Barack Obama Worships At The Temple Of Basketball

  • Oh good gravy now homebuilders want a bailout. [Wall Street Journal]
  • Investors approve of Citigroup getting its bailout; on Friday the government agreed to invest $20 billion and guarantee over $300 billion of the bank’s troubled assets, and today the markets are expected to open higher. [AP]
  • Barack Obama has not attended church since the election, but now he is looking for DC-area house of worship. [ABC News]
  • Two roadside bombs and one suicide bomber outside the Green Zone killed at least 19 people in Baghdad today. [AFP]
  • Russian Prime Minister Vladimir Putin says he hopes the US and Russia will have a better relationship soon and that a President Obama will be “more constructive and responsible” in dealing with arms control matters. [AP]
  • Everybody wanted BOLD PROPOSALS from our President-elect Obama, so here is something bold: a $700 billion spending package, separate and distinct from the bank bailout, to save or create 2.5 million jobs. The point is this: we can now refer with impunity to “Obama’s extraordinarily large package.” [New York Times]

About the author

Sara K. Smith was Wonkette's morning editor from 2008 to 2010, and now contributes a weekly (?!) column to Wonkette, to prove she still loves you all!

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35 comments

  1. CivicHoliday

    The adorable puppet master Mr. Nate Silver has assured Mr. Franken he will win, by conducting a regression analysis, of the type I wept over while doing my Masters Thesis. Thanks for the bad memories, Nate, but as long as Coleman ends up in the toilet where he belongs, I’ll forgive you.

  2. memzilla

    How about we make the Citigroup bailout conditional on their investing in the US automakers? Wouldn’t that kill two birds with one stone?

  3. 4tehlulz

    >>Oh good gravy now homebuilders want a bailout.

    Don’t worry; people that actually make things will not be allowed to be bailed out, as that is socialism.

    The investment class, on the other hand, do not make anything of real value, so the normal rules of capitalism do not apply. They will be bailed out until the world runs out of ink.

  4. Serolf Divad

    [re=184272]Enturbulate[/re]:

    Holy Christ , she sounds like Cokie Roberts or Mara Liason. Does Public Radio do that to everyone? If I were interviewed on NPR would I turn into Garrison Keillor?

  5. El Kabong

    I know teh banks are having trouble… but isn’t advertising on wonkette like throwing good money after bad?

  6. monty

    [re=184277]ella[/re]: the chinee arent broke, and thats really all that matters. as long as they play enabler we’ll keep play junkie.

  7. MathewBrooks

    [re=184274]Serolf Divad[/re]: You know the answer to this is: OF COURSE YOU WILL. Lake Wobegon here you come!

  8. Enturbulate

    [re=184274]Serolf Divad[/re]:

    Yes! You’d get all soft ‘n’ doughy and find yourself singing horrible folky songs off key while waxing nostalgic about living in a frozed hell-hole. And you’d eat nothing but “hot dishes” which as everyone knows are only casseroles but made with only extra-heavy cream, butter and egg noodles.

  9. Larry McAwful

    Bail out the homebuilders? Sure, why the hell not? Let’s bail out everyone, irresponsible business practices be damned.

    We shouldn’t give the homebuilders a bailout so much as we should give them a government stipend to pay for housing the homeless in all those extra houses they built that they’re currently unable to sell. We could take care of the homeless, bail out the homebuilders and take care of all that unsold property, all in one fell swoop.

    Is President-Elect Obama sure he wants Bill Richardson as Secretary of Commerce? Because I’m obviously a goddamned genius, and I want a new job, anyway. I’m available, Barack. Call me!

  10. Lazy Media

    Obama should totes attend All Souls Unitarian Universalist. It’s chock full of former yippies and other librul crazoids. Got to give Fox something to talk about in the next election, after all.

  11. finallyhappy

    Why can’t Obama join a synagogue to make up for years of secret Muslin worship? I will see that he
    gets the special presidential plus secret service team discount if he joins my synagogue. Plus then he will have closer connections to those of us who truly run the world. We have fired the 12 guys who ran the finance part- they are now over at a Unitarian church.

  12. SayItWithWookies

    I knew Citigroup was in trouble last week when they sent me an email (they hold my mortgage — in much the same way that some teenage thug is “holding” the CDs that used to be in my car) with the heading “Citigroup strong, robust.” The text went something like, “Hey, we can’t even spell city, and we’re all pretty much either drunk or sobbing, but we’re doing great! Don’t worry ’bout us.”

  13. Polly Sigh-Entist

    I don’t know about ya’ll but I am all about any type of proposals (bold especially) from those with extraordinarily large packages…

  14. poptarts '

    So, let me get this straight: the guy who bulldozed the forest behind my house, destroyed my driveway, sucked the water out of my lake for his retention ponds, built a bunch of ticky-tacky (and empty) McMansions on fill-dirt, effectively turning my property into a giant bowl that put my house 2 feet underwater during Tropical Storm Faye, wants a bail-out?????? Developers and the majority of builders are scum. Let them eat dirt.

  15. poptarts '

    [re=184382]Sans the Diaper[/re]: That’s a result of a huge amount to self-restraint and a healthy dose of editing. Otherwise, I’d sound like Ted Kaczynski.

  16. sossajes

    team of rivals
    steam of rival

    steamo frival

    steam… up.. friv[o]l[ous]?

    Is he going to make soup from everyone who got the bailout?

  17. bitchincamaro

    [re=184282]Larry McAwful[/re]: My reaction is less humanitarian: let’s tear down the McMansions that replaced the housing torn down by the McMansion builders and throw up some wind turbines or some turnip patches. Either way.

Comments are closed.