Looking chipper!MSNBC blabbermouth Chris Matthews has been running around Washington and Philadelphia like a horny debutante, meeting with fancy Democrats and buying Pennsylvania real estate so that (maybe, possibly, allegedly) he could run for the Senate in 2010. His opponent would be Arlen Specter, a venerable Republican who has been a senator for nearly 30 years, a man who had CANCER, for God’s sake, and still showed up to WORK, without any hair. Will Chris Matthews be that awesome to the people of Pennsylvania?

The answer is no, because no human mortal could. That leads us to explanation number two for Tweety’s strange behavior: he actually has no intention of leaving his cush job at MSNBC and is just flirting with this Senate thing to make his bosses feel bad about giving Keith Olbermann a big fat raise. After all, what better way to get your own raise than to threaten to leave your job for one that pays way, way less?

Currently, Matthews is pulling in around $5 million a year, though it’s widely believed that he’ll be offered less this time around. … It’s highly unlikely that Matthews’ deal will match the one offered to another MSNBC host, Keith Olbermann. Earlier this month, the network scrapped Olbermann’s contract and reportedly upped his yearly take from $4 to $7.5 million, through 2012.

Hell, is the DNC still looking for a chairman? Why not give that to Chris Matthews? It is the perfect position for a loud man with many opinions.

Matthews inches closer to Senate run [Politico]

Donate with CCDonate with CC


  1. Matthews should run for the House, just so he could share a chamber with Michelle Bachmann. I’d move to Pennsylvania just so I could vote for him.

    However, with both Matthews and Al Franken in the Senate, C-Span would become much more entertaining.

  2. Christ, he looks like hell there. I can practically smell the reak of bourbon on his breath and hear the incoherent mumbling about “y’seeee, heeere’s-‘a thing about secretary o’ educatiooon…”

  3. Wouldn’t it be nice to see Chris Matthews dealing with being asked Chris Matthews-type questions? Or would that much inanity in one place cause the universe to asplode?

  4. I would rather they let him roam free in a field with a Hilary chew-toy. Aside from a bad peroxide job and a mouth (from where nothing useful ever emanates) large enough to hold four billiard balls, what is there to recommend him?

  5. Um, isn’t there someone from Pennsylvania who could represent the people of the great state of Pennsylvania?

    I never get this, why states would let any goofy celebrity from somewhere else come in and claim to understand their needs, fears, deepest legislative desires, etc.

  6. Out of curiosity, has the phrase “Will the gentleman from Pennsylvania just shut the fuck up?” ever appeared in the Congressional Record?

  7. I seen it with my own two eyes: Arlen, fulfilling his ranking member duties, barely audible, with no hair, at a Judiciary Committee mark-up. Anita Hill, Schmanita Hill. Magic bullet, schmagic bullet. He da man. Fuck Chris Matthews.

  8. He makes 5 million a year? For what? Probing, insightful political analysis and masterful interviewing journalism? HA!

    Matthews has all the skillz of your local, townie-bar blowhard. He should be glad he doesn’t get paid in complimentary pretzels.

  9. [re=191220]Anonymous Office Zombie[/re]: They must pay him many dineros to keep him from the clutches of Turner at CNN and Ailes at FoxNews. Har har.
    It’s like Couric’s contract at CBS. Mostly in place to keep talent like that in house.

  10. [re=191234]magic titty[/re]:
    They must be shoveling gold doubloons at that talented mofo just to keep him from founding his own journalistic empire and putting all news people to shame and out of business.

    I don’t know why I even bother ever tuning into Hardball when I do. It’s always the same. Matthews arbitrates a squabble and then throws out his own random deciding opinion based on gut reaction regardless of what his guests say.

  11. Alternative caption: “Sir, what happened in there?” “I [hic] dunno… I just grabbed this biker’s girlfriend’s tits, and all [hic] fucking hell broke loose!”

  12. [re=191274]Anonymous Office Zombie[/re]: Yes. But – there are guests on Hardball? I thought those were just wax figures he’s allowed to shout at?

  13. Anonymous Office Zombie: okay, for two complimentary bar pretzels, mmmmm….we loved him when he made Michelle have her McArthy orgasm….and drew her out for a couple additional contractions….I think I like him right where he is – the fluffer for Olberman, who is the warm-up act for my Rachelle….

  14. Oh, oh, oh, I hope he runs and then that dickwad from wherever–fuck, I’m so sick and congested I can’t think (or it’s the lortab) that Zel Miller, the from that crap state that would be as bad as Okrafuckinghoma if it weren’t for the large number of African-American voters– will run for the senate again.

    And OH, this is so fucking good–They will both win and Miller will finally get that duel, and the oddsmakers can divvy up the money on who is Aaron Burr and who is Alexander Hamilton. They were both power-hungry nut-jobs, so the fit is perfect.

    WIN! Run, Chris, run, and Zelig–the nation is crying for your return. If they don’t want you in Georgia, or whatever Dixie hell-hole you’re in, move to OK–you’d be incredibly popular here. All you have to do is put that crazy convention speech on a loop and run it over and over, interjecting challenging Matthews to a duel once in a while.

    Oh, and on another dumb Okie point, my friend was at a convenience store and asked the ‘billie to turn up the sound because it was an Obama press conference. The fat white trash lady said she didn’t want to watch him, because he was a do-nothing president. WhAAAA? Friend pointed out that, in fact, the guy the white trash lady (don’t think she called the fat bitch that to her face) probably voted for was still the president.

    Oklahoma is hysterically funny–the okies just don’t get the joke.

  15. he would actually prolly end up running against Santorum- already word that the Repubz will run a more conservative candidate against Arlen in the primary, and considering the fate of the moderate R these days, Senator Chemo is doomed. Debates between santorum and matthews would be HIGHly entertaining, however.

  16. [re=191161]nurple[/re]: Srsly. Of all the real skuzzbag Republican senators you could replace, Arlen Spectre isn’t one of them. Not even in the top 30.

  17. I was looking forward to being rid of Tweety Pie and putting him in the senate where he would be slapped down every day of his diabetic life by people he used to slobberingly skewer. Jesus, what an intolerable asshole.

    I’ll forgive him for many things except this comment he made about seeing “W” walking from the Camp Davis heliport: “Look at him swagger! Americans love a swaggering president.”

    Chris Matthews is a hack boob and he has no business in journalism. Put him in politics where we expect asshole boob nutcases to be and where we can gradually lose track of him altogether.

Comments are closed.

Previous articleArab Camels Spotted Near Porous Mexican Border
Next articleSenator Calls New Capitol Visitor Center A ‘Left-Leaning’ Offense To God