Wonkette
- Instead of fixing Florida’s terrible economy, Charlie Crist spent a quarter of a million dollars in sunny Madrid, including $1,300 on a minibar tab, presumably immediately preceding sex with his fiance, a known woman. [Andrew Sullivan]
- Mark Begich, who is from Alaska and is neither Trig nor Ted Stevens so why would you know who this is?, doesn’t want to send Stevens, whom he beat in last month’s Senate race, to jail. [TPMMuckraker]
- President Bush is thinkin all profound-like. “I’m just a simple President,” he tells Cynthia McFadden. [ABC News]
- The mystery of “Senate Candidate #5″ is like that of “Client-9″ but with fewer whore diamonds (because of the recession.) [Marc Ambinder]
- Fran Drescher, whom you might remember hating on teevee programs like The Nanny, would like Hillary Clinton’s old gig as a Senator. [CNN Political Ticker]
If Fran was in the Senate and we needed to whip up a few more votes, she could just threaten people by speaking to them.
“I’m just a simple [in the sense of simpleton] President” would be the most self-aware thing he has ever said (besides that his proudest moment was catching that 8-lb fish down in a Texas lake). But, sadly, that is not what he meant. Who the hell knows what he meant, but it was not that.
$1300.00 for the minibar??!!?? Goddamn macadamia nuts have gotten outrageously expensive!
NoWireHangers: You have made the funny today.
NoWireHangers: “Drescher: Putting Nasal To Work for You!”
I would totally vote for Fran, if only for the PPV mud wrestling match with Sarah Palin over who has the most annoying voice in the Senate.
$1,300 at a minibar? So that’s like what, two bags of peanuts and a bottle of water? Big deal.
I bet that $1300 included the pay-per-view gay porn he rented to get himself in the mood for sex with the known woman.
Senator Schmenator! HANANHANHANHANHANHANHANHANH x 1000!
I hate it when the MSM refers to The Orange One as “wildly popular”, we loathe him down here.
Apparently J.J. Junior is Senate Candidate # 5
That’s 5 Blag diamonds.
I thought the point was to fill Hillz’ Senate seat with something less shrill and annoying?
Charlie Crist needs 9 ‘bodyguards’? Seriously?
There are just too many places to attack that I just don’t know where to start. If the guy walked around in Europe with Sunglasses people would just think he’s some orange american tourists (wearing the sneakers, LL Bean backpack and really brightly colored jacket (with whatever football team they have in FL)).
How many of those were bodyguards vs. male attendants, butlers, and the guy who has the coke. Unless we are talking Canaan Banana, my 1st favorite president from Zimbabwe would would rape the guys who were supposed to take a billet for him.
TSG is saying Emil Jones is
ClientSenate Candidate #5.State money was not used to pay for Crist’s roughly $30,000 in expenses. Business executives who went on the trip picked up that bill…
Beholden to no one, Crist-style.
When our leaders believe that all life on earth today floated in a ark for 40 days this is where we end up.
Re: Blago.
The brother never gets the sex in the sex scandal.
“the Nanny” in the US Senate?? Not no, but HELL NO!! Can you imagine having to listen to THAT voice on the senate floor, in press conferences, and on Meet the Press?? Talk about a ratings killer!
NO ONE wants to listen to that voice, that is why they made her some special envoy to the old eastern bloc countries. Why? because we hate their sorry asses and wanted THEM to have to listen to her fucking voice for hours! (and if they agreed to any treaties/agreements just to get her to shut the hell up, hey EPIC WIN!!!)
Though she could be powerful, “vote for my bill or I’ll laugh throughout my speech.” Her bills would pass 99-0 (McCain is never there to vote)
Because the only thing more annoying than listening to people talk about obscure pieces of legal code is when they do it with Fran Drescher’s voice.
Borat: Yeah, no-one in Europe would know who the guy is, or care even if they did. It’s not as if he looms like a Colossus over the European zeitgeist.
Still though, those 9 bodyguards probably saved him from having his camera nicked on the Champs-Élysées, so the $148,000 spent represents real savings, right there.
Bodyguards is a republican euphemism for Sexslave…..
I think they should just have a lottery to fill both Hillary’s and Barack’s Senate seats.
I mean, could you really end up with someone worse than a lot of those asswipes that are there now?
Borges would be proud.
Bypartizoa: yeah, now his daddy is gonna want to cut Obama’s balls off, since he didn’t want his son in the Senate…..
$8,000 for roundtrip airfare
$1300 to liquor us a few
sexslavesbodyguardsthe buttsecks in several European cities on other people’s $$, PRICELESS!
A blind man like Gov. Paterson would only be able to judge Fran Drescher by her voice.
Bah, Fran Drescher is 100% sexy.
When you say “Mark Begich” don’t you mean “some random warm blooded democratic mammal”?
sex with his fiance, a known woman
That’s “fiancee,” although with Charlie “Is a Veep job open? I’m engaged!” Crist, I can understand the confusion.
NoWireHangers: Yes, but since nobody knows who the fuck Emil Jones is, we will continue to think of Candidate #5 as Jesse Jackson, Jr., for the sake of the narrative.
Reality is way overrated.
No, no no… It was $1300 for a mini-SKIRT.
wheelie: I mean seriously, I’ve met members of ruling families who don’t use bodyguards (so long as I’m the one with my back to the door). And this guy needs 9?? This requires some serious probing (umm, and that’s what we’ll probably find out is behind this)
gjdodger: I always thought it was fiancé for a guy or fiancée, if the affianced was a woman.
[ pronounced FAG-hag ]
“Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I’m just a president. Your world frightens and confuses me! Sometimes the honking horns of your traffic make me want to get out of my Motorcade and run off into my ranch, or wherever. Sometimes when I get a message on my internets, I wonder: “Did little demons get inside and type it?” I don’t know! My primitive mind can’t grasp these concepts.”
Bush is Unfrozen Caveman President!
Crist: And $320 on electric fans to keep him cool while giving speeches
Does he have some kind of sweating problem?
Also, if y’all get Al Franken, I want Fran Drescher.
And why would Charlie friggin Crist even NEED all those bodyguards? It’s not like anyone in Europe knows him. Sheeeeesh.
sanantonerose: In case all those lascivious Europeans would want to make the sexy times with him on the spot. A hawt Governor has the right to defend himself from their randy advances. Orange is a big turn-on over here, trust me.
Charlie was just trying to get her drunk so he could head to the gay bars. The problem is she needs to swallow a lot of hooch to forget what she got herself into
freakishlystrong: I agree, his ass sucks wind
Goddamn you, Miss Weiner, for implying that the sun here in Madrid is conducive to spending a lot of money…unless you have to warm your frozen fingers with top shelf liquor…and your frozen Linus. If you are a cold, cold homo. Who has to has sex with someone who’s not on “Prison Break.”
azw88: Actually, I’d be curious to hear how she squeaks in bed.