Wonkette
Have you been paying to the Minnesota Senate recount still, America? It’s still going on! We’d assumed that Al Franken had lost unofficially, and then the Illinois governor started being hilarious, and that was that. So, Jonathan Chait of TNR, what can you tell those of us who haven’t really been paying attention? “If you haven’t been paying attention to the Minnesota Senate race, it now looks very likely that Al Franken is going to win.” Hmm!
Chait references this analysis from Ron Fournier’s New Associated Press:
Of the 2.9 million votes already recounted, Coleman leads Franken by fewer than 200. But the AP’s analysis of the 3,500 challenges found that nearly 300 wouldn’t benefit either man because the voter clearly favored a third-party candidate or skipped the race.
The AP also found that of the 3,500 challenged ballots that easily could be assigned, Franken netted 200 more votes than Coleman. But Coleman has withdrawn significantly fewer ballot challenges than Franken — that is, the pool of challenges that can now be awarded to Franken is larger, and both campaigns announced Sunday that they would withdraw more challenges by Tuesday.
Do whatever math you want, nerds, but instead of counting ballots you should count lawyers, friggin’ legal operatives, man. Whoever has the most sleazy party operative lawyers in his stable will win. Recounts only exist for the sake of lawyers who are talented, but bored.
Jonathan Chait reaches conclusions very quickly.
Lawyers!
Minnesota Senate Recount Update [TNR]
Few real mysteries found in Minn. Senate ballots [AP]
paying the Minnesota Senate? NO THANKS
BULLSHIT. Lizard People will come out and win this thing. That is it. Election over. Lizard People win.
I badly want Al Franken in the senate, if only for the wingnut response. Watching Fox and Friends this morning was priceless. They were genuinely astonished that an Iraqui would want to throw a shoe at Jr. They seem to believe that we actually were greeted as liberators.
I keep trying to read these posts, but there’s a huge terrifying statue of Grendel that runs up and down the right side of the page and I can’t get rid of it. When I try to slide it out of the picture, it slides under the text. It follows me wherever I go. Oh mys!
Does being dressed like a Ninja Turtle keep AWAY the lizard people?
The term will be over before the recount is finished.
shortsshortsshorts: Another first this election cycle! First half-breed Muslins and now half-breed lizard/human hybrids. Its like Jurassic Park meets Mr. Smith Goes to Washington.
As Stalin said: He who counts the Lizards decides everything.
I’d love for Norm to loose just so I could count the seconds it would take for his wife to divorce him.
Neither of them deserve to be elected. Why not let Campbell Brown fill the seat?
Al Franken will steal this election, even if he has to count every damn vote to do it!
Does Minnesota have a Governor? If so, does he/she realize that they’re sitting on a GOLDEN FUCKING TICKET!!!!1
Aurelio:
That’s not Grendel. That’s Grendel’s mother. Alas, not shown naked in these pictures, unlike when Angelina Jolie played Grendel’s mother… sorta… if you count cartoon representations as being naked. ‘course I thought “Heavy Metal” was pretty hot at times.
Izzard people win? I always thought that was a given.
Is this Norm-Al, for a recount?
Get it, get it?
Where the hell is Nate Silver on this? He knows all things.
And by the way, Nate, yes, you were real good at predicting the election thingy, but that was six weeks ago. Now please take the fookin’ election graphs off your website already and replace them with Campbell Brown, like everyone else.
Does being a frog person count?
I hope and pray that the Governor of MN does the right thing and appoints Michelle Bachmann to the seat.
Aurelio: I know. It is totally FREAKING ME OUT, right now.
I wish we would have gotten the Georgia seat instead of the Minnesota seat. Franken AND Saxby Chambliss in the Senate? Hardy-har-har WTF.
must.have.more.Campbell.
At least the “submit box” covers Campbell Brown’s face.
You know, if I were a Republican, I’d be sick of Al Franken’s face. I mean he’s got one of those faces you just want to punch. But I’m a Democrat, so it’s all good.
SNL hasn’t been funny since….
i was at a party this past weekend and i mentioned that i would be willing to give liddy dole back her senate seat in exchange for franken to be in the senate and someone asked if the minnesota seat hadn’t already been decided and i answered no and everyone’s eyes sort of glazed over and there was a lull in the conversation.
my idol and favorite drag queen in the universe ann coulter has an absolutely undeciperable collumn on the minnesota race this past week for any masochists out there.
Stop bashing Campbell Brown, it takes real centrist roots and guts to take bold editorials like “Obama shouldn’t be mad when the media questions things” and “It’s sexist for Ed Rendell to say Janet Napolitano is good because she doesn’t have a family.” The partisan unimportant drivel Olbermann and O’Reilly spew is a problem fixed by Campby’s bland, unimportant, but INOFFENSIVE drivel.
Take Nasal Naomi out, please!!!!
Palin-Plumber2012: Campby’s bland, unimportant, but INOFFENSIVE drivel. The subtext is “Everything is OK, everything is OK, everything is OK….” And THEN she puts up this giant statue of herself all over Wonkette, just to scare everyone! I don’t understand this marketing strategery.
Scarab: /sign
There’s been one victory already…Wonkette retired the diaper picture! Some images burn a hole in the brain, and those brain cells don’t regenerate. That picture cost me.
What kinda name is “Campbell” for a chick, anyway? Aren’t they supposed to have names like “Jessica” and “Tiffany”?
Imagine the joy we would have if CNN merged with American Apparel.
ALERT! At the top of the page, in some states, Minnesota is Attacking Campbell Brown’s face!!!! Save Campbell Brown, abandon Wonkette!
If he loses, can I not pay the $50 campaign pledge that is on my credit card bill due December 23?
What is that a shoe-shield? A flattened trash can lid=US Army issue body armor?
So if Franken wins, does this signal a major turnaround in momentum for the 2010 elections?
Campbell has got to go. Or at least make the sidebar into a Flash game where we can undress her. Or dress her up like a tramp. Or throw shoes at her.
How’s about we declare this a tie and get Al and Norm to be co-Senators? It’d be like “Bosom Buddies” meets “West Wing.” Hilarity ensues! This sitcom writes itself…
CNN SKIN! thats hot.
Hmmm…I think Campbell Brown’s show would probably be more interesting if it actually did involve a bull. Why can’t she have a bull?!?! It could, you know, run people off the stage whenever they said something remotely akin to an actual political position…
I reckon it is just pointing out the obvious that if it comes down to lawyerin’, I would expect the jew to win.
What?
Oh, I am beginning to see the problem. BTW, I don’t think Campbell Brown even ran in the regular election, he shouldn’t be in the recount no matter how cute he is.
zetetic: I like Campbell. Since she is immovable, it would be really cool if she was animated and spoke the snark as we type.
So anyway, on topic,
What takes those Minnesota people so long to count? Garrison Keeler always droning on about how all the kids are above-average. God I hate Garrison Keeler.
That was so cool when Franken threw his shoes at Bush in Baghdad! That’s why we need more comedians in the Senate.
Aurelio: Wikipedia says her first name is “Alma” so you can see why she’s going with the middle name. Her ma’s maiden name apparently. Born in Looziana and all. Raised Catholic, first hubbies (first) name was honest-to-god “Peregrine” (makes “Campbell” sound downright normal) then converted to Judaism to marry the Faux News dingdong Senor.
Who knew?
We need Al in the Senate just for what it will do to Bill O’Reilly’s blood pressure and Ann Coulter’s hormone levels.
My mother always told me anyone could be a senator. If that idiot Franken wins I will know she was right.
If Franken is the answer, it must have been a very stupid question
Editors: MrNeutral is not funny, plz do something.