a reverse-color Maryland flag. Flag “F” - a dead fish, great.
I don’t know if Oregon even deserves a flag, frankly.
The only question is, when will Campbell Brown focus her laser-like attention (eyes?) on this breaking story?
NoWireHangers: Drinking one’s pee is a survival technique, afterall.
He peed in a cup because there was no BUSH around to pee
ONbehind.2druk2phluq: I thought that’s what Budweiser was already?
Godot: dammit. you beat me to it!
Breaking news from CNN:
Barack Obama on Wednesday will announce Iowa Gov. Tom Vilsack as his agriculture secretary pick, a transition aide says.
Piss ONCE in a cup, you are labeled for life!
And I was soo looking forward to FOUR YEARS of piss boy references!!
If drinking pee was good enough for Gandhi it’s good enough for Hopey’s future Farm King.
azw88: This is a sad day for urinations everywhere.
Borat: Pretty much every gay sex story ever starts with, “This reminds me when I was in Prague, in the early 1990s”.
ForTheTurnstiles: This grevillea: was meant to be to you.
Vilsack once defecated in an empty “Ruffles” bag on a Greyhound bus from Boise to Sioux City. Google it!!
actor212: I have yet to urinate in a cup, no matter how long the bathroom line was on a flight.
I must have misheard - I thought CB was doing an expose on C-cups.
azw88: I mean,
This is a sad day for Ur Nation.
Yours and mine.
WE MUST INVESTIGATE THE CONNECTIONS. This guy peed in a CUP; Rod Blagojevich KNOWS Tony REZKO; Tony Rezko drinks coffee from CUPS; WHAT DID OBAMA KNOW AND WHEN DID HE KNOW IT!!1!!11???
So BBC announces Duncan as Sec of Ed but then does an interview with Michelle Rhee- is BBC dissing PEBO and his choice? And besides I bet Rhee was never a Aussie pro basketball player.
Those of us out here on the internets call it a URI nation.
But can he hit a three from way downtown?
glamourdammerung: Well excuse us, Queen Elizabeth the Second. I suppose you’re going to tell us next that you’ve never shat in a flowerpot when caught short while visitin’ the big city, Your Highness.
Elitist.
He should’ve offered his cup of “apple juice” to the screaming kid, or offer a “beer” to the narcissistic businessman that won’t shut the fuck up.
ForTheTurnstiles: Seriously? You mention humpy beaver & expect Wonketeers to ignore it? Might as well have just posted “go to this website & vote for the humpy beaver, please.” Because that’s what I did. I voted for the humpy beaver. And now you are left to explain how the humpy beaver became Oregon’s new flag when most of the people who voted for it don’t live anywhere near Oregon or know much about it. Like that full-service at gas stations is THE LAW. How crazy is that, humpy beaver?
NOTHING that a pol has done
in the past will escape
scrutiny from now on.
Before OBAMA has been in
office a year, some of the
SHIT that he swam in while
breast strokin’ through that
CESSPOLL that is Chi Town
politics will STINK UP his
little administration.
All those “present” votes in
the IL legislature won’t
save his slimy little ass.
If you pissed your pants
on the first day of kindergarten
50 years ago, somebody will report
it, and Rush Limbaugh will
jump on it (if the pisser is a
lefty) as evidence that you
“can’t handle pressure”. It amazes
me that these effin’ pols think that
they can just “skate” into power
without their entire past being
micro-examined. These fucks really
DO believe in their own special
wonderfulness.
hobospacejungle: Agreed. I could not resist the beaver. In fact, since there were two beavers, I had to vote several times for each of them.
hobospacejungle: Humpy beaver leads with 23%. Go Humpy Beaver!
Brotha ovah in Alabama, Artur Davis, would do a hell of a job somewhere. Way better man than Bishop. Better man than any other Alabama pol. Ag should be a more important department, with hemp and all. Bobby Brown can’t handle the ag job since he married Campbell.
What is that, haiku with a glandular condition?
Cesspool in Chi-town
Someone needs to take down
an overactive hairpiece
Cabinet is missing
a few ghostly, empty pols
noone can measure
the vast, unbroachable distance
between
a pisser and a lefty.
I peed in a beer bottle once. Except, I’m a girl, and it really didn’t ‘go’ as planned…
Pat Pending: Thanks for playing! In the Great Central Illinois Blizzard of 1977, my friend Rosemarie peed out her whole name, in the snow, without stamping out any letters. She entirely defeated “Bob” and “John” who were both serious and experienced opponents. Once you get beyond beer bottles, the ground is the limit!
So Vilsack got it? Great, there’ll be no shutting up Hamsher now…
I bet Barack read Wonkette and thought, “I can’t do this. The opinion leaders will crucify me.” And so he chose Vilsack. We did it again!
Pat Pending: They let girls on Wonkette?
“I’m not sure what ‘phallocentric’ means, but no girls!”