DECORATING ADVICE  11:03 am December 3, 2008

Terribly Offensive Ornament Will NOT Hang On White House XMas Tree After All

by Sara K. Smith

This is a repellent image.Ha ha, so after it looked like Laura Bush was going to be all gracious about festooning the White House Christmas tree with a repulsive ornament decorated in tiny letters detailing a Washington State representative’s support of her husband’s impeachment, the first lady’s spokeswoman says that she will have none of this nonsense.

Sally McDonough, a spokeswoman for the first lady, confirmed the ornament would not be displayed. “It’s inappropriate and it’s not being hung,” she said. She said that when asked about the issue yesterday, the White House tree decorations were not complete. “We reviewed the ornament along with all the [other] ornaments, and Mrs. Bush deemed it inappropriate for the holiday tree.”

FREE SPEECH LAURA BUSH IS STIFLING OUR LIBERTIES! The White House Christmas tree will be decorated exclusively with photos from Abu Ghraib instead.

White House Won’t Hang Christmas Impeachment Ornament [Reliable Source]

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Hola wonkerados.

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Serolf Divad December 3, 2008 at 11:05 am

Maybe we can substitue a pair of Truck Nytz instead?

P.S.: Get your daily dose of anti-GOP bile here. Sample:

“Through its members’ selfishness and greed; their short sightedness and stupidity, the Republican party could not have damaged this country more than it already has if each of its members had strapped explosives to his chest and exploded them in shopping malls, movie theaters, businesses and airplanes throughout the nation.”

You know you love reading this shit.

ManchuCandidate December 3, 2008 at 11:05 am

I still think Truck Nutz is a better choice than a pic of Lyndsey England (classy looking with the cig dangling from her mouth) pointing at some poor Iraqi’s shriveled parts.

El Topo December 3, 2008 at 11:06 am

I love that. “Inappropriate,” as if it showed pictures of nuns fucking gerbils, or something.

Truculent December 3, 2008 at 11:07 am

Deborah will be at Guantanamo before the sun sets. Seditious bitch

Mr Blifil December 3, 2008 at 11:07 am

Yet another Xmas wherin the tree of the family occupying the White House will not be well hung.

A change is coming…

McCainsThirdNipple December 3, 2008 at 11:07 am

Hey great job on posting a 3 day old story, Wonkette. Your next post is going to be about Bush pardoning a turkey, right?

sowbelly December 3, 2008 at 11:07 am

A peach ornament? Okay, I guess. Doesn’t sound very chrismassy but go ahead.

Mustang December 3, 2008 at 11:08 am

Sally McDonough should have told that artist that Mrs. Bush reviewed her ornament and deemed it butt-ugly because that is word.

freakishlystrong December 3, 2008 at 11:09 am

“He’s inappropriate and he’s not well hung”..She’s describing her husband.

ManchuCandidate December 3, 2008 at 11:12 am

[re=189757]Serolf Divad[/re]:
Damn you! Jinx!

Botswana Meat Commission FC December 3, 2008 at 11:13 am

How much of the year do you think Laura Bush spends munching on happy-happy-fun-time pills and planning the White House Christmas Tree ornamentation? I’m guessing at least 9 or 10 months…

Sara K. Smith December 3, 2008 at 11:13 am

[re=189764]McCainsThirdNipple[/re]: Oh get fucked. This story is only a day old, and you are certainly welcome not to read it.

Crow T. Robot December 3, 2008 at 11:14 am

My suspicion is that if the artist could have kept her mouth shut a few more days–it might actually have been hung on the tree. The impulse to self advertise has undone many a glorious prank.

Miller December 3, 2008 at 11:17 am

Good, now Bush won’t have to open his “Pobody’s Nerfect in the White House” hat on Christmas morning with that ornament mocking him from on high. Crisis averted, now check to see if any of the manger figurines have too judgmental looks on their porcelain faces. We don’t want George to feel they’re judging him.

Monsieur Grumpe' December 3, 2008 at 11:17 am

So who got the job of putting all the ornaments under a microscope?

Serolf Divad December 3, 2008 at 11:17 am


I sorta had the feeling that 8 of the first 10 posts would mention the advisability of substituting a pair of truck nutz for the missing ornament. I mean, it’s not like truck nutz aren’t a theme on Wonkette… with the added benefit that they were prominently featured on last night’s Daily Show (I strongly suspect a Daily Show writer is a fan of this site).

freakishlystrong December 3, 2008 at 11:19 am

[re=189773]Sara K. Smith[/re]: You go sista!

elcapitan December 3, 2008 at 11:19 am

They’ll take this ornament and drag it behind their truck, which is what Texans do with things they don’t like.

Neon Trotsky December 3, 2008 at 11:20 am

[re=189772]Botswana Meat Commission FC[/re]: Hillz may have had “health care reform” as her political portfolio while First Lady, but Laura’s quite content with “holiday decorations” so long as the pills keep flowing…

Pop Socket December 3, 2008 at 11:20 am

[re=189764]McCainsThirdNipple[/re]: The linked story was in this morning’s WaPo. It’s not Sara’s fault that her drunk delivery driver doesn’t throw it on her lawn until nearly noon.

hedgehog December 3, 2008 at 11:20 am

“The First Lady will, however, wear the ornament in her pierced labia while attending the White House tree lighting.”

TGY December 3, 2008 at 11:21 am

Mr. Bush, tear down this ball!

ManchuCandidate December 3, 2008 at 11:21 am

[re=189780]Serolf Divad[/re]:
I was thinking along the same lines, too.

If I were looking for absurd political shit this would be the place.

cal December 3, 2008 at 11:22 am

It’s the Republican War on Christmas!

SayItWithWookies December 3, 2008 at 11:23 am

There’s still a chance it’ll appear on next year’s tree. We can call this one the “last Christmas tree of low expectations.”

ManchuCandidate December 3, 2008 at 11:23 am


WadISay December 3, 2008 at 11:24 am

[re=189757]Serolf Divad[/re]: Re your Patriot’s Quill link, anybody who thinks the Age of Aquarius has come to the GOP missed Saxby Chambliss’es massively mean-spirited victory speech on the radio this morning. True, he did not say that he would find more Democratic vet amputees to smear, but, that aside, everything else seems to be on the table.

Woodwards Friend December 3, 2008 at 11:37 am

[re=189773]Sara K. Smith[/re]: Oh no you idn’t!

freakishlystrong December 3, 2008 at 11:37 am

[re=189757]Serolf Divad[/re]: Nicely done, and thanks, my blood hadn’t boiled yet today.

Truculent December 3, 2008 at 11:40 am

[re=189774]Crow T. Robot[/re]: I agree. It would have been great to let the news drop on, say, Christmas eve

NotAnEvilLobbyist December 3, 2008 at 11:41 am

[re=189764]McCainsThirdNipple[/re]: Yea, three days old. Must be that same old Republican math that gets three days from a story posted at 2:50pm yesterday. Straight from the story linked:

“By The Reliable Source | December 2, 2008; 2:50 PM ET “

Rev. Peter Lemonjello December 3, 2008 at 11:42 am

Is it too late to hope for an ornament picturing Lynndie England with a cigarette hanging out of her mouth, pointing at two other carefully placed ornaments over a picture of Saxby Chambliss’ granddaughter’s bosom?

Cape Clod December 3, 2008 at 11:44 am

[re=189780]Serolf Divad[/re]: I enjoyed your article and the link to the Free Republic. Is it possible to O.D. on Schadenfruede?

Cape Clod December 3, 2008 at 11:46 am

[re=189773]Sara K. Smith[/re]: You are definately my first choice as Press Secretary when I become President.

Serolf Divad December 3, 2008 at 11:52 am

[re=189810]Cape Clod[/re]:

I think it’s like dying of a heart attack in a room full of hookers and blow.

Fivetree December 3, 2008 at 11:58 am

Leave it to my Congressman-For-Life “Baghdad Jimmy” McDermott to be involved in something like this. It’s why we love him and why he has the job security of Kim Jong-Il. You can see him, smack-dad center on the ornament, smiling at Bush and saying “fuck inappropriate, I don’t care that it’s Christmas”.

Min December 3, 2008 at 12:04 pm

[re=189788]TGY[/re]: Damn. I wish I had thought of that.

actor212 December 3, 2008 at 12:09 pm

So without this one ball, is the Christmas tree well hung at the White House? Can the Bush take this one more balling????

Mr Blifil December 3, 2008 at 12:11 pm

[re=189823]Serolf Divad[/re]: I always suspected you were a Rockefeller Republican…

V572625694 December 3, 2008 at 12:13 pm

[re=189761]El Topo[/re]: [re=189768]freakishlystrong[/re]: Dontcha love how the word “inappropriate” has been hijacked to mean “not in my interest”?

i.e. “Dallas Stars winger Sean Avery has been suspended indefinitely by the NHL for what the league call ‘inappropriate public comments’ he made Tuesday morning after a practice in Calgary.”

The “inappropriate comments were something about sloppy seconds.

WhatTheHeck December 3, 2008 at 12:15 pm

[re=189773]Sara K. Smith[/re]:
I ain’t never gonna mess with you.
Your retorts strike terror like bullets from an SKS rifle.

thefrontpage December 3, 2008 at 12:16 pm

Just to be clear, and accurate, on this story’s timeline: This ornament story was first reported, as an exclusive, by “The Reliable Source” column, written by Amy Argetsinger and Roxanne Roberts, in the Tuesday, Dec. 2, 2008, editions of The Washington Post. In mid-afternoon–mid-afternoon, mind you–of Dec. 2, The Associated Press ran an item updating the story noting that the White House would indeed not be including the ornament on one of its holiday trees. The Reliable Source, naturally, since it broke the story, confirmed this update, as all updates on your own story are confirmed, and thus followed up with an item in TODAY’s, Wednesday, Dec. 3, 2008, Washington Post Reliable Source column. Thus, the story is exactly one day old. People: The Reliable Source broke the story, as this column has repeatedly broken newsworthy, interesting, funny stories through the years. That’s why the column remains one of the best-read columns in the Post.

ManchuCandidate December 3, 2008 at 12:22 pm

You’re saying that Sara is a Seven Point Six Two millimeter (Warsaw Pact). Full. Metal. Jacket?

WIDTAP December 3, 2008 at 12:23 pm

[re=189856]WhatTheHeck[/re]: Still – no references to handjobs, $20 and a blowjob, or buttsecks. So hey, Sara’s quality of posts is slipping, I think.

Toomush Infermashun December 3, 2008 at 12:27 pm

Gosh, I suppose my dogshit ornament doesn’t have a chance now….

shortsshortsshorts December 3, 2008 at 12:32 pm

This morning’s SF Chronicle version of this story’s headline reads:

Those goddamn liberals.

WhatTheHeck December 3, 2008 at 12:41 pm

I think Sara be looking good in full metal jacket.

MoodProcessor December 3, 2008 at 12:46 pm

Latest reports are that Sen. Joe Lieberman will hang the decoration from his superfluous third nipple.
He’s made no comment on the whereabouts of the newly created “Buck Fush” dreidel.

nmmagayar December 3, 2008 at 12:53 pm

But the Texas flag Truck Nutz are still going to grace the tree, Right?

thatonegirlsays December 3, 2008 at 1:23 pm

Terribly Offensive Ornament Maker made the front page of Seattle’s illustrious newsprint toilet paper this morning:

N8Ma December 3, 2008 at 1:35 pm

“get with the program, buster!”

dotdotdotdotdot December 3, 2008 at 1:54 pm

[re=189916]WhatTheHeck[/re]: Mmmmmmm chain mail bodice.

Sassette December 3, 2008 at 1:59 pm

Can’t they just hide it on the back of the tree where I hang all the ugly ornaments I get as gifts and thus feel obligated to use? It’s a time-honored solution.

zippy123 December 3, 2008 at 2:06 pm

I’m going to submit a request for 43 to pardon this poor, innocent ornament.

Biden Time December 3, 2008 at 2:28 pm

Lisa, I would like to buy your ornament. Where can I get one?

Kev-O-Tron December 3, 2008 at 2:42 pm

[re=189997]thatonegirlsays[/re]: Christ. I have subscription to that rag. Rest assured it did NOT make front page of aforementioned rag. Additionally, please be aware that I live in this woman’s district and if she so much as sets foot in my bar I will chastise her for having the gal to make such a shitty ornament when she represents a district with some real artistic talent.

Tra December 3, 2008 at 3:27 pm

You can take our ornament, Bushes, but you’ll never. take! our! FREEDOM!

Hmm? What’s that? Already gone? Oh. I see. Hmm.

Scratch that. Carry on.

semperfucked December 4, 2008 at 7:53 am

Does anyone actually know what the thing says? I can’t find a close-up that’s close enough to make it all out.

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