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And A Happy Thanksgiving To You, Saxby Chambliss!

How could we let Thanksgiving end without sharing C.S.A. Colonel Saxby Chambliss and family’s warm regards? What a lovely surprise! And the children! They tell us to vote for their “Big Daddy,” gross. “Big Daddy” responds with a white-knuckled clench of the little girl’s breast. [YouTube]

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About the author

Jim Newell is Wonkette's beloved Capitol Hill Typing Demon. He joined Wonkette.com in 2007, left for some other dumb job in 2010, and proudly returned in 2012 as our "Senior Editor at Large." He lives in Washington and also writes for things such as The Guardian, the Manchester paper of liberals.

View all articles by Jim Newell

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92 comments

  1. Lorax

    This freaked me out, and I’m from Arkansas. I’m pretty sure that I wouldn’t air an ad showing me doing the Creepy Grandpa Grope.

    And also: are you sure the kids didn’t actually solicit a vote for Big Diddy? I’m pretty sure that I heard ‘Diddy’.

  2. Texan Bulldoggette

    Well, that was…uncomfortably weird. That little girl sounds like the Shake & Bake girl (“& I helped”.) Those southern accents are so annoying–the minute a Southerner opens their mouth, you automatically think they’re a member of the clan or married to their 1st cousin.

  3. tunamelt

    [re=187033]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: Those southern accents are so annoying–the minute a Southerner opens their mouth, you automatically think they’re a member of the clan or married to their 1st cousin.

    While this is true, I find Northeast accents more terrible. Anything from that region of the country–I can’t understand a damn word they’re saying.

  4. pepe

    Wow that was muchhhh more grope-y than I expected from the summary. Holy shit… if a Democrat put out an ad like this he’d be called a pervert 89 times till Tuesday.

  5. Texan Bulldoggette

    [re=187034]tunamelt[/re]: True, but you assume they’re partly educated & not total idiots. The minute some Southerner opens their pie hole, you automatically shave off about 20 IQ points for them.

  6. subcorpus

    “I’m Sexy Chablis and I sure do approve THIS message” says the dirty old man as he grabs her prepubescent chest…


  7. Post author
    Jim Newell

    [re=187037]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: “True, but you assume they’re partly educated & not total idiots.”

    Ever been to, say, Boston?

    Someone is wearing her Elitist Liberal hat tonight.

  8. lada_sue

    Where’s the producer in this? Shouldn’t he have said, after “I’m Saxby Chambliss and I sure do approve this message {gropes little girl}”, “Okay, now let’s do a shot where you don’t molest your granddaughter.” ?

  9. Kwame'

    How many times did he say “Grampa needs to do just one more take”? Gah-ross. But that kid sounds like Gomer Pyle and Forest Gump’s retarded love child.

  10. Texan Bulldoggette

    [re=187040]Jim Newell[/re]: No, never been to Boston but I’ve lived in & visited enough Southern states to totally stereotype the knuckle dragging mouth breathers who live there.

  11. twoeightnine

    Isn’t he running for office in Georgia? You know that state where a woman is losing her house because as a teen she gave a blowjob to another teen? Where Genarlow Wilson was sentenced to 10 years in jail because a 15 year old consented to sucking his 17 year old dick? Someone bring charges against him.

  12. Simony

    Well, I guess it falls to…[*hrmm*]:

    Max Cleland’s right arm lies within a medi-midden heap admixture of eroding cement and Southeast Asian rainwater.

  13. WagTehGod

    I’m sorry, but if he’s a Republican then that young girl was no girl. Can’t be. Have we learned nothing from Cocktober?

  14. nyhfrog

    When the hell did this happen? I saw Troy Aikman feel up one of his daughters today the same way Sucksby just did.

    I moved out of the south back in ’93 and I swear nobody was “copping” their underage daughters in public back then–let alone in front of a camera.

    It must have happened during the Bush era–a resurgence of incest.

    Got out just in time.

  15. davesnothere

    Check out the child’s mother, on ole Saxby’s left. Even with the camera rolling, her eyes continually dart over to monitor the little girl’s safety – she’s seen this movie before!

  16. HuskyMescan

    That pedo-groping is just secret republican code. He’s giving a message to his base. And she’s safe, because she’s not a little boy.

  17. mattbolt

    I’m Chris Hansen with Dateline MSNBC’s To Catch a Senator, we’re doing another story on politicians who take advantage of children, why dontcha take a seat right there Mr. Chambliss

  18. tunamelt

    [re=187040]Jim Newell[/re]: You mean Bahhhhhston.

    I think. I actually don’t know what those people are saying.

  19. Wonks Adventure

    if grabbing the chest of a prepubescent senator’s daughter’s breast is wrong, i don’t want to be right.

  20. trondant

    [re=187041]Weeping Jesus[/re]: If that was Bristol Palin on his lap, you wouldn’t have seen anything but a blur of sweaty pogomotion. And maybe a coronary embolism right before he finished her off.

    [re=187063]Wonks Adventure[/re]: Granddaughter, please. All Southern Republicans (and by that I mean perverts) know to let it skip a generation before dipping their beaks. Why diddle your own children when they might grow up to point a gun at you before you slip into permanent senescence?

  21. SayItWithWookies

    Geeze. That reminds me of the joke that ends with the sister saying “Wow, you’re bigger than daddy.” And the brother responding, “That’s what mom says.”

  22. Weeping Jesus

    [re=187063]Wonks Adventure[/re]: A “prepubescent senator’s daughter”? I thought there was some kind of minimum age to be a senator….
    And to have a kid /before/ puberty…. Miracles…they happen every day!

  23. Aurelio

    [re=187061]tunamelt[/re]: Here is a lesson in Boston English: khakis – What you use to start the car.

  24. mothermaven

    That is just creepy-wrong and it seems that the republican side tends to do the lions’ share of the “creepy-wrong” don’t they. Can we have a collective shiver of disgust, brothers and sisters, and a amen?

    Is Ann Coulter’s jaw still wired shut? Thank the Lord.

  25. palmerdawg

    Maybe he thought his hand is the paper covering rock, you know.
    Rock, paper, scissors…….. anyone!!

  26. Lazy Media

    [re=187033]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: And that’s because you’re a provincial dumbass. Everyone knows that a NEW JERSEY accent is what actually indicates stupidity.

  27. Darehead

    Accents. Like John McCain’s under-choices, it all Depends.
    When Charlie Rose speaks, I swoon.
    When Saxby Chambilss speaks, I make sure no one has stolen my white sheets.

  28. Weeping Jesus

    I understand Saxby had his first marriage annulled on the grounds his wife was a virgin. His pappy told him, “Son, you done right. If she ain’t good enough for her own folk, she ain’t good enough for us.”

    (c) 155 B.C.

  29. Weeping Jesus

    I understand they talked him out of dubbing in a clown horn sound when he went for the udder shot. Maybe I’m wrong, but I think that would have given it some needed irony.

  30. Panderfinder

    Thanksgiving Wonkette. Thanks, Jim! There
    was not enough snark at one of the dinners I attended,
    where to Sole Republican rose up and announced
    “the republicans lost because of hatred of
    george w bush!”

    and for good reason, too, our hostess remarked.
    the host reminded everyone of the Age of
    Aquarius–you know, where everybody hated the
    george w bush who was busy cheerleading at Yale
    at the time.

  31. Kinbote

    [re=187066]Simony[/re]: The Long March through the comments commences.

    Without restraint!

    Without dead time!

  32. Texan Bulldoggette

    [re=187073]Lazy Media[/re]: Sorry, but there’s no way anyone is going to think Minnie Pearl, Jeff Foxworthy or any rube that watches Nascar is smarter than a Soprano, Bruce Springsteen or Bon Jovi.

  33. Pop Socket

    Jeff Foxworthy used to say that people spot you 10 IQ points for having a Southern accent. Seems you’re allowed two extra tiddie gropes as well.

  34. p-Sludge ofTheElves

    You people are sick!
    That’s not even Saxby Chambliss.
    It’s a robot nanny of Saxby Chambliss.

  35. monty

    so your going to leave us with saxby gropin some little girl until monday? i predict that the comments degenerate to “he touched her booby, HENNNNNGGH”

  36. Darehead

    In other news, Minnesota Representative M. Bachmann claims that it’s an “urban legend” that she once went on national TV to demand that Congress find out who are the loyal Americans and the disloyal Americans.

    So, if urbanites have legends, what do ruralites have? Just Big Daddies?

  37. guey de gueyes

    And who are the blind staffers who are working for this guy?

    Rule one of Thanksgiving political videos: if you grab a handful of anything but holiday Chex mix or smoked pig, reshoot the scene!

    Big daddy’s bliss should have been on the cutting room floor.

  38. CivicHoliday

    [re=187092]Darehead[/re]: Is “urban legend” the new code for “I have no recollection of those events, Senator?”

  39. Simony

    [re=187083]Kinbote[/re]: Ah Kinbote! Where to begin the affection? Even in advertising language: robust and authentic. You were with us in Catalonia for ’37. And certainly in the Ukraine with Mahkno. We ourselves have sung “Cops fall dead on The Corner…” to the tune of “It’s 5am, Chicago awakens…” Latterly, in St. Paul. (Thinking of Durruti? And the archbishop he knocked off?: You never went to pieces). Or again surrounding Hyde Park at ’08, against Trotski, while, beyond Palin, Hitchens was uncertain.

    We’re not a bunch of ‘militants’ like Mahdi Qa’eda. We’ll never again let _ourselves_ be used as the weapon of critique…
    http://newsbusters.org/blogs/mark-finkelstein/2008/11/01/wonkette-suggests-trig-wishes-he-was-aborted

    …AiiiiiiahhhhHHHHHH!!

  40. p-Sludge ofTheElves

    [re=187094]CivicHoliday[/re]: the know-nothing repugs always do this. They see the concepts being used by the educated liberal press, which really sting them, they don’t really understand what is being said. Then they uncomprehendingly hurl them back like so much feces.

    Vote Fraud – it is observed to be rampant on the repug side. They instantly start claiming dems are doing it.

    Smearing & character assassination – ditto

    Repeating Urban Legends – ditto

    etc

  41. DangerousLiberal

    Saxby Chambliss is one of the worst forms of human refuse on this planet, or any other, for that matter. Stuffing him and dipping him in deep fat wouldn’t be good enough.

  42. War Eagle

    I find myself in Georgia during Thanksgiving. It could be worse: I could be shopping at a New York Wal-Mart.

  43. TeddyS

    Sweet Sarah at the Turkey Shed! Doesn’t anybody on the staff even look at this shit before okaying it? Someone might say, “Senator, we gotta do another take, and don’t grab and jiggle the kid’s boobs this time.” Then the librul media takes the campaign money and runs the commercial just like you assholes shot it … and you bitch about it.

  44. Capitol Hillbilly

    i think that poor little girl is the daughter of lobbyist Bo Chambliss. so he can’t blow the whistle on Grandpa or he would lose his meal ticket. Tennesse Williams, where are you?

  45. iaro

    [re=187033]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: I am from Atlanta (born and raised), and let me tell you- none of the kids I’ve met have that damn accent (I guess we have the rise of the TV to thank for that), unless you’re A) from friggin’ Commerce, or B) you’re trying really, really hard. Hmmm.

  46. iaro

    [re=187044]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: Excuse me? ‘Knuckle-dragging mouth-breathers’? We’re not ALL stupid! Please reassess your assumptions.

  47. sk1win

    I’m sure that little girl will never hear from her junior high classmates about the aggressive ‘stop short’ move put on by her creep-tastic grandpa. No, kids that age are pretty understanding so she probably won’t be turning tricks for free junk behind a dumpster in 4 years.

  48. sk1win

    [re=187280]iaro[/re]: It’s interesting that you stereotype an entire town in one post and then ask someone not to stereotype people 3 minutes later. Maybe you should pull those knuckles off the ground and type an explanation for your obvious hypocrisy.

  49. Sans the Diaper

    [re=187313]sk1win[/re]: I don’t think you’re supposed to insult anybody.

    It’s like a new thing.

  50. Borat

    Yes, its a wonderful thing that Walnuts and Snowbilly are campaigning for this guy. I hope that their luck in winning elections is rubbed off on this perv.

    If I had to live in that house, I would have taken to drinking and drugs at a much much earlier age.

  51. Ted Perino

    They just showed this in Augusta during a break in the Auburn-Alabama game. It truly needs the glory of the big screen.

  52. tarnation

    Yeah, I can’t believe in this day and age people still have these stupid regional accents. I think anybody that talks like him should have all their property taken away from them to be distributed to us and be strung up from a strong bough of a pecan tree. How dare him.

  53. sarahconnor

    [re=187034]tunamelt[/re]: you mean you can’t understand a word what they’re sayin?

    I is lookin forward to Bible Spice doin some campaignin for Saxby this month! woo doggie!

  54. rambone

    hmm . . . well, that video really made me rethink my preconceptions. I had Saxby pegged for a rumpranger cause of his name, but it turns out he is just a heterosexual pedophile.

    The more you know.

  55. Cedar

    Holy crap! I read some of the comments before I watched the video, and I was like, “Oh, it’s not so bad,” and then he grabs her at the end! That poor girl is bruised.

  56. jodyleek

    [re=188431]rambone[/re]: Don’t count him out as a rumpranger so fast…he just prefers prepubescent granddaughter rump.

Comments are closed.