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Wonkette hope-troll operative “Xavier” sends us this question that appears (or at least appeared briefly) on the humorless intellectual black snob website, Change.gov. Finally, some red meat from that trashy nerd emporium! But no, WALNUTS!, you cannot be president.

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69 COMMENTS

  1. “Is it true that John McCain died in late September and his reanimated corpse was puppeteered through the remainder of the campaign just to provide the people with a consistent reason to vote for the opposition?”

  2. [re=196054]persiflage[/re]: Not just illiterate, but ignorant as well. Any voiding would be done on conviction, not impeachment.

    Change.gov allows wingnuts but not TRUCKNUTZ? Ladies and gentlemen, is this America?

  3. [re=196054]persiflage[/re]: There should be a box to check where the people with half a brain get to determine if the questioner gets to stay in the US or gets shipped off to Siberia for a lovely wintertime vacay.

  4. Here is a compilation of all the things Barry has been referred to by the wingnuts:

    Barack-Hussain-Nazi-Fascist-Terrorist-Socialist-Communist-British-Uppity-Elitist-Bottomfeeding-Osama-NoObama.

    When you put the name all together in context, doesn’t it start to ALL MAKE SENSE?

  5. freakishlystrong: I believe that is the original, “natrual” spelling, favored by traditional fundamentalists on most ranches south of the Alleghenies…

  6. Shouldn’t it be SCOTUSA and POTUSA? I mean, not to be a stickler or anything but the official name of the country IS “United States of America”. And if you’re enough of a dickhead to use things like “POTUS” or “SCOTUS”* then shouldn’t you go all the way?

    *political and legal reporters exempted, as otherwise their fingers might fall off with how often they type that shit out.

  7. Actually, I’m fairly impressed that this site exists and that they manage to keep Bozos like us off it. (I would never join any club that would have me as a member, bla, bla, bla)

    They must have a sizable crew of literate people who are actually reading the comments and thinking about them for a second. It is an internet first.

  8. NoWireHangers: Thanks, I always thought that was SCROTUP, as in “Honey, now that we’re all SCROTUP, how will we ever disentangle….?”

  9. I said some things that weren’t even remotely offensive and my comments were magically blown out of the room like a cannon.

    Surely you meant “blown like a black man in a florida restroom”.

  10. As an aside, I believe this nation can be significantly improved by a companion product to TruckNutz. Yes, I’m talking about TruckButtz! See…you get some plastic hineys…

  11. [re=196066]dougbob[/re]: Might as well make it the new Siberia, W sure won’t be going there anytime soon. He’ll be clearing brush in North Dallas and Patagonia (=South Dallas).

  12. Are you at all concerned that when it comes out that your real father and mother were killed in the destruction of Krypton, that your wife and children may be at risk of attack from Bizzaro-Obama?

  13. Are you concerned that after it is discovered that your bowels were voided before inauguration, any tuxedos or other rentals you may have made – in – will be rendered indefatigable?

  14. Are you concerned about your repressed homosexual tendancies and the possibility of being discovered sucking cock in the truckstop bathroom? Do you wake in the middle of the night clutching your bits and curling into the fetal position and crying for Jebus? Are you worried that you will be caught eating boogers one fateful afternoon at your auto parts job in the TRUCKNUTZ section? If a tree falls on your trailer will a bear in an alternate universe shit on your favorite Blue Collar Comedy DVD ?

    The answer to these and other thrilling questions in next week’s episode of SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!

  15. [re=196134]TGY[/re]: If someone starts selling TruckButtz, won’t the next step be the front-mounted BumperDick? It would give a whole new meaning to the phrase “rear-ended”.

    Seriously, this anthropomorphizing of motor vehicles must stop before our cars start spreading disease through anal car sex, and demanding the right to marry each other.

  16. [re=196086]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: My favorite wingnut characterization of Barry was “this shallow, ignorant, self-absorbed man…” I forgot which dickwad said it, but I think it was in the WaPo.

  17. [re=196060]FreshCliches[/re]: It is not the America that we know and love.

    [re=196145]WadISay[/re]: That’s because you failed to sign your question “Your Next Secretary of State”.

    [re=196043]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: Changeyness.gov will not be useful
    until it has a search engine that will allow one to find important questions such as:
    “If you move to a fortified compound in Wyoming, will you be beyond US jurisdiction? – Dick C.”
    “Can a President-elect grant someone a full pardon, you fucking asshole? – Rod B.”
    “Bro’? – JJ Jr.”

  18. [re=196241]S.Luggo[/re]: “Am a an insane lunatic?” -O.J. Simpson

    The Change website would probably be more effective if it was run by an ‘merican sitzin and not a British Kenyan.

  19. Hey, by John the Blogger’s reasoning about “illegitimate presidents,” the last eight years have all been a dream. Sort of like “Dallas” in the 80s, when J.R. wasn’t really shot.

    Dude’s old.

  20. Good questions are starting to show up, finally ([sic] on spellings):

    Will you allow the press to review the contents of your Blackberry and to read your emails to support you claim you knew nothing about the Govn of Ill. attempting to sell your senate seat? tom, st louis

    I’m going to go with a “no” on that one, Tom.

    Why won’t you give any details about your trip to Pakistan in 1981? … Were you searching for your identity? Were you just visiting your Pakistani roommate’s family? – Paul, San Antonio, TX

    Duh, Paul, he was fighting the Rooskies in Afghanistan. Didn’t you see Charlie Wilson’s War??

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