• May 26, 2012

Historians Already Sick of Obama Presidency

by Ken Layne  

Uh, dude, Superman is WHITE.The same mincing gaggle of Presidential Historians who impotently declared George W. Bush the Worst President Ever — which did exactly nothing to prevent him from serving a full eight years in the White House — have now decided uppity president-elect Barack Obama is a wildy presumptuous fantasist because he has referenced the godlike mustache-free Illinois president who caused the Civil War, Abe “Lincoln Logs” Lincoln.

The problem, according to the whiners at Politico, is that nutcase Obama isn’t referencing the usual second-rate nobody presidents favored by Ronald Reagan (who loved to compare himself to the socialist FDR) and Bill Clinton (who told everybody he was the second “cumming” of JFK and Thomas Jefferson, combined).

Obama’s frequent invocations of Abraham Lincoln — a man enshrined in myth and marble with his own temple on the National Mall — would not at first blush say much about his own instincts for modesty or self-effacement.

And now there are early rumblings of a backlash to Obama’s ostentatious embrace of all things Lincoln, with his not-so-subtle invitations to compare the 44th president to the 16th, the “Savior of the Union.”

So now all these Historians hate Barack Obama, who is sure to be America’s worst black president, so far.

Straw Man? Historians say Obama is no Lincoln [Politico]

{ 86 comments }

StephanieInCA December 15, 2008 at 12:56 pm

Maybe he will appoint Campbell Brown Secretary of Being Everywhere, All the Time?

Ooh, and then Margie Christoffersen can be the Whining & Bigotry Czar. Hott.

shortsshortsshorts December 15, 2008 at 12:57 pm

I was unaware that Abe Lincoln was a half-breed mooslim.

chaste everywhere December 15, 2008 at 12:58 pm

“All I know is he’s no Jack Kennedy. (Lincoln . . . he’s the guy we named the White House fuckpad after, yes?)”
the ghost of Peter Lawford

Borat December 15, 2008 at 12:58 pm

I’m trying to figure out what monument we’ll build to Hopey and where in DC it would go.

The only think I’ve decided is it shouldn’t be in that Greco-Roman style of the Capitol buildings and it shouldn’t be white marble.

jagorev December 15, 2008 at 12:59 pm

Politico is so insanely full of shit.

jagorev December 15, 2008 at 1:00 pm

[re=198807]Borat[/re]: I’m thinking giant black granite statute twice the length of the Washington Memorial

(too crude?)

WIDTAP December 15, 2008 at 1:00 pm

After all, if Obama cannot be craven, snide and cynical in his call for Americans to a higher cause than themselves, then he really wasn’t all that to begin with, was he.

Jim Newell December 15, 2008 at 1:01 pm

I want to know what Campbell Brown thinks about this.

mocowbell December 15, 2008 at 1:02 pm

If I hear the phrase “team of rivals” one more time I’m throwing my shoes at Chris Matthews and my socks at Doris Kearns Goodwin.

Deepthroat December 15, 2008 at 1:02 pm

Borat: I’m thinkin’ just paint the Washington monument brown?

WIDTAP December 15, 2008 at 1:03 pm

[re=198807]Borat[/re]:

I’m thinking since the pukes at NASA can’t be bothered to work with the new government that we tear down the old Air and Space Museum at the Mall and build Hopey’s monument on that site.

bitchincamaro December 15, 2008 at 1:03 pm

It’s not like Hopey’s about to sprout a Lincolnesque “chin-hugger”. He’s under my bus if he does, though.

Deepthroat December 15, 2008 at 1:03 pm

jagorev: you beat me to it! And yet, my computer clock still says 12:58. I blame this new president of ours.

problemwithcaring December 15, 2008 at 1:04 pm

Please. Abe only wishes he had this kind of commemorative plate swagger.

cal December 15, 2008 at 1:04 pm

Campbell Brown is invading my mind.

Oh and BTW – still the best photo of Hopey ever, the end.

cal December 15, 2008 at 1:05 pm

[re=198812]mocowbell[/re]: Call Chris Matthews a dog while you’re at it.

Deepthroat December 15, 2008 at 1:07 pm

CAMPBELL BROWN: No Bias. No Bull. No lips. Feel the excitment.

S.Luggo December 15, 2008 at 1:08 pm

If Barry is Abe, then Mitch McConnell can be fellow Kentuckian Mary Todd Lincoln.

NoWireHangers December 15, 2008 at 1:08 pm

Just for this wallpaper, I will NEVER watch any program starring Campbell Brown in any capacity. Ever.

Madeline December 15, 2008 at 1:08 pm

[re=198811]Jim Newell[/re]: Campbell Brown does not think. She only stares unceasingly with her unblinking and all-seeing eyes. The eyes! The eyes!

AngryBlakGuy December 15, 2008 at 1:09 pm

…lemme get this straight?! When “W” compares himself to Jesus that is fine, but when Obama refers to Lincoln its presumptuous?

JeffGoldblum December 15, 2008 at 1:11 pm

Can we impeach this shitty president yet, please?

NotNotLickingToads December 15, 2008 at 1:11 pm

A quick scan of today’s Politico headlines yields:

“Straw man? Historians say Obama no Lincoln.”

“Thunder Road: Likely EPA pick hit for Jersey record.”

“No Southerners yet in Obama Cabinet.”

So, out of six articles, half of them involve the failures of the Obama presidency at distributing affirmative action to the most conservative part of the country, at selecting Ralph Nader spliced with Al Gore to lead the EPA, and at eradicating slavery in the 1800s.

Anonymous Office Zombie December 15, 2008 at 1:12 pm

[re=198812]mocowbell[/re]:
Amen, brother. It’s a catch phrase circle jerk perpetuated by chattering idiots who you know haven’t even cracked the book.

Yawn. Politico and their outdated news commentary is sooo last second. I’m already in the process of declaring our next president’s tenure to be an overrated failure.

sati demise December 15, 2008 at 1:12 pm

When is wonkette going to storm the gates of Larry Johnsons ‘No Quarter’?

It is the wingnuttiest!
They are sure Barry is going to have to resign, right after Rahm gets thrown in jail for the Blago scandal.
Wing nut history at its finest!

SayItWithWookies December 15, 2008 at 1:13 pm

[re=198808]jagorev[/re]: Do the folks at Politico not realize that looking up to Lincoln (for which they provide two examples) is not the same as comparing oneself to Lincoln (which they accuse Obama of without providing one example)? I guess they’d prefer a president-elect who compared himself to Millard Fillmore and James Buchanan.
And I’m sure, were I to give a rat’s ass, a search of Politico’s archives would reveal a similar article deriding Dubya’s blatant comparisons of himself to Winston Churchill, Teddy Roosevelt and Harry Truman.

Campbell-on-CNN December 15, 2008 at 1:16 pm

[re=198811]Jim Newell[/re]: What do I think? I think Ken pretty much nailed it when he called the Politico gang “whiners.”

Yeah, yeah, sure. You got your website, you need to keep the content flowing, yada yada yada. But Politico ought to hand over the keys to the Wonkette eds and commentariat for a day (or better yet, a week), stand back and watch how it’s done.

You guys rock. Happy to be here.

fupduk December 15, 2008 at 1:17 pm

Not even close. Lincoln was a Log Cabin Republican.

shortsshortsshorts December 15, 2008 at 1:18 pm

[re=198847]Campbell-on-CNN[/re]: Love the show.
Will you please get nekked?

jagorev December 15, 2008 at 1:19 pm

Can we get a confirm from admins as to whether [re=198847]Campbell-on-CNN[/re] is actually posting from a CNN IP? Because I’d like to believe that she is a commenter here, just like I’d like to believe that Santa Claus lives at Macy’s.

Jollity December 15, 2008 at 1:19 pm

It’s fine as long as he gets a top hat.

Godot December 15, 2008 at 1:19 pm

[re=198829]AngryBlakGuy[/re]: More uppity than presumptuous.

Naked Bunny with a Whip December 15, 2008 at 1:21 pm

Yeah, what we really need in a president is the thing guys like Reagan and BushJr gave us: idiots with fake modesty.

Naked Bunny with a Whip December 15, 2008 at 1:23 pm

@shortsshortsshorts: That’s totally sexist and hawt.

Mr Blifil December 15, 2008 at 1:23 pm

Top Hat, spats, cane and lots of bling. Gonna be off the hook.

dotdotdotdotdot December 15, 2008 at 1:25 pm

[re=198853]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: Not on TV, mind. Just in the ad that is everywhere, all the time on Wonkette.

p-Sludge ofTheElves December 15, 2008 at 1:26 pm

[re=198829]AngryBlakGuy[/re]: People go to church by the millions and commune with Jesus every week. Quoting some historical dude? That’s just weird.

Doglessliberal December 15, 2008 at 1:26 pm

[re=198809]jagorev[/re]: how about a giant Black Power fist, with the middle finger raised…..

JeffGoldblum December 15, 2008 at 1:27 pm

This Campbell Brown post is the best post of the year.

p-Sludge ofTheElves December 15, 2008 at 1:28 pm

You know I used to think that this Campbell Brown ad was only on Wonkette. Now I realize it is everywhere – on every website. On every page. Smiling out from every pixel.

Kev-O-Tron December 15, 2008 at 1:28 pm

[re=198847]Campbell-on-CNN[/re]: Will you please stop eye fucking me while I’m at work? It’s grossly unprofessional.

p-Sludge ofTheElves December 15, 2008 at 1:30 pm

[re=198847]Campbell-on-CNN[/re]: Um, your highness. I left you cookys by the tree but you didn’t eated them yet. Do you havs a favrut kinda cooky? Also I’m sorry I looked awayz for a sec. It was a total axident.

BobLoblawLawBlog December 15, 2008 at 1:31 pm

[re=198804]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: And here I was gonna say I was unaware Barry was a big ‘mo.

Naked Bunny with a Whip December 15, 2008 at 1:33 pm

Smiling out from every pixel.

Campbell Brown’s beauty is a fractal.

problemwithcaring December 15, 2008 at 1:36 pm

[re=198853]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: Eww. She’s like 19 months pregnant now. Campbell, keep your clothes on. Just blow us all.

Kev-O-Tron December 15, 2008 at 1:37 pm

[re=198856]jagorev[/re]: Oh it’s true! And I hear that shortshortshorts is actually Michael Savage.

Doglessliberal December 15, 2008 at 1:37 pm

[re=198829]AngryBlakGuy[/re]: Bill O’Reilly compared himself to Jesus in an interview on Morning Edition the other day. It was unbelievable. Renee Montagne totally called him on it, too.

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=98060534

jagorev December 15, 2008 at 1:40 pm

I propose we replace the bespectacled “Wonkette” line-drawing on the masthead with Campbell Brown’s radiant visage.

bago December 15, 2008 at 1:42 pm

I see a white staff and I want to paint it black.

Min December 15, 2008 at 1:49 pm

Let he who is without cabinet appointment cast the first stone.

Enturbulate December 15, 2008 at 1:52 pm

I clickie on all the ads. I promise to always clickie. It’s good for our Wonkette to make munnies, but christ on a crutch, Giant CAMPBELL BROWN is just freaking me out! The, her, fughKL>c46wt&^%

Campbell-on-CNN December 15, 2008 at 1:53 pm

[re=198856]jagorev[/re]: Hey, why not? It’s all web 2.0 and such. I’ve been advised not to respond to any comments that are too, uh – provocative? My research describes Wonkette comenters as running the range from “politically astute” to “foulmouthed horndogs.” So show me your best side.

Also been advised to plug the show as much as possible.

Weeknights 8pm on CNN.

Hugs n’ kisses.

WadISay December 15, 2008 at 1:56 pm

[re=198847]Campbell-on-CNN[/re]: You are carrying demon Republican seed. If it’s a boy, name it Damien.

Aquannissiwamissoo December 15, 2008 at 1:58 pm

Obama: Shitty Black President or the Shittiest ???

DustBowlBlues December 15, 2008 at 2:00 pm

[re=198833]NotNotLickingToads[/re]: ““Straw man? Historians say Obama no Lincoln.”

WTF??? Politico is full of shit. I mean, historians are supposed to know about stuff AFTER it happens. When did they become fortune tellers?

jagorev December 15, 2008 at 2:00 pm

[re=198926]Campbell-on-CNN[/re]: Wonkette won’t let me post pictures, but here’s kind of how I feel right now:

http://p-userpic.livejournal.com/79309464/7312509

Lord BEEF December 15, 2008 at 2:01 pm

Maybe the show tagline should be “No Bias. No Bull. Just great hair. I mean, look at this hair, it’s fantastic”

Aquannissiwamissoo December 15, 2008 at 2:03 pm

For quality assurance purposes, a giant image of Campbell Brown may be monitoring this thread.

Delicious December 15, 2008 at 2:04 pm

Wow, advertising works.

DustBowlBlues December 15, 2008 at 2:04 pm

[re=198833]NotNotLickingToads[/re]: ““No Southerners yet in Obama Cabin”

I thought you guys were bad-mouthing Politico for criticizing Obama. Judging by the above story line, it’s clear that they are heaping praise on him. No southerners yet–if he continues to hold the line against including anyone south of the Mason-Dixon line, Lincoln will be eating his dust.

At least, that’s the way I read it.

jagorev December 15, 2008 at 2:07 pm

[re=198935]WadISay[/re]: Wait, there are powerful, wealthy Republicans who reproduce with women? No fricking way.

SayItWithWookies December 15, 2008 at 2:11 pm

[re=198959]DustBowlBlues[/re]: I hear Andrew Johnson is looking for work.

[re=198926]Campbell-on-CNN[/re]: All I want for Christmas is for you (or the real CB, no offense but who knows) to grill Rummy and/or Bush on that 530-page Congressional report laying the blame for torture squarely on their heads. Under harsh lighting and regardless of how many hours it takes to get the truth out. Not like their schedules are packed these days.

Thanks in advance,

SIw/W

shortsshortsshorts December 15, 2008 at 2:13 pm

[re=198953]Aquannissiwamissoo[/re]: WIN.

Campbell-on-CNN December 15, 2008 at 2:19 pm

[re=198972]SayItWithWookies[/re]: That would be a great Christmas gift for me too. We have some producers prepping just such a story, but don’t hold your breath on the participation of the alleged perps.

Oddly enough, they’ve been unresponsive to our invitations. Smells like chicken in here?

Hugs n’ kisses

8pm, CNN Weeknights.

Campbell-on-CNN December 15, 2008 at 2:21 pm

Well, this is fun but I’ve show to tape. Check back in a few hours if I can.

DustBowlBlues December 15, 2008 at 2:22 pm

This giant Campbell Brown image of giving me an inferiority complex. I could look like that if I didn’t have to wear a pirate eye patch over my (Please, please, please God) temporarily paralyzed face.

Shiver me timbers. This is the funniest thread the wonkerrati have had in ages, me mateys.

Naked Bunny with a Whip December 15, 2008 at 2:27 pm

I’ve show to tape

You have a show?! Why didn’t someone say so? If only there were some words accompanying your lovely visage that told me this, located someplace I would actually see them.

yellowdogdem December 15, 2008 at 2:29 pm

I only watch Rachel Maddow. Can somebody tell me about Campbell Brown? The only thing I can figure out is that she’s rich, ’cause poor people don’t name their female children “Campbell.”

Naked Bunny with a Whip December 15, 2008 at 2:29 pm

@DustBowlBlues: You tried whacking your face with a small piece of lumber? Works for my old TV.

Inadequate Blackmail December 15, 2008 at 2:31 pm

[re=198926]Campbell-on-CNN[/re]: “My research describes Wonkette comenters as running the range from “politically astute” to “foulmouthed horndogs.””

Ha. Sounds like you’ve been suitably briefed. And now, let us debrief you…

yellowdogdem December 15, 2008 at 2:38 pm

Arrgh! Am I gonna have to look at Campbell Brown’s huge image all week? I think I’d prefer bias and bull.

SayItWithWookies December 15, 2008 at 2:38 pm

[re=198992]Campbell-on-CNN[/re]: If that came to pass, you might just beat Lara Logan for my biggest wonk crush ever. Okay, I’m going to go stick my face in the ice machine for a few minutes before I pass out.

finallyhappy December 15, 2008 at 2:39 pm

[re=198814]WIDTAP[/re]: Tear down the NASA building- that is behind the Hirschhorn- leave the museums alone!

tiger December 15, 2008 at 2:41 pm

At least no one throws shoes at Hopey.

finallyhappy December 15, 2008 at 2:43 pm

[re=199013]yellowdogdem[/re]: Maybe they do- after poor people’s soup.

Czn939 December 15, 2008 at 2:45 pm

her teef are hawt ——->

Naked Bunny with a Whip December 15, 2008 at 2:54 pm

[re=199041]tiger[/re]: Panties, on the other hand…

WIDTAP December 15, 2008 at 3:01 pm

[re=198926]Campbell-on-CNN[/re]: “So show me your best side.”

Picture of man on stretcher with Oompa Lumpas and Furries in 3…2…1….

Come here a minute December 15, 2008 at 3:07 pm

[re=198926]Campbell-on-CNN[/re]: shameless self-promotion: ban-hammer time!

Wait, what? SHe’s payin da billz? Never mind….

Deepthroat December 15, 2008 at 3:25 pm

If that is, in fact, the real Campbell, I think she should announce that there is a big sale on TRUCKNUTZ on her show. You know, cause the people need to know.

bitchincamaro December 15, 2008 at 4:08 pm

I drove by CB one day in the west 30′s, she was walking on the construction sidewalk detour thingy, and I could have kidnapped her or run her down. I did neither. She lives, and it’s my fault.

slavojzizek December 15, 2008 at 6:24 pm

Presidential historians have roughly the same relation to actual historians as astrologers have to astronomers.

smellyal8r December 15, 2008 at 8:08 pm

So it’s official: Politico has run out of news 4-ever. Sheer idiocy. Srsly, Hopey should get himself a giant stovepipe hat for that train ride to DC. I notice he’s not coming all the way on the train from Springfield…that’s a little too close to Lincoln (who went home by train the same way, only, well…you know). Also, if anyone gives him tickets to anything at Ford’s Theatre, I’d say “pass”.

As to Campbell’s giant face on my screen, I suspect it’s keeping this website in business. Ya’ll know there’s a recession on, right? Media companies going bankrupt and laying off staff? Right?

tocute2btrue December 15, 2008 at 11:27 pm

I feel like a SLAVE .

MrNeutral December 16, 2008 at 8:24 am

I hear he’s going to walk across the reflecting pool after the inauguration.

“He can walk on water?”
No, he’s just such a lightweight and so full of hot air

mcfrady December 16, 2008 at 11:15 am

I’ve concluded that Politico is run by a bunch frustrated, right of center political wanna-bees, that couldn’t get their names on a ballot, much less elected anywhere. They lack qualifications to run for any office, so they take out their frustrations by appointing themselves arbiters of all things presidential. They follow where they believe the wind blows.

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