Wonkette
- The brother of Iraq’s most famous shoe-throwing journalist says the journalist was beaten in custody. [BBC News]
- European bank HSBC exposed one billion of its precious hot dollars to notorious ponzi schemer Bernard Madoff. [MarketWatch]
- Police found explosives in a Paris department store after they were tipped off by the Agence France-Presse. It’s a media fairy tale! [New York Times]
- Man! She got a cover story on Time and everything, and yet DC’s education chancellor, Michelle Rhee, got passed over for Secretary of Education. The post will go to Barack Obama’s Chicago crony Arne Duncan instead. [Washington Post]
- Oh noes, the Detroit bailout is on hold while President Bush “looks at the data.” [Detroit Free Press]
- Moderate centrist Coloradan Senator Ken Salazar will be the Secretary of the Interior, so quit your whining, Hispanics, you got another one. [Los Angeles Times]
Hmm….one wonders if W will confuse complex bailout info with “My Pet Goat”. Also, can’t they trade out Campbell for Anderson Cooper or for some one else hot at CNN (even the Muslin Fareed Zakaria will do)?
“The brother of Iraq’s most famous shoe-throwing journalist says the journalist was beaten in custody.”
Good to see the Iraqis really are becoming just like us.
Why not put the administrators of Sidwell Friends in charge of Education?
Oh, wait. That would be a waste of their time and a waste of effort on those smelly losers known as American Public School Students.
Was he beaten with a shoe? That is apparently an insult in Iraqi culture.
When has Bush EVER been concerned about data? I thought if you can dream something, it is true! Like a dreamed last night I was married to Campbell Brown, and now her image is burned into my retna (which is a good thing)
Good morning, Campbell sweetie! I missed your glowing white teeth! Y’know, Omnipresent Campbell Brown is kind of like your first pubes. At first you’re freaked out, then it starts to grow on you.
No bias? That’s bull. She is married to Dan Senor. I wonder if he has an agenda
Borat: Or for that matter, facts, or the truth and stuff…
GM, Ford, and Chrysler have to wait while Bush looks at the data? So long, auto industry.
I think that a 120-foot tall statue called “Campbell Brown of the Andes” should be erected posthaste. And that she should be named Secretary of Ross Dress For Less Ensembles.
Mr. Ariel seems big on the charter school thing, having founded the Ariel Community Academy connected to Ariel investments, with an 98% African American student body and this is their policy–doesn’t say “Blut und Ehre” though:
Ariel Community Academy Uniform Policy:
We are very serious in enforcing our uniform policy.
Uniforms are light blue tops with Ariel patch and navy blue pants and/or skirts.
All middle school students are required to wear ties.
Students are allowed to wear Ariel gym uniform and gym shoes only on Gym days.
Hoodies and Jeans are NOT part of our uniform.
Any student that is out of uniform will be given a detention.
We are committed to uncompromising excellence and the level of expectation for student achievement and compliance will not be compromised.
Oh, headline I browsed this morning in local communist propaganda rag “Toronto Star” in Canada city, while I was on my way to work (haha, just kidding, who has a job) that if the Big 3 fail, Canada will lose 580,000 jobs! How is that possible, in a country with 15 million employed people, to lose half a million jobs based on three foreign companies? So hey, tell this Shoetoss Bush chap to keep stalling that bailout thing, because it has the unintended but highly desirable effect of ruining Canada, ha!
I also had a weird, gin-soaked dream last night which had Campbell as Lady Godiva, riding buck naked through the streets of East Austin on the back of a bull. But I had to remind myself it was all a fantasy, because she’s emphatically stated in this fucking ad that won’t go away that she will have NO BULL.
Bias and bull is the only reason to even watch cable news. Without it’s just called “news”, and it’s already on all of your normal broadcast channels about 3 times a day
All this news about big banks stupidly loosing money in obvious ponzi schemes, hispanics taking over the federal government and our current president considering auto-industry options…does it really matter now, at this time of year? This is the time of year we should be teaching our children the most valuable lesson… “Break a deal…face the Wheel.” It’s bartertown, baby!
These French terr’usts don’t sound too scary! They left a bundle of old dynamite in a washroom at a store, with no detonator, and just sat back waiting for the chaos. The French, having seen a few hostile invasion threats before, find the whole idea of domestic terrorism quaint and blasé, and pretty much kept on with their snooty lives
Darehead: OOOPS. I meant Mr. Duncan, the Education Secretary wannabe.
“Looks at the data” translation: consult magic eight ball, read Jughead comics and ask Dick what to do.
You know who else had a cover story in Time magazine? Adolf Hitler, that’s who. So should Barack Obama choose Adolf Hitler to be his Secretary of Education? I think not.
Get over it, Michelle Rhee. We’re judging you by the company you keep.
I’m kind of on the fence with Muntadar the Shoetosser, the Loafer Lobber, the Wingtip Whipper, the Plain-toe Pitcher, etc. I mean, his whole “Hey, you guys came here to instill democracy and personal freedoms, maybe I should not get my ass tortured in jail forever for my act of civil disobedience” schtick kind of has a point.
Arne Duncan, or “Acne” to his friends.
Bush “looks at the data.”
He thinks that if he squints and stares at it long enough, he’ll see a dolphin or a UFO floating above the frame.
Click here to lose your boner for Campbell:
http://www.nytimes.com/2006/04/09/fashion/weddings/09vows.html
Gross.
mattbolt:
Loafer Lobber!
You rule.
Maybe we can get him to help W look at the data.
Delivered via shoe mail.
One word at a time.
In ever enlaging font.
Delicious: The fact that she’s willing to marry a gay, sterile Republican shithead propagandist for money and insider connections, and do so in a conspicuous, douchebaggy fashion only speaks more to why she is America’s greatest treasure and why the Wonkette editors probably aren’t even charging CNN to ruin their website with her shitty advertisement.
mattbolt: “Civil disobedience”? Is that what they’re calling attempted assault these days?
I won’t deny that I wish at least one of the shoes had connected, but he still should be punished for this somehow. Maybe a small fine or something. Torture is a bit much. I realize torture is part of the brand of democracy we exported to Iraq, but still.
Haha. A messican secretary of the interior. I guess that pretty much decides immigration policy!
(To be fair, I like Salazar and voted for him several times. But it’s still funny.)
mattbolt:
Still laughing about Loafer Lobber….not quite sure why?
Footgear Flipper
Sandal Slinger
Platform Pitcher
Chukka Chucker
Flip Flop Flinger
also…
Salazar? Eh? Interior is one post to NOT give to a “centrist”.
Well, reading this:
“He outraged many religious conservatives when he called James Dobson, head of Focus on the Family, “the antichrist” — though he revised the comment to “un-Christian.” ”
makes me think maybe he isn’t a total mushbag.
Also, it gets him out of the Senate, and maybe a better Democrat in.
Delicious: She “spent her post-college years as a Colorado ski bum”? Feh. How blandly pedestrian. It’s bad enough that that seems to fit, but it’s depressing. Nothing against skiing, but this ordinary-rich-girl stuff has a funny way of dullifying a person.
I spent my first post-college year as a struggling, underemployed Iowa poet. I got laid for the first time ever that year, so maybe there was something to it. I might have not been making any money, and I might have been living in an uninteresting part of the world, but at least I tried to be interesting.
You make me sad, Campbell.
A dated but interesting article about Detroit’s failure to see the writing on the wall for decades.
http://www.automobilemag.com/features/columns/0809_the_big_three_american_auto_companies/index.html
the Detroit bailout is on hold while President Bush “looks at the data.”
Why does this conjure up in my head the image of Bush sitting behind the Oval Office desk saying, “If th’ boy ain’t gud nuff ta be a data foah mah daughter, he ain’t gud nuff to git a bailout.”
Oh boo-hoo, the dude that ran out on the field at FedEx during the Cleveland game was probably beaten in custody.
MARCdMan: Yea, but he tipped the cops afterwards.
George will be fascinated by ‘the data’ right up to Jan. 20.
When Dick Cheney told Bush to “look at the data,” Bush probably checked the TiVo for Star Trek reruns.
I’m kidding, of course. Everyone knows Bush can’t work the TiVo.
Can’t help myself…
Thong Thwacker
Boot Bomber
Flat Flinger
Pump Popper
Tennie Thrower
Brogan Bopper
High Heel Heaver
Platform Propeller
Clog Clonker
A man named Salazar in the cabinet sends a clear message that B Hussein Obama is not a mere fluke and that people with who share their name with a dictator really can achieve anything they want. Only in America.
A Geek Tragedy: My friends Jim Hitler, Todd Stalin and Tyler Mussolini are going to be so happy to hear that!
I find it inconcievable that, in this age of politi….ohhhee….
huh?… gdgdfrrr…
NO.
BIAS.
NO.
BULL.
NO.
BIAS.
NO.
B