INDIGNANTS  4:40 pm December 12, 2008

George Bush Won’t Let Obama Into White House Early, Because WTF?

by Jim Newell

The tacky “new money” Obama family has insulted America by requesting early occupancy of the White House’s guest quarters, Blair House, so that his two children could start school on time (Jan. 5) at their fancy private gig. The White House has turned down the request because who are these fucking people?

CHICAGO—The White House has turned down a request from the family of President-elect Barack Obama to move into Blair House in early January so that his daughters can start school on January 5.

The Obamas were told that Blair House, where incoming presidents usually stay in the five days before Inauguration Day, is booked in early January, a spokesperson to the Obama transition said. “We explored the idea so that the girls could start school on schedule,’ the spokesperson said. “But, there were previously scheduled events and guests that couldn’t be displaced.”

It remained unclear who on Bushes guest list outranked the incoming President.

Perhaps the young princesses could stay with Uncle Dick Cheney at his house for a few weeks? Maybe he’d even let them “push the button!”

Sorry, We’re Booked, White House Tells Obamas [NYT]

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Woodwards Friend December 12, 2008 at 4:45 pm

Well in fairness, Bush did offer the Obama’s space in the White House servants quarters.

shortsshortsshorts December 12, 2008 at 4:45 pm

Dude, Barry, check Craigslist. There is NO WAY you can find anywhere to stay in D.C. for Obama’s inauguration. …oh wait. what?

ManchuCandidate December 12, 2008 at 4:46 pm

Jeez, W. Why make the Hopey = Jeebus allegory stronger? Next thing we know, we will be hearing about a new star to the east and visits by three wise men.

ToeCramps December 12, 2008 at 4:48 pm

Why don’t Dubya let Osama stay in the West Wing and let Hopey & Co stay at Blair? Count on Booosh to be an asshole to the very end!

Packherd December 12, 2008 at 4:48 pm

“Push the button”? That is TERRIBLE innuendo, Newell! How do you sleep an night?

Kev-O-Tron December 12, 2008 at 4:48 pm

There he goes getting all “uppity” again. When will those people ever figure it out?

Vanity Smurf December 12, 2008 at 4:49 pm

This has Laura’s passive aggressive fingerprints all over it.

ManchuCandidate December 12, 2008 at 4:49 pm

“Mr Cheney, why does the button look like a chocolate starfish?”

pepe December 12, 2008 at 4:50 pm

Has Barry “fancy pants” Obama never heard of the Holiday Inn? Or maybe even a Residence Inn. It’s only 2 weeks… christ.

SayItWithWookies December 12, 2008 at 4:51 pm

[re=197808]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Wise men coming to DC. Hah.

4tehlulz December 12, 2008 at 4:52 pm

>>It remained unclear who on Bushes guest list outranked the incoming President.

The Saudi royal family is always a good guess.

AngryBlakGuy December 12, 2008 at 4:54 pm

…maybe he can stay at the Mayflower with Laura Bush?

Vanity Smurf December 12, 2008 at 4:54 pm

Hilz doesn’t have a spare room or two at the manse?

arf December 12, 2008 at 4:54 pm

A long time ago there was another family in need of a place to stay on a cold winter night, a husband and his wife, heavy with child. They were turned away from every inn and home, and had to bunk down in a manger among the beasts. A star shined brightly above them, and when the baby was born, he was totally in a good school district.

Gopherit December 12, 2008 at 4:54 pm

[re=197808]ManchuCandidate[/re]: I guarantee you won’t see 3 Wise Men near the white House until after the Obamas move in.

Texan Bulldoggette December 12, 2008 at 4:54 pm

Maybe W was afraid Barry would steal the silverware, leer at Laura & stock the fridge full of Schlitz Malt Liquor.

arf December 12, 2008 at 4:55 pm

[re=197808]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Damn, beat me to it. Y’all are fast.

MARCdMan December 12, 2008 at 4:55 pm

Sidwell Friends students, arriving for their first day from a hotel? Oh the shame of it.

Rush December 12, 2008 at 4:56 pm

This is a lame attempt on Barry’s part to catch up to the number of homes that McCain has if you ask me.

AngryBlakGuy December 12, 2008 at 4:56 pm


…well I’m bringing the frankincense so on of you can bring the myrrh.

liberaltruthsayer December 12, 2008 at 4:57 pm

I wonder if the Blair House has been set up as “Shredderville” where all documents implicating this administration in criminal activity go. Before Bush pardons the whole lot.

4tehlulz December 12, 2008 at 4:58 pm

[re=197826]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: I don’t think he’d care as long as Barry passes him a 40.

rocktonsammy December 12, 2008 at 5:00 pm

W hasn’t yet changed the “whites only” signs on the white house rest room doors.

WagTehGod December 12, 2008 at 5:01 pm

I hear Fred Thompson’s pad is available for the way wrong price.

putinontheritz December 12, 2008 at 5:07 pm

Cheney’s Button is our epoch’s Pandora’s Box. Small children will be ‘reading’ (with their mind wands) 4-d illustrated versions of this story in 4008.

Kev-O-Tron December 12, 2008 at 5:08 pm

[re=197831]AngryBlakGuy[/re]: I’ll bring the weed.

sevenrepeat December 12, 2008 at 5:10 pm

Who is this Obama person?

SayItWithWookies December 12, 2008 at 5:10 pm

[re=197831]AngryBlakGuy[/re]: Taken care of. David Plouffe already sent me an email saying I’d get an inaugural commemorative tote bag if I contribute in two or more ounces of myrrh.

guangho December 12, 2008 at 5:12 pm

Next thing you know, Obama will want to drink from the faucet instead of the garden hose.

Hedley Lamar December 12, 2008 at 5:14 pm

My upstairs is available, but only if he agrees to prosecute shrub for war crimes and such.

obfuscator December 12, 2008 at 5:17 pm

[re=197838]WagTehGod[/re]: The girls would be disturbed by the adult sized diaper changing station next to the infant sized diaper changing station.

effinHel December 12, 2008 at 5:24 pm

Well, the story actually got it wrong… The Obama’s could stay, they were just directed to use the back door… Jeesh some time those people are just to uppity for their own good!

Numbat Dundee December 12, 2008 at 5:25 pm

[re=197808]ManchuCandidate[/re]: But if you carry the allegory through he’ll have to visit Egypt to avoid being murdered by Herod/Cheney. Whereas Cheney actually sends the people he wants to tourture to Egypt for free.

Larry McAwful December 12, 2008 at 5:30 pm

I can understand the Bushes’ wanting to hold on. It’s going to be something like forty years before anyone lets another Republican anywhere near the White House, so they might as well enjoy it while they still can.

Guppy06 December 12, 2008 at 5:30 pm

It’s “Bush‘s guest list!” Grammar Nazi SMASH!

How well does copy editing pay over at the Times, anyway?

Numbat Dundee December 12, 2008 at 5:34 pm

He sends the people he wants to torture there as well.

p-Sludge ofTheElves December 12, 2008 at 5:34 pm

I already got people staying there who GAVE me millions, instead of COSTING me millions IF YOU DON’T MIND!

populucious December 12, 2008 at 5:34 pm

My Mother has a small place in McLean where she would, I’m sure, be happy to put the new First Family up, as long as they don’t mind sleeping on her adorable collection of fold up couches, beds and air mattresses.

She does work so they’d need to either rent a car or get themselves Metro passes to get themselves into the city every day. She can’t be taxiing people all over the place. She’s also not going to be cooking for people all the time, so just know that. It’s help yourself or go hungry. They’re welcome to watch the teevee, but please don’t erase any of her HGTV shows. (Those Design on a Dime folk are so clever!) Also, if they’re around on Sunday, they will be expected to attend church with her, because really, it’s a nice thing, and what does it hurt you to make a Mother happy?

Also, they’ll need to clear out by January 16th, because that’s when all her guests coming in for the Inauguration start arriving. Apologies if that’s inconvinient, but who leaves planning a trip to DC THIS January to the last minute like that?

Min December 12, 2008 at 5:35 pm

Is the Lincoln Bedroom available?

Neon Trotsky December 12, 2008 at 5:39 pm

I hear the Obamas are having a hard time finding a room for the Inauguration too since it’s in such high demand…

cal December 12, 2008 at 5:43 pm

The Bush Twins have booked the place for a totally bitchin’ beer pong marathon.

problemwithcaring December 12, 2008 at 5:54 pm

Laura recommended the YWCA on Rhode Island and thinks it will fine for the likes of the Obamas.

“And like so many of the people from the Chicago area, they, you know, were underprivileged anyway,” she said, “so this is working very well for them.”

HomoElectus December 12, 2008 at 6:22 pm

you know the staffer who actually got to tell obama camp “no” on something actually came in his or her pants.

Ms. Warsaw December 12, 2008 at 6:32 pm

Comfort Inn

Holiday Inn Express

azw88 December 12, 2008 at 6:38 pm

[re=197815]pepe[/re]: Barry and Michelle are OK wit da cheepy hotels, hostels, and such, it is those prickish gov’ment dudes and dudettes that will only stay at the top-notch places. Secret Service guys are such spoiled pricks, they are willing to take a bullet for a brother, but unwilling to sleep on anything but pure satin sheets.

WindbagCity December 12, 2008 at 6:41 pm

[re=197808]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Well, it’s not quite a manger, but they should check with the nuclear protest lady in Lafayette Park to see if she has room in her tent.

S.Luggo December 12, 2008 at 7:01 pm

Saxby Chambliss has offered to put up the Obamas in his wood pile.

One Yield Regular December 12, 2008 at 7:02 pm

Those Bushes sure were quick to cash in on renting out the place for the inauguration.

But frankly, why would the Obamas WANT to stay in this house? I saw the movie. It’s out in the middle of the Maryland woods, all run down, with handprints all over the walls, and there was this lost college kid, Josh, standing in the corner of the basement, facing the wall, then whap, the lights went out and the film ended, but somebody found the video camera.

wickedlittledoll December 12, 2008 at 7:20 pm

Maybe they should camp out on the front lawn. Perhaps Barney will join ‘em if they’re lucky

Winsome December 12, 2008 at 7:38 pm

[re=197967]One Yield Regular[/re]: That was actually rather funny, thanks.

mistahkurtz December 12, 2008 at 7:46 pm

A pox on all of them.

mistahkurtz December 12, 2008 at 7:47 pm

And Barry, go get your shinebox.

Servo December 12, 2008 at 8:06 pm

If it’s for Cheney’s guests, it’s then referred to as the Blair Witch House.

Servo December 12, 2008 at 8:15 pm

[re=197967]One Yield Regular[/re]:
Read others’ comments first, Servo. Dumbass!

Pop Socket December 12, 2008 at 9:24 pm

It remained unclear who on Bushes guest list outranked the incoming President.

Uh, anybody. There is a little known “no Socialist Muslim Kenyans” clause in the deed covenants. Nobody complained before because, like, what were the odds?

Hutch December 12, 2008 at 9:24 pm

I liked Barney Frank’s observation that Barry has been grossly overestimating the number of current presidents (there’s only one president at a time?). Throw da bum’s out and just move into the White House. The Bushes, such as they are, can stay at the Holiday Inn Express.

finallyhappy December 12, 2008 at 10:05 pm

My house- extra bedrooms, big screen Tv, Fios, wireless internet. I can’t promise meals because I work but they can eat my stock of granola bars and cereal(name brand – none of this cheap stuff for the future First family)- there are Chinese and Pollo carryouts near by. They can even use my car- I’ll take the bus. No one will suspect it is them in the crappy old toyota. Where do I send my address?

WithMySFValues December 12, 2008 at 10:46 pm

May I volunteer my parents’ house in Arlington? Spare bedroom, golf course views, Mom will toast you a bagel in the morning. Since I came out, I have fought over nothing more intensely with my mother than Barry v. Hillary (I favored Our Lady of the White Water, she was for Barryz despite her fear of blacks/gangstas), so they can bloody well put up the Obamas for a couple weeks, nuff said?

S.Luggo December 12, 2008 at 10:50 pm

“A pox on them all.”
Not exactly analytical, outside of being a snark fail. E.g.:

The signers of the Declaration of Independence.
— A pox on them all.

The 12 Apostles.
— A pox on them all.

The American Enterprise Institute.
— A pox on them all.
On second thought, excluding the word “all”, one might have a point. (See the Waffen SS assault on Stalingrad.) I trust that I have made myself obscure.

Jesse in Japan December 12, 2008 at 11:03 pm

He’s just making sure those colored kids don’t get any edumacation, that’s all.

Magginkat December 12, 2008 at 11:21 pm

Tacky Shrub, Tacky! Wonder what excuse he will use on January 20?

TexasCowGirl December 12, 2008 at 11:23 pm

[re=197808]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Boy I tell ya, Jesus comes back and a wingnut who claims to love him tells him there’s no room at the inn! Well that’s what happens when you’ve been brainwashed into believing that Jesus was white.

Mr Blifil December 12, 2008 at 11:32 pm

I don’t suppose this has anything to do with the 458 office shredders and the 17 wood chippers that were loaded into Blair House under cover of the night a few weeks ago…

davesnothere December 13, 2008 at 1:01 am

[re=197811]Packherd[/re]: I think he meant “pull the finger.”

schvitzatura December 13, 2008 at 2:01 am

[re=198041]S.Luggo[/re]: Ersatz Waffen SS assault across the Volga (or was it Don)?

greengou2 December 13, 2008 at 2:45 am

Booked for whom…some last minutes visitors….Saudis….holding hands.

President elect Obama’s girls are our first daughters, they should be treated with dignity and respect, any how it is always Ritz-Carlton in DC, Malia and Sasha would love the cookies.

greengou2 December 13, 2008 at 2:48 am

[re=197804]Woodwards Friend[/re]:

President elect Obama’s girls are our first daughters, they should be treated with dignity and respect, any how it is always Ritz-Carlton in DC, Malia and Sasha would love the cookies.

greengou2 December 13, 2008 at 2:50 am

President elect Obama’s girls are our first daughters, they should be treated with dignity and respect, any how it is always Ritz-Carlton in DC, Malia and Sasha would love the cookies.

Mojopo December 13, 2008 at 2:56 am

This is an Obamanation!

Mojopo December 13, 2008 at 3:01 am

Why in the hell should Barack and Michelle have to work around Bush? Find me more than 10 people who will be appalled if Obama walks into the White House and throws Bush’s clothes out the damn window. Let Bush pitch a tent on the South Lawn until the 19th if he’s going to be a dick about this.

Purple Tide December 13, 2008 at 4:26 am

The Blair House has spent the last 8 years as a Republican gay sex S&M dungeon. Crist, Foley, Craig, Haggard, Mehlman, Hastert— it’s gonna take at least 3 months to get the Santorum out of the carpet and perhaps a century to exorcise the greasy scrote-stain demons from Karl Rove’s felching couching.

Purple Tide December 13, 2008 at 4:28 am

Dammit, I meant felching couch. Total Blago moment.

Borat December 13, 2008 at 5:51 am

Doesn’t Barry still keep that studio arpartment in DC he wrote about in his book? What’s wrong with that?

sezme December 13, 2008 at 9:56 am

Barry, MIchelle and the girls can stay in a dormitory room at George Mason University while George kicks out the little-boy harem at Blair house. Unless the administration finds out, and then – hilarity ensues! Check out There’s a President in my Dorm Wednesday nights at 7:30 on NBC!

Robobot December 13, 2008 at 10:51 am

Barry and kin are more than welcome to respond to our Inauguration Special and sublet out our UMD partyhouse for ~$1.5k a night until the Whitehouse is free.

Special amenities include a semi-functional everything, two angry Republicans who live upstairs, lots of attention from the kind and racially unbiased PG County police department, and a neighbor who call the cops on us for obscure zoning violations every time a black person comes over.

It will be great practice for in the Whitehouse.

btabs December 13, 2008 at 1:15 pm

I assume Lindsey Graham runs an elegant Bed & Breakfast somewhere. Would that be too awkward?

TexasCowGirl December 13, 2008 at 1:19 pm

Now Barry has to investigate all of the Bush Administrations crimes on general principle. Bad move Dubya, bad move.

TeddyS December 13, 2008 at 1:33 pm

This low-class snub will come back to haunt the Bushies.

Murphious December 13, 2008 at 8:02 pm

So what if they can’t let the Obama family into an official “guest house” early. I am pretty sure someone in D.C. needs some favor and will offer them free rooms…Does our soon-to-be ex-guv Rod Blowmebit*h know any hoteliers in the area? (punny last name courtesy of a buddy of mine who coined it after Rod won his first term here in Illinois)

ivenson December 13, 2008 at 11:11 pm

OK, Barry, I think we’re ready to do business. You can stay with me in lovely Herndon, VA…home of a new VW plant AND home to many immigrants. Our local govt shut down our controversial (to idiots) day-laborer center. You could maybe make a speech about that!

Also, I could take you out for some New Mexico style enchiladas at Anita’s (or Tortilla Factory if you want to be all uppity). We got Korean groceries where you can point to the eel you want in the tank and they catch it fresh.

Best of all, if you have a good traffic day, the 20 minute drive into DC should only take you an hour or so.

Unless it’s raining, or the sun is shining brightly…then it’s like 90 minutes on 66E.

Si se puede!

Jukesgrrl December 13, 2008 at 11:53 pm

[re=198093]Purple Tide[/re]: Not to mention the Captain Morgan vomit stains left there by the twins.

wickedlittledoll December 14, 2008 at 12:03 am

Low-class? The Bushes? Where on earth could you get a crazy idea like that!?

glamourdammerung December 14, 2008 at 1:09 am

[re=197815]pepe[/re]: Do you really think the Secret Service is going to let Obama stay in a Motel Six or other spot that is easily accessible with nice large glass windows once could fire weapons through?

artbot2000 December 14, 2008 at 4:19 am

Just for that, dough butt, no last little trip on US One. You and the first frau can fly commercial back to Dallas/whatever. Maybe unka Dick will loan the use of his Gulfstream.

And as a further temporary pre-whitehouse residential thought: how about the Potomac?

Captain Swing December 14, 2008 at 6:34 am

Stoopid, ignorant… I suppose we shouldn’t have been surprised that George The Dumber just had to add ungracious to the list before he and his miserable claque hauled ass.

President Elect Obama should hire the most expensive hotel room in Georgetown for Sasha and Malia for the week, tell them it’s OK to invite all their new school mates, their parents, and the teachers back for dinner every night, put it all on the tab, then send Dubya the bill.

Luckily for Bush-the Soon-to-be-Departed, the incoming President and First Lady have way too much class to do that, and give the impression that they would not allow their daughters to become overindulged brats, unlike some others we could mention…

Paul Tardy December 14, 2008 at 12:00 pm

Milking that civil service job right to the end. You go W. Looks like there’s still some fumes left of Bush’s political capital (in the capitol). Did I get the difference between capital and capitol right, anyway. Why can’t the Obamas stay in that secret bomb shelter the congress built so they can still debate the future of America even if there is a nuclear war. I bet the youngest, and her little school friends would just love it. The older one might have outgrown underground bomb shelters, but I think the little lady will just love the nearby, actually just above, Greenbrier hotel and young girl fantasy palace. If the “Secret emergency relocation center” is also booked up, who knows with these Bush people, Mount Weather and the mysterious ‘Site R’ might also work in a pinch. The girls might have to be bussed to school by helicopter. I think landing on the Sidwel’s soccer pitch in a $400M VH-71 Kestrel would put the Obama girls in good stead with the cool kids. Actually a VH-71 is a flying RV, so maybe they could stay in the helicopter until the Bushs are safely out of sight and out of mind.

Dreckster December 15, 2008 at 12:51 pm

Who has it booked? I checked and it turns out it’s God. Tired of all the evening teleconferences, plus, what with his main man leaving office, needed to get some face time in.

BobLoblawLawBlog December 15, 2008 at 1:40 pm

Dubya’s a tool. Next.

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