Wonkette
One of the Festivus Miracles of American Journalism is that the Wall Street Journal is such a very good newspaper despite the daily presence of its editorial pages, which are run by a couple of brain-damaged wingnuts who would be unwelcome on AM talk radio, as callers. Today, one of these comical editors has typed up a wonderful economic theory about the current global recession which was caused by unmitigated over-leveraging of fanciful mortgage-based securities whose existence was encouraged by artificially cheap and unscrutinized credit and the resulting collapse of those securities’ values and the resulting credit crunch combined with the deeply intertwined decline of the real estate, construction, mortgage, investment and commodity markets, which was the primary and undisputed cause of the halt in consumer spending which has unarguably created a feedback loop of unemployment, debt default, foreclosures and negative economic activity all over the planet Earth: This was all actually caused by somebody not saying “Merry Christmas” at the mall!
Here are the relevant (?) words of this tragic (yet well-compensated) fool, Daniel Henninger, the “deputy editor of The Wall Street Journal’s editorial page,” about the Financial Crisis:
This year we celebrate the desacralized “holidays” amid what is for many unprecedented economic ruin — fortunes halved, jobs lost, homes foreclosed. People wonder, What happened? One man’s theory: A nation whose people can’t say “Merry Christmas” is a nation capable of ruining its own economy.
Oh. My. God. Really? “One had better explain that,” Henninger adds. Sadly, his “explanation” is some indecipherable nonsense about how working-class evangelicals — you know, the ones who all just lost their houses because they’re too dumb and poor, and are going to the emergency rooms so TAXPAYERS can pick up the tab for their basic medical treatment, etc.? — are the Moral Ballast of our Nation, and if only we were all ignorant bitters who can’t take care of ourselves, the Economy would be strong. What?
It has been my view that the steady secularizing and insistent effort at dereligioning America has been dangerous. That danger flashed red in the fall into subprime personal behavior by borrowers and bankers, who after all are just people. Northerners and atheists who vilify Southern evangelicals are throwing out nurturers of useful virtue with the bathwater of obnoxious political opinions.
And … let’s see, check word count, long enough! Save & Send & Let’s get the fuck out of here and down to Happy Hour, Amen. Maybe, some day, the WSJ editorial pages won’t be the most reliable font of hilarious weirdness in America, but today is not that day.
Mad Max and the Meltdown [Wall Street Journal]
The next four years are just gonna be super. Also, is “dereligioning” even a word?
Does this mean that Jeebus is the new Grinch?
goddamn, i thought that once we elected a muslim for president it meant we won the war on xmas.
on a side note, just to get it off my northeaster atheist chest, i just dont understand how conservatives have gotten their head so far up their ass that they think stuff like this is a legitimate issue. can’t they switch the channel from fox every once in awhile and realize they have made a fantasy reality for themselves? this is why they thought screaming about bill ayers was somehow going to win them independents.
Well this makes perfect sense. If the babies have already been thrown out with the bathwater, it’s certainly the moral thing to do to throw the nurturers out behind them.
In any event, I spend most of my vilification on Alaskan and Coloradan evangelicals, not Southern ones.
The rural and Jesusy south has always been the economic engine of this country. These down-to-earth bible thumpers are why we’re better than, say, Medieval France, which didn’t have enough ignorant, religious, dirt farmers. Yup, just like the Taliban, who sucked because they were too fucking cosmopolitan. The Enlightenment ruined absolutely everything.
Damn, from the title of the post, I thought Jonah Goldberg was going to finally uncover for LA Times readers the “economy-Nazis” that are ruining American capitalism. (Obama mostly.)
And the darn jews, with their socialistic Haunkah. Everyone knows the Macabees were just terrorists and upity community organizers.
False. The economic crisis/credit crunch/all the world’s problems are the direct result of those fucking Saved By Zero ads that are on pretty much wall to wall, all the time:
http://urbzen.com/2008/11/20/five-dollar-footlong-vs-saved-by-zero/
Also, I just unfollowed Santa on twitter. Have a nice day.
Gack!
The dehenningeralization of the WSJ is it’s only hope for salvation.
We need the Lizard People, now more than ever.
And Thus Jesus died to increase consumer spending.
Isaiah 6:14
Everyone overlooks that quote.
Tomorrow’s WSJ Editorial: Throw The Jew Down The Well
Cloudman:
If we’re going to give him “desacralized”, then why not throw in “dereligioning” as a bonus.
Haha he just implied that redneck evangelicals are like stupid crying babies who cry and are stupid.
“Northerners and atheists who vilify Southern evangelicals are throwing out nurturers of useful virtue with the bathwater of obnoxious political opinions.”
Wait. That means nurturers are taking baths in obnoxious political opinions? Why are they doing that?
This is a pretty good phrase though:
“subprime personal behavior“
The market may not be in the tank but it’s seriously tanking just now. God is probably just pissed off at hedge fund managers, brokers and bankers because they’re so fucking greedy. And many innocents are drowning in the Flood.
On the other hand, a return to traditional pagan hillbilly values such as selling moonshine would be a great way to weather the financial crisis.
Remember when the WSJ was a legitimate news source? Look for Bill-o to be screaming about this tonight. Merry Fucking Christmas!
*jaw drops, resists all efforts to replace in normal position, rendering speech impossible*
It is because I killed Santa.
I smugly chortle like Edward G. Robinson in The Ten Commandments and ask, “Where’s your Santa nowwwwww?”
Cloudman: Hey Cloudman. I got Calculon.
I call bullshit on ” dereligioning ” thats not a word this guy is just making shit up. secularizing <<<not to sure about this one either
“Northerners and atheists who vilify Southern evangelicals are throwing out nurturers of useful virtue with the bathwater of obnoxious political opinions.”
Ah yes … those would be the “Jesus Wants You All To Be Rich” preachers, wouldn’t they? I can see where they would have acted as a brake on this untoward behavior. Oh, if only we had paid them heed!
bonghitsforjesus: …and don’t forget marriages to 13 year old girls and first cousins. Pedophilia and mongoloids for everyone!
Maybe we’re not saying “Merry Christmas” because we’ll all be eating Hobo Soup for X-mas dinner, crazypants.
That danger flashed red in the fall into subprime personal behavior by borrowers and bankers, who after all are just [lizard] people.
Im in ur economiez,
killin ur holidayz
Dereligioning?
Why not just say unreligioustizing?
Does this bitch have email? If so, give it here.
Another Revelation: The Bush Administration’s Many Failures Are Because Of This One Random Stupid Fat Guy In South Jersey Somewhere.
Also: Hemorrhoids Are Apparently Because Of Wiping My Ass With Henninger’s Columns.
No this is good. All President Hopey has to do in his Inaugural speech is say, “A belated Merry Christmas to everyone! And Happy Easter for good measure!” and the economy will fix itself, and everyone will say, “Why didn’t that idiot Bush think of that???”
Hey where do I get me one a them Santa’s on a Cross? I got a kids Xmas party commin up.
The defenestration of Daniel Henninger is the only solution!
Dereligioning? Perhaps people are just burned out from being unwilling participants or the victims of Corporate America’s “gimme-gimme” and “success by any means” ideologies. Al Qaeda made that point abundantly clear. I don’t think they’ve been dereligioned.
ok so maybe i was a bit harsh. secularizing is actually a word. This doosh still needs to get kicked in the nutz. and not in the good way either
Desacre Bleu!
Oh, Christ on a Chrutch.
Well, I’m off to get a stigmata tat.
NO…that means that Jebus is the new Gingrich
I think he’s saying that only if people were afraid of being punished by God for making stupid decisions, they wouldn’t take out huge loans on houses they couldn’t afford. The reality, though, is that Jesus forgives people for their sins. So really, it’s Jesus’ fault.
(And yes, for those keeping score, that is three ess-apostrophe possessive constructions I’ve managed today.)
Daniel Henninger lives on a different planet from me.
There is only one person in my family whose lack of ethics enveloped him in the subprime crisis. Unsurprisingly, he is the hardcore fundamentalist who lives in Real North Carolina, and says that dinosaurs walked the Earth a few thousand years ago.
Working as a ’self-employed home inspector’, he put his wife’s life savings as a down payment on a half-million dollar house (well, a half-million dollar mortgage, actually. The house isn’t worth quite that much anymore).
When he’s not inspecting houses these days (which is quite more often than you might think), he spends his hours casting himself as Job, wondering why God is putting him through these trials. Yes, now he believes that God is the one who financially sodomized his family.
Anyway, he is not afraid to say Merry Christmas in public.
Now wait a minute. Didn’t Whatshername at the NRO go on and on yesterday at apparently considerable physical risk to herself (what with all that “blindfold and last cigarette” talk) about how the Southern Evangelicals are responsible for the explosion and maybe even death of the GOP Elephant? So today here’s this dude saying that, no, the Southern Evangelicals are in fact the ONLY ones who can possibly stuff the GOP Elephant’s intestines back into it’s heaving, sweaty carcass before they (the Evangelicals, not the intestines) head out to the strip malls and box stores of America to save Christmas for all the heathens who are about to start believing in Jeebus because that’s the only way these “fortunes” they’ve amassed (apparently) are going to become unhalved praise the Lord and let’s send little Salim to “Jesus Camp” tomorrow.
No wonder the GOP is in full-on clusterfuck mode.
Cloudman: Mr. Henninger needs a good de-making-words-upping.
SayItWithWookies: You are all the cats’ pajamas.
OH COOL, we can totally fix the economy!
Everybody go to church and say you’re sorry to Jesus and sing “Away in a Manger” at the top of your lungs and wish everyone and everything a Merry Christmas and then everything will be OK. Once we stop with all this secular society crap and remember that the one and only path to any form of morality is by being a nice, judgmental Christian who looks down on others God will make it start raining money from the sky just like he did with bread and the jews right around Easter. (No, not Passover. That was a test! Get with the program, you heretic.)
This theory probably kills at the country club, but in the real world? Asshat.
obfuscator: desacralizing sounds like something my chiropractor would do for a stiff lower back.
I’m a Puritan, and think that Christmas is a wicked idolatorous orgy. Where do I fit in here?
religion is not a verb, and that is a big problem with “dereligioning.”
take away the awkward prefix and the present-tense “-ing”, and it would be “to religion,” and that just makes no sense.
but if you wanted to make it active, it could be “to religionalize…” or…
WAIT - is this what they mean by “VERBAGE?”
I actually went and read that horseshit. My God. We’re in this mess because we’re not fucking Christian enough? Jesus H. Fucking Christ. Southern Evangelicals are the only ones who respect the moral codes, “chalk lines,” and responsibility that would keep greed and lack of accountability in check? I’m so infuriated by this stupidity that I’m going to go kick a Christian in the ass right now. I’d rather kick a WSJ editor, but they obviously spend all their time locked away in some vault deep underground where news of evangelical sex and money scandals never reaches.
It’s a WonderfulLife.
oh, and is it just me or are more and more real things sounding like Onion headlines these days?
“More ‘Merry Christmas’ Will Stop Foreclosures, Economist Says!”
“Lobbyist Impaled by Rutting Deer, Uses Binder Clip on Wound, Goes to Meeting”.
Haha… I’m looking at finance.google.com to see how teh moneyz are evaporating… DOW down to 7500… Noticed this comment at the bottom which is full of win:
Re: look out below - I’m on the ledge
florid..@gmail.com - 1 minute ago (3 posts)
I have some really good possum and rat recipes.
clover: word salad
What the hell is the conservatives’ problem with basic causality? But! Because America needs to know, Henninger should debate Limbaugh, who believes that Barry Hussein’s socialism –> the recession. Coming soon, was it Teh Geh –> earthquakes, fires and mudslides in California, 911 and Katrina, or was it Viagra producing too much teen masturbation?
Ken et al: Not to worry. This is first stage aporia. The best tack for these poor souls is to let them flail. Wingnut Christians and the Christianists are starting their own Reformation. Over time change, lovely change will occur. Just keep your distance and make sure you have plenty of popcorn and beverages while you watch the rationalizations and blaming accrue. Bedtime for Bonzo indeed.
freakishlystrong: Fuck me…It’s a
Wonderful Life.There’s that sexy italic capital J again. Sweet.
shanemcgowan: Green scaly change we can believe in!
What a moron. I live in the South, I love the South, but I’m not stupid enough to hold the South up as an example of financial virtue. You want people who know how to throw a party with good food and good music? You need the Southern extravagance. You want people who know how to manage their money and, more importantly, their debt? You need Yankee frugality.
This is just soooo wrong.
I’m not sure why you wasted your time reading that, Ken. I get the paper WSJ every morning, and the first thing I do after taking it out of the plastic wrap is throw the editorial pages into the recycling bin. The only exception is on Fridays, when they publish the learned prose of famous wordsmith Peggy Noonington. On those days, I set it aside for later, after work, when I can get in the right frame of mind (ie, ingest a cocktail of mescaline, cocaine, and LSD) to appropriately enjoy her work.
The best parts of the WSJ are Money & Investing and Marketplace. Those two sections alone are good enough for me to justify paying $99/year for the subscription (which is more than I can say of the NYT).
The entire article is amazing.
It’s as if Sarah Palin speed-read a financial crisis article by Bill Kristol and tried to repeat it from memory a week later, with it being transcribed on deadline by a Hoover Institute intern (from Regent University, with two classes in economics under his thoroughly closeted belt) spending so much time correcting it for grammar, sentence structure, and replacing obvious non-words with genuine textbook-glossary-sanctioned economic terms, that he had no time to do the “make sure it vaguely makes sense” part of the job.
No, seriously, read the article.
That’s me in the corner
That’s me in the spotlight
Dereligioning …
Christy, solve the problem by letting the red states form their own country. The blue states would be rich and powerful as long as they kept strict border control.
Then the red states could do what ever they like….ban gays, ban abortion, pray everywhere, home school all their kids, build monuments to Jesus on every street corner and park, burn books and movies, have a nationalized religion and press, and give away free guns to everyone. They could have their wet dream of a free market Theocracy.
metropolitan: “can’t they switch the channel from fox every once in awhile and realize they have made a fantasy reality for themselves?”
I’ll assume you didn’t know that Rupert Murdoch also owns the WSJ.
The battle for stupidest post-election reactionary columnist is going to be an ugly one, with Jonah Goldberg and William Kristol whacking themselves in the heads with giany s*x t*ys to produce the concussion level needed to write their respective column.
My personal behavior may be called any number of bad names, but “sub-prime” is where I draw the line.
Fuck you, Daniel Hennghe!!!!!!1111!
or gian_t_ s*x t*ys, at least.
Henninger predates Murdoch; along with John “Creepy Stalker” Fund and Peggy “Magic Xanax Jesus Dolphin Box of Wine Orgy” Noonan, they comprise the most organic brain-damaged team outside of the National Review Online.
Jesus was a hobo. He did not own a house, a tent, a car, a horse and wagon, a stock account, a pension plan, a gold card, etc. He was born in a barn and spent his life wandering around like a drifter.
This year, we will all get closer to Jesus by living the way he did — poor and homeless.
Merry frickin’ Christmas WSJ!
Iggy Plop: i heard the “H” stand for Hubert. what say you?
Wow — he had me at “fortunes halved”. Yeah, when my second billion disappeared, that’s when I got religion!
problemwithcaring: “Retarded Person Has Economic Theory” = “Dog Bites Man”. Real news would be “Retarded Person Has No Economic Theory”
When I was a missionary in Africa, I was dereligionised… It involved a big iron cauldron.
one morning a couple of years ago Rachel Maddow said something like “… I don’t know if you have ever seen the WSJ Editorial Page but it will BURN YOUR EYES.” And consequentially I have never seen it.
Wait. I thought this was all because teh House Negroes went and bought houses on zero down, broken ARMs underwritten by bankers scared of Bill Clint0n and teh c0mmunity 0rgan1zrz.
Or is that tomorrow’s editorial page?
Wait, why should we care what some tie-dyed magician thinks about the economy?
So is it okay to make “I dereligioned your mom, last night!” jokes yet? Or do we have to wait a few more hours? I’m jonesin here.
Wha? Who keeps publishing these idiots? Poor bitter thing sounds maybe like HE lost his fortune. Dickbag.
Uncle Al: He must’ve thought of it. If there’s one thing Dubya doesn’t overlook, it’s a five-minute solution to a complex and intractable problem. It’s possible he tried it, but then got distracted by something shiny.
It is things like this which make me look forward to bowel movements.
If Henninger really wants to see economic calamity, he should imagine what would happen if everybody spent Christmas contemplating spiritual values instead of shopping.
WadISay: The Baby Jesus read that and cried. Why do you hate the Baby Jesus?
And America?
And Goldman Sachs?
Time”s ripe for opening a den of iniquity; I shall call it “Northerners and Atheists”. Thanks Hengghee.
Come on, he could have written the column in just six words:
“It is the F’ing Jews’ fault.” Jews get offended when people say Merry Christmas. The Jews work in the financial markets. Therefore it is the Jews fault that our economy sucks now. Of course he couldn’t just come out and say it - it would offend his coworkers and his column would be way short. Look throughout history, whenever we have economic crisis there is always a group of wingnuts that blame the Jews.
“Great Zeus!” this Pagan proudly says, “I haven’t seen a more incomprehensible mess since the last time I read freshman writing assignments at Duke!”
Sigh. And some traditional media outlets wonder why blogs are getting so popular…
jeebus, Ken, are you still suffering the after-effects of the Montecito fire? that
second sentence in your lede looks like it was composed by mooselini. or
maybe it was just the after-effect of reading anything on the WSJ ed page.
have a long and happy happy hour.
There’s a video clip, too!
I qotez: Did the forces behind the movement to replace “Merry Christmas” with “Happy Holidays” have any correlation to the nation in a financial crisis? Dan Henninger of WSJ Editorial page looks at the issue. (Nov. 20)
Crap, they’re on to us all. Set the plastic explosives under the computer desks and melt into the night, forces.
I’m tired of people not realizing that it is ENGINES which are the engine of our country.
answerbird: don’t forget the ACLU, but I guess he’d lump them in with Jews.
Dear Jesus H. Christ, please send us a new Tomás de Torquemada. Make him handsome, like Mittens, with a reality-based TeeVee show.
So the WSJ’s theory is that the free market only works if we have an underclass of duty-driven churchbags unable to make rational economic decisions about, like, mortgages and such.
Alternatively: Godless Street needs some God-fearin’ folk to fistfuck. With an invisible hand, of course.
An anagram of desacralize: iz scare deal. (this is partly in lol cat - sorry)
Come on people, we all know who runs the economy, saying Happy Hanukkah will double the GNP overnight.
Wow. These three sentences actually followed each other in the SAME PARAGRAPH:
“It has been my view that the steady secularizing and insistent effort at dereligioning America has been dangerous …”
[Okay, you're free to think that if you want ... but ...]
“… That danger flashed red in the fall into subprime personal behavior by borrowers and bankers, who after all are just people….”
[ Unh?? So we need less regulation and MORE RELIGION in our banking system? ]
“… Northerners and atheists who vilify Southern evangelicals are throwing out nurturers of useful virtue with the bathwater of obnoxious political opinions.”
whoah.
Um, individually, those thoughts are merely outdated. Taken together, they showcase how terminally nutballz the Deputy Editor is.
George W. Bush wasn’t born again enough, then?
Here’s how we START to fix the economy. All states get their Federal subsidies in direct proportion to what their citizens pay in income tax. That includes closing all the military bases that provide the only employment available in places like Alabama and South Carolina. The bitters will have to eat their computers for food and won’t have enough money to buy the stamps required to keep their Save Christmas campaigns going, so we’ll all have some peace and quiet for our future winter solstice celebrations. And don’t worry about Alaska. They won’t have any jobs or bridges but they’ll have water from the melting ice caps and Sarah can feed them all moose stew.
Cloudman: I like my made up words to have a little more pizazz than that. “Dereligionizing” just doesn’t cut it for me. I think it would be better if he called us “Anti-Jeso” or something.
Clearly I’ve been laboring under the delusion that it’s, say vast disparities in wealth, education and political access that contribute to our economic problems. Turns out it’s our societal failure to recognize the birth of our lord and saviour Jesus Christ, which just coincidentally falls right around the winter solstice, just as He was risen up right ’round Easter time in the spring. Thanks for lifting the scales from my eyes WSJ!
Pray, mister WSJ asswipe editor sir, when was the US “religioned”?
During the Panic of 1837?
The “Long Depression of 1876″?
The Crash of 1907?
The Crash of 1929?
—- The Lizard People demand answers. We shall not be denied. Hugs.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Panic_of_1837
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Long_Depression
The editor’s summary of the current crisis is sheer brilliance.
Anyhoo,
You’re totally right those bitters are ballast. All we have to do is throw them overboard and we’ll gain altitude real quick.
Then we could have a fancy party. With airships. Think about it!
Of course, I didn’t read this, except Ken’s little sucked-off piece about dereligioning, but, even after such heavy lifting, I don’t get it….do evangelicals have little Ceasar dollars that spend differently than the rest of our In God We Trust greenies?… or was it that the secular cheaters were taking loans we couldn’t afford, against some 12th or 13th commandment which says, THOU SHALT NOT BORROW MORE THAN THOU SHOULDST. But if this second thing is the hot ticket to hell, what about the Muslins who don’t believe in borrowing at interest, thus giving a job opportunity to jews…wait, are jews included in the dereligoning…. I’m going to have to subscribe to a steady diet of WSJ if I ever have a hope of understanding….or I could just keep drinking….hard decisions….
Oh no Toomush, keep drinking!!
tiger: Oh, whew….’cause I already did….
answerbird: It’s worse than that. People blame the Jews for everything. Your country lost WWI? Blame the Jews. Population decimated by plague? Jews again. Potato salad went bad? Frickin’ Jews!
See, I thought Christians would be at fault for this whole economic hoohah because they’re not supposed to care about money or material things because they’ve got a pony and castle waiting in the Kingdom of Heaven for them so they’d just burn this country down in the name of the lawd.
Also I just realized that if you subtract “eon” from “economic” you get “comic”! Hooray everything is funny now!
I wish Christ would hurry up and get back here. I wanna nail him back up on that fucking cross for leaving us with all of his idiot followers. Why couldn’t Christianity have been more like Heaven’s Gate?
zetetic: I blame the Jews for everything; problem is, I’m Jewish, so I have no one to blame but myself.
coolcatdaddy: man, think about sol invictus! he is going to be so pissed when he realizes his party was totally rustled by some poor jew.
zetetic: Let’s not forget that 9/11 was an inside job… done by da JOOS!
I blame fucking Santa Claus. If He hadn’t been so busy hyping up this holiday, there would be no holiday spending consumer index to measure and bemoan. Bartender, another round of dereligioning, stat.
Nonsensical article. Plus, Christmas is all about greed, and what drove the mortgage crisis? Greed!
Who are the wingnuts blaming for ruining Merry Christmas? Retailers. Because of course, the holiday is all about retail.
These people would make baby Jeebus cry, if he’d existed, which is debatable.
Didn’t our founding fathers stipulate there should be a separation of Church and The Wall Street Journal?
You “Secular Progressives” are all alike.
Flaunting your “intelligence” and “Education” and “Hopeyness.”
Why not move to Communiststan or wherever you traiterists and athiestniks pray to and leave America to the Hannity buttlikers who REALLY understand the true meaning of “Americanness” and “Patriotness” and hating “Commiefaginess.”
Jesus loves ignorant rednecks. The Bible says so, and if you still don’t believe it, just look at how many he created in his Godly Redneckian image!
Merry Christmas, liberal scumbags.
If you wish me a Happy Holidays, I might just whip up on your commie secular homo ass.
WadISay: They obviously never heard of the fallacy that is post hoc ergo propter hoc. jackasses.
This is just lazy, boilerplate War-on-Christmas stuff, in the same way that Bill O’Reilly’s brief shockumentary on San Francisco this week was lazy, boilerplate San-Francisco-Values stuff. There seem to be only about 7 or 8 conceits in the wingnut mind, drifting around like turds in a toilet bowl. In the wake of Obama’s victory, these people are wandering about in benumbed ruminations, forgetting to flush.
Butterfly wings. One homo forgoes saying “Merry Christmas” to his fellow homo, and presto! A Muslim terrrrist wins in a landslide.
sati demise: So yeah they coulda just fucking seceded and all would be well today? Prolly so. Oh and before I forget Merry f’in Christmas all you stooges, oh and wait remind me I should care bout this dow jones thing again.
Hey, whatever happened to the epidemic of flag burning in the USA?
Doesn’t anybody care anymore?
Doglessliberal: No, it is not just you.
It’s true. a nation that can not say Merry Christmas IS doomed the way a city that can not say Hey, get the fuck out the way, can’t you see I’m walkin’ here will not be chosen to host large conventions attracting rural midwesterners and a person who can not say Pass the clam sauce, please gets nothing to put on top of his linguini. All of which is relevent to the economy if you’re paying attention. Which I’m not! and neither should you!
Doglessliberal: your chiropracter performs castrations?
The D: or an underclass of church-driven douchebags. whichever.
You people have no appreciation for stupidity. You Elitist bastards.
As a person who fully embraces the Institution of Stupid, I will now convert into Paultard currency and destroy you all.
Post Hoc Ergo Propter Hoc . . .
No, wait, Post Trends-that-don’t-really-exist Ergo Propter Trends-that-don’t really exist.
I guess that works?
I a strange way I sort of agree. Christmas has become a soulsucking and depressing institution whereby we are forced to buy shit we don’t need for people we hate. However, Christanity in this country has not only been ruined by reactionary thugs who look to ancient purity laws as a way to vindicate their own prejudices, but also been destorted beyond all recognition by capitalists imperatives that have forced such feast days grounded in traditional and joyful folk celebrations of sacred mysterys to be economically useful. Fuckers at the Wall Street Journals should really look at themselves in the mirror to see how there all consuming worship of Mammon had basically destroyed any vestigages of traditional religion grounded in communal and unrepentatly useless celebration. Nevermind that the ethics of the Gospels (concider the birds of the air) is completely incompatable with the capitalist lifestyle. I may be agnostic, but I hate these fuckers for taking what was good about the tradition and replacing it with BUY BUY BUY. Saying Merry Christmas? What about when a poor man asks you for you cloak you give him you shirt as well? Do that and then come fucking lecture me. Asshole.
Thank goodness someone was finally able to make the connection between the number of evangelicals in this country and how much virtue and economic stability we have.
Sorry if someone’s already said this, but; “Dereligioning”?
BRING. IT. ON.