bile

‘Thank You George W. Bush’ Webmaster Furiously Scrubbing Site

You anti-American homosexual Muslim book-skimming ACORNs have taken YET ANOTHER perfectly good & respectable website — this one designed to thank George W. Bush for the various wars and contracting economies — and ruined it with your filthy jokes about butts and poop. The site’s webmaster is now having to scrub your PUERILE CRAP petition signatures at a breakneck pace leaving him/her no time for SELF-PLEASURE. Let’s check out some of these toilet-humor “names” from you people who only want John Kerry to run the country and nothing else will do.

  • #952: The entire 1985 Dever Broncos.
  • #958: Ollie Tabooger
  • #965: lord voldemort
  • #967: An hero
  • #972: Ol PP McPperton
  • #987: Bush sucks big donkey dicks
  • #1003: homer sekchal

The number of petition signers is vacillating between 990 and 1,030, depending on how quick the webmaster is. There are also a lot of libtards there whining about torture and the Patriot Act and divisive politics… lame. Just make your dick joke and move on.

[TYPGWB]

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About the author

Jim Newell is Wonkette's beloved Capitol Hill Typing Demon. He joined Wonkette.com in 2007, left for some other dumb job in 2010, and proudly returned in 2012 as our "Senior Editor at Large." He lives in Washington and also writes for things such as The Guardian, the Manchester paper of liberals.

View all articles by Jim Newell

Hola wonkerados.

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217 comments

  1. NoWireHangers

    Ooooh, there are some GOOD ones:

    1074 I like Bush, but I LOVE it shaved.

    1081 Buttram LaDouche

    1062 Ceiling cat was watching you fuck up the country.

    868 Dr. Truck Nutz

    899 Hugh G. Rection

    771 Furries

  2. norbizness

    I would have forgotten 9/11 in early 2003 had it not been for the GOP. P.S. I signed up as “All-White Neighborhood”

  3. ManchuCandidate

    I am so deeply ashamed of my fellow Wonketteers. Making, no, forcing this good Christian man to clean out the dick jokes, the “Fuck yous” and the other snide remarks about the greatest US Preznit of the 21st Century… Oh fuck I can’t fake anger anymore.

    Surely making this cognitive dissonant, weaselly, deluded ‘tard cry for trying to be nice to a total failure as a man and leader, someone he can relate to.

    I suspect that dipshit won’t realize that he will have more comments telling W to get fucked than to thank him.

  4. Baconcat

    i saw this one: ‘Ivan & Norma Specker’ and thought it was real, then I thought about it for a while and realized it wasn’t, but brilliant.

    Has anyone put up ‘incontinentia Buttocks’ yet?

  5. azw88

    damned, they are not allowing more than one post per computer now….. fushed my cache and cookies and still a no-go.

    They are using the patriot act to track us commies! They will be knocking at our doors any second

  6. SayItWithWookies

    I’ll get them when I’m not — ahem — working. I hope “Emerson Bigguns” isn’t taken by then.

  7. Panderfinder

    My faves: gleep glopp the invader (1046)

    and big sale on trucknutz (1049).

    the t-nutz signatories from the most recent page have been
    scrubbed.

    apparently the owner isn’t wise enough to scrub #225, Heywood….

  8. azw88

    here is a serious one…
    Adam Sportel-Cedar Rapids, IA-Screw you libs, W is a great man!

    Should we google this clown and send him some books and literature to set him straight?

  9. Crow T. Robot

    Just to say, this is the kind of thing that makes me happy.

    Sincerely,

    Hugh Jass (& I tried again as Harry Palmer, but they told me to come back later)

  10. gjdodger

    Bill the Weatherman is just as good as he was with McCain’s stupid “Don’t Tax Me” cheapo signs.

  11. CometHasTheFloor

    I especially like this grammatically challenged bit: “As commander-in-chief, I could not have felt more secure with anyone other than you at the helm.”

    Dude, you’re NOT commander-in-chief. Commander-in-chief is Captain Hammer. Captain Hammer, Corporate Tool.

    (Apologies to the Whedon clan)

  12. sk1win

    It’s pretty fun to go the last signatures page to watch this dipshit try and keep out the hysterical Wonkette signatures. Just hit refresh every couple of seconds–he can barely keep it below a 1000.

    At this point his is too busy mopping up to turn the water off.

  13. Mr Blifil

    I’m in there:

    1001 Hous Bin Phartin
    1002 X.O. Verrisi
    1003 Stanley Swizzlecockfucker
    1004 Anonymous
    1005 Ellmir Fyud
    1006 George Bush Sucks
    1007 Dick Goesinya
    1008 Archibald “Harry” Tuttle
    1009 How about no.
    1010 Hugh Jashol
    1011 PENIS!
    1012 Sarah Palin

  14. Totowa

    This is too much fun.
    Thanks Wonkette operatives. Excellent work, and to you George W; thanks for nothing you asshole.

  15. cracksammich

    857 Prescott Pharmaceuticals

    Stephen Colbert is behind this!

    You’ve got to pay to get your name listed, and in this economy, a laugh (even a hearty one) is hardly worth $2.

  16. Baseproduct

    [re=193897]azw88[/re]: Safe bet. “Thor, God of Thunder”, Arthur Dent, Dr. Rockso, Bosco Albert Baracus, and MeHeart Fellatio have all gotten past his watchful eye.

    And what, no love for #1000: Mark Penn?

  17. Sussemilch

    #1023 was a tribute to the soldiers who sacrificed their lives to protect freedom. Like their unphotographed coffins, they have been wiped from the record.

  18. obfuscator

    Is anyone else feeling ambivalent about the fact that W. himself would probably be quite amused by the most juvenile penis and poop related entries?

  19. MFitz

    [re=193947]cracksammich[/re]: Actually, I have to claim this one, but I won’t deny that he was my inspiration.

  20. sk1win

    I think the webmaster took off for the day and the 10% of Wonkette readers with jobs are now at home blowing this site up. This may hit 2500 signature by the time this cockhead gets back to scrubbing tomorrow.

  21. Tomthebunny

    [re=193936]queeraselvis v 2.0[/re]: Don’t know, but someone beat me to the Mike Hunt attempt.

  22. Panderfinder

    1082 Keyser Soze (hasn’t he been our veep these long eight years?)

    1180 Topical Ointment Fortrucknuts

    1221 ashley todd

    yes, the Wonkette audience must be posting, and the webmaster has
    left for happy hour at the 18th amendment or some such dive.

  23. lawrenceofthedesert

    The United States has indeed come a long way from the day I got out of the Army and spent a couple hours in Dallas’ Love Field paging folks on the white Braniff courtesy phone and listening to a young lady with an LBJ-level Texas accent ask for Harry Balls and Mike Hunt on my behalf. Otoh, Ollie Tabooger might not fly in Dallas the way it could in Green Bay.

  24. Bagglio Ordonez

    Mike Litoris was already taken…. thankfully he was recently married. Mike Litoris-Payne made an appearance.

  25. S.Luggo

    1118 Holden MaGroin
    1119 Capitan Strategery
    1123 Bob Ross
    1125 H. Percival Huffenpuff III
    1135 Holden Menutts
    1136 No Balls McGee
    1137 InternetLurker thinks Bush is an A-hole
    1138 deadmuslims
    1139 Deez Nuts
    1140 Butt Sects
    1142 Fellatio Consuelas Diez de la Horcha
    1143 Mona Lotzenkumme
    1144 AssMuncher
    1145 doosh bigalow
    1146 Merkin Muffley
    1147 Thorgrim Gaulraper
    _________

  26. robanybody

    I started with a very polite “Ironic Doubletalker,” but my Russian pal Uri Tingpalin is a big fan and will be on my neighbor’s wifi with my laptop in awhile to pay his respects.

    “New Orleans Corpse Eating Rats” offered some needed perspective.

  27. S.Luggo

    [re=193936]queeraselvis v 2.0[/re]: They’re cousins of “Mike Rotch”. But posting that signature would be extremely juvenile. — Robert Schuler

  28. Nigerian Business Executive

    We have all done our mothers proud. My awesome 69-yr-old mother signed the petition “Mike Kitzpertz.” I don’t know whether to laugh or barf.

  29. Lazy Media

    The ultimate goal is to survive the scrubbing, of course. It all starts going pear-shaped around Page 12 (thanks, Retard McGhee!), but in one of the first five pages Heywood Jablome has managed to secrete himself. Kudos, sir!

  30. finland

    number 1499, a mr. or ms. &ltimg src=””> offers some biting commentary! otherwise known as html fail.

  31. Theo_Mobius

    LOL, that’s a beautiful idea. I can’t help though, cause my work-around stopped working on my phone and I can’t access it at all from my work computer. I’m sure the webmaster will appreciate the more literary approach to trolling though.

  32. President Beeblebrox

    [re=194046]S.Luggo[/re]: Hey, I posted a bunch of Dr. Strangelove names too, and he scrubbed me.

    Damn, I was hoping he really thought there was a General Ripper out there who gave a crap about his site.

    Women sense my power and they seek the life essence. I do not avoid women, Mandrake!

  33. badmuthagoose

    I’m #1277, I doubt I’ll be scrubbed, the guy doesn’t seem smart enough to figure it out.

  34. badmuthagoose

    Whoops, now I’m #1238, but still there! I guess the “Cockmeat Sammich” sigs are easier to spot.

  35. badmuthagoose

    I tried to do Idi Amin, but they won’t let me add another. I was going to do all the semi-obscure evil dudes in history. Dammit. Heeey, I’ll get on the computer in the other room!

  36. Keram2

    Complete with the Sonic Youth spelling of “your”:

    “SHOW USS YR BIRTH CERTIFICATE JORGE DOUBLUE-U BUSH!!!!!!1!!! xSLUTZx”

    I consider this my finest work.

  37. LarryFeltonJ

    [re=194122]Keram2[/re]: That was good. I’m assuming it’ll get scrubbed, but it’s really good.

  38. rachelv

    too many good ones to read, but this is an excellent one:
    Oliver Wright Sargonne
    and it has a shot at surviving the cleanup!

  39. badmuthagoose

    Ok wait, Mike Litoris-Payne and New Orleans Coprse (sic) Eating Rats are still up but mine is scrubbed?

  40. Advocatus_Diaboli

    looks like the freepers are in full force counter “signing.” Hardly any fun anymore, really.

  41. ifthethunderdontgetya"

    [re=194118]LarryFeltonJ[/re]: I have just spended my last three out of 4 votes on your fine proposal.
    ~

  42. FreshCliches

    1260 Takeshi Tonyu

    I bow to your greatness, whomever you may be.

    Being the sincerest form of flattery, I’m going to see if Clive Landsteemer survives.

  43. LarryFeltonJ

    If these wingnuts are manually scrubbing the site, it doesn’t make any difference if the names we choose are obvious, since causing them to do noxious and tedious tasks is a noble activity in and of itself. But if we’re interested in surviving filters, we have to be creative. Ben Dover is probably a non starter. But Ahmed Bin D’hohver might pass a filter. And a wingnut scrutinizing this might have to spend a few seconds figuring out if they’re zapping the name of a grateful Iraqi ally.

    I’m in favor of names which don’t necessarily evoke shock among the numbnutz, but are downright silly names that a numbnut from the cast of the remake of Deliverance might actually have. I’m really partial to names like Gomer Pillsbury and Hepzibah Clack. Those two names might actually survive the list, but add to a certain ridiculous flavor.

  44. Sproutz

    I think mine, Ichii Balzac, got scrubbed–too ethnic, probably.

    This is better than prank phonecalls to GOP Headquarters.

  45. Larry McAwful

    When Anita Hanjob signed, she was No. 1232. One refresh and she was knocked back to No. 1221. Are people retracting their praises of President Bush?

  46. LarryFeltonJ

    Thank you kindly. The noble American Hog Nosed Skunk is hovering somewhere around 54th place. I’d really like it to get high enough that they notice and remove it. Why I want to do that is a mystery even to me. But I have a vision of the Wingnuts who run this site developing high blood pressure from a combination of the combined efforts of Paultards, TruckNutz, and random silly stuff at which I excel.

  47. Larry McAwful

    [re=194164]Kwame’[/re]: Oh, my God! I actually know someone by that exact name! I wonder if her parents ever thought of that! I can’t believe I never did!

  48. Hagar77

    Dude, I’ve got Gamey Hunder-Pantz and Ivana Mantahugankiz all queued up and now your link to that website is linking back to your link on why D.C. smells like dogshit. Does that mean they’re on to us?

  49. President Beeblebrox

    I managed to get Ivana Tinkle past them.

    God, this is as good as prank-calling Moe’s Tavern.

  50. Lionel Hutz Esq.

    This seems so haphazard. Some of these seem made up, but everyone knows that Lord Voldermort and Bush Sucks Big Donkey Dicks are real names.

  51. bonsai pajamas

    [re=194166]veganstar[/re]: I just saw it! Ain’t scrubbed, just moved.

    Moe Butsecks went the way of the dodo.

  52. Larry McAwful

    They wiped out my dear Anita Hanjob, but somehow, Ana Lynn Truder (Thank You!!) is still up there. I guess I just wasn’t subtle enough.

    I tried to go back and put Gay Head up there, but it wouldn’t let me post again.

  53. President Beeblebrox

    Dayum, I’m giggling like a little bitch here. I’ve not had so much fun since my friends and I egged our principal’s car in 10th grade.

    What do Ron Mexico, Dr. Clayton Forrester, the Detroit Lions, “Signing Anonymous not to get flamed, thank you GWB”, Scroto T. Baggins, H.S. Thompson, Valerie Plame, “I can has taco?”, Albert DeSalvo of Boston, Mass, ALLAHU AKHBAR!, and Stephen Hatfill all have in common?

    Why, they lurve our Preznit!

    Total WIN.

  54. Hagar77

    [re=194169]Hagar77[/re]: Correction — I mean that clicking on the “this one” in the Wonkette post will take you in a circle. Clicking on the article link will take you to the genuine pants-pissing absurdity that is this petition. I got Ms. Hunder-Pantz on there but the second entry asked me for a password and I’d be damned, y’know? Damn, this was fun. Like TP’ing the neighborhood asshole’s porch.

  55. foog

    Stupid password-protection. Now poor Terry Wristskum will never be able to show her gratitude to the greatest president ever.

  56. Freelance Minion

    I find it oddly funny that even before our juvenile jokes he has to shout an assurance THAT WE WON’T GET SPAMMED IF WE GIVE OUR EMAIL!!!!

    and then there is a checkbox promissing to spam us with more offers from this site.

    But we have to get the password. WHATS THE DAMN PASSWORD, I WANT TO GET SPAMMED WITH TRUCKNUTZ!!!

  57. bonsai pajamas

    Those fuckin iconoclasts! And I just went and got another bottle of Scotch! Oh well, some sweet gems made it past the 18-percento-meter. Too bad Shrubber ain’t smart enough to decode em. Will he beam proud knowing Handel d’Balzac is forever grateful for the war?

  58. DP

    Looks like they’re trying to mop up…Albert DeSalvo, Boston, MA is the only interesting one left on the last page…I kinda hope they’ll clean out all the Dick Sinmazipper jokes and actually present Bush with a petition signed by Winston Smith, Jeff Gannon, Ivan & Norma Specker, Thor and the Boston Strangler…I’d suggest a nice Rose Garden ceromony…

  59. windupbird

    This is very entertaining. For some reason, the combination of

    1021 Albert DeSalvo, Boston Mass
    1026 Jack Mahawgoff
    and

    1029 Military Industrial Complex

    Sent me into a fit of giggles…if you don’t have anything else to do, try http://www.anonymizer.com/ to hide your IP addy.

  60. persiflage

    It’s a testament to these folks’ general asshattery that they didn’t see this coming when they first put up the page. Like, who would dare mock the preznit in public? And why?


  61. Post author
    Jim Newell

    I wake up after a nap and there are 32,000 pageviews on this.

    Something terrible must have happened.

  62. JasperClay

    After seeing the FARK link and going to the page I sent the guy an email explaining that every POTUS since Truman has protected us from attack according to his logic and that 9/11 happened on George W. Bush’s watch. He sent back the usual its all Clinton’s fault claptrap. I sent him some links to the facts and he replied “the SITE isnot political. I however am NO a website.
    can you please stop emailing me and start praying for me!”

    So I replied, “Yes, this is the last email. And I will pray for you, and everyone else harmed and fooled by the Bush administration.”

    These people are afraid to admit they are wrong, substitute volume for intelligence, and are absolutely crazy. Man, I’m gonna miss them.

  63. Styrofoam Boots

    [re=194205]blusuede[/re]: THANK YOU THANK YOU! Now I, More butsecks with muslin terrorists plz!!!, can give a proper thank to G-dub.

  64. S.Luggo

    [re=194192]Dear Diorama[/re]:
    They want to believe that GWB/Phil Gramm/Larry Summers/Tim Geithner/
    Alan Greenspan/Paul Rubin/ parted the Red Sea through market deregulation. They cannot accept that they, as Pharaoh’s golden minions, are now drowning in red ink caused by their puppetry of the above sages and believe that, as they swallow the bitter brine of their own debt, it is all an FDR socialist trick.

  65. mattbolt

    Man, this petition was better in the good old days, when we ran wild in the hazy, wide-eyed days that were earlier today, before THE MAN got involved, we were free, man, back when we’d all blame DailyKos, and we posted all the lyrics to the Fresh Prince theme song and goatse links, I miss that era

  66. OffTheRecord

    [re=194200]Jim Newell[/re]: I blame finals. They make everything non-final related terrible entertaining

    Sincerely,

    Seymour Butts

  67. OffTheRecord

    [re=194214]OffTheRecord[/re]: And they apparently effect my ability to form complete sentences, also.

  68. Mr Blifil

    There is now a “Petition Password” field. So now to show your grassroots enthusiasm for thanking Dickwad McFucknutz for the last 8 years of hell, you have to be sent a password in advance.

    Hopefully the Wonkette encryption gurus are hard at work attempting to crack the algorithm.

  69. Panderfinder

    much scrubbing, but here are some gems:

    956 Heinrich “Henry” Himmler

    961 Priscilla Liberace

    983 BellaDonna

    1060 Jim McTrucknutz

    1066 Zaphod Beeblebrox
    ut
    The GWB lubbers cannot get rid of teh truknutz.

  70. President Beeblebrox

    [re=194221]Panderfinder[/re]: Hey, someone used my name! Zounds. But the win continues…

    1073 الله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبرالله أكبر

    (that looks like Allahu Akhbar in Arabic)

    1077 Gaius Baltar

    1081 Loaf Pincher

    1082 Ivan Toohurl

    1083 Maj. T.J. “King” Kong, USAF

    1084 Horny Toad

    1087 Brian Peppers

    1088 Heckua Job W.

    1090 You Prick

  71. bonsai pajamas

    Look at the first few pages of that petition and you’ll notice some other bits that have siphoned through the cracks. Some that’d be obvious to anarchists and deviants but are apparently invisible to trucknutz.

    Now, whutz that goddamn password? Carry on, men. Continue to bogart that petition!

  72. persiflage

    Here are some of the better ones, but not everything. It all began with Chuck U. Farley at 582. There was a lot of renumbering when things began to disappear, thus all the out-of-sequence ranges; it’s mostly in chrono order.

    582 Chuck U. Farley
    586 Hugh Schtink
    592 My Pet Goat
    594 fuck you assclown
    596 Fuckyou andYourSupporters
    597 Worst President Ever
    599 Fucknuts Mcdangleton
    600 Mr. H. istorywillrememberyouasthemostdestructivemonstertohaveeverheldtheofficeofpresidentoftheunitedstates
    601 Ihateyoudumbass
    602 Hugh Succock
    609 Yougottbe kiddinme
    610 Sal Iva
    613 Dorkus Malorkus
    614 Whoever wrote this is lame
    615 Tru K. Gnutz
    616 fuckface george
    617 ur a fucktard war criminal
    618 UR DETACED FROM REALITY
    620 Truck Nutz
    622 Gochoke Onapretzel
    626 I.M. Dipshyt
    630 Uma Stberetarded
    631 Shirley Eugest
    632 fuckyourself youfuckingretard
    633 Future Generations Paying For Your Mistake
    634 Jack MeHoff
    636 Wurst PresEvar
    637 VLADIMIR “BEEFCAKE” PUTIN
    638 George Bush is the best thing since Cancer
    640 Fukk A. Dukk
    641 Heywood Jablome
    642 The Taliban
    644 Gapin Fahjina
    645 Jess Kiddin
    646 Thank you for proving that even those who are mentally retarded can achieve anything, if they only have the right parents. Trig Palin for prex 2052!
    647 Get bent, asshole
    648 Thanks, Dubya, for laughing along with the rest of the world for the past 8 years while never once realizing that YOU were the butt of the joke.
    649 Byebye Whitehouse
    650 George Bush is a criminal assfuuuuck
    652 Hugh Jass
    653 Hugh Ruined DeGOP
    654 Nevar Cumback
    655 David Chapman
    658 Osama Bin Laden
    659 Little Lord Fauntleroy
    666 HaveFunInWarCrimesCourt
    668 Ur A Murderer and Torturer George Bush
    669 Johnny Cramdangle
    674 the world hates you
    676 None Of This Is True
    677 Ticklemy Taint
    678 R.U. Fucking Kidding Me, Jr.
    680 Amanda Livering-Payne
    681 Fuch U. Mann
    683 Ura Poopstain
    684 Did you have fun wiping your ass with the constitution, Dubya?
    686 war criminalizing is fun
    691 Ima Shamed
    692 Douche Bagg-Prezdent
    695 Hugh Goddabekidding
    697 redrum
    698 Miserable Failure
    700 Morgoth: Destroyer of Worlds
    701 Richard Nixon
    702 Uran Ydeot
    704 Republitard
    707 Texas Secedeagain Please
    708 Perfumed Prince and Chief Fucktard
    709 Fuck Bush the war criminal
    711 Gotohell W. Bush
    713 Fascism
    714 Anita Gofradump
    715 Goeff Yourself Cheney
    724 1,000,000 dead Iraqis
    735 UrTheWorstPresInHistory
    736 Ivana Humpalot
    737 goodriddanceasshole
    740 Thishasgotto B. Ajoke
    741 Disillusioned US Citizen
    742 thank you mr bush for killing 4000 of our own citizens
    747 Raptor Jesus
    748 Hitler Youth of America
    754 Joe T Plumber
    755 Dixie Normous
    777 bob myknob
    779 You have fucked this country in the asshole goodbye
    785 Jack Ass
    791 Bush you are the worst human to ever live.
    793 What T F Ever
    794 ROTINHELL
    795 I hope you get impeached, you assbag.
    798 At least Nixon was smart enough to know he was an asshole.
    802 youfukedeveryonedouche
    803 Best dictator in U.S. history!
    806 Sandy Vagina
    807 Adios scumbag
    811 Your FAIL is epic. Go now and FAIL no more
    812 Katrina Hussein McBankFailure
    815 Retardo Montalban
    816 Larry “Widestance” Craig
    817 Goodriddance
    820 satan himself
    822 Yugo Fuckyermother
    823 unbelievable
    755 Worst… President… EVER!
    756 fuck you
    758 Ricard Cabeza
    759 I guess even fuck ups deserve a second chance
    762 No Way
    765 you are a moron
    766 Retarded middle america thanks you dearly
    768 You have fucked this country over for 8 years, do us a favour and die in a fire
    769 Saddam Hussein
    770 Cheerio You Massive Tool
    771 Jesus
    772 Joe Ritzenbacher
    773 adolf
    775 Worst 8 years EVER! Thanks, you gigantic fuktard
    777 GWB Sucks the Big One
    779 Oil Tycoon Billionaires of America
    780 Eat shit you fucking piece of neocon slime
    783 Whitemanlittle penis
    784 Hugh Jasle
    774 Hugh G. Rection
    775 Come on, George W Bush must have started this. There is no way this was done by a competent person.
    778 warmongering fuckhead
    779 Thanks for the laughs, clown.
    789 Thanks For spending this country into ruin and destroying the republican party!
    790 Scroto T. Baggins
    752 Thanks for a 2nd Great Depression!
    755 H. S. Thompson
    778 A blind retarded monkey would have done a better job.
    779 YOURE A DICKHEAD
    781 Another Screwedamerican
    782 MISSION ACCOMPLISHED __ DESTOYED ECONOMY, 2 WARS AND BROKEN GOVERNMENT
    784 Wall Street CEO
    787 Valerie Plame
    788 C ya soon! Beezlebub
    793 Thanks for killing so many young people! You rock! Hope you spend a nice retirement haunted by the people who died because of your war!!!! Best Wishes, killer!
    797 Just Get Gone, Chump
    786 Burn in Hell
    787 Thank you for destroying the Conservative Party! Cheers!
    789 youfail
    790 Dontlet TheDorr Hityouintheass Onthewayout
    791 Putin Owned you
    792 Pig Benis
    797 Mike Litoris
    870 Oliver Clozzoff
    876 My daughter is proud to carry your child, maverick ! –Sarah Palin
    877 Thanks for doing everything your enemies wanted you to do, SUCKER!!! you got played, usa got SLAYED!!!!
    882 Jack Sofalot
    908 Hillary Clinton
    915 GWB, 8 years of stealing rights and bombing brown people
    916 Fuck n Idiot
    917 Hugh G. Rection
    918 Youmust B. Freakingkiddingme
    934 Tupac Shakur
    936 Judge Dredd
    937 Thanks for making me look good compared to you. Your friend, Dick Nixon
    941 World economy unstable, Iraq unstable, N Korea has nukes, thousands of US troops dead, US taxpayers buried in debt, Bin Laden still on the loose, Al Qaeda recruiting going through the roof. Thanks ever so much.
    942 Anon E. Muss wishes you all the mudkips your cheeks can handle. Both sets.
    945 Showing “appreciation” towards this coward of a man for his actions regarding 9/11 cheapen the impact of that event and prove just how much ground the terrorists won on that day.
    947 Doo Shoverlord
    979 Amanda Hugginkiss
    983 MeHeart Fellatio
    984 Miserable Failure
    986 Homer Sekchal
    987 New Orleans Corspe Eating Rats
    990 Red Ruffansore
    995 Curtis Interuptis
    999 A veteran who served you loyally and hates you just as much.
    1000 Ben Dover
    1007 The Third Roman Legion, Gaul
    1008 Chase Rooster Palin
    1006 Poopyface Flippityflop
    1007 Owaa Tafoo Layam
    1008 Fuck You
    1009 GWB OMG WTF
    966 Wuudja Blowme
    978 Mike Rotch
    994 Jeff Gannon
    995 Mr. Bator
    995 Harry Chesticles
    1001 Hous Bin Phartin
    1002 X.O. Verrisi
    1003 Stanley Swizzlecockfucker
    999 Bushie Killedmycountry
    1010 Ethel Mertz
    1027 Idiot Supreme
    1029 Karl Rove
    1030 William Ayres
    1031 the economy
    1032 Eat my shorts
    1036 Derbashin Myballsin
    1039 Ron “ohmyfuckinggodwhywhyhowcanyoulikethisman” Paul
    1042 Unborn Fetus
    1043 Pudge Facker
    1044 Force McCochen
    1045 Ann L. Wortz
    1046 Dumber than a bag of rocks
    1047 Wors T. President
    1048 Shitstain Asswipe
    1051 Go USA! Get a Brain Morans!
    1053 Bush sucks a big donkey dick
    1054 Barack Obama (thank you thank you thank you!!!)
    1055 Words cannot express my fury for the way you have fucked up many of the large crises my country has faced. I know you are not working alone to fuck it up, but as commander-in-chief, I could not have felt more vulnerable with you at the helm. I just wish there had been a man of integrity, morals, selflessness and love for fellow humans in your place. You are truly the worst president ever. – Ella Funt
    1056 Dork Cheney
    1058 Al Kahaliqh
    1062 Dilawar the Afghan Taxi Driver
    1063 You Killed My Brother
    1065 I would make a threat but then thanks to att sucking your dick I would have federal agents at my door
    1066 Unemployed
    1068 The World Trade Center
    1078 Darth Maul
    1079 Ollie Taboner
    1081 ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME????? THAT SCUMBAG NEEDS TO ROT IN JAIL
    1082 Ima Terrist
    1083 Keyser Söze
    1084 All of Canada: Thanks for not being our leader we appreciate it.
    1085 Satan Jr.
    1086 Choke on a pretzel sir
    1087 Chesty LaRue
    1096 The Federal Reserve
    1097 note- the orginal message has been intercepted by att for containg slander against the great president bush and federal agents will arrive shortly to arrest the poster
    1098 Katya Cherkinov
    1099 whatshabeuscorpus?
    1100 9/11
    1101 Yo Mama
    1104 Failure McEconomykiller
    1105 you are an idiot. thanks for fucking up everything
    1108 you ruined our country, good riddance to you. take the loser republitards with you
    1111 douchey mcdouchebaggery
    1113 The Prince of Darkness
    1115 Vladimir Nabokov
    1116 Failly McPhail
    1117 Samuel Satan Lucifer
    1118 Byrne, Inheil
    1120 TheDecider
    1127 Youjackass
    1139 Constitution McRaper
    1140 YourKidz IsmyCannonFodder
    1142 gofellatea elephant
    1143 Heckuva Job Brownie
    1144 Geaux Phuckeurself
    1151 Thanksfornothingdouchebag
    1153 Ima Boozer
    1154 If I did it 9/11 Edition
    1155 Masonic Skumm
    1157 headupmyass
    1159 Mission Complete
    1160 George Bush Is a War Criminal!
    1186 Comrade Wingnut
    1190 Charlie Manson
    1194 Ws_Coke_Spoon
    1196 Get Lost Bush
    1197 What am I thankful for, again?
    1198 fuck you cocksucker
    1201 Thanks for shitting on the Constitution and Bill of Rights!!
    1202 The whole world hates the US now
    1205 Muslims Arepeopletoo
    1207 Thanks for nothing, you rotten waste of air.
    1214 Miss N. Complissed
    1217 Nice death threat buddy
    1220 Thank you for ruining my country, asshole!!
    1224 Bob Onmyknob
    1233 Joseph McCarthy
    1234 Privatise the profits! Socialise the losses!
    1240 Hey, thanks for cutting into the environment and signle handedly dooming my grandchildren!!
    1242 New Orleans was delicious. Om Nom Nom -Katrina.
    1247 say hello to the hague, w
    1249 Worst. Presidency. Ever!
    1252 Wilma Fingerdew
    1254 No President did more to hurt America since Buchanan
    1256 Toto Fay Lure
    1259 Iva Benscrewed
    1260 Bush is a Douche Nozzle
    1266 All of the shady contractors you have made rich with your illegal war
    1256 Miss Ann A. Komplest
    1259 Rich Encrimi
    1267 Yuverra Amy Stake
    1269 Misha N. Complished
    1272 Pinkley Taurus
    1272 sanctity of life my ass he caused the deaths of hundreds of thousands of innocent people.
    1274 Thanks President Numbnuts!
    1275 youkilledmyfriends
    1271 Ura Dunse
    1274 Claude Gerbals
    1275 Anita Rim-Jhab
    1276 im asian american and i want to go back to china
    1228 Thanks for nothing, dickbag.
    1229 Urey Tool
    1233 Richard Cranium
    1235 Scrotey McScrotebag
    1241 Limp McDicky
    1245 Thank you, you were the worst disaster to ever hit America.
    1246 Youra Moran
    1248 Smokey McPot
    1249 Hugh Janus
    1256 Go fuck yourself GWB!
    1261 izzie afuktard
    1264 protect you from danger? Are you a little girl?
    1268 Sincerely Disgusted
    1271 Thanks for nothing, dickbag.
    1272 Urey Tool
    1295 Lawrence Fine
    1156 You anti-American homosexual Muslim book-skimming ACORNs have taken YET ANOTHER perfectly good & respectable website — this one designed to thank George W. Bush for the various wars and contracting economies — and ruined it with your filthy jokes about butts and poop. The site’s webmaster is now having to scrub your PUERILE CRAP petition signatures at a breakneck pace leaving him/her no time for SELF-PLEASURE. Let’s check out some of these toilet-humor “names” from you people who only want John Kerry to run the country and nothing else will do. * #952: The entire 1985 Dever Broncos. * #958: Ollie Tabooger * #965: lord voldemort * #967: An hero * #972: Ol PP McPperton * #987: Bush sucks big donkey dicks * #1003: homer sekchal The number of petition signers is vacillating between 990 and 1,030, depending on how quick the webmaster is. There are also a lot of libtards there whining about torture and the Patriot Act and divisive politics… lame. Just make your dick joke and move on.
    1157 9/11 Deaths 2819—Iraqi War Deaths 4209 *Great Job Bushie!!!*
    1161 Shit for Brains
    1166 worst…. president…. ever
    1176 American Pretzel Council
    1177 Dallas Whites Only HOA
    1182 Go to Hell you Bastard Ass
    1209 E. Zauerst Perez-Edantaver
    1240 Our Childrens (are learning)
    1244 Solong Screwy
    1254 Phuque Yoo
    1260 Jack MeHoffer
    1262 Dain Bramage
    1265 You Cocksucker!
    1269 Mission Accomplished oh wait
    1270 Scott Palins Taint
    1277 Thank you for destroying this once great country!
    1278 Hide T. Hotdog
    1288 thanks for destroying the honor of this great nation. I hope it regains that honor despite your efforts
    1293 Ann “the man” Coulter
    1251 Turd Blossom
    1258 In soviet Russia, Bush signs you
    1268 Mike Oxbig
    1269 The degree of incompetence over the past eight years has been truly astounding, and it is my sincere hope that you find some way to redeem yourself for your actions over the last eight years.
    1284 Thanks for restricting stem cell research and hindering medical research in the name of your religion!
    1291 I can haz Hague trail for Bush Chenny kkplzthnx
    1293 Thanks for ruining the country, asshole.
    1306 Mr. Yellow Cake
    1307 Richard Fucking Nixon
    1310 Dick Smegma
    1317 Herbert Hoover (Glad to have you in the “worst presidents” club)
    1323 George, If you paid attention to the PDB in Aug 2001, you might have been able to stop the f*cking terrorists, you worthless piece of shit!
    1325 Jan 20, 2009 – The end of an Error
    1329 Geroge Bush is a fucking idiot and so is whomever made this site. Fuck you both!
    1332 o. please
    1335 Karma Hurtz
    1344 Is this where I ask for a pardon?
    1351 P. Retzel-Chok
    1355 Massive FAIL
    1385 “Mission Accomplished” — Chimpy McFlightsuit
    1307 Failure McFailyton
    1321 Burn in hell you murderous, incompetent jag-off
    1322 can I live in your basement when I get laid off?
    1253 Sarah Ya Betcha Palin
    1255 Howie S. Babbyformed
    1265 Barry D. Ballsack
    1254 Mr. Miyagi
    1266 Ana Lynn Sershin
    1279 Alex P. Keaton
    1284 President Douchetard McFailson
    1180 Another Brainwashed Moron
    1181 T. Ali Baan
    1182 Thanks for ruining my country, you ass
    1191 Ludafail W. Democrathelper
    1194 Fawn Liebowitz
    1196 You are insane
    1198 internet ruining wonkette readers defecate on bush legacy
    1200 Thanks for finally going away
    1220 For the sake of proper screening, you might have to brush up on some reading other than the scrolling ticker on Fox News. There is an impressive collection of fictional characters from negative utopian literature to science fiction, interspersed with a liberal amount of sordid personalities in those first 1000 names. -Franz Kafka
    1186 Kanyube Enemorry Tardid
    1189 Amada Hugnkiss
    1190 Anita Spankin
    1154 Ya know I love ya, Georgie, you are a credit to your family and party. Hugs and kisses, Satan PS xoxo
    1159 sockpuppet
    1160 Ginger Lynn Allen
    1161 George Jetson
    1166 Gay Talese
    1168 Bigus Dickus
    1174 Regnad Kcin
    1185 Tony T. Tiger
    1188 Briana Banks
    1189 Thanks for the massive debt, high unemployment rate, and loss of civil liberties! Oh, and the war crimes? Icing on the cake!
    1192 Chimpy McCokePants
    1193 bite my shiny metal ass
    1195 Thanks for protecting us from imaginary threats and getting thousands of our troops killed. I hope you end up in jail.
    1203 Bartleby Fdge Packerington
    1206 Thanks for making meeven more proud to be a Canadian , ya douche
    1218 Silvia Saint
    1228 Incontinentia Buttocks
    1235 Hugh G. Dingleberry
    1236 Seriously? Thank you? Where have you been for the past eight years?
    1239 Go FUCK Yourself, Bush & Cheney
    1240 Theo Cracy
    1242 And with that, he faded away into the welcoming arms of unconsciousness, accompanied by a sound she would never forget; the disgusting, indescribable sound of Scrappy’s latex-clad corpse being forcibly inserted into Scooby’s anus, head first… good bye, Bush.
    1246 Harry Perotestees
    1252 Bush is a cancerous anal wart
    1255 Nina Hartley
    1263 Para Palegicsoldier
    1265 Colin “Biggest mistake of my career” Powell
    1266 Tera Patrick
    1277 Richard Marx
    1280 Ashlyn Gere
    1286 Flying spaghetti monster
    951 Ana Lynn Truder (Thank You!!)
    956 Heinrich “Henry” Himmler
    957 Richard Fitzwell
    988 Ana Lynn Sershin
    1009 Martin Bormann
    1021 Albert DeSalvo, Boston, Mass.
    1037 Ed Gein
    1041 Dickins Cider
    1043 More butsecks with muslin terrorists plz!!!
    1044 Constitutional Arsonist
    1056 Phil McHunt
    1057 Bush = Fail
    1060 Jim McTrucknutz
    1061 Chase Young Boise
    1066 Zaphod Beeblebrox
    1068 Willie Fistersnatch

  73. Mojopo

    Yeah, I was scrubbed earlier today. And now that bitch won’t let me add Clarence DeClowne. I’ve tried four times with assorted names. Bummer.

    Wait – no PASSWORD. Gotta go!

  74. Kelstar The Mighty

    Got Adolpho Hilter (no relation) up there for just a bit. My favorite so far, methinks, is Diana Feir. Classic.

  75. ExecutorElassus

    Alas! Passworded again! And I was going to add – in honor of the fabulous Roller-Derby Diva of the same name – Markie D. Sod.

    How will I make it through my Tuesday without bashing my head in with this scotch bottle if I can’t abuse some bushtard’s tribute page?

    And why did they think making a tribute page for the president with the lowest approval rating in recorded history wouldn’t end in their being pwned by Wonketteers?

  76. bonsai pajamas

    Patience, fellow hunters. Just wait by the hole and they’ll come out eventually. And when they do, Babs Sabich will be waiting for them.

  77. bonsai pajamas

    Ah, shitz! Those Wonkette “writers” are at it again, and this IMPORTANT thread is moving downstream at a breakneck pace. Sorta. So here’s the thing: If I manage to sneak into Fort Petition. I’ve already decided to throw myself on the wire. I will post the password right there on the petition, so be looking for it with your pee, du du names ready to slam in, okay? Hopefully, this will inspire other selfless creatures like myself to do the same periodically so’s we can keep this puppy going til Jan. 20. It’s that important.

    Wire-thrower-onners, you’ll receive a dozen virgins in heaven. Virgins, yes, but who know everything there is about great sex.

  78. badmuthagoose

    The entire THING is scrubbed now. It shows place markers for over a thousand signatures, but zero text. None. They got rid of all of them.

    Awww, I guess this means no one wants to thank Chucklenuts. Poor Chucklenuts.

  79. SecPro

    It looks like poor Naivey McBushteabagger got fed up and decided to scrub everyone’s signatures. I just took another look for laughs and since yesterday afternoon, when I signed as Ann L. Wortz, all the signatures have been erased. Curiously, it still shows a total of 1,049 signatures, but every single one is blank.

  80. pinko-commie

    Fellow Wonketteers,

    Thank you for all you have done to protect me from republitards. It has been sever years since our country’s fundamental values were attacked by the so-called “war on terror” and most of our nation’s values were abandoned. I am truly greatful [sic] for the way you have handled one of the most profound crises my country has ever faced (i.e., the Bush presidency) with endless snarkiness and trucknutz!. As fellow pinko-commies, I could not have felt more scared with anyone other than Bush at the helm. Thank you for being people of wit and endless potty humor. May God (or whatever) bless you.

  81. pinko-commie

    I also would like to take a moment to thank America’s true heroes – the Heywood Jablomes of the world who were able to get their naughty names by the webmaster-censors without detection. That’s why we won WWII! Americans never give up! USA! USA! USA!

  82. windupbird

    The only sad part about this was that more people weren’t able to sign the petition with a nom de plume.

    I wish I had the chance to say, “Thanks for having the IRS audit me three weeks after my daughter and I sent you and Cheney an email about how you and FEMA f-ed up in your slow response to Hurricane Katrina.”

    signed,

    Baby Jane Hudson

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